I Just Realized That Nothing Is Real So Therefore I Will Not Try In Life Anymore

LOVESICK.

— a masterlist containing works of bully!haikyuu boys.

the works below contain dark content (dubcon + more to be added), please heed warnings before reading.

all characters in these works are 18+

there’s no set dates/order for these to come out.

list is subject to change! characters can be added and/or removed.

MINORS DNI WITH THESE.

SUNA RINTAROU — CRYBABY.

includes. dubcon/noncon-ish, virginity loss, degradation, slight dacryphilia, fingering, squirting, unprotected penetration, tad bit of hair-pulling, semi-public sex

SAKUSA KIYOOMI — KISS LATER.

includes. dubcon, virginity loss, foot/shoe humping, no prep, unprotected penetration, creampie, semi-public sex, messy, degradation

AKAASHI KEIJI — ONE & ONLY.

includes. slight bully!akaashi, vbc manager!reader, dubcon, fingering, unprotected + creampie, virginity loss, degradation, slight manipulation

MIYA ATSUMU — EGOIST.

includes. (past) bully!atsumu, bullying, harassment , angst, fluff, enemies to lovers

© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2021. do not repost or change.

“my arm is going to lose circulation if you keep doing that.”

tsukishima glares—or attempts to—at you and scoffs. of course you won’t budge. “it’s not going anywhere, can you let go please?”

you pout, displeased with your boyfriend’s comment. you haven’t seen him all day and only 30 minutes ago had you entered his apartment. needless to say, you currently cling to him like a koala.

he wrangles himself free of your grasp, relieved for his lungs and limbs. walking over to your shared closet—really just his clothes you steal—he rummages before finding something and tossing it your way. “here’s a sweatshirt. that make you feel better?”

you feel your frustration spill over and look at him with a frown. “that’s not the same thing!” you cry, tossing the clothing aside, “why would i want that when you’re right here?”

he blinks, glaring at the sight of your small tantrum. “hey, chill out.” he flicks your forehead before kissing the very spot.

he becomes silent, knowing he can’t argue with your logic. for once, you actually have a very valid point. and maybe, just maybe tsukishima likes when you’re clingy.

you sniffle, watching him settle back at his desk. you’re prepared to go and slip the sweatshirt on but you’re stopped when he softly calls your name.

“come here.” he scoots his chair back and pats his lap.

you stare at him with wide eyes, and wait for someone to pinch you. to wake you up from your dream.

tsukishima blushes a light red, the color spreading through his cheeks and the tips of his ears. “i’m going to retract my offer in a minute if you don’t hurry up.” he threatens, and you can tell he’s flustered by the way he awkwardly has his arms open.

you practically leap into his lap, and he grunts softly at the impact. another blush creeps up his neck and you plant several kisses on his skin. he adjusts you so your legs wrap around his waist as he sits in the chair.

“is that better now?” he asks, his voice rumbling against you at a frequency you know and love.

you curl impossibly further into him. “much better now.” a pleased hum leaves you and you smile.

you hear kei humming a song you recognize as one from your shared playlist and you become elated. he’s not the best singer, but he only really ever hums or sings when he’s around you, and nothing can beat the feeling of being special.

one of kei’s hand slip up your lower back and he rubs small circles up your spine. the gesture makes you drowsy, and you feel yourself begin to fall asleep.

when kei feels the weight of your head on his chest, he almost says your name before he looks down. his heart swells when he sees you fast asleep, hands gripping onto his t-shirt. you look so…peaceful in his hold and he’s glad that no one else but him can hold you like this. see you like this. never in a million years would he want to see you in someone else’s arms.

he smiles, carefully shifting you in his hold so that he can still work. his large hand cradles the back of your head before he presses several kisses to your forehead, his silent way of showing how grateful he is for you. of being able to have you and cherish you and love you like he should.

after awhile he decides to take a break. he picks you in his arms before he moves to your shared bed. he hears you call his name, your voice small and confused.

kei carefully slides in next to you, hushing you quietly. “it’s okay. you’re okay, sweet girl. just go back to sleep. i’m right here.” he says softly, pulling you on top of his chest.

“m‘kay.” you mumble, closing your eyes again.

and you’re sure you’re not hallucinating but if you weren’t so drowsy, you could clearly hear kei mumble ‘love you’ before you fall back asleep.

do not copy and or repost. likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated though! (c) 2022 hyeque

─── 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄

+ sae x f!reader | wc 5.3k

notes: i’m in love with this man, and wrote this on a whim :’) hope y’all like it !! feedback & reblogs are greatly appreciated !! <3

summary: you’ve known sae since you were both sixteen. he’s always dreamed of going overseas and facing the world, will he ever be ready to come home?

𝐒𝐈𝐗𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

sae can read almost everyone flawlessly, you included.

he’s not close to you, not at all. physically? yes, because you’re his seat partner. but in all other aspects? no, definitely not.

you’re scared of him, he can tell. whenever he moves, you get self-conscious, immediately pulling your own chair in, giving him way. then you check on him as he moves away, because you’re scared that somehow you’ve managed to offend him.

you never did. because to offend sae, you’d need to be someone who can even bother him in the first place.

sae doesn’t care about what you do though, he just happens to notice you. out of convenience, because he sees you every monday to friday and sits next to you for every class.

it’s the same routine thing every week—you sit next to each other, barely say a word all day and then before he knows it, it’s the end of school day.

it doesn’t even matter. you don’t matter.

nobody really does.

he peeks at you out of the corner of his eyes, your eyes peering down at your paper with the utmost concentration. he quickly looks away though, because the last thing he wants is to get caught and be labeled as a cheater on a history quiz. especially when he’s not cheating.

yeah, you really don’t matter.

𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

soccer, soccer, soccer.

that’s all sae can think of nowadays. just do whatever he can to improve his skills, everything else is up for debate.

you’re still his seatmate, still ever so distant. he gives you credit though, for greeting him every morning now even though you look terrified and nervous all the time.

“good morning.”

today is no exception. sae’s eyes flick up to you and then back down to his desk, and that’s all of the acknowledgement you get, as usual. it’s nothing personal, he just doesn’t want to get into small talk at all.

but he’ll give you points for trying, even if he doesn’t exactly know what’s going through your head right now. somehow, he can’t read you as well anymore.

that’s how you usually are now, the newer version of you. a little more upbeat, a little friendlier, less awkward but still as shy as he first pegged you to be.

well, now you’re just slightly more amusing. somehow, sae starts to find himself wondering how you’d react to different situations.

it’s almost the middle of the school year and you’d kept up with your usual greetings everyday. sae keeps up with his usual stoic demeanour on his part.

until today.

“good morning!” you’re extra chirpy today, he notices.

sae blinks at you once, twice, and you’re still smiling at him, and he’d like to know whether you’re still that same nervous mess inside, so he opens his mouth this time.

“morning, y/n.”

simple, easy, basic courtesy.

but somehow you’re looking at him as though he’s a fucking freak.

to be fair, that’s exactly what he expected. but it’s now been a whole minute and you’re still staring dumbly at him.

“what?”

you shake your head, laughing sheepishly as you take your seat beside him, “nothing, it’s just… you never bothered talking to me before.”

sae shrugs, because it’s not like he bothers now, per se. he’s just—what’s the word—bored? “i can shut up too if you prefer that.”

“no!”

you look so embarrassed by your quick outburst that sae almost snickers. that’s the most reaction you’ve nearly managed to get out of him yet.

“i mean,” you stutter, looking for the right words to say, and maybe sae is getting a little bit of an ego boost right now because he can tell you’re flustered. “you’re pretty terrifying most of the time so…”

he knows what you mean, but he acts like he doesn’t. “oh, so you like terrifying? okay, i can do that.”

the way your face instantly switches to a straight expression is fucking amusing, and for a split second his guard falls and you get to hear him snicker.

luckily, the bell rings right after and mr hayato is never late. sae never got to hear what you thought of that.

every single day after that passes by a little bit easier, your non-friendship inching a little closer together, sae might even consider you an acquaintance now.

he converses with you a lot more fluidly (as much as he allows himself to—he doesn’t like you being too comfortable, likes to keep you on your toes), and he finds himself teaching you things he notices you’re absolutely horrible at.

like logarithms, because no matter how much you try to wrap your head around it, you refuse to ask anyone for help. you’re a little stubborn, but sae can live with that, just has to speak to you in a way that doesn’t seem like you look like you need help.

“no, you’re forgetting that the log of e is always one, there, see?” sae sighs as he explains, because you’re quite muddle-headed. “it’ll be much easier once you get all the definitions in your head.”

“were you born a genius or something?” you ask innocently upon catching his test scores. a 94 out of 100, compared to your 63.

that day, neither of you notice the fact that other people are beginning to notice your growing friendship.

sae starts tutoring you whenever he can, because apparently you’re hopeless without his help. (he says this to your face. he’s always straight with you.) and then he finds himself noticing you in ways he never did before.

how you look absolutely angelic when the sun hits your face. he notices the way you puff out your cheeks when you’re thinking hard. even the perfume that wafts through the air. you smell good.

this is ridiculous.

“hun, do you want any—”

fuck. sae’s head whips around to see an older woman at your door, almost a carbon copy of you, eyes wide as her gaze falls onto him.

no, he’s not particularly nervous or feels like he should be, but something tells you if your mother is anything like you, she’d misunderstand. this is just a lot more trouble than it’s worth. you’re a lot more trouble than it’s worth. what’s he even getting out of tutoring you?

“oh hi there! and who might you be?”

he can see stars in her eyes, all hopeful and excited as she shifts her gaze between you and sae and back to you again.

“mom! he’s no one—” ouch, he’s tutoring you and you introduce him as no one? “a friend and he’s tutoring me for some math stuff so could you…?”

it’s like the gears are turning in your mother’s head when she eyes sae knowingly. god, he has to do some damage control. don’t want either of you expecting anything much out of him.

“i’m itoshi sae,” he introduces himself, shaking her hand. “i just make time to tutor some of my classmates to earn extra credit.”

not even close to true, but neither of you need to know that. he’d much rather spend his free time getting in some training or going to the gym but he decided maybe he could spend a few hours out of today to help your dumbass with numbers.

he’s an expert at sidestepping small talk and in no time at all, your mother’s out of the room. you still seem embarrassed, he can feel the heat emanating from your cheeks.

“concentrate,” sae sighs, and he wonders why he’s even doing this for you. he’d rather go home right now, he thinks, maybe kick the ball around with rin, or just lie down in bed because waking up at 4am to train every morning is taking its toll.

you mumble a hushed apology and rub the sleepiness from your eyes. the both of you had been at this for a couple of hours now, maybe looking at numbers too much is making you tired too.

sae acknowledges you’re a fast learner though, if you have a proper teacher. he’s not surprised that ms kina’s teachings are lost on you—she’s not that good at explaining concepts. sae is, though. he usually doesn’t bother sharing but hey, maybe now is just a glitch in the matrix, maybe now he’s just trying to do good samaritan things and help you out so you don’t fail the damn midterm test.

“okay then, see you,” he says, picking up his bag and slinging it around his shoulders, only to have you grab his wrist. “what?”

you look a little bashful once you realise what you did, and then you let go of him immediately. you look like you really want to say something, but you don’t, you just shake your head.

don’t do it, don’t do it, don’t do it.

sae’s putting his bag back down before he knows it, and he groans internally. “say it.”

“if-if you don’t mind, maybe we could schedule a tutoring session every week?” you’re so, so timid and so, so soft.

he blinks once, twice, realising what you actually mean to say. you don’t want the tutoring session, apart from logarithms you’re fine with pure numbers, but you want time. with him.

it boosts his ego a little, if he’s being honest.

“i’m too busy with my soccer trainings,” he tells you, nonchalant until he sees how quick your expression falls and then he has to hate himself for continuing, “i have some time on friday evenings though.”

like a puppy, you’re instantly chirpy again, saying how maybe he could tutor you after he’s done with whatever stuff, and how you’d get a head start and grab some seats at a cafe or something.

you’re both seventeen when your weekly tutoring sessions start. it’s beyond himself why he agreed. all he knows is that he doesn’t particularly like being the reason your expression goes sad.

first week in, you’re still too nervous, too jumpy.

the second week, you’re a little too full of nonsense, daring to laugh at him, or with him, depending.

by the fifth week, your bare arm is already brushing his and you’re not even flinching.

you’re both seventeen when sae realises that maybe he cares for you. in the way lovers do. in the way he gets you to walk on the safer side of the sidewalk. in the way he sends you home every friday. in the way he actually responds to your goodnight texts and wakes up waiting for your good morning.

in the way he listens when you tell him that your mother is actually sick, that you want to take care of her. that your dream is simple—to find your passion one day, and to be able to earn enough to let your mother live peacefully, to help her fight whatever she has to because you don’t want her to be alone.

in the way, for the first time in his life, he reaches out to you, putting his hand on top of yours as he lets you cry on his shoulder.

your birthday falls on a friday this year, and he tells you not to bring your books that day in class. you look at him with pure shock, but then quickly adjust yourself and bring up a grateful smile.

“yes, sir.”

that night he meets you up on the rooftop of your complex, in the middle of the carpark, and you’ve never looked any happier than you did when you saw him holding that petite round galaxy cake in his hands, the sparkler candles so pretty in the night.

“happy birthday.”

𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

the next school year starts and sae enters into it still close to you as ever. you haven’t met in just over a month, what with sae’s intense training camps and your family holiday. but the both of you still talk to each other daily, and he finds himself waiting for your response every night.

it’s like the both of you are in a relationship, but neither of you are saying anything about it. whatever this relationship-non-relationship is, sae thinks he likes it.

but it’s barely three months into the school year and sae has to break your heart.

“it’s the opportunity of a lifetime, i’m sure you understand right?” his coach rambles on, disgusting with how he’s talking with his mouth full and chips keep falling out of it.

sae nods, because he does. he’s almost sure he’ll go for it. it’s not everyday kids from japan get offered a spot to play for a european club.

“great! so let’s get your parents involved and get you to spain.”

“yeah, sure.”

it’s frustrating how he’s not more excited. it’s there, but it’s faint, because it’s lingering on the traces of his feelings for you. he’s never really thought this far, and maybe that was his fault. he’ll keep that in mind; he can’t risk this situation again. he can’t risk getting your hopes up and being the reason that they’ll never recover.

minimise damage, yeah, that’s what he has to do.

you go from talking endlessly in class to being quiet because sae is trying to concentrate. you go from meeting every friday outside of school to every other friday, to once every month, to none at all. you go from texting a good morning and a goodnight every day to barely getting responses from sae, barely ever even get your messages read.

then one day sae just doesn’t show up to school at all. and you finally hear that he’s been scouted for a club in spain, that he’s going to be away for god knows how long. and then you realise that maybe that’s why he’s been distant lately, because you refuse to believe that the sae who took so much time out of his busy schedule for you, the sae who made the effort to buy you a birthday cake and spend all night on the carpark just listening to you talk on and on about insignificant things because you were nervous, the sae who you fell in love with—you refuse to believe it wasn’t real.

that’s why you hold your hopes up and ride your bicycle to his house, which you’ve been to once before, just outside though, because you’d asked him where he lived and he finally obliged. it’s still beautiful as ever, neat garden lined with flowers and a soccer field in the back.

when you knock on the gate, you see a familiar face come out; it’s itoshi rin, his younger brother. you only know that because sae’s spoken about him a few times, and you saw a picture of the both of them together on his phone.

“oh, um, hi, who are you?” rin asks, cautiously, because evidently, he’s never seen you.

“uh, i’m one of sae’s… classmates,” you decide, and it stings that you realise you can’t even say that anymore. how did it all spiral from cloud nine? “is he home?”

rin blinks a few times. his lower lashes are slightly longer than sae’s, he’s carrying a soccer ball, and you just know he’s been training all day because he’s sweating from head to toe. sae has said rin wanted to be a striker just like him.

“oh, didn’t you hear? my big bro got scouted, he left for spain last night.”

it shouldn’t be this upsetting—he isn’t even your boyfriend. no matter how much you wanted him to be. he was just… someone you studied with, spent time with, made efforts for.

but something forms in the pit of your stomach when you hear that sae’s already gone, that he’s already halfway to spain without even saying goodbye, without giving you any warning.

you’d thought whatever friendship you had with him was worth more than a silent goodbye, than a one-sided decision.

“o-oh, okay, thanks!”

you bolt off before rin can say anything else, it’s better that no one can see you crying anyway.

that night once you’ve sort of calmed down, you open up sae’s message thread, which as of late is mostly a string of messages from you and sae only replying with oh or i see or i’m busy.

the last time he even bothered replying to you was last week when you asked if he wanted to watch a movie together and he said a simple no.

“you’re an ass, itoshi sae,” you cry to yourself as you bring up the keyboard on your phone, your tears falling onto the screen.

i hate you, itoshi sae.

𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍

soccer is the same; thrilling, tiring, demanding.

it’s been a year since he left japan and he’s still surviving, still thriving, still being revered as a genius midfielder. sae knows he has what it takes to bring victory to a good enough team, that’s what he came here for anyway—to be the best in the world.

“good job out there, sae,” the captain claps him on the back, but sae’s mind isn’t there.

it’s been a year since he left japan and he still pulls up the last message you ever sent him.

i hate you, itoshi sae.

perhaps it’s good that you do. there’s no place for your dreams in spain, or anywhere else in the world except for japan. you need to move on from him. maybe you already did, from what he hears from his classmates who still check in on him from time to time.

the first time sae hears about how some other guy asked you out, he can’t say he doesn’t care. but he’s relinquished his right to be jealous, so he barely responds to the news.

but maybe he’s beginning to see where he fucked up, because he shouldn’t have gotten close to you in the first place, should’ve just left you alone.

instead now he’s left with this sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. is this how it feels like to really miss someone?

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘

you’re now in college and you’re past whatever happened in high school. itoshi sae still lingers in the crevices of your mind, with his teal eyes and his pretty lashes and the way his hand felt when they were on top of yours.

some part of you thinks you’d never get over him, but you have to make peace with that. just because he never bothered to give you closure doesn’t mean he should be allowed to ruin your life.

besides, you’re pretty sure he read what you last sent him. there’s really nothing else for you to do if he doesn’t even bother talking to you.

you’d been trying to properly move on anyway, and that’s exactly what you try to do later that night, after accepting ryusei shido’s invitation to dinner.

he’s like the opposite of sae, though. he’s all expressive and goofy and wild because he’s got you trespassing on private property just to borrow their garden and he likes to drive fast, really fast, because he loves the wind in his hair.

if you had met him first, you’d probably be in love with the rush he gives you, the adrenaline pumping through your veins. when he kissed you, if only you didn’t have itoshi sae in your head, then maybe you’d have kissed him back.

when you’re twenty, you find out that maybe you can’t move on without giving itoshi sae a piece of your mind.

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐎𝐍𝐄

sae’s career has been rapidly progressing, he’s part of the starting team and is hailed as one of the world’s up-and-coming top soccer stars.

the earlier game cemented it.

his team won, with the commentators naming him as the most valuable player, assisting in all the goals scored by his team.

when he’s pulled aside for an interview, he can’t help but wonder whether you’d be watching through the television, hanging on his every word. or maybe you’d already moved on with this shido guy he hears about.

fuck that shido guy.

and when an interviewer asks whether there’s anyone special in his life that motivates him, he finds himself wishing he could say your name.

“nothing of that sort.”

interviews pass by quickly, as they always do for him because he’s not much of an interview guy, with his stoic expressions and lacklustre responses. he’s on the way back to the locker room when he hears a familiar voice calling out to him.

“sae!”

he spins around to find his mother and father there, surprising him. they must’ve heard he was playing and booked a flight out. rin’s not here though.

“rin’s busy with some soccer matches of his own back at home,” his father explains, as if he read his mind. “he couldn’t make it, but he’s surely watching the match from home.”

how silly of sae to have wished that it was you calling out to him, for that split second. you’re still in his head, and that’s annoying.

“oh! sweetheart,” his mother coos after she’s done gushing over his game, “we ran into one of your friends earlier! what’s her name—ah wait there she is!”

sae furrows his brows, following his mother’s gaze and finds you there, hugging the walls, sheepishly waving your hand at him. he’s starting to doubt his vision, maybe you’re just his imagination, maybe his mother’s looking at someone else.

“hey, sae,” you greet him, mellow and polite.

he’s still standing there like he’s the one who’s starstruck, like you’re the famous one. are you really here?

“what are you doing here?”

not the best greeting, but that’s the most he can muster when he hasn’t seen or heard from you in over three years.

you smile, and he thinks he might melt, but he doesn’t because he’s just told—lied to—the world that there’s no one special to him.

“what’s wrong with supporting one of my friends?” you say, as though this is a neighbourhood soccer match and you didn’t have to fly halfway across the world for it.

“itoshi! get in here!” by the sound of his voice, it’s the captain talking. sae doesn’t even want to take his eyes off of you, but he has to.

“go,” you tell him, “i’m staying near the airport, if, uh, you wanted to do anything afterwards.”

does he?

sae swallows the lump in his throat and nods. “yeah, okay.”

that night, he figures out which hotel you’re staying at and pays you a visit—it annoys him how fast his heart is beating and how your sudden presence threatens to mess up his life.

he knocks on your door, and you open it, beaming at him when you see him. “i thought we were meeting at the restaurant,” you say as you let him in, closing the door behind him.

“i was just passing by, sent my parents to the airport and thought i would just drop by,” he answers, lying through his teeth. his parents are still somewhere in spain and he just wanted to see you sooner, that’s all.

“well, i’m still getting ready,” you tell him, straightening your dress and looking at yourself in the mirror.

how is it possible you keep getting prettier everyday? your hair’s a little longer now, and you look more mature, you’ve learned to do makeup, and your dress hugs your body in just the right places. he’s cursing himself for staring at you.

“i thought you’d be too busy to come out with me tonight, honestly,” you confess, putting on some lipstick.

sae has to look away, “and i thought you hated me.”

that has you stopping in your tracks; this conversation happened earlier than you expected, but you’d been gunning for this all the same.

“yeah, well you left japan without saying a word to me, like i was just anyone else.”

he understands why you’d think that. that was what he was going for anyway, and it reminds him what he should be doing instead of entertaining you right now. sae should be rejecting you, you and your efforts, should turn away from you like you’re another one of his fangirls.

“why?”

but the shakiness in your voice takes him off guard.

“why what?”

“why didn’t you say anything?”

“i didn’t have to,” sae responds, simply, like he doesn’t owe you a damn thing.

“was i imagining it?” you ask, finally turning around and looking him in his eyes.

no, no you weren’t.

“i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“then why are you here, sae?” you burst out, and he stills in his position, feet glued to the floor. “you wouldn’t give a second thought to people you don’t care about, so what now?”

“i was just taking an old friend out to dinner, that’s all.”

he’s stubborn, so so stubborn. he’s hoping he’ll hold out.

“i don’t get you,” you mutter softly, to yourself or to him, he doesn’t even fucking know.

sae really shouldn’t, but he thinks about how he might never see you again and tries, “what do you want?”

“what are you talking about?”

“do you know what you want?” sae turns it around on you. “you flew halfway across the world to get here, for what? for me?”

he’s intimidating when he speaks a little louder than usual, and you shrink back just slightly.

“i-i wanted to talk to you,” you try your hardest to form an excuse but it’s not working.

“and what did you want out of that?”

you fall flat, and you feel like giving up. you know the answer, but you don’t want to admit it. you don’t want to tell him that you wanted him to want you too, you don’t want to admit that you’ve been thinking about him nearly all the time and what could’ve been.

“just forget it,” you relent, averting your gaze, but the next moment you feel an unfamiliar sensation on your lips, the taste of his on yours.

sae doesn’t know why he’s doing it, but his body moves on its own; something he got from playing that manages to bleed into his daily life, apparently.

you taste so much better than he expected, and you feel like you belong in his arms, like you’re made for him because there’s absolutely no one else in the whole fucking world who could ever bring itoshi sae to his knees.

he’s been in denial all this time, yes, and he’s tired of it. if you came all the way here, he’s not wasting it. he pulls away from you, absolutely dazed by the wanting look in your eyes.

you’re twenty one years old when you first hear itoshi sae telling you he loves you.

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐓𝐖𝐎

“someone’s chirpy,” your mother says from the couch, looking up from her ipad. “i sense… a date with sae.”

you roll your eyes, throwing one of the cushions at her. “mom, shut up,” you groan, still embarrassed whenever she calls you out for it.

sae’s still in spain most of the time, but the both of you make it work. you make a point to video call at least twice a week, and he responds to you like a normal boyfriend does. it’s back to that good morning, goodnight love you shared back in high school. he makes as much time as he can, and you appreciate him for it.

“i’m glad you’re happy, sweetie,” she tells you, and you smile gratefully.

you’re more than relieved now that she’s managed to fight the cancer off. it’s the only reason she pushed you to go see sae last year. you technically wouldn’t have done it without her.

a knock on your door signals that he’s here, and your mom gives you a knowing look before she excuses herself to her room.

when you open the front door, you feel a burst of excitement when you see sae there holding a bouquet of flowers.

“happy birthday, pretty.”

even when he’s busy, even when he’s swamped, he’ll never stop making you feel like you’re on top of the world.

both of you are twenty-two when sae decides that you’re his world.

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄

this is the year you find out long distance is actually really really hard.

sometimes sae loses the match, and sometimes he can’t separate friend from foe from you. he gets frustrated, and so you do too. he has less than kind words when he’s venting, and you happen to be on the receiving end.

sometimes you get stressed from your finals projects, and you push him away, and sae leaves you to it. sae doesn’t check up on you as much as you’d like to, and you’re a little too stubborn to tell him that you mind.

sometimes sae would get interviewed and would have to address dating rumours, whether it’s the upcoming supermodel from america or that renowned sexy sports photographer from brazil—it’s hard not to get jealous, especially when you’re kept private.

you can’t blame him for that, not when everyone likes to send hate to the pretty girl he’s supposedly dating.

this is also where you find out that itoshi sae knows you better than anyone. it’s where he always leaves you a reminder he loves you, even when you’re fighting. it’s where he sends you a goodnight text even when you’ve hung up the phone hours ago in anger. it’s where he keeps japan in his weather app just so he can tell you not to be a klutz and fall down when it’s raining. it’s where he declares on international television that no, he’s not available but that’s none of their business.

even if you yearn for him to be next to you at times, sae’s off doing what he’s always wanted to do, and you’re not going to let yourself be a burden—so you do what you want to do, because the last thing you want the headlines to blast is the fact that itoshi sae’s girlfriend is a good-for-nothing.

twenty-three is the age where you start writing articles for a local magazine company, where you take lead on fashion articles while occasionally helping with the sports section.

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑

both of your careers are in full flight.

so is your relationship.

sae’s always proud of you, of your achievements, of your efforts even if they didn’t bear fruit. you’re doing so well, making yourself a name in Japan with your articles, with your wonderful insights and funny wit.

he always reads your articles, tells his assistant to get a subscription on the magazine and send it to sae’s hotel, always reads the articles you write. he doesn’t tell you about that though. doesn’t want you getting a big head.

and every time you talk on the phone about your articles and how hard it was to write or how you’re afraid people will take it the wrong way, he acts like he doesn’t even know which article you’re talking about. (he absolutely does.)

“hey, when’s my contract ending again?”

sae’s assistant looks up from his ipad from his seat across him on the private jet. he blinks twice before rifling through his different folders.

“oh, next year.”

a ghost of a smile appears on sae’s face and his assistant thinks he’s hallucinating.

“good.”

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄

sae is twenty-five years old when he finally decides he’s ready to come home.

it makes the headlines—how he quit the club and refused to play for them anymore, the reason being that he wants to go back to his roots.

back to you.

because now, at your front door, after he knocks once, twice, and you open it, surprised, sae’s never been more sure that he’s making the right decision.

after all, you’re the only one in the world capable of bringing itoshi sae to his knee.

“will you marry me?”

#fly high hinata

hey im new here does hinata live at the end of hq?

during the olympics oikawa spikes a ball directly into his head using his full force, killing him instantly.

Kiss 'N Run —꒱

You run away after you kiss them

Rin - the stoic expression doesn’t change as he chases after you…terrifying as fuck if you ask me. Grabs you by the bicep and slams his chest into your back—keeping you there with his arms tightly wrapped around you. “Why’d you run?” there is a hint of sadness in his tone but you couldn’t help the shiver that ran up your spine and stopped at your nape. He presses soft kisses from your neck to your shoulder.

Sae - “Oh…” stares at your back, dumbfounded, and not knowing what the hell just happened. Doesn’t chase or ask why you ran, he goes on with his day like nothing happened (dw he’ll make sure you are kissed good when you’re alone with him.)

Oliver - Runs after you after yelling, “no running in the halls.” Fucking hypocrite. The widest grin on his lips when he catches you (kicks you to the floor*) He cages you under him and chuckles bc he finds you too fucking cute. Kills you with his kisses and hickeys.

Shidou - how are you gonna try running when his hand is already on your neck and squeezing so tightly? Do you wanna die or something? If you somehow manage to run, he thinks you’re so fucking hilarious…you better start praying for your ass to be saved later bc he’s not gonna let you off easily.

Barou - as soon as you turn on your heel, his big hand is on your hair and he is pulling you back to him to smash your lips on his for a kiss so deep, you think your knees melted and you’re unable to stand anymore. “No running from the king,” he says before pinning you against the wall.

All are aged up.

© kenruu

— SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK

synopsis: despite being hopelessly in love with you, atsumu miya wants nothing but for you to stay as far away from him as possible

pairing: atsumu miya x gn!reader

genre: angst, unrequited/one sided love

warnings: one swear word n uhh hearbreak 

word count: 883

❝ i don’t want a friend (just one more night)

i want my life in two (my life in two) ❞

He may not show it, but one of the many things Atsumu wanted was to share his life with someone. Specifically, a loved one. Ever since childhood, he dreamt of the two of you growing up, sharing fond memories together the older you got. Having a happy ending together, and not regretting a single bit of your lives once you died. 

He wanted to share everything, both good and bad, with you. He wanted you to be able to say “look! That’s my boyfriend! I love him so much”.

Of course, not everyone is lucky enough to be blessed with a cheerful story full of chocolate, flowers and other sweet things. 

Keep reading

“GONNA SHOW HIM YOU’RE MINE.”

WINDBREAKER BOYS + LOVE BITES. ft. togame jo, hayato suo, kaji ren, sakura haruka, & umemiya hajime x f!reader

filled request: “Can I request for umemiya, sakura, suo, and kaji where they see reader with another guy friend and they get jealous because the guy is being flirty and obviously trying to make moves but reader is dense so then the boys give reader a hickey for the first time to show that reader is taken??”

mdni ! suggestive. 1.5K WC ; added togame ! :>

TOGAME JO. pet name ‘doll’ used!

“him again?”

you adjust the straps of your top before twisting and turning to get a better look at your outfit. “mhm,” you hum in response, “said he needed help asking someone out today. i’m gonna help pick the flowers.”

togame's eyes narrow a bit at the obvious intent of your friend. it didn’t help that you really didn't have a single clue in the world, and on top of your obliviousness— you're dressed so cute.

the combination was just a recipe for disaster, and he wants to finally put an end to it today.

“ah— what are you doing?” you yelp when he suddenly tugs at your wrist, pulling you off balance as you stumble and fall onto his lap. his arm comes to loop around your waist before you can even stabilize yourself, hugging you tight against his chest.

“togame, let go,” you whine, “i’m gonna be late!”

“don't wanna.”

the casualty of his tone makes your eyebrow twitch. he almost sounds bored with how slow the words come out of his mouth, and despite that fact, his arm doesn’t seem to budge at all when you try and push against him.

“plus…..” he’s choosing to ignore your efforts to move him— or he just doesn’t notice them in the first place, “you don’t need to meet with a guy like that anyway.”

“and why is that?” you retort, arms crossing in frustration as you give up and resort to simply glaring back at your boyfriend. "..are you jealous?"

"course i am, doll" he lulls, fingers pulling your top’s strap out of the way before his lips attach themselves to the side of your neck, sucking at the skin as you shiver. his hand tilts your jaw to the side, giving him the space he needs to better suckle and kiss your neck.

you can’t help the little noise that slips out when he releases the skin with a loud pop, exhaling deeply against you before peppering kisses beside the dark mark he's given you.

“can't stand when guys are tryna get at what's mine.”

HAYATO SUO.

“that friend of yours..” suo coos against the shell of your ear, “really likes you, doesn’t he?”

he's looming right over you, his familiar smile looking a little different today when his arms are caging you right beneath him, and you suck in a sharp breath when he leans down, tassel earrings tickling the sensitive skin of your neck.

“h-huh? he does?” your voice comes out a little breathless from the way his lips are just barely hovering over your skin.

“he does. you couldn't tell?”

in any other situation, he would think your innocence would be endearing. but after watching your friend get all close to you like that, holding your hair up and then fixing your necklace for you— he couldn't help it. a part of him is thankful for how steady his voice comes out, because you'd never be able to guess that just below his calm exterior- he was absolutely fuming with jealousy.

“no, i didn't know,” you whisper, “but you know i would've turned him down if he said anything-”

“i can help with that,” he interrupts, tone sweet and soothing. he plants a kiss just below your ear, his breath grazing your ear, and it sends a shiver straight down your spine.

“h-how?” you squeak.

you can feel him smile against you before his hand comes to tilt your head to the side, exposing more of your neck for him. “just like this,” he whispers before he's taking a sharp inhale, lips latching onto you as he sucks harshly.

the noise that comes out of you riles him up even more. he's sucking harder before he even realizes, calm demeanor crumbling just a bit when he hears the noises you’re making just for him.

you think you felt his teeth graze your neck for a second when he releases the skin, pulling back a bit to admire the mark he’s left on your neck.

"it's a good idea, right? turn your head the other way for me now."

KAJI REN. calls you ‘my girl.’

“w-what's wrong, kaji?” you manage to stammer between kisses, “you're a lot rougher today— something on your mind?”

he pulls back a bit when your hands tug at his hair, a part of him content when he sees the way your lips are slightly swollen, your mouth parted to catch your breath as your chest rises up and down from the intensity.

there was a lot on his mind, but marking you up was at the forefront of his brain. he could already tell that only kissing you just wasn’t gonna cut it after all that’s happened today.

“‘s fine,” he mutters before he’s back on top of you, his lips roughly latching onto the skin just beneath your collarbone, sucking at the skin as you gasp above him. “oh- t-that feels good,” your voice comes out as a breathy sigh, “are you… mad still?”

“mad at that friend of yours,” he growls against your skin, pressing a quick kiss onto the mark until he's moving onto another part of your neck, lips hovering just below your ear. “he was tryna get at my girl right in front of me.”

“i'm sure he wasn't— ah!” you gasp when his arms wrap around your middle, pulling you flush against his body as he tilts his head to better nestle into the crook of your neck.

“got me pissed off just seeing him looking at you like that,” his teeth graze against your skin when he sucks particularly hard, “gonna make sure he’ll get a nice and close look at these next time.”

SAKURA HARUKA.

kissing sakura is much, much different today.

he’s rough— hands trailing along your back, sending an shiver straight down your spine as he deepens the kiss, breaths mingling with urgency. the way he’s kissing you so desperately today has little gasps escaping your lips, which do nothing but encourage him to touch you more.

"f-fuck," he gasps between kisses, pulling back to inhale sharply before your fingers come to tangle in his hair, pulling him right back into you.

“someone's in a bad mood.” you giggle, and he scoffs in response, a dusting of pink over his cheeks. “‘m not mad.”

"you sure? what's got you so worked up?"

and he hates that he doesn't know. he doesn't know what this feeling is, so he has no idea how to get rid of it. all he knows is that it didn't feel nice when he saw your friend all up over you.

it should've been him instead— he thinks. and all he wants now is to have you.

your breath hitches in your throat when his lips begin to trace a path down your neck, pressing wet kisses between each inch of skin. “i don't know,” he admits through a deep blush, “just want…this.”

just thinking about the earlier events makes his blood boil again, and it shows in his next kiss. he accidentally sucks at your neck for a moment, and a lewd moan slips right through your lips.

your hand slaps over your mouth a moment too late, and he freezes in place, deep blush spreading to his ears at the sound. he’s never heard you never make that noise before.

"d-don't stop, sakura,” you urge, tugging at his hair, “feels good.”

he pulls back a bit to roughly shake his head, shake off the irritating blush before his eyes finally flicker towards the subtle mark he’s left on your skin. it’s a deep shade of purple, and something about it makes him feral— it scratches at the itch he’s had all day.

he doesn’t think he’ll be stopping anytime soon, at least.

“f-fine,” he growls, “turn your head.”

UMEMIYA HAJIME.

umemiya sighs when your phone buzzes again, the sound catching your attention as you scroll to check your messages again. you're leaning back against ume's chest when you open it, letting him rest his head on your shoulder with a dramatic pout.

"he's tryna steal you away from me," he whines, arms hugging tightly around your core. "s no fair."

how you were able to reduce bofurin's strongest— the one standing at a staggering 6’2 to a needy little puppy is beyond him. but in his defense, he thinks he's been waiting for your attention for ages by now.

it seems like the second you're finally putting down your phone to turn your attention to him is the exact moment your friend decides to send yet another message, your phone buzzing from the notification— and your attention shifts back to that guy just like that.

it's a never ending loop, and he's getting desperate.

“he's not, ume,” you mumble, fingers clicking at your screen. “he's just my friend. and he’s asking to get dinner with everyone tomorrow.”

you don't notice the way his bottom lip pokes out in a pout, eyes then narrowing into a glare directed at your screen before he's pulling you a bit closer to himself, arms holding you impossibly tighter against his chest.

it was really not fair.

it only takes a few more seconds of pouting before his eyes suddenly flicker to the bare skin of your neck, and he perks up when he thinks of an idea. a great idea.

“..you gonna go with them? tomorrow?”

you give him a nod, and if umemiya had a tail— it would be wagging now. his lips start to excitedly ghost over your skin, taking in the scent of your perfume, and his gaze is focused and intentional as he tries to gauge your reaction.

nothing, so far.

so he presses an experimental kiss onto your shoulder, eyes watching you closely— and still nothing. you only perk up a bit when he finally decides to proceed with his plan and takes the skin in his mouth, sucking at it for a bit before releasing it with a lewd pop.

"ume— d-did you just leave a mark?”

“i did,” he’s grinning now, staring at the mark he's left— and he thinks it's surprising dark for how gentle he was. it was only the first one tonight, after all.

“want another one?”

Imagine hating on me but i spend my free time maladaptive daydreaming about getting raw dogged by fictional men