Eddie Munson has INCREDIBLY strong “survives off of cheap microwave dinners, gas station jerky, school fruit cups, and loose handfuls of sugary cereal” energy. Look at that dude’s face and tell me he has ever eaten a vegetable. He doesn’t know what an eggplant even looks like. Can’t cook for shit. If you say “gnocchi” he’ll say “bless you”.
Synopsis: Pictures say a thousand words - but with polaroid, that means fun.
Warning: Sexy time!, Mentions of sexting/nudes, Language, Teasing, Mutual Pining,
Rating: E - NO MINORS!!
Author’s Note: I recently bought the 1980’s version of a polaroid camera for the summer and it got me thinking - so here this baby was born! It makes me sad that I wrote this on 6/1 and y'all won’t see it until today!
Word Count: 4K
Afficher davantage
This is the worst timeline. (x)
I love that everyone in batman is just like “our sweet prince of gotham <3” and it’s an antisocial thirty year old still stuck in his emo phase
GHOOOST i saw your valentine blurb event and thought i’d drop in something! 🥹
24 hours eddie has been living in my mind rent free and i can’t help but feel like he’s the type to act tough and all that, but instantly melts into a gooey simpy lovesick puddle the second you call him “baby” ❤️ like yeah he likes to be called nicknames like ed or eds, but petnames??? he’s done for. just turns into a blushing blubbering mess. especially with the way he has repressed all his emotions for so long, it’s fun to kind of tease him and call him “handsome” “pretty boy” “baby boy” just to see him break his facade and just unapologetically be the golden retriever that he really is ❤️❤️❤️
i think my favorite thing about this vision is the way he would try to fight it so bad. hiding his face in your neck and blushing all terrible and gaaaaaaaahh. i hope this does it justice <3
warnings: fem!reader. reader is described to be wearing a dress, makeup, earrings, and heels. not edited. set in twenty four hours universe, after the story!
“Eddie!”
No answer.
“Eds!”
No answer.
“Edward Munson!”
Your patience is wearing thin as you finally pop on the back of the earring you had been struggling with. The studs weren’t even anything fancy, hardly worth all the time you’d just spent fighting with it, but you were determined to look nice.
Valentine’s Day. A day meant to be filled with blissful serenity and endless heart eyes, that was really only becoming the bane of your existence.
“I swear to God,” you mumble to yourself, huffing a bit as you try to clean up the mess you’ve made of the bathroom sink. Makeup everywhere, various pieces of jewelry scattered, your curling iron still warm on the edge of porcelain. You decide rather quickly it’s a mess to be dealt with later tonight. Or tomorrow. Or next week. “If he’s still fucking with that bike.”
The sharp clicks of your heels transform as you walk from tile to laminate-wood flooring, becoming a bit more dull and less obnoxious as you take the hallway by storm.
Next year, you’re telling Steve to go fuck himself if he tries to lure you and Eddie into another double date.
“Eddie, we only have thirty minutes until we nee-” you stress as you reach the end of the hall, cutting off entirely as you catch sight of the living room.
Of the living room, and your boyfriend.
“What is that?”
You think you might actually kill him.
“What?” Eddie doesn’t even look up at you, and you make a mental strike against him, “I told you, I’m working on the bi-”
“Yes,” you cut him off, taking a few harsh steps into the very crowded living room, “You were supposed to bring up a part of the bike. Why is the entire bike in our living room, Munson?”
You mean it – you’re going to kick his ass by the end of today.
His bike is propped up there, right in front of the TV, entirely blocking the pathway to the balcony. The bike that should be outside. The bike that certainly has God knows what all over the tires, and is sitting right on your rug you just bought for the living room.
Eddie stops his tinkering with whatever piece he’d removed from the bike to work on on the coffee table, abiding by your rule of having a towel down below it to avoid getting grease everywhere, “What do you mean?”
He’s playing dumb. And he probably thinks he looks cute as he does it, but no amount of fluttering lashes or boyish grins can soothe your irritation.
“You’re an idiot, but you’re not stupid,” you hiss as you cross the room and stand right in front of him, only seeing the crown of his head as he keeps his eyes dipped low in shame, “When did you… How did you…. When the fuck did you bring the bike up?”
You can hardly manage a fluent sentence as you look between Eddie and the bike, mind blown in the truest sense.
His voice is a mere murmur as he fiddles with one of his wrenches, flipping it over a few times before he answers, “While you were in the shower.”
“How?”
“The frat boys downstairs,” he rushes out in one breath, eyes still locked on the ground rather than you. “I, uh, paid a few of them to help me lug it up.”
You sigh heavily, throwing your head back before you move to the couch and dramatically throw yourself down with defeat, “You’re a real pain in my ass, you know that, Munson?”
“You say that like it’s new news,” he says as he twists to finally look at you, eyebrow quirked and the shadow of his dimple making an appearance while he fights a smug smile, “I think you’d be more worried if I wasn’t being a pain in your ass.”
He’s right. It doesn’t slow the roll of your eyes, though.
“You know I love you, right?” you say, suddenly using a sickeningly sweet tone as you lean in closer to where he sits on the ground. His face falls a bit, confusion lacing his brows together, “But, baby, if you keep this up… I’m going to kick your ass.”
He should look a whole lot more scared than he currently does as you deliver the threat, but he entirely throws you off when he grins.
An ear splitting grin, spreading cheek from cheek, radiating with anything but trepidation. He lights up, posture perking up as he looks at you with soft eyes. It looks as though you might have told him you loved him for the first time all over again, as though you’ve just reminded him of how you wanted to spend your life with him rather than said you were going to kick his ass.
The fight and issue at hand is momentarily forgotten as he whispers, “What did you just call me?”
“What did I just call you?” you question incredulously, leaning back fully, wholly concerned now. Maybe you should call Steve and cancel the date, “I- I just threatened to kick your ass, and you’re making heart eyes at me, asking me what I just called you?”
You rewind a bit in your brain, going over the moment again, trying to figure out if you’d let something unusual slip. Deciphering any moment that might have pulled this reaction from him.
You come up empty. Nothing.
“Did you just…” he trails off, cheeks surely aching as they shine with a bit of natural blush, “Did you just call me baby?”
Oh. That.
You look about the room for a second, taking in this predicament you’d gotten yourself into, “Do you not want me to call you that? I just-”
“No!” he rushes to stop you before you can take it back, “I mean, it’s fine. That’s not the issue, I just-”
He cuts off, and you realize just how flustered he is.
Now you’re smiling, right along with him, “You like it?”
“Sort of,” he shrugs, going a bit shy on you now, “It… I mean, if you want to start calling me stuff like that, I don’t mind. It’s fine. It’s cool.”
“Baby,” you say in place of his name, so naturally, like honey. You’re leaning forward once more, entering his orbit as you softly tease, “You’re blushing.”
The words turn him even more scarlet, “Fuck off.”
“What?” it’s your turn to act innocent, rearranging yourself on the couch to be more comfortable, “I thought you said you liked it when I called you stuff like that-”
Eddie movies quickly from the floor, gathering himself up in record time that would have had him groaning in protest on any other occasion. You’ve hardly leaned an elbow back on the couch’s arm when he gets on top of you.
Even if he’s trying to stop you from all your taunting with his words, his kiss says otherwise.
It’s hot, heavy, desperate – like alarm bells might be ringing in his head and telling him to run to the nearest safety of your lips. You welcome him in, of course. Take his lips right between yours with an eagerness to match, forgetting all about the lipstick you’d just applied moments before. Thighs spreading to bring him home to you, arms quickly searching out solace of all the skin below his Deftones t-shirt. Straining biceps as he holds himself over you, squared shoulders as he balances to stay right where he belongs. His chest even heaves ever so slightly with little gasps between kisses, both your lungs needing air despite the magnetic protest between you two.
“God,” you gasp out during one of those short breaks, making him divert a kiss to the corner of your mouth instead, “If you’re gonna kiss me like this every time I call you baby, I should do it more often,” he grunts, and tries to reignite a kiss, probably just to shut you up. You don’t let him, turning a cheek and forcing his searching mouth to plant a peck there instead, laughing a little, “Maybe I should be sure to use the nickname during dinner with Steve, hm?”
“Don’t you dare,” he groans as his lips seek out your jaw and neck next, peppering kisses between words. For each syllable, there’s a smack of his lips against your skin.
You ponder back to the time before you saw this side of Eddie; before someone so soft, so caring, so affectionate existed for you. It’s hard to even recall all those times now with the puddle of a man hovering over you.
“No?” you hum, head thrown back, letting him have his way as your fingers toy with the band around his bun, “What about pretty boy instead?”
Another groan, vibrating against your skin.
“Or handsome?”
This time, he nips the sensitive spot below your ear with his teeth in response.
You gasp, half from the bite and half with faux enthusiasm, “Oh! I know! I’ll take one out of your books and call you sweetheart.”
He finally moans in annoyance, and you know it’s all an act as he faceplants into your chest. You can feel his smile, radiant as ever, muffled by your skin and dress.
“You’re such a pain in my ass,” his echo of your earlier words come out around the cotton neckline, “You know that?”
You ruffle the kinks of his curls at his scalp a little, giving a scratch for good measure, “Yeah. Tell me something I don’t know, handsome.”
The full weight of him falls along your body finally, and he has a boyish glint when he raises his head. Seeking hands find promise along your hips, bunching the fabric of your black dress up into his fists before he’s kissing you again.
A little less hot, a little less heavy, a little less desperate. Just as rewarding as before, though.
Somewhere between simply nice and deathly devoted, you two let your mouths explore at a leisure pace. His lips, the apples of his cheeks, the line of his jaw down to his chin – no space is left unkissed, and you finally notice the smear of red lipstick.
“Oh, shit,” you laugh out, not sounding the least bit sorry as you look at the fading marks left behind, “I got my lipstick all over you.”
When he lifts from the crook of your neck, you catch the stain feathering out around his own lips, a bit smeared along his chin, “And you. I dunno if we can go to dinner lookin’ like this, doll.”
You get it. His reaction to your slip of a pet name.
You have the same reaction as he does it to you, gut fluttering and chest buzzing with tenderness at the sentiments. It’s a simple thing, probably a bit cheesy and cringey to outsiders, but it works between the two of you. You like hearing him grant you the pleasure of a nickname, whether it be sweetheart or doll. You love the hidden devotion beneath the delivery, whether it be idiot or fool.
There’s always an unspoken my in the mix. A certain sense of belonging to him that you can’t really explain to others without being looked at as if you’ve grown a second head.
Why would you want to belong to another person, in any sense of the word?
The answer feels simple enough when you look up at your boy, covered and pretty in Maybelline’s “Ruby for Me”.
“You’re not getting out of this double date,” you whisper back, still toying with his hair, still looking up at him with all the love you’re capable of growing within this chest of yours. It’s a bit more than yesterday, that much you’re sure. Each day, he finds a way to push the limits just a bit more, make a little bit more room behind your ribs for all the affection you hold for him, “If I’m stuck in this impending disaster, so are you.”
He sighs, head slipping into the crook of your neck, “Yeah… Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“Don’t sound so disappointed.”
“Me? Disappointed with you?” he gasps, breath hot on your skin still as he snuggles in a little closer, grips the soft fabric of your dress a little tighter, “Oh, never.”
“Oh, so you decide to sound sarcastic instead?” you’re fighting a grin, trying to find a reason to be mad at him again. Hell, you even glance at the motorcycle in your damn living room to reignite the smallest of sparks – nothing, “You wound me, pretty boy.”
“You’re all about stealing my lines tonight, I see,” he teases as he finally begins to peel himself away from you. He’s all soft – soft eyes, soft smile, soft cheeks, soft flush. Soft, soft, soft. “I guess if there’s no way to convince you to stay home instead of going to this stupid double date, we both gotta get cleaned up now.”
You adore him. If you could bottle up all that softness you’re witnessing with your own two eyes just for a rainy day, you would.
He starts to stand on his knees, moving to leave you entirely and take all that mellow delight away from you too soon, when you lock your heels against his lower back.
Wrapping your legs a little too tightly around his waist, you raise a brow, “You may not be able to convince me to stay home entirely, but… no one ever said you couldn’t convince me to be about, let’s say, ten minutes late.”
He tilts his head at you, eyes wide, “Only ten minutes?”
“Okay, you’ve twisted my arm. Let’s make it fifteen.”
He crashes back into you in an instant, both of you giggling in the process.
With the weight of your pretty boy between your hips, and the caress of his lips against your chest, you accidentally make it nearly thirty minutes late. You don’t really care – not when it comes to Eddie.
Thank you !! I'm happy you liked it! <3
Ethan Landry x GN!Reader
content warning: manipulative ethan; stalking; obsessive; maybe sub!Ethan; mention of murder; he's still ghostface; guilt trapping; worshiping; knife
English is not my first language sorry guys, if i did any grammatical mistakes lmk !
2924 words (7/05/2023)
"Hi" he said simply. As if we were speaking to each other for the first time, but in the same tone with which one greets an old friend. It was ironic how I wished for weeks for him to come and talk to me and when he finally did, all I thought about was running away. He hadn't changed. And so much the better. He was still so handsome. Today, he wore a white shirt and a kind of jeans in a shade between dark gray and black. After taking a brief tour of his outfit, I look up at his face: the most beautiful part of his person. His frizzy curls looked fresh, as if he had just washed them. This thought was confirmed by the smell of shampoo that came to me on a light breeze. His cheeks were tinged with a pale pink that highlighted the small and discreet freckles that sported his cheeks. His gaze escaped mine, watching the floor with a strange and sudden interest as he pressed his lips together in a thin line. He was embarrassed, no, dead of shame. After all, I still hadn't answered him. I've only watched him so far. And I surely would have continued if I hadn't noticed his shaking hands.
What am I supposed to say to him? I greet him too, I compliment him? I ask him directly why he came to talk to me? After all, the only times we had spoken was to get him to tutor me. Are we even friends? After he stood me up without any explanation, approximately two weeks ago now, we haven't spoken to each other since.
“Hi” I simply replied. Ethan scratches his cheek as he smiles nervously at me, his gaze flicking briefly above me to look behind me. The redness on his cheeks getting worse.
“You uh… Your classes, how are you doing ? I… Like, you're good ?”
To be honest, it wasn't. Which is the main reason as to why I was asking him for lessons, by the way. So he knows all about those four out of twenty that I love so much. (Wrong, I hate them, I just don't have the IQ to have more) How handsome he was. Earlier this year, I had this fantasy where Ethan, who I hadn't spoken to at the time, came up to me and asked me out. Later, having learned about his shyness, I dreamed of seeing him overcome his bashfulness to come and declare his love for me while stuttering.
"I manage. And you ? Are you able to follow the program?
Of course he did. We are talking about Ethan Landry, the best student in the whole establishment. He succeeds in everything. Except talking to people, it seems. For the umpteenth time now, he glances over my shoulder. His eyes alternated with bewildering speed between my face and what was behind my back. Finally, I turn to see the only person in the hallway besides us, Chad, watching us with a big smile on his face and thumbs up. He lowers his arms the second my eyes notice him and he puts his hands in his pockets, pretending to turn around.
"Isn't that Chad?" I knew it was him, Ethan's best friend. But I just wanted confirmation.
-N-no aha, it’s… I don’t know who… It’s not Chad.” His laugh was forced and it showed. He was staring at the ceiling, shrugging and laughing nervously. Too smiley to be true. If he weren't already incredibly uncomfortable and flushed, his friend's intervention would have caused him to be.
"Why did you come talk to me Ethan?"
Our last discussion was two weeks ago. We had seen each other on Tuesday for my private lessons and it had gone incredibly well. He had scheduled a session for Thursday, of which I was counting every second until D-Day. I was smiling just reading our messages over and over again. Then Thursday arrived after an endless wait. I headed for the library, as usual. My smile glued to my lips, impossible to remove. I was on cloud nine. But Ethan was late, yet he had never been with me. I waited and waited and waited but after an hour and a half I left. He hadn't sent a message, nothing. Since then, not a word has been exchanged. In the hallways, not even a single look had been shared. We walked ignoring each other, like strangers.
"I'm sorry.
-For what ?"
I had some idea why he was sorry but I didn't want to get my hopes up. His eyes water, he opens his mouth but no sound comes out. Ethan extends his hand towards me which I grab by reflex. To be honest, he was starting to worry me. Was he really going to cry? Was it because of me?
“Ethan, are you okay? I forgive you if this is what bothers you so much but please don't put yourself in such a state. Do you want me to walk you home? I'll tell the teacher that you are not feeling well.” As I said that, I adopted the softest voice I could muster.
The curly man holds my hand, he intertwines our fingers together. His tears finally running down his cheeks. A few tears escape him.
“No… he almost sighs.
-'no' what ? I ask, worried.
-I'm not feeling well…"
My concern increases considerably. Forget him which stood me up. His state is much more worrying. Without really thinking about it, my hand rests on his shoulder. I start guiding him to the exit but he seems to realize it. He plants his feet on the ground, shakes his head, then grabs my hand resting on his shoulder.
Ethan was keeping me here.
He raises his angel eyes to me. He was so handsome. His pupils were glowing. The boy opens his mouth but nothing comes out. Frustrated, his tears seem to intensify. He lowers his head, his beautiful curls falling in front of his eyes that I love so much.
"Ethan, you can tell me anything."
I was hoping he would open up to me a bit more. We were close, certainly not like best friends, but I considered myself loyal enough not to snitch his problems to everybody. Plus, I wasn't lying. He could tell me anything, I will help him as best I can. Ethan runs his thumbs over the backs of my hands, a slight smile on his lips. For a second, he seemed at peace.
“My love… he whispers and I almost thought I was dreaming.
But this peace does not last
-What ?
"I..." His lips quivered.
Did he really call me 'my love'? My heart was beating wildly. He sniffles and tries to swallow back his tears, to no avail. Finally, Ethan snaps.
“I…I can't sleep anymore, I can't do it anymore! he exclaims between two cries. Every time I close my eyes, I see your face. I miss you, I want to continue to give you private lessons, even my homework if necessary. I'lldo them for you. Everything, I'll do everything for you…” he had spoken so quickly that he was out of breath. His tears had not stopped, quite the contrary. He had let go.
His sudden outbusrt make me retreat for a split second. The curly man's hands squeeze mine tightly, as if to keep me from moving further away. I don't understand, my absence has affected him so much? Why didn't he come talk to me sooner, then? And since when does he feel that way about me? His words were excessive and I thought he was going a little too fast. He was so desperate that he saw my face all the time? That he was willing to do 'everything' for me? I thought that my crush was not reciprocated, worse, than he considered me as a simple classmate. If I expected that! But where does this outburst come from?
“Breathe Ethan, breathe.”
Like a child, Ethan nods. He tried to calm his breathing while I tried to slow my heartbeat. I knew Ethan hadn't had a lot of conquests in his life, but I never would have imagined him to be so dependent.
"I'm sorry, really sorry...
-Why are you apologizing?
-I left you alone, I swear I haven't forgotten you. I've been thinking about you all the while i was doing it...
So he was really apologizing for that. But why is he making a fuss about it? I had already imagined this scenario and honestly, I expected an apology, a justification and that was it. Why was he so affected? That guilty? His words got mixed up and in the end, I lost track.
- It's okay Ethan, it's not that important. Is that what stresses you out so much?
- What can I do to make you forgive me?
-Ethan, I already told you, I forgive you, it doesn't matter.
-No, he shakes his head, tell me.
Feeling that if I didn't take matters into my own hands the situation was never going to end, I decided to ask for a simple favor.
-Where were you that day? I ask, alluding to the day he stood me up.
-That's stupid." Despite his words, I give a nod encouraging him to continue. Promise me not to be afraid.
-Why would I be afraid of you Ethan? I ask, laughing softly. He's an angel, how can you be afraid of him?
-Promise me."
His fingers gripped my wrist tightly. It almost hurt me. For a moment, the thought that indeed Ethan could scare me crossed my mind. However, I thought of it too late.
-I was supposed to be only ten minutes late, and I apologize for that, but you had to be outside your room for me to get in it.
-What ? I ask laughing, not understanding where he was coming from.
-When I got in your room, there was a perfume that was not yours. But I had already felt it somewhere, on someone. And… I-I'm sorry that pissed me off and… I-I thought you were cheating on me and I was scared and… I cried but I kept smelling the perfume of that-
-Ethan, stop here, I don't understand anything. What are you talking about? I was no longer laughing, the strange details he gave me seemed too precise.
His tears flow, without warning, he takes me in his arms and presses me to his chest. He hugged me tightly, I almost couldn't breathe. His face plunges into my neck, which he was soaking with his tears. He kept saying he was sorry over and over while I tried to understand. Was he telling the truth?
-I felt so guilty for hurting them that I didn't dare come and talk to you. I was terrified that you would run away from me when you eventually find out. It was horrible. Never again. Never part from me again, I beg you. I'll die of it.
I felt his every word knock against the skin of my neck. He was whispering, as if telling me a secret. And maybe it was. I was praying that another student would come down the hall and see us but the odds were low, very low. Ethan had cornered me at the end of my class, everyone had left. The sun was already falling asleep outside the window. Panic quickly set in within me.
-Ethan you're crushing me! I wasn't even sure he heard me since buried in his chest, my voice was muffled.
-I thought you were cheating on me b-but… I’m sorry for thinking that, sorry sorry sorry sorry...
What did he do ? Who was he talking about when he said “having hurt them”? Where is the shy Ethan who softened my heart? Unconsciously, I start to shake. My arms try to tear themselves away from the grip he had on them but he was crushing me too hard; I couldn't move. His arms clung to mine along my body.
-I should never be mad at you again, ever again. Do you forgive me ?
That's when it comes back to me; the framework. Coming home the evening of the day Ethan and I ended our relationship, my frame was splintered to the ground. The shards of glass had been flying all over my room. The photo remained intact; a picture of me and my roommate, but the frame was dead. I hadn't given more importance than that to the situation itself, my window was open and then said roommate was at home during the day. I just thought that a draft had knocked it down or that my friend was clumsy: it happens after all.
No, it was him.
-Ethan, I speak in a shaky voice, please let me go.
-No ! he yells. You promised me ! You promised me you wouldn't be afraid of me!
-E-Ethan please….
- I'm sorry, i'm sorry !
Ethan, six feet tall, collapses to his knees in front of me. He buries his face in my stomach, his arms wrapping around my waist. He speaks in my skin, muttering countless excuses and promises. Immediately seizing the opportunity, I grab him by the shoulders and push him with all my might to the ground. Surprised, he let me go. His back hits the floor, he lets out a plaintive moan mixed with his cries. Without thinking, I turn my back to flee. But Ethan is strangely fast. He gives me a powerful kick in the shin which in turn makes me fall on my stomach.
Ethan is crying. His cheeks are drowned in tears and red. I don't find him as handsome as before when he slightly pulls up his t-shirt to pull a knife out of his pants.
"Why are you doing this to me ?" he growled, his face lowered to the ground. So far, he's let it go. But there, his energy had changed. He was a murderer.
I crawl on the ground, moving away from him, my eyes filled with terror. I will die. I'm going to die here, alone, killed by the boy I loved. Ethan towered over me, taking small steps towards me.
“I'm begging you…” I cried.
I was desperate, there were no more solutions. I thought, as I disappeared, maybe Chad would figure out who my killer was, since he was the last one to see me other than Ethan.
"You told me you wouldn't be scared..." he pouted as he crouched down on top of me. Afterwards, his actions keep surprising me as he sits on my pelvis. He had fun bringing his knife to my neck and caressing me with it. The coldness of the metal makes my hair stand on end and shivers appear all over my body.
"Ethan, please take that away from me... yelling at him wouldn't get me anywhere, so I was begging.
- No, don't be afraid. You know very well that I will never hurt you.”
His promises, I wanted no more. I wanted him to leave me alone, forever. My hands were free, yet I no longer controlled them. They were completely flat on the ground. I couldn't lift a single finger.
“Do you want me to prove my devotion to you? the curly boy points the knife at him.
The sharp tip of the weapon is now to his throat. Ethan looks at me and smiles. His free hand lay comfortably flat on my chest, holding me firmly to the floor. The vision unfolding in front of me was horrific. I was praying that he wouldn't be able to take his own life in front of me, on top of me! I didn't want to see it though, my eyes refused to look away. I was terrified that he would plant me without warning.
- You love me too, right? he asks, stroking my cheek with his thumb. Tell me that you love me. You love me so much, my love. You love me so much you're ready to die for it.
-Ethan listen…
-Answer." he orders.
The roles had switched. He had given me a position of superiority, adoring me, throwing himself at my feet for even a pardon, but he was sick of it. And now not even my pleas will reach him.
“Imagine how romantic that would be, huh? May the students meet us tomorrow morning, both dead and entwined. It would be wonderful.” His smile was that of a sick man. What more do you need, my death? You want me to stick this pretty little knife in my heart for you? That I tear it down and give it to you as an offering? Come on, tell me you love me. I know you do.”
Finally, I manage to close my eyes. His description had managed to repel me enough to allow my brain to kick in the survival instinct. Ethan laughs mischievously. I feel him move, all his weight crushing my body. His lips settle on my neck for a second.
“You want me to kill myself, huh? I'll kill myself because of you. All because you don't love me. How can you be so selfish? he kisses my cheek. Tell me you love me, my love. I need it. His thumb passes over my eyelid gently, making me open my eyes.
I knew I was stuck. He was one step ahead of me, physically and mentally speaking. He had me stuck. My eyes were red and swollen.
-I… I love you… I whisper, choked cries leaving my mouth at the same time.
-Where is my first name, pretty ?
And to think that I was dreaming of saying those words to him a few minutes earlier.
-I… I love you Ethan… The curly man's face lights up, a gaping smile erasing his crazed expression.
- There, it was not so complicated now, was it?"
That was my first story in english. please do not hesitate to gives me advices whatsoever, like if you think that the plot was too quick, ethan too out of character, not enough details, everything ! I hope you liked reading it anyways.
Spider x Human!Gn!Reader
Masterlist if you want to read my other things.
TW/CW: angst? with happy ending, reader is disabled (leg deformity, they can't walk long), reader is in an existential crisis, both are 18-19, one of reader's leg is bigger than the other.
I feel like reader's only personality is to be disabled??? i really hope it doesn't look like it to you. i feel like this is also cringe. I have no idea how to make romantic scene guys I'm sorry i've never held anyone's hand. I also feel like he's ooc
i got some kind of blank page syndrome and couldn't write anything for days (months) and i feel like i regressed in writing
I also really need to publish this it's taking so much place in my drafts. It's not amazing but it's not so bad either. Don't worry, Ethan Landry fic are coming.
(28/10/2023) (9 172 words)
Everyone was in a rush at the lab. You knew they were preparing an expedition. Norm would come talk to you soon, you wonder what stupid excuse he'll invent this time.
Something along the lines of 'it's dangerous', 'we won't be long', bla bla bla. You're used to it by now.
You suppose you're old enough to go back on Earth, now. But you were staying here with Norm since your parents did so years before. They died in the big war with Jake Sully. Well, your mother did survive, as to why you're here. But she only had the strength to give you life before losing her. So, yeah, you never really had a family, nor did Spider.
So, to compensate, he founds himself the Sullys, his new family. And you had Norm and your studies. It was all you had here. The problem is that what you considered your true family was him, Spider. He hated humans. Even though he was one. And, somehow, you understand him. So, you suspected he wasn't really fond of you. At least not anymore.
Especially since you were continuing your researches on Pandora's fauna and flora instead of simply accepting it and living with it as it is. Without trying to understand it and simply living with it.
Norm enters your dorm and smiles at you, as you predicted. You smile back. He starts his speech as usual: asking if you're okay, if you slept well, if your researches are progressing, if you're not too bored. And finally, he tells you the real reason of his presence here.
"We discovered this grove, you know ? Plants out there have exceptional medical virtues that we're yet to study.
-Good, when are we going ? "
The embarrassed face of Norm told you that it wasn't that simple.
"About that..."
Norm clears his throat. He begins a round walk in front of you to evacuate his anxiety.
"You don't have an avatar. It's well too dangerous to bring you with us. With the others, we decided that you should stay here. It's the best for you. And, you know, with your leg... he scratchs his forehead, embarrassed. We won't be long anyway and we'll bring back some of the flowers to study them here. You won't miss anything.
You knew he was lying. Firstly, despite the fact that you don't own an avatar, everyone on the team have one. For this reason, they won't have any difficulties in escorting you. Moreover, there is few to little predators interested in harming Humans. The only danger to which you are exposed therefore comes down to the environment in general. Which is mountains, severe weather, falls or any other natural obstacle that are easily avoidable things if you are on the back of one of the avatars of the team.
Secondly, you know for a fact that Norm won't collect any flowers. He forbids it. To him, and the team, disrupt the natural cycle of Pandora is a direct outrage to Eywa. If a plant grows at a certain place, then you shouldn't disturb it. Eywa knows and predict everything. Each molecule has a place and a role to play in this planet. At best, Norm will bring back a single petal to study but that will be all.
Clearly, you're not allowed to come because you're a burden.
"I'll be alone?"
He looks surprised for a moment. Norm probably wasn't expecting you to be so cooperative. But hey, what more can you do? They all already think you're a kid, freaking out now will only confirm that.
"Mike will be there. If you need help, just go to him directly in his quarters."
Mike is unsociable. He never leaves his laboratory except for vital needs. Plus, even though he stays with you, he's really sarcastic and sometimes hurtful. What Norm is telling you is that you'll be alone.
"When will you be back?
-Probably in two or three days. It won't be long."
Norm smiled softly at you. You don't smile back. He places his hand on your head, as if to reassure you.
"Don't do anything stupid while we're gone, huh? I'm counting on you."
Either way, it's not like there's much you can do here. There is nothing stupid to do. Norm tells you that you'll have to warn Spider if you see him, then he smiles at you, taking you in his arms. His hand strokes your back comfortingly.
"We'll be back soon, don't worry. If you're bored, I have old movie tapes in my room. But not a word to Jake, that idiot would be able to steal them from me."
You believe it was a joke. After all, you and Jake weren't close. Since he started a family, he seems to pretend to know nothing about Humans. Besides, why would you be friends with a forty-something married with children? It was obvious that you weren't going to tell him anything.
But Norm was repeating how Jake too was disabled and how you two could bond and he'd teach you plenty of things and... Seriously, what the hell ? No, you won't bond with him. You don't care that he was in a wheelchair for Eywa's sake. It's not a funny common point.
And you found it mostly humiliating how Norm simply saw you as the fragile weak kid. You have a personality too, you're not only disabled. You like things, you do things in your free time. You're not dying. But he seems to forget that too often. You're nineteen (less ? or more? You can't tell) ! You're not a kid anymore, you know how to handle yourself!
After a few final goodbyes, the avatars leave the lab. You watched them leave from the windows, tears of frustration buried deep inside of you. It was so unfair how you were always alone. You were born here. You have the right to want to explore, right? But no, always always always alone. It's frustrating.
Besides, you didn't feel comfortable alone here. There was not a sound. Only the fine roar of the machines in the background. You could hear your heartbeat as if shared by a speaker. With every step you took, the metal floor echoed throughout the base. You couldn't stand the noise: it made you anxious. You had the terrible feeling of being lost, alone, in the middle of space.
Finally, you returned to your room. You threw yourself head first on the bed, smothered your tears in your cushion and then slept for a while. To lull yourself to sleep, you ran your fingers through your hair and scratched your head. When you woke up hours later, nothing had changed. That same anxiety-inducing silence still resided. You stood up, then stared dreamily at the vegetation outside the base from the main hall window.
To be a Na'vi, what a dream. Browse these lands without worrying about anything. Flying on the back of an Ikran. To jump, climb, run in Pandora. Breathe its air. What would you give to be able to do so. What would you give to finally live.
To take your mind off things, you immerse yourself in your studies. You always do that, anyway. There was this flower which, surprisingly, was curative for Human but toxic for the Na'vi.
You begin by taking various samples when the heavy door of the laboratory opens with a loud hiss. Spider comes in, a big silly smile on his face that quickly fades when he sees you. There's not a sound when your eyes meet and a duel begins.
You, wondering where he had been wandering again to come back this dirty. Him, probably thinking that you have no life to work all day like you do. As usual, his cheeks are bright red. Because of his running around all day, he always come back sweating bucket and looking like a crayfish. He looks away first to rush straight to his room, without a word. You chuckle bitterly.
Yeah, he really hates you.
It was several hours later that you decided to stop your activities. You had tried to waste as much time as possible on that damned plant but who were you trying to lie to. It was terribly pointless, brimming with boredom.
You didn't check to see what Spider was up to since he got here. You were hoping he had showered. At least the body. He had a habit of putting his dirty hands all over the lab. You complain but sometimes you wish he had his hands in your business. At least you two would talk. Even for something as simple as scolding him.
He was the only boy your age. You used to play as kids. But with years, you drifted apart. As soon as you were both fifteen, towards puberty, he left and preferred his adventures. Somehow, you can't blame him. You would have done the same if you could.
The lab was still quiet. Too calm, perhaps. Your mind wandered to the boy living here. How was he so quiet? Usually he enjoys jumping and running around. Maybe you're disturbing him? He's not used to you two being alone together in the lab. And since you don't talk to each other as much anymore, maybe he's embarrassed to go out?
It's silly, you live here and it's impossible to avoid someone on such a small base. You see each other constantly. Well, if he doesn't love you, there's nothing you can do about it. Despite your sadness. You smile weakly. It's that you two had fun when you were kids. You so wish you could talk to him without just asking about Norm or the team…
Ready to go back to your room, you check one last time that you've put the equipment away correctly before turning around. Your action barely started that your chest collides with someone's body. Your heart misses a beat.
You jump and step back, your lower back hitting the desk causing a whine of pain to escape from your throat. You close your eyes, catching your breath as your hand rests on your chest as if to stop your heart from breaking out. Has he been there long? He was waiting behind your back without saying anything? Why get so close to you?
"Spider!" you sigh. "Don't do that again, I almost had an attack…"
He stands in front of you, arms crossed high over his bulging chest and chin proud. Why is he standing like that? Who is he trying to impress? You look him up and down for a moment. He cleaned himself and he doesn't smell bad. He really showered ? That's a miracle. Your gaze must have been more insisting than you thought since he seems to curl up on himself, lowering his eyes to the ground.
"You uh… do you need anything?" you ask, calming your heartbeat still rapid after such a fright.
“Where's everyone? He asks. Of course he'd ask that.
You pass by him, towards the hallway of the dormitories. You don't show it but you are terribly uncomfortable talking to him. You're embarrassed ? You can't really pinpoint it.
-They're gone exploring a place. They should be back in a few days." you answer without looking at him.
Not a sound. Yet you know he's still there, in front of the desk, staring at you. What was he waiting for? He acted weird. Spider was surprising, it's the least you could say, but he's not one to sneak up on people. Usually he jumps on them screaming.
"You're alone ?" To this, you only respond with a hum.
You didn't expect the discussion to last this long to be honest. You who wanted him to talk to you so bad, were more uncomfortable than anything else.
Recently, you have memories of your childhood that come back when you look at him so you avoid his face as much as possible. It was last night, an old memory came back to you. The two of you, hiding under the bed. You were laughing for nothing. You must have been ten or eleven. You kissed before giggling like idiots.
"But Mike is in his room." you add. Even though he knew as well as you that meant you were alone.
You don't know why you remembered this moment. It was weird too, considering Spider was with Kiri now.
"Where did they go?
-I don't know, Spider. They went to explore somewhere."
It was as if he wanted to force the discussion. He followed you down the hall until you came to your bedroom door. He was behind you again. His chest inches from your back. You wondered for a moment why he seemed so attached to you.
"You uh… Do you want to come with us later? We're going to watch the eclipse and it's really beautiful so…
The face of the Sullys appears before your eyes like a distant memory. You try to unlock your room but the presence of the boy behind you stresses and disconcerts you.
"Thank you Spider, I'll consider it.
-Oh, you have something to do first? What are you working on?
You frown before finally turning to face him. He takes a few steps back noting your abusive proximity. His face was flushed but his eyes never left yours.
-I thought you weren't interested?
It's not that you thought, in fact, you were sure of it. He had told you himself that what you were doing was boring, several times. So you were rather surprised.
"It's just…" Finally, he sighs and doesn't finish his sentence. "We'd be really happy to spend time with you."
You had doubts on that. Neteyam is the portrait of his mother. He doesn't like humans. For him, you're an alien. Lo'ak probably doesn't know you. At least he must not have noticed your existence. You're just a regular scientist to him, like the dozens there already is.
Kiri only talks to you when she wants to see her mother. And even then, she usually asks her questions to Norm. Tuk has surely never seen you. Neytiri, her mother, doesn't like knowing her close to you and to 'sky people' in general.
And Spider, ah, Spider. Spider ignores you. He never asked you to leave the lab with him again since your 'separation'. The day he decided he wasn't your friend anymore.
"Oh really ?" It was ironic. And it was obvious.
Spider was embarrassed. Your fault, surely. But you had your reasons. You didn't give yourself the opportunity to think about it, but it had hurt you. Enormously. It's so hard to be in your position. The only child like you, your age, decided to cut you out of his life overnight.
You only have him. He's the only reference you have. You don't even know what human children look like! You wanted to grow with him, discover Pandora with him! But, hey, guess he doesn't want someone who can't even move. It's humiliating to think that the only young person of the same race as you, hates you. Would it have been the same on Earth? You would have been hated?
You spent years growing up alone, without friends. Because Norm isn't for sure close to a friend. He can be considered as your father figure but not someone you'd share your secrets with. When was the last time you played hide and seek ? When was the last time you played tag ?
You don't know, days, months and years are all blur in your mind. Everyday is the same. Days are mixing into each other.
"They don't really have opportunities to talk to you, so the eclipse is a good way to get to know each others. The Sully are really cool, you know.
Probably even nicer than you if he abandoned you for them. He's lying, too. Because there are plenty of opportunities here in the lab as you never move far. If they really wanted to talk to you, they would have.
-I can't walk in Pandora with my leg, Spider. You know it." your tone was harsh, wanting to make him realize just how little he knows of you now.
The truth is, you can walk. You can try to train your body to walk longer but you need to be accompanied to do so. You can't walk alone in the forest of Pandora. You can fall, you can get attacked, get lost. Anything. But nobody wants to help you. So you're stuck in the lab and the more you're stuck, the less you walk and you lose the habit of walking and your body weaken. It's a vicious circle, really.
Norm simply gives you an treatment and everyone call it a day. It's a sort of machine which massage your muscles to soften or muscle them or something. You don't do it anymore. So it's not important. You don't blame Norm, he's a busy man. He tells you to apply some cream to ease the pain, you don't do it either.
All of this to say, you won't go with him. Because there is high chance your leg will just give out before them and it'll be the most shameful event of your life. And since thinking is all you can do here, you'll think about it until your death. So it's a big no.
-But I thought you could still walk?
-But I thought I was 'too weak and broken' ?"
Spider is left speechless before you. Mouth gaping and searching his words. He said that to you multiple times as kids. Norm had told him you weren't, which was true. But Spider meant no harm by saying that as you'd always tell him he was 'stupid'. It was a fair exchange, really. Just two stupids kids nagging each other. So yeah, maybe you went really low on this one.
But you were hurt and you weren't kids anymore.
You already spent years alone, what's some more ? You could talk to him, tell him how you missed him, how you forgive him and go with him stare at the eclipse, but you don't. Instead, you widen the gap between you. Probably because you hate yourself so you want to ruin your own life, loving to be tortured. The door finally unlock before you.
You look at Spider one last time, offering him a tight lip smile and enters your room, closing the door shut behind you. You stay put beside the door, staring at your room mindlessly. You had no reasons to come here in the first place, but you wanted to escape him.
Glaring at your bed, you decide another nap would do you good. You just have to make the days pass by quicker so everyone come back and you're not alone with him anymore.
Sometimes, you wonder how they're doing on Earth. If it would have been better if you were there instead of Pandora. Because being on a beautiful planet like this one without being able to explore it and being considered an alien is pure torture. The worst is that you'll never get an avatar, it being too expensive. Or so the other scientists told you.
You'll just stay here, being the fragile human, weaker, smaller, with a shorter life.
Then you think about Spider: Why did he suddenly want to bring you outside ? Why did he want you to be with his friends ? Why did he even talk to you ? Why did he leave you ? And, finally, the question haunting you, would he do it again ?
Staring at the cream on your nightstand, you think putting some again wouldn't do harm. Just in case you want to try to walk outside. Just in case. Staring at your leg with your medicine smeared in your palm, you observe how it's all swollen. You poke it with your index, a mark is left.
You massage your sore muscle, asking yourself if this is really working or if that is only a placebo effect. Once everything is done, you place your legs beside each others and compare them. You chuckle humorlessly in seeing the size difference.
You'll never be able to explore Pandora.
When you were still a kid, Spider and you asked for a room with windows. Lot of them. This way, even past your curfew you'd still be able to see outside. Even though you had bunk bed, you were always finding a way to sleep on the ground to face outside.
Tomorrow, we'll go there, he'd say, I'll show you this tree, he'd say, Jake brought us there, he'd tell you. And he was always honoring his words and brought you everywhere.
For a while, it was perfect. Because as you were always walking, your legs were gaining muscle ! But Spider always wanted to go further and further and further to the point where he just couldn't take you with him.
You didn't understand at first because he always had time for you. He was having fun with his 'siblings', the sully, but he would still come back to the lab to play with you. But then he just stopped. When he was coming back to the lab, it was really late in the evening and he was out like a light.
Then he grew up and you went separate ways, he had his own room, you had yours. And no windows could be seen in yours. Because now, you hate looking outside.
You don't want to sleep, but you're bored and wants to pass the day. You walk mindlessly in circle, thinking of what you could do without leaving your room. At first, you try to paint, but you're quickly bored. You try to read a book but as you already read them multiple times, you're quickly bored, too.
You write, draw, try to sleep but you can't shake the uneasy feeling inside of you. Why did he come talk to you ? What does he want ? You're on your back, slotted comfortably between your cushions when you realize that your throat is dry.
You're thirsty. So you have to drink, outside of your room. You sigh, passing your hand on your forehead. You hope deeply Spider left because you seriously don't want to talk to him right now.
You get up without a sound, putting your ear against the door to see if someone's here. No sound, good. You rush straight to the kitchen like area. You're delighted when it is indeed confirmed that no one is inside.
No one is inside.
You should have checked before because outside the base, a few meters away from the windows, you see Spider, Kiri and Lo'ak sat on the grass laughing together. You tense, you turn your back to them, praying they don't see you.
You grab a glass of water at the speed of light, but too slowly as the heavy door of the base open. You drink it in one time, put it back on the counter and start leaving.
"Hi...! calls Kiri, embarrassed. She knew you were trying to leave, that's why she sounds sorry.
You freeze. You can't ignore her, she did nothing wrong. You'd just be mean. So you turn your head a little, smiling politely. Spider isn't here, nor is Lo'ak. You're reassured.
-Hi Kiri. Norm is not here at the moment but you have free access to the laboratory if you want. you recite, used to this same discussion.
-I know, Spider told me."
She was oddly embarrassed. Now it was starting to get really weird. First Spider and then Kiri? Why do they all look uncomfortable? Did you do something ? Do you have something on your face? Kiri was the kind of person to be quite frank with other. She wasn't mean by any ways, of course, not to you at least. She was simply honest. So you know something is up when she doesn't look you in the eyes.
You stare at the security displate on the door behind her to distract yourself, how in case of a fire the exit is in the common area, how the masks allowing you to breath the outside air can also filter the smoke.
And Kiri doesn't say anything, but the door open another time. Spider enters and you want to flee at the sight. You purse your lips, not knowing if the discussion was over or not. Kiri looked like she wanted to tell you something but she wasn't uttering a word. Is it rude of you to leave ?
You try to read the security displate again, extinguishers are a little everywhere on the base. Did a fire already start here ? It's possible, after all. Still, it seems impossible as every scientist here is cautious.
As you were engrossed in your reading, a shock-like launch take over your leg. You grit your teeth and frown, hoping no one notices. You hated being seen like this.
Especially in front of the Na'vi, in this case Kiri. The Omatikaya were strong, proud. You couldn't even stand for more than twenty/thirty minutes.
So you didn't like hanging out with the Sullys. They ran, jumped and played happily all over Pandora. When it was impossible for you to do so. But it was your planet, too.
Kiri clears her throat, giving a look to Lo'ak still outside in the grass. He was laughing. At you ? You don't know, but Kiri seemed to be asking him for help. Are you making her nervous ? Now, you feel bad. You didn't do anything, you don't want her to be uncomfortable to just talk to you.
You don't know where is Spider, you don't want to look for him. You just know he's in the room with you.
-By the way, tonight we're all going to observe the eclipse so I thought you could come? I'm sure you'd have a lot of fun. she tried to sound casual but his words sounded fake, as if repeated. Why is she offering you to come? You're not even friends. Did Spider ask her to do so?
-Thank you Kiri, Spider already offered to me. I think I'll pass my turn. There will always be other eclipses in the future. you stay silent, analyzing her body language. Is there... A problem ?
Kiri shakes her head, assuring you that everything's fine. But you can't believe her when they've been acting so strange. Did Spider talk about you to her ? And if yes, why? And what did he say ?
The three of you are staring at each other in utter silence. Your two interlocutors deeply uncomfortable and getting fidgety. Kiri gives you a tight lip smile, as if she knew how weird and awkward the whole situation was. As if she's giving you support.
You then stare at Spider, who you tried to forget a few minutes ago. Maybe he could answer your confusion as he seems to be the one linking everything together. He smiles at you, cheeks once again bright red. Eywa, this is just too embarrassing.
"I'll have to go back to my room so..." you say, already backing off, thumb pointing toward your fleeting.
You don't 'have' to go back but you really want to avoid this mood. You might die from embarrassment in being stared at by two people without them talking.
Your leaving awake Kiri. She almost scream at you to wait and you halt in your track, startled by her sudden outburst. You think she is blushing, terribly uncomfortable, but it's hard to tell as her skin is blue. But it look like it's now a little more purple. Truly fascinating.
-I think Spider wanted to show you something. Right Spider ? Kiri exclaims, staring insistently at the boy sitting on a high chair a few feet away from you.
-Me ? No, why ?
-I'm sure you do, come on, I know you remember…" Kiri gritted her teeth, glaring at the boy. She was almost desperate, wanting him to help her out of the hole she was digging.
What is happening ? What are they talking about ? Something to show you ? Is that why Spider been so weird to you since this morning ? Why didn't he just showed it to you? He doesn't have to ask Kiri for help.
-I don't think that is... he's cut off by the cold tone of Kiri.
-Spider...
With the death glare she sent him, he quickly stood up away from the chair. He looks behind him, to the window, Lo'ak smiles at him. Why isn't he just coming in ? Why is he just laughing at everything going on ? Is this an inside joke ? You don't find it funny. Are they making fun of you ?
Spider walks up to you, step by step while Kiri back off. He clears his throat, that's when you notice he's hiding something in the pit of his hand.
-I did… well, no. I found, yeah, I found that and kinda thought about you, well, about your behavior ? But, uh, so I took it. he lifts his hand to your, a bracelet in his palm. Here. you frown.
-You found a bracelet already made? Isn't it just someone else's bracelet ?
How, in this huge and vast forest, did he even find it ? And what does he even mean by your behaviour ?
-No, I...
-You could get in trouble Spider, you should try to see if someone lost it.
You were worried because even thought Spider tried to remove you from his life, you were still scared for him. He was a human, he wasn't accepted in the Omaticaya tribe. If one of the Na'vi found out he 'stole' something, he'll be done for. He's been mean to you, but you know he doesn't deserve to be alone.
And why is Kiri cheering him up. Isn't she supposed to tell him it's bad ? Is she trying to sabotage him? No, she wouldn't do that. Well, she doesn't really look like she'd be mean anyway.
Kiri rolls her eyes and shakes her head. You don't understand.
-Seriously Spider, you should put it back where you found it. you insist.
He closes his eyes shut and sigh. Head going low. He looked frustrated and embarrassed. You noticed that Kiri walked away to leave you two more privacy. You preferred when she was closer.
-Okay, maybe I... didn't find it.
This make no sense. He did it himself ? Someone gifted it to him ? In both case, it's nice. So why would he lie to you on something like this ? What's got into him today ?
-Why would you lie to me ? on something like that, that is. It's just a small bracelet, nothing to be lying for.
-Listen, I... I made it. For you. Kiri helped. Please, come with us watch the eclipse tonight. The Sully want to meet you.
Meet you? But you're here. You never go far. They already met you. What is this about ? Is this bracelet a simple gift or something with a deeper meaning ? You know Na'vi have certain traditions, like gift giving to court a mate. But you're not his mate and Spider isn't really a Na'vi, still, he lives like one.
But most importantly, aren't Kiri and Spider together ? Are you misinterpreting things ? Surely. Because why would he starts to court you after avoiding you for years ? When he's already in a relationship! Is he trying to reconnect with you? Or he simply realized that you're the only one to be of the same race as him and he has no other choice.
It's sad but it's a truth. He can't mate with a Na'vi, he doesn't have an avatar. You're his only choice. But you don't want to be the last option. You don't want him to choose you just because you're the two only humans. You'd rather see him ignore you for years again.
-So? Will you come ?
-I don't think.... You start but he cuts you off.
-Why ? I'll carry you on my back if you want ! You want to roll your eyes at the ridiculous aspect of it all.
-Why are you insisting so much Spider ?
-I'll even give you foot massage !
-Ew! You and Kiri exclaim in unison. Spider smiles at your reactions and without really realizing it, you lightly smile as well.
-I swear you'll have fun. Please." he asks you one last time.
So you accepted. Because you realized that you still wanted to be his friend. Because you miss his company. Because Spider is who he is. Because you want to go out desperately.
And that's how you find yourself standing nervously before the Sully in the middle of the forest hours later. The suns barely start to leave the sky, one of them being hidden by the clouds.
Lo'ak greeted you awkwardly while Tuk jumped at the idea of meeting someone new. Neteyam wasn't here with them, it made you feel less stressed as he's the one who scares you the most.
They soon started strolling around with their giant legs, quickly out-speeding you and Spider.
The tree siblings were walking ahead of you, far ahead. Jumping and laughing. But Spider was beside you, smiling. Like the old times. A wave of sadness, nostalgia and shame hit you. You don't even know why you're ashamed. He told you he wanted you to be here. Still, you feel like he forces himself to be kind to you.
"You can speed up, I'm just behind.
-Can't I stay here ? He shrugs while smiling happily.
Well, yes, of course he can. It was just an offer. You shrug, letting him do his own choices.
-It's been a while since our last discussion, I don't want to leave you alone."
Again, you thought. And you think he thought it too by his apologetic look. Is it too late for a new friendship to bloom ? Has time passed too quickly ? You're both adults now. But you still have this feeling pulling at your chest each time you see him. Knowing damn well things didn't end correctly between you.
Your good leg hit against a root on the ground and you lose your balance. Spider is quick to grab your hand to prevent you from falling.
You feel so bad for always needing someone. But you also feel angry. Because it's fun reducing to always need someone company to just walk. You know Spider wants to ask you if you're okay, still, he doesn't. And you really appreciate it.
"So? That flower you've been studying? he asks instead, letting go of your hand slowly, as if he didn't really want to.
You frown at his choice of conversation subject. Spider is not one to like science, at all. It's intriguing because that mean he watched you work for far longer than you thought to know what you were working on.
Then why didn't he just talk to you? Instead of hiding himself behind your back waiting for you to turn around.
-It's progressing. I think we can make medicinal meals for humans with it. It's really interesting.
You didn't want to talk much about it since you knew Spider would be bored pretty quickly. But if he was, he was hiding it damn well because you couldn't see anything but his fond smile.
-That's cool. He says. Tell me more.
You were surprised to say the least. Because never had Spider ask you to explain your works to him.
-Are you sure ? You asked doubtfully
-Well, yeah!"
And he was so excited to hear you that a warm feeling enveloped your heart. You started explaining every progress you made in the past few months, not sparing any details. You knew he didn't understand things sometimes but you were happy to explain it to him more clearly.
Often, you'd have to stop to escalate a fallen tree or some high places but Spider was always eager to help you. Sometimes, the Sully would look back at you two and smile.
At first, you thought that Kiri would join your conversation but maybe she knew you two needed this talk. You were old friend trying to reconnect and she was kind enough to let you have this. She never looked like the jealous type anyway.
When you finished your story, you asked Spider about his dailies activities and he was happy to indulge.
And without really understanding how you made it, you were now on his back while he was walking proudly towards his friends. Honestly, you knew Spider was somewhat of a muscular guy but you'd never thought it was possible for him to carry you for so long like he did.
And when you arrived, you thought he'd be quick to set you on the ground but he didn't. He kept you on his back as long as he could. You just wanted to enjoy your old friend's company, stay in the illusion that nothing ever changed.
The view was really beautiful. A calm place on the edge of the void. Ikran were flying down there, some mounted by omaticaya, other simply loving their freedom. You could see all the floating island from here. And of course, the suns.
Surprisingly, you weren't feeling too tired, yet. Spider was still talking to you but your face on his shoulder, the warmth of his body and the comfort of it all before the beautiful view of Pandora was enough to put you in a trance.
Eventually, when you met the stare of Kiri, you forced yourself to get off him. Because you didn't want to make her uncomfortable.
Your hand wipe away the few water drops on your mask. It's a little frisky out there, but it feels good.
As everyone was laying on the ground excitedly, you sat at the far right of the siblings, leaving a polite space between you. But the space quickly was filled by Spider's body plopping beside you. He smiles, you can't give him the same kindness, mind full of questions.
Why are you here ? Because as much as the scenery is nice, you're not close no any of the people who 'invited' you. What was the plan in making you come here ?
Spider's hands which lay flat on the ground support him, his arms behind his back. He's almost laying down.
"Don't fall asleep." he tells you but you have no idea why he told you that as you're wide awake.
Maybe he's just trying to be nice, trying to be polite and make you feel included. You don't mind it. You're sure this whole rendez-vous together is a one time thing that you'll never do again. So you're fine with it.
Even if you're disappointed. Because you love going out in Pandora.
You concentrate on staring at the scene before you instead of sulking. It was really pretty, you never saw something so beautiful before. Because the last time you went out, you were young and had a strict curfew. You never got to watch the beauty of the nightfall.
Soon, every plants and living beast should light up. You already notice the freckles on the siblings body become clearer. You smile softly. You feel good, at peace. You could stay here forever. It's like you're finally connected to Eywa.
The suns are moving slowly and you're hypnotized by them all, a smile pulling at your lips.
Even if lost in your trance, movements from your left grabs your attention. Spider's thigh is suddenly pressed against yours. You search for his eyes, to see any emotion or reaction explaining you his behaviour but his eyes are solely staring at the sun before you. Why did he move so much closer ?
You shrug, thinking that you're cold anyway and a little of human warmth won't do harm. So you ignore his shenanigans, opting to concentrate fully on the sight. You're lucky to live on such a pretty planet. Even when now, it's a foot that set itself under your leg, taking you once again away from your thoughts.
"Spider?" you ask this time.
Because his foot slided under your sick leg and as it's a somewhat private part of you, you're surprised by the contact. Spider looks at you and smile, his head falling on his shoulder as he held every star of the night in his eyes. Even through the mask, you could see how prettily shiny they were.
You never saw him so comfortable, but when you really think about it, you can't remember much of the time you spent together. It was so long ago. Maybe he was comfortable like that with you before.
Frowning, you stare at your now tangled legs. This is getting weirdly intimate. Just this morning, he was avoiding you like death and now he's craving physical attention? But when you look into his eyes, you can't find any answers.
It's not new, though. You remember when you were little, you were always asking yourself; What is he thinking ? He always has been unpredictable and impossible for you to decipher.
But you stay still, letting him do his things. Because you missed all of this.
"Where is Earth ?" asks Tuk to one of her siblings.
You realize it's the first time you hear them talk and remember their presence. Lo'ak is the one to answer. He points to a really really far star in the sky and you follow his direction. Earth ? That's where you come from ? You're sure it's beautiful out there, too.
Feeling confidence running through his veins, Spider finally glides his hand to lay it on yours, putting his fingers between yours on the ground.
"Do you think there is a deity like ours on Earth?" asks Kiri and your blood run cold.
Kiri, Spider's lover. She's just beside you. You hope she did not see that. You forgot they were together. As if an electricity shock cross your body from head to toe, you push his hand away and move your leg out of his hold, in your rush, you hit it against the ground and whimper.
Spider try to touch your leg, probably worried about your health but you don't want him to touch you anymore.
"What are you doing ? you ask, throwing worried glances to Kiri who wasn't looking. He halts his hand in the air before retracting it silently.
-I... Nothing. Sorry." he's deeply confused. But you are more.
His head turns in the opposite direction of your, his body language telling you he's terribly tense. What is he doing ? Why was he all over you ? What the hell was that ?
Is he seriously flirting with you? When Kiri is barely one person away from you ! He probably doesn't know you're aware of his relationship with her and is trying to get in your pants. Thinking that hurt your heart deeply. Staring at him nervously wrapping his fingers around the plants, you're not so sure he's a cheater.
No, you conclude. He would never play with her heart like this.
But he changed with years. He was a man now. Maybe he wasn't the Spider you used to know, after all. No, you need to stop imagining things. You just need to talk to him, understand his thoughts. Spider is nice. He probably changed but not like this. You can't even force yourself to believe Spider would be a bad person.
The rest of the eclipse, you didn't get to enjoy it as much as you wanted. Too preoccupied by your boiling mind. And soon, it was already time for everyone to get back home.
Your little group stands up, the siblings and Spider talking excitedly together. Spider was still by your side though. You were thankful that even despite the awkward situation you two were in minutes prior, he was still making sure you weren't being left out.
After some time, you noticed that Spider wasn't trying to be part of the conversation anymore, his steps were slowing down. He tentatively looked at you and your eyes met his.
"Are you mad at me ? he finally asks.
-No. You say, because you truly were not. Just confused.
-Confused about what ? I thought I was pretty clear back there.
-Your intentions were indeed pretty clear, don't worry about that. I just... It's really low of you to do that with Kiri just beside us.
-What does Kiri have to do with this?
You hate that he's playing dumb. And you get more frustrated the more you're talking to him. By now, you two stopped walking, standing in the middle or the forest without moving.
-I don't like you playing with her. You should stop.
Spider's eyes widen, he steps back a little, looking agape. His lips forms words but no sound come out of it. Why is he so surprised ? Isn't it logical for him to settle to one person ? Why does he look like he just got a world's revelation ?
-You thought I mated with Kiri ? asks Spider in a voice so high pitched you're sure the whole forest heard.
The three siblings before you stops in their track and look at you two, surprised faces on all of them before Lo'ak burst out laughing hearing your conversation, as well as Tuk.
There is a long silence between you and the boy only disrupted by the never stopping laugh of the two omaticaya. The girl approaches you slowly. You feel so stupid, you might die from shame. He wasn't playing dumb, the two really weren't together.
Spider turns pale. Kiri looks him up and down before pretending to vomit.
-What ? Me ? With this thing? she says, disgust lacing her words.
You want someone to bury you seven feet under ground.
-Same thing for me ! Spider screams. Everyone, but her!
-He is literally the spitting image of Lo'ak! Why would I mate with him?
-I… I don't know. I always see you guys stuck together so I figured…
You now realize how stupid your reasoning looks. Yes, they spend lot of time together, but so do a family.
-She's not even funny ! She's the worst person to be with !
-Shut up !" Kiri says, pushing Spider strongly. The boy manages to impress you by not moving a lot despite the strength of the Na'vi girl by his side.
Seeing their bother sister dynamic, you instantly knew that they weren't lying. You even wonder how you could ever think of them as a couple.
You feel a lot better knowing Spider was still kind. And knowing you did not betray Kiri. Relief flood in you. Maybe your boy is still as kind as before.
Lo'ak, Kiri and their little sister then decided to head back home after accompanying you to the lab. Tuk was tired, she was being carried on her brother's back while Kiri was in her own head. Spider was much more awake. He was eagerly talking your ear off about some of his craziest adventures with the Sullys.
For a moment, you were at peace.
You had your old friend back, new people next to you who, you hope, you'll soon be able to call friends. The thought of the discussion you and Spider would definitely have later wasn't even plaguing your mind. You were having fun. It was perfect.
As soon as you arrived back at the lab, apprehension was all you could feel. What if it's the last time you see them ? What if they don't want to be your friends ?
They dropped you off at the entrance of the base. Tuk was still sleepy and she mumbled something along the line of 'Goodnight' before going back to her asleep state.
You thanked them, told them you had a great night and they started to leave, not before some farewells.
Lo'ak whispering a 'good luck bro' to Spider which you clearly heard despite him trying to be quiet, he gave him a pat on the back before stepping back. Kiri smiles at you softly then sticks out her tongue at Spider with a teasing look.
As much as this whole scene was cute, your leg was starting to hurt and you needed to sit down quickly before losing your balance.
You wave at the Sully, finally watching their back heading to their home. You're sleepy, but something is preventing you from really falling asleep right then and there: You still have questions.
If he's not with Kiri, that means he was flirting with you. Crafting you a bracelet, wanting you to spend the rest of the day with him, trying to be skin to skin against you; that's flirting, right ? That's what they do in books anyway.
Spider opens the heavy door of the lab for you, you wait for the air to be cleaned before taking off your mask. You hurry to find a seat nearby. What is it now ? Are you friends ?
There is no sound in the whole lab and the mood stresses you. You're alone with him, you can't ignore the awaiting conversation you'll eventually have. Spider grabs a glass of water that he set on the table for you to drink.
You thanks him lowly. He sits on a chair on the other end of the table, facing you. He taps his nails on his chair nervously while you avoid his gaze by staring at your shoes.
"So..." he starts.
Your heart's beating quicken because you don't know what to expect. You're scared. But knowing that Spider is as frightened as you reassures you at the same time.
"Did you have fun ? Tonight ?
-Yeah, it was nice. The sky was pretty. Thank you.
-Cool, cool. It's nice to know."
Spider scratch his head, eyes boring holes into the ground. But he stopped his movements and sighs, brows frowning and creating a crease on his forehead.
"I'm an idiot. He resumes. I don't know why I left you. He stays silent for a while, you let him find his word, desperately wanting to hear his point of view. I guess I was scared. Maybe even ashamed.
Ashamed ? Ashamed of you ? This conversation will really end you if he continues this way.
-Scared because... I don't want you to like me just because I'm your only option. I was scared to think I liked you just because you were the only kid my race I've ever known. At your frown, he smiles bitterly. Yeah, I like you. But now I'm sure it's not because we're the only two human the same age.
You're stunned. Astonished, even. Your mouth is mid open, your eyes are wide. You stopped breathing a few seconds ago. Is he joking ? How does Spider, the guy who stopped talking to you years ago, confesses his love to you? How is he asking the same questions you asked yourself times and times again ?
-And ashamed because I don't want to be human anymore. I want to be a Na'vi, an omaticaya. A true one ! And you, the lab, are reminding me of who I really am. I guess I didn't like that. A long silence spaces his confession, you trying to process everything and him, searching his words. But at the same time, back then I thought that as long as you were with me, I wouldn't mind staying human, you know? But it's a lot of thoughts in a fifteen years old's mind and I just panicked, I guess.
Tears are quickly filling your eyes, you're speechless. You've been waiting for him to explain himself for so long and finally it was happening. You want to cry because it's the first time someone is openly telling you about their emotions, you want to cry because you have no choice but to confront your own emotions now. But you don't know how to handle them. You wipe aggressively your eyes, trying to make it look like you got something in it, you know Spider is not believing it but you still try to hide.
He'd stay human for you ?
-I have no excuses. I'm just an idiot. You never deserved to be left alone. And...And It's okay if you're a little broken because you're wonderful. It balances out. He says on a lighter note at the end.
And his silly confession made you smile. As stupid as it sounded. Because how is this his first words after years of mutual avoidance ? He just can't be serious. You're overwhelmed, you thought this day was going to be like every other day. None of this was planned. You don't know how to react.
-You won't forgive me right away, I know it. But I'm ready to wait. I'm... Kiri taught me how to sew. I-I can sew you clothes, jewelry, even a shawl. And I'm much stronger now, I can bring you everywhere. I'll make you visit lot of pretty places. I'll carry you.
You don't like that his offer is so tempting to you. Because you would have liked to make him wait, make him understand how hurt you are. As selfish as that sound, you just wanted for him to sympathize.
-Not even in a romantic way, we-we can just be friends, just like before. It'd be really nice.
Yes, it'd really be nice. You don't want to wait anymore. You missed him, your friend, so much.
-Why today ?
-What ?
-Why did you choose to come see me today? What pushed you to do so?
He chuckles, crossing his arms on his chest and staring at the ground.
-Lo'ak and Kiri forced me. Because I've actually been crafting you things for years but never gave them to you. He lacked courage. But they thought I did. They discovered it somehow and started reproaching it to me and told me that if I did not come talk to you to apologize, they would do it themselves.
Really now ? You're curious? Why has he been crafting you so much ? Okay, you think. You're ready to open your heart a little bit, just for him. But not entirely ! He has to work for it. He has to wait a little as well. Because, well, he never forgot about you. And that's enough for you to let your guards down.
You'll have to thank Lo'ak and Kiri next time you see them at the lab. You owe them.
-So ? Can I have another chance?"
Hi I was wondering if you wrote or if you will write a part 2 to neighbour Ellie x reader, cause I would love to see how their relationship will progress and maybe there can be a bit of jealous Ellie and insecure reader, in like maybe they meet their exes or something like that
neighbor!ellie x sunshine!fem reader, hurt + comfort / fluff / smut MDNI!! or we’re beefing!! / established relationship, wc: 5.2k
synopsis: things between you and ellie seem to be going great! that is until you pay her a visit at work to drop off lunch and find that the threads that tie her and an overfriendly coworker tangle too much for your liking.
content warnings: language, slightly mean!ellie makes a return, reader isn’t necessarily insecure, but a little unsure of the circumstances, 18 + content / filthy make-up sex that consists of: brief shower-sex, scissoring, fingering / oral (reader & ellie!receiving), thigh-riding, so much kissing and mushy feelings.
author’s note: in love with this idea ! been mulling over how to expand on their relationship & i feel like this is a great segue ! hcs below; leave some more scenarios for existing couples (emt!abby, collegebff!ellie or others) and i’ll answer them ! (also not proofread well like usual lmao)
main masterlist | tlou masterlist
jealous!ellie & jealous!reader are SO different, but i feel like the outcome would be so…YUM.
feel like you’d be more reserved about being jealous.
like lately, it seems like things between you and ellie seem like they can’t get any better.
the two of you spend so much time together, whether it’s having picnics in the park with some pastries you make, testing out recipes after close at your cafe or having sleepovers at one or the other’s apartment.
ellie’s lowkey obsessed with you and at times it makes you blush because after the initial stages of feeling your relationship out, you find that ellie’s extremely vocal and outright with her affection for you.
and for the longest time, you don’t question it. don’t really say much because ellie’s particularly good at reassuring you even if you don’t ask.
it’s why you think you’re overreacting when you decide to surprise her and bring her lunch on a random afternoon in the middle of the week.
the top half of her coveralls hangs around her hips, dirtied white tank exposing tanned, inked flesh and lean muscle when you enter the lobby.
she’s leaning against one of the tool carts with her arms crossed over her chest, gaze unwavering.
when you trace her eyeline, you realize there’s another girl nearby bent under the hood of a shiny red car.
she says something imperceptible and suddenly ellie’s throwing her head back with a laugh, sound muffled by the sliding plexiglass.
“hey, receptionist is on break, can i help you with something?” a mechanic is poking his head into the lobby from an adjoining office.
“uh, i’m here for ellie?” the mechanic’s glancing through the glass into the main garage before standing from his rolling chair to dust his hands on his coveralls.
“yeah, she’s supposed to be watching the front,” he laughs. “too busy flirting with her lil girlfriend to pay attention.”
he doesn’t notice the way your face falls or how you almost drop the little canvas bag altogether.
you chance another glance at the two, find that the girl has emerged from under the hood and you swallow hard because god, she’s so fucking pretty.
doesn’t help that seeing her and ellie side-by-side makes you wonder if the two of you look that good together.
they look like they were made for each other and they even share similar interests! you don’t know a damned thing about cars and ellie’s gaze nearly glazes over every time you’re talking about your recipes and coffee pairings.
“uh, actually,” you stop him. “i don’t think she was expecting me, so i’ll just drop this off.”
he pauses.
“you sure? i can get her real quick, she’s not busy.”
ellie still hasn’t clocked you, so you shake your head.
“it’s fine,” you assure him. “i’ll talk to her later.”
he merely shrugs, meets you halfway for the canvas bag, and you’re quickly ducking out of the garage.
“babe?”
ellie’s right on the dot, you realize, when you hear her through the cracked sliding door to the balcony.
you’ve just finished watering your plants and now you’re jotting down a quick brainstorm for the upcoming spring launch.
through the window, you see ellie kicking her shoes off at the entrance before assessing her surroundings and poking her head into your bedroom for good measure.
“babe?” she calls out.
you stand, tucking the little notebook under your arm before sliding back inside.
she seems to light up when she sees you, crossing the living room to meet you halfway.
“hey, els.”
you’re letting her engulf you in a hug, arms wrapping around your waist as she buries her face in the crook of your neck.
“missed you today,” she hums, rocking your weight from side to side.
“missed you too,” you say gently.
ellie’s pulling away a short distance, finger bumping under your chin so you’ll look up at her.
“why didn’t you say hi when you stopped in today?” she nearly pouts. “zack came in when we were slow and said that someone dropped something off for me.”
you shrug, unable to tell her that insecurity was rearing its ugly head and you didn’t know how to deal with it in that moment.
“my girl didn’t wanna eat with me?”
“sorry,” you mumble, burning up under the heat of her gaze. “i couldn’t stay long.”
her brows are furrowing, hands coming up to smooth your hair from your face and brush over your shoulders.
“everything okay, babe?”
you nod once, then twice.
“yeah, why wouldn’t i be?”
ellie’s watching you closely, fingers cupping your neck.
“talk to me,” she encourages softly. “did something happen?”
you swallow, shake your head, and put on your most convincing smile before leaning up to give her a peck on the lips.
“m’okay,” you tell her.
she doesn’t look convinced, but she also doesn’t wanna pry.
changes the subject instead.
“so does this mean, you’ll swing by and actually hang out with me soon?” she asks, body relaxing when you start smoothing over the wrinkles in her coveralls as a distraction.
you nod, smile widening when she starts peppering kisses all over your face.
for a little bit, you forget about ellie’s coworker and you forget about the comment that zack made, but then you’re popping in again almost two weeks later.
they’re shoulder to shoulder in the body shop, looking at something under the hood of a silver pick up truck. ellie’s engrossed, but the girl’s fullblown staring, paying no mind to whatever ellie’s explaining in the engine bed.
makes you sick to your stomach thinking that if ellie so much as chances a glance, their noses could brush.
“hey receptionist is— oh.”
it’s zack, the same mechanic from last time.
he’s wiping his hands on an old towel as he emerges from one of the bays.
“ellie!” he shouts past the propped open door.
she nearly jumps out of her skin, parting from her coworker as she throws a cross look over her shoulder.
“your girl’s here,” he announces.
ellie’s straightening up, craning her neck even more before her face splits into a bright smile.
she’s abandoning the girl by the truck, jogging across the body shop to duck into the lobby.
“hi, angel.”
your cheeks warm when she slides her arm around your waist to pull you into her.
“gonna go on lunch break, don’t wait up,” she calls & you’re sparing the girl near the truck a glance.
her name’s emma if the stitching on the right breast of her coveralls is anything to go by.
she makes a show of taking you in from head to toe before her gaze cuts to zack and they seemingly share a wordless exchange.
oh.
you have no clue what to make of that, but ellie’s steering you from the lobby and out into the crisp air.
it’s still a little chilly outside, but you’re wearing one of ellie’s favorite sweatshirts and she’s shrugging on a hoodie hanging from a coatrack by the door.
“my truck?” she offers when a chill rips down your spine.
you only hum.
when the two of you are settled, her in the driver’s seat and you in the passenger’s, she’s taking the little bag with lunch containers and setting it on her dash before pulling you towards her to eliminate every inch of space between the two of you.
“whaddya doing?” you sigh out a laugh.
“i missed you,” ellie says simply.
“ellie, you slept over last night,” you squeak out a breathy laugh when her ice cold hands slide under the warmth of the red fleece. “we saw each other this morning.”
“so?” she replies petulantly. “wanna be with you all the time.”
you’re wearing a turtleneck underneath the sweatshirt so she’s nosing along your jaw before pressing a few soft kisses there.
“you’re so clingy recently, els,” you giggle, arms winding around her neck.
“duh.” and your belly flips when she doesn’t even deny it. “you’re so fucking cute and i just wanna keep you in my pocket all the time.”
that earns her a full-hearted laugh and you really begin to wonder why you let that girl with her stupidly perfect blown out hair and stupidly rounded ass and the most stupidly pretty face ever make you question your ellie.
you live in bliss for the duration of her forty-five minute break where she does a whole lot of eating, but not necessarily the food you made for her.
the windows are equal parts fogged and frosted by the time she’s done with you and you’re shimmying your jeans back up in the back seat of her truck as she shrugging the top half of her discard coveralls and her hoodie back on again.
“you didn’t even touch to food i made you,” you whine.
“i’ll eat it on my ten,” she assures you, and your toes curl when she wipes her lips with the back of her hand.
“liked what i had for lunch better,” she says so casually, your cheeks are on fire.
“ellie!”
“definitely need dessert when i get home,” she insinuates, leaning her weight over your blissed out body.
she plants a kiss on your mouth before climbing back into the front seat.
but, in the lobby, when she’s bidding you a farewell with another peck on the lips, promising she’ll try to come home early, you notice emma’s eyes again. they’re searing, laced with obvious annoyance.
ellie’s returning to her duties and you’re ducking into their restroom for a moment to splash your face with cool water.
ellie’s never given you a reason to doubt her, has been a perfect girlfriend since the beginning, but you can’t help yourself.
especially not when you’re ducking out and you hear it.
“so i’m not the only one surprised that her girl looks like that?” you think it’s zack, but you can’t be so sure.
“i dunno, she’s hot, but they don’t really match,” another voice sounds. “especially since her last…thing was with emma.”
and, wow, fuck, you hadn’t been expecting that.
“damn, i forgot about that,” maybe zack says. “it was at the party mel and them threw, right? when they fucked?”
you’d wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. maybe they’d been a thing once upon a time, kissed on occasion, but hearing it put so crassly makes you feel like you’re gonna throw up.
the bell’s tinkling hard against the glass when you throw the door open.
and perhaps the situation with finding out about ellie and emma goes hand-in-hand with the way ellie experiences her jealousy.
maybe the fact that ellie still works closely with a previous situationship and is obviously on friendly terms with makes you withdraw a little.
you’re spending a lot more time at your cafe, readying for spring launch and brainstorming new recipes.
you don’t want to bore ellie, especially when you’ve been so in your head about everything lately, so you’re putting in more hours, coming home late at night.
truthfully, ellie’s devastated because she misses her girl :/ why are you always so busy suddenly?
so when a familiar face comes poking into the cafe a few weeks down the line, your eyes are as wide as saucers.
“wow, alex, is that you?”
she’s an ex who’d moved abroad for work a few years back. and the break up had been amicable enough, but she’d moved on and so had you.
the only contact the two of you keep is the occasional comment on social media and a text or two during the holidays.
she’s grinning ear-to-ear.
“what are you doing here?” you ask incredulously, setting the rag down on the bartop to round the counter.
you’d been in the middle of prepping to close up shop when the bells chimed against the glass.
“visiting my parents for a few weeks,” she answers. “thought i’d stop by and see how you’re doing.”
“great, i’m doing great,” you assure her with a warm smile. “what about you? how’s germany?”
“definitely miss the food here sometimes, but you know,” she shrugs and you’re letting out a laugh. “and...julia’s pregnant.”
and your brows are shooting up, arms wrapping around her middle.
“alex, that’s so exciting!” you cheer. “congratulations.”
her cheeks are red when you pull away.
“yeah,” she says softly, eyes gentle. “i’m so excited.”
and you’re glad to hear that things are working out for her, that she’s established herself well and she’s building the family she’s always dreamed of.
“and you?” she asks.
“what about me?”
“are you seeing anyone?”
it’s your turn to warm, fidgeting under her expectant gaze.
“i am,” you confirm.
her smile widens
“that’s great,” she says genuinely. “i’m glad. i hope they make you happy.”
and it really makes you draw into yourself for a moment because ellie does. she makes you so fucking happy, you don’t know what to do with yourself sometimes.
“yeah,” you hum. “she’s great.”
the two of you end up catching up a little as you close, and she even takes you up on your offer of visiting again for a tasting before she leaves!
and this is most likely what sends ellie over the edge.
at first she didn’t know why you were suddenly so distant, knew you were dedicated, but didn’t know why you were so invested as of late.
recently, it’s been her popping into your apartment, but being disappointed to find that you’re not even home.
and the days that she does catch you, you’re pecking her on the lips and rushing out the door.
makes ellie question if there’s something she should be paying closer attention to.
honestly, she’s just really worried that she did something wrong, so as she’s trekking up the sidewalk to approach your little cafe with a bundle of cute flowers around 10 in the evening, she’s feeling a weird sense of deja vu.
finds that the open sign has been flipped and that the lights are dim, but nearly trips over her steps when she peers inside and sees you behind the counter.
you’re not alone, a tall figure leaned up against the bartop, obviously deeply interested in whatever you’re animatedly talking about.
you’re still wearing your apron, hair falling from its hold and a lump is lodging its way into ellie’s throat.
tugs gently on the handle to see that it’s locked and the motion catches both you and your company’s attention.
god, whoever you’re with is an absolute stunner and ellie’s swallowing hard as you round the counter and flit through the tables to come let her in.
“els, what are you doing here?” you ask, smiling softly.
barely registers what you’re saying because the girl you’re with has straightened and there’s something so put together and elegant about the brunette that makes a pang of insecurity begin to coil in ellie’s stomach.
“wanted to see you,” she says simply.
“oh,” you reply. “we were just finishing up here, i would’ve been home in like an hour.”
and that leaves such a sour taste in her mouth because a lot can happen in an hour, in forty-five minutes even.
“great, i’ll walk you home,” ellie says, tone pinched.
your brows furrow and you’re opening your mouth to ask ellie if everything’s fine, but alex is placing a casual hand on your shoulder to remind you she’s there and ellie can’t help but zero in on the way her slender fingers curl.
“alex,” she introduces, offering her other hand.
“ellie,” your girlfriend bites back, glancing at alex’s outstretched palm before glancing back up at her.
there’s a twinkle of knowing in alex’s eye as she nods thoughtfully.
“heard a lot about you,” she says simply.
ellie merely hums.
and god, you’re mortified because you’d spent the entire night raving about ellie even though alex was supposed to be giving you feedback on launch ideas.
you’d told her how kind and great ellie was. instead, here she is, ice cold and glaring.
“well...” alex turns her attention to you. “i really appreciate tonight, everything was phenomenal.”
you preen under the praise and ellie’s rolling her eyes, fist tightening around the stems of the flowers.
“of course, anytime,” you assure her. “thank you for visiting me again.”
and seeing the two of you side-by-side, ellie feels so small. because you’ve always been so pretty, so out of her league and the two of you look like a match made in heaven.
“always,” alex replies, and ever the instigator, she adds, “text me when you get home?”
“i will,” you tell her, brushing past ellie to lock her out. “goodnight, alex, be safe!”
she says something in return that evades ellie’s hearing, but she’s far too livid to even tune in.
you’ve barely locked the door behind her when ellie’s voice cuts through the tense air.
“who the fuck was that?” she asks sharply.
you turn on your heel, brows dipping because ellie’s rarely let her anger get the best of her.
“ellie, what are—”
“i asked you a question,” she says firmly.
you roll your lips, gaze downcast because such a good moment has been obliterated by ellie’s fiery temper.
“we dated a few years ago,” you answer honestly. “she was back in town for the next few weeks and i wanted to do something nice.”
ellie lets out a humorless laugh.
“so i’ve been worried sick for weeks because you wanna ghost me when you’ve really been parading around with your ex?” ellie huffs.
and okay, wow, you hadn’t really expected that from her because your ellie is usually relatively level-headed.
“this is only the second time i’ve seen her, ellie,” you argue. “we were friends way before we even dated and it was a clean break up. we were just catching up.”
ellie’s tossing the bouquet of flowers, now crushed by her unrelenting fist, onto the nearest table top.
“just catching up, huh?” she mocks. “so a romantic set up, just the two of you, is just catching up? you said not to wait up for you because you’d be caught up with work. good to know that screwing your ex is—”
“this is work,” you bite back. “i’ve been trying to get my bearings for this upcoming launch and she was kind enough to put up with all my crazy ideas and all my rambling,” then quietly, “given ninety percent of it was about you.”
“what, you couldn’t ask me?” ellie huffs. “you know i’d help you if you wanted me to!”
“i didn’t ask because i know all this shit bores you,” you say weakly. “alex was just being nice.”
that shuts ellie up, douses her anger like a bucket of ice cold water on a fire. and now she feels like a piece of shit because she hadn’t known that you felt that way.
“and she’s engaged,” you add, pulling away from her when she takes a step towards you. instead you busy yourself with gathering your spread and all the silverware. “they’re expecting a child.”
and fuck, ellie wishes she’d slowed down. wishes that she hadn’t talked out of her ass.
“i didn't—”
“you’re one to talk, ellie,” you add coldly. “you work in close proximity with a girl you used to fuck regularly. you’re still friends with her, and it’s obvious to every single soul imaginable that i’m just an obstacle to her and that she’s still interested. but i didn’t say anything even if it fucking ate away at me because i know you. you’ve never given me a reason to doubt us.”
that knocks that wind from ellie’s lungs because she hadn’t realized that you knew. just wanted to sweep it under the rug because her and emma were never serious and she didn’t want you worrying.
“wait, angel, i’m sorry,” ellie says. “i—”
you shake your head.
“whatever, ellie,” you whisper. “i have to close up.”
“c’mon, babe, don’t—”
“i don’t wanna talk about this anymore,” you cut her off. “i’ll be home soon, but i wanna be alone right now.”
when you get home and see ellie’s sneakers by the door, you take in a deep breath and try to mentally prepare yourself for the inevitable conversation, but instead, you’re met with the smell of your favorite take out and a soft murmur from your vinyl player in the living room.
when you make it to the end of the corridor to peer into the kitchen, you see ellie taking down a few plates.
she’s glancing over her shoulder, body seemingly relaxing when she finds you standing in the archway of the kitchen.
“hey,” she greets softly, and you belatedly realize that her voice is hoarse.
“hi,” you reply.
“wanna eat first?” she asks you, but you don’t answer, too busy analyzing her.
you put two and two together; figure that she’s been crying if the red bags under her eyes and the dying flush on her cheeks is anything to go by.
she takes a step towards you and you seem to snap out of it.
“wanna shower first,” you tell her.
you hear her gulp.
“okay,” she says.
and you hate this. you hate being upset and you hate that she’s upset and knowing that ellie cried makes you wanna cry, so you’re taking a step towards her.
she’s glancing at you.
“shower with me?” you offer timidly.
ellie’s pushing off the counter, nodding eagerly.
and truthfully, ellie had every intention of keeping her hands to herself, but then you were asking her to help work the soap down your back.
then you were turning to face her to rinse under the stream of the showerhead. the sudsy water’s making its way down the column of your throat and the curves of your body and ellie’s tongue is so dry, she feels like it could crack in her mouth.
her hands settle on the narrow of your waist, right over the swell of your hips as she presses open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder.
“i’m so sorry, angel,” she whispers, hands sliding to rest against the small of your back.
you give in even though you’re still in your head, arms looping around her neck as she brushes your hair to one side and starts paying a lot more attention to the spot right behind your ear.
“s’okay, els,” you assure her softly. “i’m sorry, too. i was being a brat.”
your fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of her neck, breath hitching when she grabs a palmful of your ass and breaks away from your neck to catch your lips between her own.
“you don’t know how much i love you,” she murmurs between kisses, sighing brokenly when the plush of your tits presses against her sensitive nipples.
you moan when one of her hands slides down your front and gently brushes over your clit.
“ellie,” you whimper.
“let me show you?”
your head is lolling back when the pads of her calloused fingers circle your entrance to gather the slick that’s accumulating there.
you nod.
“yeah, yeah, ellie, please,” you choke.
she’s reaching behind you to turn the shower off, ducking outside of the tiled space to grab your towel.
and she’s slow, meticulous as she dries you off, mouth watering when the cool air of the bathroom makes gooseflesh ripple over your smooth skin.
“you’re so fucking perfect,” ellie whispers, standing behind you in the mirror. “so fucking perfect and all mine.”
your eyelids are drooping shut as she discards the towel, hands wandering as her teeth sink into your neck.
“oh, fuuu—”
ellie’s jostling you back into your bedroom. when she’s about to push you back against the mattress, you’re spinning so that she’s falling against the unmade duvet, taking you with her.
and ellie’s gaze is glazing over when you spread her legs to reveal a pussy slick with need and a clit so swollen, it makes you salivate.
“what are you doing?” she whispers, fingertips denting the fat of your thighs.
“wanna ride you, els,” you whimper, climbing to straddle her heat. “wanna take care of you.”
one of her legs stretches to settle over your shoulder and you’re kissing her calf as your clits bump.
“fuck,” ellie chokes when you start rolling your hips. “fuck, wait, angel, just—”
the slip is delicious, obscene sound of your combined arousal echoing through the room to mingle with ellie’s throaty moans.
ellie’s used to watching you ride her strap, used to fucking you and giving you everything because it’s one of the things that makes her the happiest, but, fuck, she could get used to this.
“you gonna cream all over my pussy, ellie?” you whine, pace relentless as you ride her.
she lets out a breathy laugh.
“you feel how wet i am?” ellie gasps, thumb coming to nestle between your heat. the friction feels so fucking good against your clit, has you throwing your head back as you fuck her. “god, you’re fucking delusional if you think i’m not a hundred and ten percent obsessed with you.”
“oh fuck, ellie, your pussy feels s’good,” you whine, eyes watering when her other hand settles on your hip to guide you.
“does it, angel?” she moans breathily. “only you can get me like this.”
“you’re so wet, els,” you marvel. “your cunt’s so soft and so...so—”
“it’s all yours,” she whispers shakily, hips jerking because she’s close. “all yours, angel.”
and she’s crying out when you slip off of her, hands grabbing for you desperately.
she’s throwing her head back against your pillows when your lips latch onto her clit.
“oh, shit,” she moans. “wait, wait.”
but you don’t wait, in fact, your ministrations quicken, tongue lapping at the slick that gushes from ellie’s cunt.
“fuck, angel, i’m gonna—”
the broken moan that leaves ellie’s lithe body has you clenching your thighs. and you think she’s gonna cum, but her palm is firm against your forehead to push you away gently.
her eyes nearly roll to the back of her head when a string of spit webs from your chin to her clit.
“m’not cumming before you do,” she swallows. “this was supposed to be about you.”
“it is,” you assure her. “all i care about right now is making you cum.”
“jesus, you’re actually something else,” ellie sighs shakily, combing a tattooed hand through her damp locks.
you’re making a move to close in on her pussy again, but she’s pushing you onto your back, settling her achey cunt over your thigh as she circles both of your wrists in one hand.
“let me take care of you and you can do whatever you want with me for the rest of the night,” ellie promises, sloppy kiss turning into her licking into your mouth.
her fingers waste no time finding your folds, pads eager against your bud before dipping lower to tease at your entrance.
“how could you think i’d want any other pussy other than yours, angel?” she whispers against your mouth as she stuffs you knuckles deep. “this is all mine, you hear me? all fuckin’ mine.”
you nod, squirming against where she’s still got you confined with a bruising grip around your wrists.
“s’all yours, els,” you whimper.
“just like this pussy’s all yours,” she husks, hips rolling over the swell of your thigh. “would never fucking dream of giving myself to anyone but you.”
and god, ellie knows all the right things to say to have you winding tight.
you’re arching into her, jaw slack and eyes crossing as she hits that spot inside you that has you feeling fucking boneless.
“c’mon, angel,” she encourages you. “just once all over my fingers, then you can do whatever you want to me.”
the squelch has ellie’s thighs shaking as she rolls her hips, knuckles curling hard inside the warm heat of your needy pussy.
“don’t stop, els,” you beg her. “i’m gonna—”
she’s freeing your wrists, climbing from your thigh to settle on her knees at the end of the bed.
“wait, els, i’m gonna—”
and the moan that leaves you can be heard by the entire apartment block, no doubt, because ellie’s sucking your clit past her lips and eating you out like it’s the last thing she’ll ever do.
the shit she’s murmuring against your folds is filthy, has you trying to squeeze your knees together because ellie’s that good.
“ohfuckohfuckohfuck,” you cry out when she adds a third finger.
it’s all it takes because a few moments later, your back’s arching all the way off the bed, thighs vibrating as she continues to toy with you through your orgasm.
“that’s it, angel,” ellie whispers. “ride it out.”
your chest heaves through the final waves, a sheen of sweat making your dewy skin look like it’s glistening under the lowlight of your bedside lamp.
“you did so fuckin’ good for me,” ellie says gently, standing naked between your parted legs as your arm drapes over your eyes in embarrassment.
“stop hiding,” she scolds, climbing to straddle you.
her hands are wandering, smoothing over every available expanse of skin as you cover your face and shy away from her.
she’s shocked when she pries your arm away and finds tears welling in your eyes.
“babe,” she calls incredulously. “why are you—”
“we wouldn’t have been in this situation if i wasn’t so immature and just talked to you about it,” you hiccup.
ellie’s face is falling, pulling you up to wrap you in her arms.
“babe, stop,” she whines softly, rocking you as a shudder rips down your spine. “i should’ve said something and i definitely shouldn’t have acted the way i did earlier. if anything i was immature.”
“you’re such a good girlfriend, ellie,” you whimper. “and i’m...i’m sorry, i—”
“hey, hey,” she stops you firmly, peeling away from you to thumb at your chin. “don’t do that.”
and you feel like such a big fucking baby as ellie repositions the two of you so that she’s leaning against your headboard and she’s pulling you against her sweaty chest.
“i’m sorry, ellie,” you choke again.
“stop apologizing,” ellie croaks, and you realize that the emotions are welling inside of her as well. “none of this was your fault, angel. i should’ve been honest and just told you, but i was scared.”
you’re still hiccuping, ear pressed over her heart.
“you’re my first real girlfriend in a really long time, and it doesn’t help that you’re so grossly out of my league, and—”
“ellie,” you chide.
“i don’t wanna mess things up with you,” she admits softly. “especially after the way we started.”
“i’d never hold that against you,” you swallow.
“and that’s what makes it worse. i know you wouldn’t even if you should,” ellie whispers. “and then today, i saw you with someone else and it made me so fucking mad because the two of you look so good together. it made me feel like i don’t deserve you.”
“els.” and you’re crying harder now, arms winding so tight around her waist, she feels like she’ll burst.
“i’m sorry,” ellie says gently. “you’ve always been so fucking good to me and—”
you’re leaning up, kissing her to shut her up before she starts crying and she’s cradling your face like you’re the most fragile thing.
“i love you so fucking much, ellie,” you tell her between kisses. “let’s just...let’s just put this behind us, okay?”
she nods, pulls from your lips to nestle her face in your neck.
“i love you more, angel,” she murmurs against your skin. “you don’t even know.”
neng © 2023
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Yes, some writers put "request open" either where in the Title (where they usually put their name) or in the description or where they have their masterlist<3
Thank you for your help lmao I'm not the brightest. It's really nice of you !