Half Of Being Trans Is Being Hypervigilant Against Transphobes. Like, I Spent 15 Minutes Scrolling Down

How to start again ✨

delete apps and social media that lowers your mood 

wear a new scent, throw away things you don’t need, delete contacts of people who make you feel unworthy, unfollow social media that makes you feel bad in any way

make a new playlist that makes you feel confident and happy 

in a journal, write down why you want to change, the traits of the person you truly want to be, the places you want to go and people that make you feel inspired

write down the things that stop you and bad habits you have, and replace those with new mindsets and habits 

before you sleep, make a detailed, achievable routine for the next day, that includes everything you want to do, including activities that genuinely make you happy

try new hobbies, like baking/cooking, playing a musical instrument, making art, learning a new skill, a sport, or a new language. you can easily get free resources online 

think about the ideal version of yourself. you can be like that, if you try your best and work hard. 

do not overwork yourself or set overly lofty daily goals and forget to do things like drink water. make your sleep and health your number one priority.

spend less time on your phone scrolling through social media. have a method of focusing on other things, like Pomodoro method or using the Forest app. 

if you can’t concentrate, commit yourself to doing it for 5 minutes. once you get into the flow it’s much easier to concentrate.

be patient and kind with yourself. it’s hard to change overnight. you’re the only one who can help change you, so be a friend to yourself.

once you start something, promise yourself you will finish it. 

have new weekly routines, like going to a cafe every Wednesday afternoon or indulging in your favourite tv show every Friday night.

do not deny yourself of good things; there needs to be a balance. similarly, do not be too generous and overdo it too much. 

dedicate a day to clean your room and organize your things if you feel stressed out. 

it may feel scary to change, as you may feel like it’s not the real you. but you’re still you, just the best version of yourself.

have a relaxing morning routine to look forward to, like making a nice breakfast, having a skin care routine, stretches, journalling, or thinking about nothing for a few minutes

have a mental image that makes you excited to do something. visualize yourself completing the goal and concentrate on it every morning.

however, learn not to rely on motivation because your brain will often turn off motivation, especially when you first begin something. have a routine, a specific time to do something, and do it. 

notice the places and people that drain your energy, and try to avoid them. find people who make you feel energized and places that calm you.

think about an enjoyable part of something. for example, when studying you can look forward to learning new things and when exercising, listening to calming music or using nice stationery. it’s actually more fun than you think. 

even though it’s hard, don’t compare yourself. you’re on your own path, and it doesn’t matter if people are better than you, because there will always be someone better than everyone. don’t be afraid to suck. so draw badly, write bad poems, run slowly, make embarrassing mistakes and fail everything. you can’t be good at something unless you’re terrible at something first. and doing anything badly is so much better than doing nothing.

don’t tell anyone about your new beginning, just start and let the results speak for themselves.

you can change and be your ideal self. but it will be hard to do that if you don’t believe in yourself. so make sure you challenge negative thoughts telling you can’t do something. tell yourself firmly that you can do it and then prove your negative thoughts wrong.

Meditations in an Emergency, Cameron Awkward-Rich

me: babe u look like an angel :)

her:

Donna Tartt with her Pug, Pongo.

“My dog has a number of acquaintances of his own species — as do I — but it is abundantly clear to both of us that there is little company in all the world which we enjoy so much as each other’s.”

i made a quiz find out how rancid you are and leave your results in the tags

literally every aspect of life including just sitting in your room to study becomes more interesting and fun if you pretend you're the main character of a dark academia book and you're busy covering up a murder

lines from the epic of gilgamesh that make me feel like this

a list of very good greek mice names from the battle of the frogs and the mice

Ψιχάρπαξ- crumbsnatcher

Τρωξάρτης- breadnibbler

Πτερνοτρώκτος- hamnibbler

Λειχοπίναξ- platelicker

᾿Εμβασίχυτρος- bowl-visitor

Τυρογλύφος- cheesecarver

Τρωγλοδύτης- hider-in-the-hole

Τυροφάγος- cheese-eater

Μεριδάρπαξ- sliversnatch

i desperately want to be happy. i can feel the ache for it deep within my bones where purest part of my soul screams for it. like without it i will die.

sometimes i think i have it. i let myself get comfortable with the carefree air i carry with me and the laughter that fills my lungs are heart. i feel complete as if i have everything i could ever want and question what it was like to feel alone and hopeless.

and then all of a sudden something slips.

and it is like i have awoken from a wonderful dream to only be thrust back into a cold reality. every interaction i have is made through a sheet of glass, voices muffled and touches separated. and the screaming is back.

i know i will one again be back within the warm realm of belonging where joy seems to reside. but this cycle exhausts me to my core and makes me question if i will ever be permitted to stay bathed in happiness and light.