I’m 99% Sure These Are All Mine. The One Percent Is The NASA Photo (I’ve Been There But I Can’t

tree of grackles

favorite color: black

last song: space bound - eminem 

currently reading: John Winchester’s journal

currently watching: The punisher

currently craving: that sonic burger I keep getting fuckin adds for 

coffee or tea: it depends 🤷‍♂️

tags:

@cool-lesbian-is-here, @stitchedribs, @soapiezzzz, @deadendgoal, @multimusiclover, @bloodynrves <33

Thanks @youreyesaremyfavoritecolor <3

get to know your moots tag game ! ✶ answer the questions, then tag six people

favorite color ꕀ green and brown last song ꕀ tú by maye currently reading ꕀ the luminaries by susan dennard currently watching ꕀ the great british baking show currently craving ꕀ massaman curry. like always. and like. alcohol and a couple cigs HAHA. a break too :P coffee or tea ꕀ always tea! i don't like coffee

ty for the tag @saltcxrcle ! tagging: @lelapine @toadspondofwhimsy @outof-spite @h0neyst4rz @hhoneylemon @our-lady-of-venom

i’m in a winter mood, (i’m) dreamin’ of spring now

i miss sitting in the back of a pickup truck with my best friend. playing in the mud and making swords out of sticks. boys will be boys (until one of them’s a queer). We were like family until i came out was outed. if you read this i think you’d know who you are. cause you said i was your only friend and then spat in my face the next day. that awful day. all i wanted was for things to stay the same. all i want is my childhood back. please. my lips are bloody and my knuckles are bruised. i’m the same person i was back then, so why the hell don’t i mean the same thing i used to mean to you?

The wind is as cold as my feet tonight.

Outside on thanksgiving, in my grandparents back yard. I’m almost half as tall as the tree that once towered over me. I’m more comfortable here than I am inside. I like being alone better sometimes, when my head isn’t too loud. And I am grateful for many things. For him. For my best friend/the only girl I’ve ever loved. For my cat. For the cool windy air. For stolen, secret lunch-break kisses, and flirting with people I’ll never have. that the band that’s always been a part of me, might now actually work out someday. For my cousin. For the bands on the radio that got me this far. That I can express how I feel, even if it’s only in what I write. For all my friends, the people I know I can count on. That he’s still alive. I think the thing I’m most grateful for is that I’m still alive to experience the rare good things in my life. I held on long enough for that. And it would be a tragedy if I had died before finally being happy. Goodnight, I guess. (For once I think I mean that.)

Reddit just gave me a THREE DAY ban. I hate my life

By Sibil George photography

Courtney Love is actually super hot, you’re all just wrong btw

hope this helps!! 🩷🩷🩷

with tears in my eyes, I begged you to stay/you said, “hey man, I love you, but no fucking way” or (kiss your knuckles before you punch me in the face)

Sorry for professing my undying love for you. Can we go back to just being two dudes who flirt with each other in a really funny, totally one-hundred-percent platonic way? I’m sorry for telling you I thought you looked kissable tonight. When I first met you I fell hard. You’re the reason we got together and the reason we broke up. (Not really. That had more to do with being left on read for weeks.) When you don’t answer I get scared. I even started checking the obituaries by Day Four. I’ve never believed in anything as strongly as I believe you in you. This is love, and it’s bitter. It’s sour, and it’s awful, and it’s ugly, but I’ve felt it in my bones for two years now, so I know it won’t just go away. You’re the rhythm guitar in my heart. I asked you to join my band just so you’d always be there. Even if you can hardly play, you’re still my first choice. I want you with me for the rest of my life. I hope you don’t see this shit. I think I’d die. Well, this is the part where I admit I’m tired cause it’s two a.m. and I’m probably sick again. Goodnight. 

–S.S. (yours)

‘‘Get Busy Living (In The Purgatory Of Your Real Life)’’

Once upon a time, I was a young boy. Born under a nighttime haze. With skin of stardust and tears like burning oil. A soul so bright nothing could damper it.

Now my soul is full of pallor. And my skin is grey. I have memories formed of the harshest sunlit days and the coldest moonshine nights. I could only grow into the threadbare skin they gave me.

~

I think back to nothing fond at all. These days the darkest parts of my brain are put together like a jigsaw puzzle filled with missing pieces and misplaced optimism. 

He is my only light. A boy just like me but infinitely more perfect. Beautiful, confident, sewn together with golden threads. Clean and pure. The antithesis of everything I've become.

‘’Get busy living’’, they tell me. But how am I supposed to live if he's not here to pave the trail ahead of me with his golden, elegant glow? You’d understand if you ever stood in the full glory of his love. Without him, it's not living, not really. It’s only a day-by-day slideshow, built to exist and li[v]e. 

~

I pale in comparison to all that he is. (He is the best part of me.) My blood is motor oil and my scars are rust. My features are burns against untainted, snow white flesh. I was made for the purpose of art, yet I have become what I always feared was the ugliest part of me. 

My soul is corrosive. It’s eating me from the inside out. Bones break and hearts shatter. But I’ll serve my broken body on a silver platter, in the hopes that he will take me as I am. That he will accept what little I have to offer.

~

He’s made me that boy again. The person I lost over the years. (Could I finally start to live?) The sky is full once more, lit up with the light of ten thousand galaxies. He is the man in the moon, watching over me even when he's not standing beside me.

~

My heart beats in time again. The stars align and I’m given back the matches that gave me that flicker to begin with. A small fire starts up in my ribcage, and I think that maybe I’ll have a bright light leading my way once again. Something to keep me warm and to give my soul back its glow. Stardust skin and the feeling that I’ll never be alone