Henry: I Have A Plan!

Gryffindor: did Ravenclaw just use "stupefy" on you?

Slytherin: me and my girl don't argue, she bash my head with a rock and I walk it off like a man.

Ps: Ranpoe is Enemies TO lovers since they are no longer fighting. Also Jouno and Tecchou don't count, since they are technically still on the same side despite fighting.

This is the Double Black generations~

Will they continue the legacy after Atsushi and Aku?

Headcanon (spoilers S5!!!): The reason we don't see Dazai being suicidal (I don't remember a single suicide joke in S5) anymore is because during his time in prison he had therapy sessions with Fyodor and started to change for better. That is why he says to Fyodor "You can't kill me" because he doesn't want to die anymore. It's Dazai showing his appreciation for the therapy sessions by killing Fyodor. What a wonderful friendship.

L: I love eating cake

Light: (what is he trying to say? Is he trying to see if my reaction to him liking cake means I am kira? Is he baiting me to posion him? I could poison all his food and blame it all on Matsuda if I want. He probably makes Watari taste all his food before he eats them)

L: Light, do you like cake?

Light: (is this a trick? Is he trying to make me think about cakes while he analyses my responses, to see if I am Kira or not? Does my answer prove I am innocent or guilty? He can't prove anything by my answer) Not much, Riyuzaki.

L: Kira doesn't like cakes, what a shame.

Light: how do you know?

L: you just said you don't like Cake much didn't you Light?

Light: (uhhh he got me! How did I slip up!) I am not Kira

L: yeah sure and I am not the best detective in the world

The Curse of Creativity and the suffering of artists:

"There are tons of people who are just as good as me." - Seiji Amasawa, Whisper of the heart (1995)

Ghibli movies have always had a huge impact on me. Full of quiet sensibilities and easily understood complex concepts; Ghibli movies made my childhood and the person I am today. And despite the cuteness of Totoro, the innocence of Ponyo, the quirky weirdness of Howl's moving castle (the themes of that movie are so intricate too) or the message about hardwork and burnout in Kiki's delivery service, there is one movie that remains in my heart (no pun intended)

"Whisper of the Heart" has taught me so much about myself and the path I am headed. It is the most beautiful, soul-crushing movie I have ever watched not because it has wars and the death of loved ones but because it is relatable and grounded. I can see myself in Shizuko and Seiji, I understand their struggles and dreams. I smiled with them and I cried for them. I related to Shizuko's struggle to see her writing as anything good and Seiji's belief that despite his achievements he isn't anywhere near as good at his skills as some other people.

This movie made me think about the saying I so often hear "Don't suffer for your dreams". While I scoffed at it when an adult said that to me first, now that I am much older and hopefully wiser, the words struck me not as nagging but as a warning.

Suffering doesn't equal great art, some people think that only those who are depressed and mentally ill can make great art, which is completely false. (Although I don't blame those people as many great artists and writers were actually mentally ill, it's not the only thing that makes one a great artist!) You don't have to suffer to be a great artist, you just have to be creative and work hard, there's nothing more to that.

When I was in my most depressed state during the last two years of high school, I wasn't writing or working hard on my book. I was staring at the wall wishing I would disappear. Overcoming that depression led me to write better, work harder, chase my dreams with passion.

During the times where I am stuck in a chapter I can't get through and my brain goes blank, I think to myself if I am actually a good writer or I have been just treading the waters of talent that I don't have. When people call me talented, it makes me squirm, it takes away my hardwork and effort.

Being a creative person is not easy, it's not all sunshine and rainbows where you are constantly getting new ideas. Sometimes it makes my head hurt. Acting on your ideas is not easy. I can think all I want but when it comes to actually writing that idea, I freeze.

Being an artistic person makes you feel self conscious. If anyone will like what I do? Will someone criticize me? What if no one likes my work? What if they judge me? There's someone who is better than me, why should I even bother?

Creativity isn't just a blessing, it's also a curse. It's a double-edged sword.

You should try to achieve the best but not make it your end goal. Life is so much more than success, fame and material goods. I don't write for any of those things, I write for myself and the people I care for. Even if I don't end up publishing any of my novels, I would still write. Never stop dreaming and become monotonous, you don't have to make sure your hobbies earn you money, they should give you peace and happiness.

There are times when I spend too much time in front of my computer typing out another new story when I stop and think back at those words, I don't feel dispassionate, suffering won't make me happy, writing whatever I want would. So I type ahead for some more minutes and take a break. I indulge in the world that I create in my books and make characters that I love more deeply than human beings, but I don't want it to become my life. I would still do normal everyday things and talk to normal everyday people. Work-life balance is utter bullshit and too idealistic, but making sure your work doesn't consume your life is what matters.

Even if I do end up getting an ordinary job and not making my hobby a career, I would not be disappointed.

I am ready to live a life of rationality and pragmatism but I will never accept monotony.

After Bunny's death: Richard decides to say his internal monologue aloud (this is not a passage from the book)

Richard: "The view of the red blood mixing in with the soil shows how one's sins taint the purity of life. Bunny falls to his death in the beautiful light of the dusk, as his friends are celebrating one day well spent, he lays in between rocks and the broken bottle of wine, to show the morbid display of the youth of today. What a great life he could have had if not to commit treason against the people who trusted him. And what irony is it that he is pushed to his death by the same people who he had spent hours beside as a friend. That is the biggest truth of life, for its unpredictability is what makes life far more terrifying than death itself. The soil has become red with Bunny's blood; the wind blows, snow has started to fall to bury the remains of one cheery, smiling boy. What a beautiful sight it is to see someone die in front of you, it shows how aesthetics remain even in death"

Camilla, Charles and Francis: What the fuck Richard? 😶😶😶

Henry: *gives an approving nod* that is exactly what I was thinking, you took words from my mouth.

(PS: Richard's unhinged monologues give me life every time I read TSH. Also I believe Richard and Henry have a spiritual connection)

Person: did you like the love triangle in the Secret history?

Me: oh you mean the love Hexagon? Loved it!

My mom thinks I am in a cult. No, The secret history, iwwv, and dead poet's society are not books/movie, it's a religion.

Currently in my Cecelia Lisbon era.

Things I have said or done as an INTP:

~ "It's not like I hate talking, you are just so boring. I don't even remember what you said two seconds ago. That's how unremarkable you are. So, it's not a ME problem, it's a YOU problem"

~ "I forgot to eat breakfast and lunch"

~ "Do I really need to wish someone their birthday? Do y'all like getting old?"

~ "Whenever I feel awkward, I imagine brutal ways to kill people"

~ "What do you mean I can't order from the kids menu? I eat like five things in my life"

~ "Sometimes I put on earphones just to avoid people"

~ "The T.V remote was too far away so I stared at the wall for five hours"

~ "I don't have enough energy to correct you right now, call me later"

~ *person says* "Hey, how are you?"

*ME* "Nice to meet you my name is just fine....wait"

~ "I am willing to die proving a point"

~ "I am not gonna study. What's the worst thing that happens? I fail. It's not like I am dying. I won't mind that either"

~ "I gave up on life when I was 11. The best decision I ever made"

~ "I am not sorry for coming late. I feel sorry that I came"

~ "I will touch grass when I am in the coffin"

~ "Well actually, everything you said was opinions, not facts. I don't care about how you feel, if you don't care about what I think"

~ "I pity how dumb you are"