A Self Portrait In Letters, Anne Sexton/ "Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep", Mary Elizabeth Frye/ The

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*sees a same sex couple*

so which one of you is the fullmetal alchemist and which one of you is the *slightly different voice* fullmetal alchemist

unhinged YouTube channels to quench all your thirst for chaotic sciences stuff

TheBackyardScientist- pretty straight forward, a lot of ridiculous what if videos as in “what if we filled a pool with molten lava or dry-ice, electrifying sand etc. pretty chaotic, they destroy A LOT of fish-tanks in their processes

Styropyro- You like fire? you like LASERS? You like literal death-rays build from stuff you can buy from e-bay? Also sometimes there is completely unhinged science recipes (like making rocketfuel from sugar and stump remover) taking from late 19th-early 20th century DIY science books that make the anarchist cookbook look kind of lame

Michael Reeves- Fun weird robotics and coding, robots build from household items and whatever you can salvage anywhere, not as informative as the others mentioned but very fun and unhinged, also coding tutorials

JLservideos- cool gadgets and build inspired by pop-culture like Superhero movies, fairly in-depth explanations on the building process, still easily digestible, wall climbing shoes, taser gloves and human flying drones are just a few of the very cool projects

The Thought Emporium- The closets thing to a RL mad scientist YouTube has to offer, straight up bioengineering at some points, very bio focused in general, manipulating viruses, growing synthetic flesh and silk, and using human neurons to build a computer

Sexy Cyborg- Machine coding and 3d printing, hiding cool gadgets in everyday objects, building automated bartenders etc. self build anti-surveillance tech

refers to myself as "The Management"

perhaps those who seek whump/angst fics and those who seek soft/sweet fics are not so different….maybe we all long for what we think will heal us….revenge for some….love for others…..there is a fine line between tenderness and pain that we all must explore and when real life falls short we turn to the characters we project on for the catharsis we cannot give ourselves…..

thirty day thinspo challenge pt.8

day eight: your workout routine

im a varisty swimmer and sets change every practice so i can’t exactly post the sets we do or expect people who don’t swim to do a varsity set as a workout

but i do have a dry workout routine bc coach likes to kill our muscles when it’s not season or the weekends or it’s like winter break or something

this is one set:

60 crunches

50 jumping jacks

40 sit ups

35 squats

30 pushups

20 lunges

20 candlesticks

20 leglifts

3 min plank

3 min wall sit

60 leg raises

we usually do at least two sets of this when we don’t have practice and if you don’t stretch before and after your arms and legs will fall off so do that first if you’re gonna try this

but yeah this is it

*my friend is happy and talks a lot* my mind: "yay that's nice I'm happy for her"

*my friend talks less/her tone changed* my mind: " you stupid asshole she hates you you did sth wrong she hates you so much you're a horrible friend you dont deserve her as a friend you're ruining everything you're horrible you're the worst friend ever"

I HATE THAT I HAVE IT LIKE THAT #bpd ✌🏻

songs that have helped me through hard times

so0o, i do have these (+ some others) all on a playlist (here)

remember this is just how i perceive the songs and they might not be how you feel about them

in case you don’t live forever - ben platt: this is a song that hits harder because sometimes you can’t get the words out to someone before they leave your life. it’s a song that has a lesson to it, one that everyone should learn

two of us - louis tomlinson: this song is a huge tear jerker, for personal reasons i’m not going to elaborate though. it’s a very raw song, and any one that has struggled with the loss of someone should hear it

invisible - 5 seconds of summer: i used to feel like i was just always there, but never *there*.  admittedly i found this song after i really needed it, but it makes me mourn the girl i used to be. this entire song pulls at my heartstrings and it will always have a special place in my heart for how accurate the lyrics are

broken home - 5 seconds of summer: as a child of divorced parents, this song also hits different. “hey mom hey dad, when did this end? when did you lose your happiness” always makes me tear up. its a song i needed when i was younger. 

bumper cars - alex and sierra: from multiple friendships/relationships i relate to this song. its wanting this person so bad but you know you cant have it because you two just don’t mix and it makes a bigger mess. this song is more of an idea of sadness for me, it doesn’t directly make me think of one thing

finally, the most important one

you cant rush your healing - trevor hall

i could probably go on for days about how much strength this song gave me, but alas, i’m limited to a paragraph. i found this song after a really big change in my life, it was actually recommended to me by my aerial teacher. lyrically, its one of the most comforting songs i’ve ever listened to. i go to it anytime i feel anxious, sad, or in need of something to help me. 

you cant rush your healing, you have to go through every emotion and let yourself actually feel it. that’s something i had to learn. honestly, if i hadn’t found this song/the people from my aerial studio i would probably still be in the same endless (so it feels like) loop of sadness and frustration. 

this is a song you have to find at the right time to be able to understand. the first time i listened to it it was late at night, i felt tired, and i let it play on a loop listening to the lyrics just crying because i felt like i found something that could really help me (and it did)

fuck therapy i’m becoming a knight

Genius. Thank u for this wisdom😌

I always hate it when people are all “so do you go to school, or are you working, or” and I either have to

make up some lie, or

eventually get around to “I am not working because of depression/anxiety,” and subsequently have to deal with whatever bullshit-riddled and completely unsolicited opinions on mental illness this stranger feels obligated to share with me.

So my therapist was like, “You don’t have to do either. You can just say you haven’t worked in a while because you’re recovering from an illness.”

I tried it when the home inspector was here today, and it fucking worked. He was like, “oh, I’m sorry, are you doing better now,” and I’m like yeah, and don’t worry, it’s not contagious, awkward laugh, and we moved on.

MY THERAPIST. IS A GENIUS. Because it is an illness, so it’s not a lie to say that, and it’s also none of his business to know specifically what it is, and I clearly don’t want to give more details, so we should move on from this topic. MY THERAPIST IS A GODDAMN GENIUS.