I Was Showering But I Thought Of The Most Toxic Idea Ever But I Kinda Love It Jst Imagine “if I Have

ive found my people 🙏

Live footage of me trying to explain why s2 spencer is hotter than s13

stay with me now🙏🙏

Jason “daaaarlinggg guess who just escaped the psych warddddd” Todd

Clingy

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (BAU!reader)

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WC: 3.7k

Summary: You tended to be very expressive with your friends when showing your affection. Whether it showed in pet names or physical touch. Only thing is, Spencer thinks he’s falling in love with you, and all of your sweet affectionate actions are starting to take a toll on his unrequited heart. At least, he thinks it’s unrequited. 

Tags: there’s a tiny bit of miscommunication but not too much that it will make your head explode like it does mine. Make out but nothing grown/spicy. Friends to lovers. A bit of hurt/comfort

A/N: Not beta read don’t kill me! yoooo spence is so in denial about her feelings in this but lol so real king. This is mostly from his POV but I had to cheat a few times. Hope i can live up to the hype that complimentary colors was. I low key don't like this one as much but had to execute it cause the idea was cute.

You were starting to drive him insane. Criminally insane. You could invade his thoughts at any waking moment of his day and take over his mind. Every affectionate pet name, every soft fleeting touch, hell every time you look at him, he would replay the moment in his mind like a broken record. If he was in a crowded room, his eyes would always fall on you. 

After being with the BAU for a while you became good friends with your coworkers. And with that, came your habit of calling your friends sweet nicknames. Anything from sweetie, to honey, to babes, and the one that broke his heart the most, my love. 

At first he didn’t understand why you were using terms of endearment that were typically used in a romantic relationship, but in a platonic way. At some point he caught on that you were similar to Garcia when it came to expressing your love for friends. Similar to her and the way she has her own sweet silly way of expressing how she cares.

Nevertheless, some small part of his heart still broke when you called him those names. He adored your sweet caring nature and the fact that you cared enough about him to call him terms of endearment. But every time a nickname fell from your lips, he was reminded you only meant it platonically. 

It was his own personal torture to constantly be reminded he would never be your sweetie, your honey … your love. But the nicknames weren’t enough to drive him insane. While it drove him to the brink of insanity, he was able to keep his head somewhat still on his shoulders. 

Not long after the heart warming but crushing nicknames, you showed your true love language. Physical touch. It showed in many forms. It could show when poking JJ in the shoulder and giving Emily a high five. Or nudging Morgan in his side with your elbow. You even managed to get a fist pump from Hotch and Rossi. And of course the welcome and goodbye hugs from Penelope. 

You were a bit hesitant at first to express this love language of yours with Spencer due to his aversion to touch and germs. However, you observed that he would gratefully receive occasional touches. Whether it be a hug, high-five, or even the rare ruffle of his hair -which of course would be from Morgan. So you approached him and asked if he was comfortable with physical contact. 

When it came to you, he was more than comfortable. You could take him in your arms and he would simply melt into a puddle on the floor. Except he didn’t say that and his reply was closer to a mix of stuttering and rambling about how you could never make him uncomfortable and how he just doesn’t like germs. 

Now he’s not saying he regrets his choices. He wouldn’t ever take it back. He enjoys every single lingering touch between the two of you. Actually “enjoys” would be a severe understatement. Every single time you ruffle his hair, lean your head on his shoulder, or even just carefully touch his arm, it was as if a thousand volts of electricity were flowing through him. Like he could light up the city even. You were the best part of his days and the reason breath filled his lungs. You brought a light into his life that made him feel safe and warm. 

He desperately wanted your affection, your attention, your touch, to mean something more than he knew it to be. But sooner or later, touch after touch, he started to go insane. Somewhere along the way he had daydreamed so deep he had lost his mind. 

You had officially driven Spencer Reid insane. 

He was promptly whisked away from his thoughts when he felt the tap of a folder on his shoulder and a light thump on his desk. 

“Hotch wants to know your thoughts on the consultation from Colorado,” you started. 

He blinked back into focus glancing at the papers on his desk. 

“Hey, you alright?” You asked with concern. “You look like your head is in the clouds.”

“I’m fine, just lost in thought,” he answered with a small smile reassuring you.

“Don’t get too lost. Can’t have your genius brain short circuiting on us.” You chuckled as you took a small step closer to him and playfully ruffled his hair. 

“I’ll try not to,” he grinned and pushed his hair back after you messed with it. 

“Well I’ll be back soon, my love. Gotta go bother Penelope,” you joked before making your way out of the bullpen. 

His gaze was lingering on you as you left. His thoughts started to drift to you again as his cheeks turned pink.

“I’ll be back soon, my love,” Morgan mimicked in a higher pitched voice with a grin as he approached Spencer's desk. In response Spencer turned his chair away from Morgan to hide his now red face. 

“When are you two going to start dating? You guys already act like a couple.” 

“We do not act like a couple,” Spencer argued. “She just sometimes calls me pet names, that's normal for her.” 

“You don’t see it do you?” Morgan furrowed his eyebrows and was seconds away from chuckling. “She’s been giving you quite a bit of attention lately. Practically clinging onto you.” 

“I mean I- I don’t think so. She does that with everyone, it's not just me. She just happens to be very affectionate with friends.” He answers as his voice almost cracked. 

Morgan shook his head, “Oh no it’s more than that. Have you ever noticed that she calls you “my love” but she calls us “love”? Or when we’re on a long flight back home and you two are all cuddly on the jet. How she always seeks out your company and finds an excuse to talk to you or about you.” 

Spencer couldn’t speak. He had so many words on the tip of his tongue but his voice wouldn’t make a sound. He sat frozen and mouth slightly agape as his brain started to go into overdrive. 

Morgan's face softened at Spencer's reaction. “It’s different with you kid. Friends don’t act like that.” 

“You and Garcia do.” Spencer countered, this time definitely with a voice crack. Morgan lightly chucked. He was well aware that his and Penelope’s friendship was a bit different than other male/female friendships. 

“Okay you got me there, but you and Y/N aren’t me and Garcia. We may flirt with each other a lot but that’s our thing. You two have this care for each other like nothing I've ever seen.” 

Spencer was left stunned once again and Morgan could practically see the gears in his head turning.

“You may not notice it now, or hell you may not let yourself notice it now, but it’s true.” 

Those words rang in the back of Spencer's mind for days. Of course on a regular basis you would occupy his mind at any given moment. But now it wasn’t just thoughts about you. His mind was over analyzing almost every interaction between you and him, trying to find what Morgan had talked about. Some form of evidence that proved what you felt for him was beyond what he had initially thought. 

He was recounting all the recent times you had approached him out of the members of your team. He recalled all the times you were either hanging out or on the jet and you found yourself tracing patterns on his arm. He was rethinking when you started to use nicknames around him and how it could be different with him than with others. It turned out Morgan might be right, as Spencer realized the numerous times you referred to Garcia or Emily as “love”, but in the rare instance you said “my love” it was only ever directed to him. 

The idea of you liking him back had become an all consuming thought, but he was too terrified to ask you. What if Morgan was wrong? Profilers have been wrong before. He became petrified by the idea of asking you about it and possibly finding out his feelings were unrequited. But most of all, he was scared of losing you. Scared that if he brought it up he would make things awkward and ruin your friendship. He couldn’t lose you, not over something as trivial as his feelings. 

Unfortunately the mental toll this was taking on his mind started to show. Not so obvious that the everyday person would notice, but you weren’t an everyday person. You grew to know him like the back of your hand. So of course you started to notice the little changes in his behavior. His ever so slight flinch when you would initially touch him. His eyes which used to linger on you and catch your eyes from across the room, now focused almost anywhere you weren’t. The way his body froze when you placed a hand on his shoulder. The way his eyes partially widened when you called him anything other than his name. 

He tried to hide his worries from you, but you could tell something was bothering him. 

Something about you.

His overall behavior didn’t reflect that he was avoiding you or distancing himself from you. He still talked to you and acted around you like normal. Instead it felt like he was holding himself back from receiving or truly appreciating your affection the way he used to. 

~

Days had passed and the team was sent on a case. While this case was an emotional rollercoaster for everyone, it had affected you the most. The victims had reminded you of yourself and the unsub and all of his delusional reasoning for his actions had hit very close to home. 

The team caught the unsub and closed the case quite late in the evening. Everyone was exhausted after the grueling past few days and decided to spend the night at the hotel to rest and leave in the morning. You however, still felt an ache in your stomach from all the anxiety felt throughout the day. You couldn’t seem to relax and let that weight off your shoulders. So you went to the one person who could help.  

Spencer was getting ready to go to sleep, peacefully reading a book in bed when he got a knock on his door. He placed his book down and when he opened the door he was greeted by you in pajama pants and a zip up hoodie, clearly also winding down for the night. 

“Hey,” you greeted. 

“Hi, what’s up? Is everything okay?” he asked, a bit concerned as to why you showed up at his hotel so late at night. He opened the door wider signaling you were welcome inside. You entered the room and stuffed your hands in your pockets as he closed the door. 

“I’m okay I just …” you cleared your throat. “I know this case has been a tough one but today’s been really hard for me. I’m still wired and awake, I can’t seem to relax enough to go to sleep,” You abruptly stopped your rambling to catch your breath. 

“This might sound dumb but, I’m in desperate need of a hug right now,” you finally admitted quietly.

He hated seeing you so timid and closed off. How you made yourself smaller than you were, all because you were asking for your basic needs to be met. 

“You don’t have to explain yourself.” 

“Huh?” 

“You don’t have to explain why you need a hug. You can just ask,” he said reassuringly. 

“Oh.” 

“Physical contact has been shown to increase levels of dopamine, serotonin, and even oxytocin; therefore, decreasing levels of stress and anxiety. Some people might even argue that physical touch is a fundamental element of being human and experiencing life.” His other way of trying to validate your feelings was of course rambling a string of facts and information from his fingertips. 

You couldn’t help but smile. God he loved it when you smiled. 

“So is that a yes?” you asked since you never exactly got an answer from your question in the first place. Even though you knew what his answer was. 

The corners of his lips turned into a grin. “Come here,” he says with outstretched arms. 

You practically ran into him at his offer. He wrapped his arms around you as you placed yours around his neck. He wished this moment could last forever. All while at the same time Morgan's previous statements were circling around in his head. 

He tried his best to push them away. He tried to tell himself this was not you acting on any potential feelings for him. This was simply you reaching out to a friend in need. 

He took note of the way you held onto him so tightly, almost as if he could leave at any second. It made his heart ache. 

“You feel tired,” he almost whispered. 

“I am,” you mumbled back, face buried in his neck. 

“Do you wanna lie down?” 

You lightly patted him on the back, “Don’t worry I’ll leave you be and go to sleep soon. I just need a minute 

“I meant … I meant do you want to lie down here?” He stammered. “So you’re not alone. You seem like you need a friend right now.” 

His own heart almost cracks when he says friend. But that’s what you need right now, a friend. 

“I’d like that,” you said with a small smile. 

You separate from him and he leads you to the bed holding your hand. He sits down against the headboard and waits for you to join him. 

You awkwardly sit down on the bed, eyes darting in all directions of where he’s sitting. “I- what should I …” 

“You could sit down the way you do on the jet,” he kindly offers. 

You relax at his words and move to sit at his side. He wraps his arm around you as you rest your head against his shoulder. You both sat there in a moment of silence, enjoying eachothers company. He was getting lost in the sweet smell of your perfume; the small bit of it that still lingers from the long day you’ve had. 

He started to recall all the times you two would be close like this. It didn’t happen very often. Sometimes on a long jet ride home from a long or stressful case. Or sometimes when the team went out for drinks and you would be tired from dancing. In the rare occasions you two were like this, you would tend to draw patterns on his arm or leg. 

So he decided to finally return the favor. With the arm he had wrapped around you, he started to dance his fingertips over your upper arm. 

He felt you practically melt into him at the action. If you could get any closer to him, you did. 

He continued tracing your arm with an overwhelming amount of care. It made you consider his previous actions compared to how welcome you were now in his arms. 

“Spencer, I’m gonna ask you something, and I need you to be completely honest with me,” you spoke with a hidden hesitation in your voice. 

“Of course I’ll be honest to you. I always will be,” he furrowed his brows at the thought of you being scared of him lying to you. 

You let out a small, almost shaky breath. “Am I clingy?” you murmured. 

This made his hand on your arm stop. He shifted his sitting position so he could face you better but also didn’t want to let you out of his hold. 

“No, never,” he told you with assurance. “Why would you think you’re clingy?” 

He saw you hesitate once more before you gave him your reply. “I was just overthinking things. Worried I was taking the physical contact thing too far or that I’m a bit too affectionate at times.“

“Why would you be worried? You’d never take things too far. You’ve always been respectful of other people’s boundaries.” 

You sighed with a shaky breath. He could practically see through you and see you considering your response. 

“Because I thought I was making you uncomfortable.” you looked down to avoid his gaze. 

He was quiet for a second, absolutely baffled as to how you would think you could ever make him uncomfortable. “Why?” His question was a barely audible whisper.  

“You seemed different. All of a sudden you would freeze when I touched you. You became jumpy and skittish when I talked to you. I thought I was too much for you but you didn’t want to tell me about it.” 

You shifted away to face him and his hand fell from your arm. You fidgeted with the sleeves of your hoodie as your face went blank. 

“You could never be too much for me,” he spoke with a soft voice. He tried to reach his hand out to hold yours but your hand disappeared in your sleeve at his touch. 

“Then why were you different all of a sudden?” You narrowed your eyes at him. 

His cheeks started to turn pink, “I- I wasn’t.” 

“Yes you were.” 

“Y/N please,” he begged. 

“Spencer,” you whispered as your eyes bore into his. “You said you’d be honest with me.” 

He licked his lips and his face turned red. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He couldn’t find an escape route. He had no choice but to tell you. And once the flood gate opened, he would never be able to close it. 

“I was freaking out,” he blurted. 

“I was freaking out because Morgan implanted this idea in my head that you might possibly have feelings for me based on the way you act around me. I’ve been obsessed with that thought since he mentioned it. So I freaked out almost every time you touched me, talked to me, even looked at me,” he rambled on anxiously as he tried to explain himself. No holding back now. 

“I tried not to let it change my behavior but I guess it did and I am so sorry for that. I never wanted to give you the impression that I was uncomfortable. To be honest I don’t think you could ever make me uncomfortable” 

You were silent for a moment. He couldn’t read your reaction. Your eyebrows slightly raised with your lips parted. He could only see surprise, which was typical, he just didn’t know if this kind of surprise was good. 

“Why were you so obsessed with the idea of me having feelings for you?” 

He could’ve sworn his heart was going to beat out of his chest at any moment. 

“Because I think I’m falling in love with you.”

 Here we go. Flood gates. 

“The idea you might like me back became an all consuming thought because I never before thought it was possible and I never wanted to get my hopes up. Actually, I pretty much think about you all the time so it wasn’t that far from normal. ” 

“You’re falling in love with me?” you asked barely above a whisper. 

“Yes,” he spoke softly with full confidence. 

The only change to your appearance was your eyes widened a bit more. It made Spencer's heart sink to his stomach. 

“Listen, I understand if this makes things weird between us and I am so sorry. I just couldn’t ..”

He couldn't finish his thought, you were too busy locking your lips with his. It was a sweet but cautious kiss, almost as if you were testing the waters in uncharted territory. You felt him freeze against you so you leaned away, breaking from the kiss. 

Not even seconds later Spencer placed a hand on your face and was diving back into the kiss with fervor. You instantly reacted as your arms found their way around his neck and your hand was digging in his hair. The kiss was intoxicating. Both of you trying to get a taste of the other after what felt like eons of pinning. 

He wrapped his arms around your waist while his one hand snuck up to the small of your back where your hoodie had exposed your skin. It sent a shiver up your spine while you let out a shaky breath against his lips. You tried shifting in your seat to somehow get closer to him. With his hands against your waist he helped guide you to sit in his lap straddling him. 

When you finally break from the kiss your faces are red and Spencer rests his forehead against yours. You focus on the sound of his breath and the feeling of your heart practically beating in your ears. 

Your hand moves to play with the hairs at the nape of his neck. “I guess I didn’t do a very good job at showing I had feelings for you.” 

The corners of his mouth lift up into a giddy smile. “No, you did. I’m just oblivious.”

“Sounded like you were in denial,” you lightly teased. 

“That too,” he chuckles. 

After a moment of enjoying each other's presence, you pull away from him just far enough to look him in the eyes. 

“I know I call everyone pet names, but every time I used them with you, I wanted it to mean something more. Part of me would always hope you would one day call me those names back,” 

Spencer swore his heart could give out at any second. He never expected to hear this from you and it made him lightheaded.

“This may sound childish but.. I never craved attention so badly, until you gave me yours,” you added. 

He licked his lips and smiled. With his hands still on your waist he traced mindless patterns at your sides. “You have my complete and undivided attention, my love.”

His words made you giddy. You bit your lip to keep yourself from giggling. Although, he would never be opposed to hearing your beautiful laugh. 

There were no words to describe the way that you felt. So without thinking, you leaned forward once more to capture his lips with yours. 

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Tag Requests: @nomajdetective

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ex!suna rintarou x singer!reader

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im not sure i like this chapter, also this is probs the only time theyll see each other for a while cause i love slow burns and i just dont want it to go too fast

so, kenma and kei def could go they just wanted y/n to go

suna isnt in denial anymore like y/n is, he knows shes the love of his life

i couldn’t not talk about matthew im so normal about him🩷

y/n used to get food for tooru or the whole team but she didn’t want to after suna joined the team

i love me a good slow burn enemies or exes to lovers with a lot of angst and then fluff at the end so get ready and i also love miscommunication LMAO

but also expect a lot of humor filler chapters bc i love crack smaus and bc i started this story impulsively and do not have it planned yet LMAO

im so normal about suna

also i got the idea of akaashi getting discounts from another au i just cant remember which one

taglist (OPEN)

@lvc-lv @renardiererin @3lectraheart @nyxlai @beckxisxinxlovexwithxjin @wooasecret

Hii, its okay! Please dont feel rushed and take all the time you need <3 it doesnt need to be +18 if you're not comfortable, i also like angst to fluff jajaja

Thank you sm!! I just don’t know how to write smut, but i LOOOVE angst to fluff😭

One Last Time

Mattheo Riddle x Reader

➸ summary: after weeks of torment, you find something that completely changes what happened between you and mattheo. things finally come to a head when you confront him about it

➸ warnings/notes: angst, eventual fluff, eventual smut (18+), soft!mattheo, fwb!reader, normal people quote🤫

A/N: second and final part to ‘through my fingertips’

word count: 3k

————————

THE DAYS DRAGGED into weeks as you floated through your daily life. Everything seemed like a dream, like you were only watching yourself from far away, but weren’t actually living your own life. Mattheo was no better, either.

He partied and attended classes like normal, but his usual escapades of finding women to “wine and dine” were long forgotten. The only thing occupying his mind was you and your last moments together. Everything was perfect, just like everything is with you - if only it wasn’t for the fact that his heart felt like it was ripping out of his chest when he slowly put his clothes back on. Your shoulders rising and falling as he tied his laces made his head fuzzy and the only thing he wanted to do in that moment was to crawl back in bed and take you into his arms.

If only that’s what he actually did. Instead he sat at your desk, watching you intently as you mumbled sleepily, your legs scrunched up in a fetal position.

A switch flipped inside of him that morning. He needed to get this thoughts out, to put them somewhere so that he didn’t have to carry it alone. The thought of burdening you with more than you were already harboring made the unbearable clench in his chest worse, so he opted to find a piece of paper and pen. Mattheo recalled you saying that whenever you were unsure of yourself, you wrote in your journal to help piece your mental state together.

So that was what he did. He wrote it all. From the day he met you to the day he realized he loved you, right to the very second that he was in, his eyes lingering on your slumbering form every so often.

When he left your room he scrunched it up and threw it in the trash in his room. There was no need for you to see it. It would only hurt you more.

The bell rang to signify the start of your lunch break. Really, you weren’t too hungry these days, but you followed your friends out to the courtyard anyway, hoping that their presence would lift your spirits. In your most desperate moments, you found yourself closing your eyes as you sat in the sunlight, imagining with all your might that the warmth was really Mattheo’s arms pulling you into him. That was always how you felt with him - warm.

But as warm as he was on the outside, he was just as cold on the inside.

As you leaned your back against the rough tree stump, you let the breeze take you away into your own memories. Your friend’s voices shifted into white noise, and the darkness behind your eyelids started to take form in the likeness of him.

You thought only of him. Those dark brown eyes that made you melt in his arms whenever he looked at you, how safe you felt when his head was rested on your shoulder from behind, and his arms wrapped around you securely. But most of all, you remembered how his voice sounded - how it would brush over your face when he kissed you goodbye.

He used to kiss you goodbye. Who does that in a casual relationship? Was he really leading you on - were you just too oblivious to notice his tricks?

A poke from your left broke you from the trance. Following the person’s gaze, you looked towards the end of the courtyard, your friend beginning to point at the intruder. There stood Theo, hands in his pockets as his eyes fixated on you. You didn’t know why he was here, or what he wanted. In all the time you were seeing Mattheo he never really tried to talk to you.

Turning away from him, you continued just as you were before. Ignoring every reminder that Mattheo existed while simultaneously daydreaming of everything being okay again.

Mattheo woke up with a racing heart. The night terrors he used to have morphed into dreams of you somewhere along the way. Maybe the change happened the morning that he came back from yours, or perhaps it was a gradual switch over the course of these painful few weeks. Whatever the cause was, he didn’t care to know. He just wanted it to be over; because the nightmares of his father coming back to find him were less terrifying than the reality he was living in. Making up images of you in his mind, only to awake cold and alone.

It was obvious what was going through his head. Each of his friends could tell, but Theodore was the only one who shared his pain. Mattheo never spoke about what you said to him, but on the days that Theo would sit with his friend in silence, trying to offer some sort of company and comfort, the choked sniffles and attempts at hiding his tears were enough indication that he was hurting badly.

Theo needed to do something. He couldn’t keep watching his friend ruin his own chance at happiness.

One evening he decided that enough was enough. The door to Mattheo’s room slammed open, the room void of any color and joy. Theo spent at least an hour looking around the room. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for, but when he found it he would know.

Fate must have been working with him because he noticed himself kneeling on the floor, hand reaching into the bin at the end of the room. He uncovered a wrinkled letter, Mattheo’s handwriting sprawled across it haphazardly.

He only read the first sentence, but he immediately knew that you needed to see it.

Feet moving faster than his brain, Theo ultimately found himself outside your bedroom. Not sure whether to knock or slip the note under the door, his jumbled mind somehow did both. You opened the door in no time, your eyes puffy and your hair pulled back from your face. He was used to seeing your bright, cheery smile, not this ghost of a person.

“Hi. I’m Theo,” he said stupidly.

You sighed, running your hair atop your head to push down any flyaways. “I know who you are, Theo. Why are you here?”

His eyes flitted to the floor where the white sheet stood, right next to the fluffy socks on your feet. He remembered the day that Mattheo bought you those, and he adamantly denied that they were from him. You knew, though, as you opened the “anonymous” gift with a big grin.

“You should open that,” he said, his eyes meeting yours once again. “If nothing changes after you read it, then I’ll leave you alone.”

Confused, you mumbled some sort of agreement and closed the door. You didn’t need his friends hounding you as well as the lingering memories of your time together. Leaning down, you picked up the letter and sat down on your bed. Your heart stopped when you noticed Mattheo’s signature handwriting - you knew because he always crossed his t’s dramatically, and you used to make fun of him for it.

———

Dear, To my,

When I first met you. If you asked me a month ago what love meant, I would’ve told you it was a made up fairytale that people tell themselves to feel better. That it’s a weakness and a burden, but when I first saw you that day in the hallway, I never really stood a chance. You wormed your way into my soul and made a home there, all cozy and pretty, just like you. Maybe I always knew that I was falling for you, but when you held me in the palm of your hand, so gentle and sweet, like I would break at any moment, I knew I was in deeper than I thought. No one has ever seen me the way you do - no one has ever pushed past the ugly and scary parts of me to find the one good sliver of humanity inside. If only You know that I'm not a religious person, but I do sometimes think that God made you just for me.

Your quiet snores are like music to my ears as I write this. I’m reserving it all to memory before I can never hear it again. I don’t blame you for thinking I don’t care, but I traced the words ‘I love you’ on your skin while you slept naked in my arms and I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry for saying it through my fingertips instead of my mouth.

It’s If you ask me now, I’d say that love is sitting in front of a beautiful girl as she sleeps, writing letters to her that she’ll never see. To me, love is only found in the shape of you, and now as I sit in your room for the last time, I’m trying to make a mold of it to bring back with me. But nothing will be as good as the real thing.

Love, I realize now, is just you.

———

Tears dropped down your face, landing on the ink and causing it to bleed into a black mess.

If he had said half of this to you when he was here for the last time, perhaps things would’ve turned out differently. Maybe you just never gave him enough of a chance. There was no use in dwelling on it now; what’s done is done, and all that matters is what happens next.

You sat like that for half an hour, crying onto the paper as you reread the words over and over again. You had to find him.

Deciding against changing your clothes and completely forgetting to put on your shoes, you balled up the paper in your hands and sprinted out of your room. Eyes followed you along the corridors, worried murmurs and whispers shadowing your every move as you hurriedly looked through the common rooms and hallways. It was a Sunday. He was most likely in his room.

When Mattheo opened the door, the last thing he expected to see was you.

“You’re an idiot, Mattheo Riddle,” you said, your voice still quivering from crying all day.

He didn’t exactly disagree, but he also didn’t understand where you were coming from. Haven’t you been trying to ignore him? Something big must have happened for you to actually come to him.

“I know,” was all he said, too exhausted to question you or argue.

“No,” you said, pushing your way into his room. “You don’t understand. You’re an idiot.”

Mattheo’s nostrils flared. Did you only come here to insult him? He was already having enough of a hard time as it is, he didn’t need you reminding him of things he already knew.

Swinging the door closed, he crossed his arms against his chest. “Yeah, anything else you need to say?” he grumbled, his head throbbing from both anger and pure sadness.

He felt a piece of paper hit his head. When he looked to find the source, he recognized it within seconds. You read the note. How on Earth did you find it? He felt humiliated - he never thought he would bare his heart to someone like this, the concept too foreign for him to even comprehend.

“You let me think that you hated me! If you had just - if you told me, I wouldn’t have let you leave.”

A thick wad of spit traveled down his throat. He could barely swallow, his mouth was too dry. In all honesty, he wasn’t even hearing you properly - you said something about leaving?

“What?” he croaked.

“Tell me now. Tell me with your mouth, and not your fingertips,” you pleaded, searching his eyes for any indication that what he wrote was true. “Say it now and I’ll give you another chance.”

It was like the floodgates opened, and Mattheo’s resolve completely crumbled.

You read the letter, and you weren’t disgusted by his proclamation of love. Here you were, wanting him to reassure you that what he said was real, that he really meant it all. You did care, and you did want him in the same way that he wanted you - you were just as scared as he was.

Mattheo fell to his knees, his hands circling your waist and his brown locks finding refuge on your stomach. The tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and above him, your own sobs matched the rhythm of his. You messed with his curls as you cried it out together, his head digging into the fabric of your clothes, causing wet patches to form there.

“I’m yours. I’ve always been yours,” he cried, his grip on you only growing stronger by the minute.

You kneeled down to his level, your forehead meeting his as his and your salty tear droplets met together in the middle. Wiping Mattheo’s cheeks with the pad of your thumb, you whispered to him, your lips brushing against his at the proximity.

“Please come back to me,” you said.

“I am, I am,” he replied, so quickly that he almost didn’t even catch it. “Can we try again? Just one last time? I promise I’ll be better.”

With a nod of your head, the deal was sealed. You stayed wrapped up in eachother’s embrace for an eternity, the unspoken words between you being exchanged through every squeeze, and sniffle, and touch of skin. The need to be closer got hard to ignore, to the point that you were both so pent up and needy, that your lips found purchase upon his without you even thinking. It was like you were on autopilot.

Hands were pulling at his shirt, roaming across the planes of his torso as you grabbed at everything you could reach. He carefully stood up, lifting you along with him as he slowly walked you to his bed.

Mattheo guided you to lay down, his mouth trailing vows of love across your neck as his hands raised your shirt and bra off. He let his hands rest on one of your breasts, kneading it softly. Your skin was buzzing at the contact. You didn’t realize just how much you missed him until you felt the heat from his touch meet your inner thigh.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” he muttered against your skin, his mind so hazy that he hadn’t even realized that he finally admitted to you what he was so afraid of admitting before.

Vision growing blurry, you nodded, a gasp interrupting the words that were about to come out. Mattheo’s fingers were already working through your folds, the deft movements bringing you closer to the edge. With every pump and curl, he punctuated it with a kiss on whichever body part he could reach. His knee pushed your legs apart further, wanting to have as much of you as he could.

“I’m so sorry,” he babbled, his eyes closing upon hearing your whiny sighs and moans. “You deserve everything. Let me give you everything.”

Your nails dug into his bare shoulder as you came with a loud cry, tears falling onto the bedsheets from the heavy emotions you were feeling. It was all too much. Mattheo’s words of affection, and the way he pulled your pants down so deliberately, ghosting his lips upon every inch of your legs - you might as well have died and gone to heaven.

Unbuckling his belt, you freed him from the confines of his clothes, hand closing around his shaft as he sighed in relief.

“I love you,” you said, craning your neck to capture him in another kiss. Mattheo rested his elbows beside your head, his eyebrows scrunching and his head nodding at your words.

“Say it again. Please,” he groaned.

The tip of his cock was brushing against the entrance of your hole, his own hand moving it up to trail along your lips every so often. It was a mess of wetness, the desperation you both felt for one another obvious.

“I love you, Mattheo,” you said, before a moan slipped out as he thrusted into you, so slowly that you felt like you’d pass out. Everything he did was without rush. He let himself rest inside of you for a moment, head resting in the crook of your neck as his breath tickled you.

Pulling back almost fully, he snapped his hips down harshly, before lifting them again, slow and meaningful. The combination of his deep thrusts and slow pull outs made you see stars, your thoughts completely gone from your mind as you held onto Mattheo for support. He was the only thing that was keeping you sane right now - even though he was also the one driving you crazy with pleasure.

“Missed you,” he spoke, his voice muffled by your hair. “You were made for me, I swear.”

Panting in unison, your movements sped up. Before even thinking about himself, Mattheo snuck his hand in between your bodies to flick your clit, the nub already slick with arousal. Your teeth scraped across his bicep, trying to hold back from being too loud. This only made him move faster, the only thing on his mind being your orgasm. Right now, you were his biggest priority, and you most likely would be for the rest of his life.

It wasn’t long before you reached your peak, Mattheo following close behind.

He collapsed on top of you, his breathing erratic and his heart racing a million times per minute. He was a little terrified that he was going to wake up and realize that this was all a dream, but when he opened his eyes he only saw you, a small smile playing on your lips as you let your eyelashes flutter closed.

“I meant everything I said in that letter,” he whispered against your collarbone. “I love you, and I’ll spend forever proving it to you if I have to.”

You turned your head to face him, heart softening at the way he looked at you - like you were everything. And to Mattheo, you were.

“Better get started then,” you said as your smile grew, “because we don’t have forever, but we do have all day.”

With a laugh, he kissed your lips once again, his tongue never having tasted enough of you. You needed to thank Theo big time.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @tomriddleslove @ahqkas @hoeforvinniehackerrr

©𝐜𝐫𝐯𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐝𝐠𝐟

i SUCK at writing filler chapters oh but i wanted it to be slow burn didnt i? 🙄😔

help me, the only reason why i haven’t posted a second chapter to my jason fic is bc idk why i always have to name my stories after songs, like the stories i have written in wattpad all have a song as a title AND I CANT FUCKING THINK OF ANY SONG WHICH I CAN BASE THE CHAPTER OFF😭 like i have a general idea of what to do with the fic but i have no idea of what to write in this chapter and which song i could base it off from😭

i love this sm, I think book 1 and this books are the best thing i’ve ever read😭

Summary:

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of FWB)

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, smut, mentions of being tortured, mentions of being held captive, mentions of abuse (comic!Canon), violence, canon violence, mentions of death, various injuries, bruises, blood, hurt/comfort, some anxiety, ptsd, hints of depression (canon), mentions of Batman villains being Batman villains, nightmares, some paranoia, discussions about previous homelessness, drug mentions, drug use (canon), canon character deaths, gore, brainwashing, manipulation (canon), minor changes to the season 3 canon plotline, titans season 3 spoilers, i am a defender of Jason’s white streak of hair in the comics

A/N: The WAY I’ve been looking forward to this book. It’s gonna be FUN. There will more in depth warnings for the chapters as needed!! You don’t have to read book 1 to read this one, but you might want some extra context. If you don’t want to read all of that, you can just ask me and I’ll tell you what you need to know to read this book!!

tag list | playlist | full masterlist

↳ status: ONGOING updates: Wednesdays

Chapters:

Chapter 1 - Gotham Chapter 2  - Somebody To Someone Chapter 3 - By Accident Chapter 4 - Born With A Broken Heart Chapter 5 - And Then On Purpose Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10  Chapter 11  Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17

Book 1 Masterlist

Fic Inspired Works:

Jason Todd moodboard Playlist Post

OC Versions

AO3 Wattpad