After Seeing More And More Blogs Follow My Mutuals And I Without An Age In Their Pinned Post Or Bio,

ʙɴʜᴀ ʙᴏʏꜱ ᴀᴄᴄɪᴅᴇɴᴛᴀʟʟʏ ᴄᴏɴꜰᴇꜱꜱ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ

| part 1 | part 2 | part 3 |

pairings: bakugo x gn!reader, todoroki x gn!reader

genre: humor/fluff/smau

scenario: the reader receives an odd text from their crush, maybe it wasn’t meant for them?

an: ok so this is my first smau and it’s heavily inspired by this and this so please go check those out and follow @izukuisbaby and @katsuphobic cuz this is kind of a reverse version of theirs. also i wrote reader as kinda dumb/oblivious in this.

ᴋᴀᴛꜱᴜᴋɪ ʙᴀᴋᴜɢᴏᴜ

ꜱʜᴏᴛᴏ ᴛᴏᴅᴏʀᴏᴋɪ

please do not repost or modify my work! re-blogs and comments are GREATLY appreciated!!

I redirect you to this <3

Patience is the key to success (2)

Masterlist if you want to read my others things

CW/TW: yandere-manipulative-obsessive-stalker-ethan, fem reader, smut, no p in v, depressed reader(but really), suicidal thoughts

i'm trying to post this quick because I crave attention, whatever its insults, compliments, likes or repost, idc. I want ppl to know i'm existing. i have a big oral test tomorrow and im really bad at speaking before someone (hence why im writing instead) so i just need to know im not totally useless in the society and that im, at the very least, making people enjoy my things. sorry for the rant, i have a big headhache, probably gonna die ✌️😚

the smut is really bad btw but like really but im bad at writing them but i need to to improve (26/06/2023) (5226 words)

"Let's just finish watching the movie now." you say and Ethan doesn't make you repeat as he goes straight to the couch.

You felt much better after that little talk. Ethan did not say much but in his words, there was a lot more. He was planning to be with you a long time. He does not want to ruin things. It made you so happy. Every fiber in you was warm thinking of it. You were at peace.

Ethan was calm after that, albeit moving uncomfortably sometimes. (maybe because of his boner?) He was just as cuddly as when you arrived. His head laid flat on your chest, rising up and down with each one of your breath. Your fingers brush his curl slowly as you hear his breathing slacken. You were giddy thinking about him being at peace with you, too.

His arms were closed tightly around your body, never letting you go. The movie was really advanced by now, the end was coming soon. It probably was something towards 11AM. Usually, you would have gone knock at your friend's house but there was no need now as you already saw her earlier.

When the movie fatefully ended, the credits start to roll but none of you moved an inch. Ethan rubs his cheeks against your chest before sighing happily. His eyes were closed. Was he asleep ? No, certainly not. He loves horror movie. He wouldn't fall asleep when one is ongoing.

He was cute here. You were delighted to think he trusted you enough to let his guards down and sleep with you. You were his safeplace. And he was yours. Your fingers trail down on his back where you draw small patterns dreamily. You write things, that cross your mind. You simply scratch him. His sudden speaking startle you. Your hand stopping evey movements.

"Are you sleeping far from here, today ? Every movements of his jaw hitting slightly on your chest. 'today' because he knew about your frequent change of home.

Relaxing, you continue to caress his back lovingly.

-No, not really. But I don't sleep there anymore.

The hotel too was starting to worry you. Like the building was shrieking on you. You don't know what was scarier, to be alone or to never be. And now that you found such a warm place, you don't want to leave. Ever.

-Why ?

-Scare me, s'all.

-You can sleep here tonight, if you want.

-Why ? Your decision was already made; you'd sleep here. You knew it the second he offered you to stay the night. But you wanted to see his arguments to convince you.

"Let me be with you." his sentence made a shiver run down your back.

Did that stalker fucked you up so hard you had chill even thinking about them? It was just a damn sentence. Everyone can say it. For god's sake, it's Ethan saying it of all people. Even if he awoke this uneasy feeling back, you couldn't blame him. He didn't know about the sign the criminal had shown you. You didn't tell him that much detail, only saying they had indeed brought creepy signs but omitting what was written on it. And Ethan said it so prettily, too. Yes, of course you'd be with him.

He told you you never slept here before and that you'd be safe anyway since he's here and don't plan on leaving you. So you accepted. It was really early in the day but the both of you were getting sleepy because of the calm and comfort of the situation. He offered you to go to his room which you accepted. After guiding you to there, he tells you he has to go grab something and that he'd be back really quick.

And he did, in fact, came back really quick.

By then, you were already sprawled out on his bed. You had time to see the mess he had scattered everywhere. The carboard, the books, the drawings, some letters, too. And you even found out about his second phone. The lockscreen was a generic one, the one you have by default, as if he just got it recently. But the phone wasn't new, it seems in contrary really old as it was broken at some area.

Ethan arrives in the room with a small plastic blue square packaging, you don't have time to see what it was that he throws it under the bed. You don't pay it too much attention. Playing mindlessly with his other phone in hand, you take off and put back the phone case of it to entertain yourself.

"You got two phones ? you ask even though you kind of knew the answer already.

-Oh, yes. One is for games only, the other is the one I'm really using. Did you went on it ?

-No, don't worry, I won't frisk into your secret criminal life."

He smiles before taking the phone out of your hand. He places it in the drawer of his nightstand. Ethan falls on top of you, taking your breath away for a moment. You laugh and hit his back for him to get away from you and he just laugh heartly before letting himself fall beside you.

He lays down, setting his head on his arm, looking up at you with stars in eyes. Sometimes, he's so pretty it hurt physically to look at him. Starting to get embarrassed by his insistent look, you find something to say.

-Why do you have so much pieces of cardboard anyway ?

-I make placards out of them.

With a fond smile, Ethan stares straight at your eyes. As if waiting for you to say something. You would have ask questions about his 'placards ' if not for the sudden interest he was displaying in you, which, instead, made you change subject without really noticing it. A nervous laugh escaping you.

-Why are you looking at me like that ? Is there an undertone ? Am I supposed to understand something ?"

He shakes his head negatively, displaying a small mischievous smile. He could be such a goblin at times ! Wanting to make him swallow his pride, you lean towards him and kiss his lips. Ethan smiles and moves his lips with yours.

Your arm set down on his waist and soon the kiss get heated. Ethan's body is burning, his breath is too. You don't let each other breath, as soon as you separate from each other, you plunge back in. Physically needing the contact.

You rise on your knee, arching your back to kiss him still laying flat on the bed. Soon, he joins you by rising as well. Both of you on your knees, face to face, eating each other's face. Ethan's hand are mahandling you to sit on his thights. Then, with his surprising strenght, he starts sliding you on them. Your heating pussy rubbing directly on the fabric of his pant. Your hand instinctivly goes to rub the growing tent in his trousers. The area was hot, when you slide your fingers on it, it would budge.

Ethan whimpers, thrusting his hips against yours. You straddle him completly, framing his his body with your legs. You rub his tent against your clit for some frictions. It was aching and growing more desperate by seconds.

"I... I wanna have sex with you." Ethan says softly.

You kiss his cheek, going for his neck. You answer with a meek 'me too' before sucking the skin of his neck. Ethan backs his head, already out of breath. He gives you full access to his body, still rutting desperatly his hips into yours.

But you were growing impatient. You lift your body from him, making him whine at the contact loss, before sliding your fingers behind the elastic of his pants. You slip it down to his knees before you start salivating at the sight of his hard cock already drooling for you.

He didn't have any underwear. That's why you could feel him so close to your core.

Your hand touch his thight, caressing gently his body. Making sure to avoid the area he need you the most. Ethan try to touch himself, tired of your teasing, but you slap his hand away. He whines and looks up at you with teary eyes. Silently begging you to do something. It was impossible for you to resist him.

Your hand grabs his cock in one motion, you could feel it pulse and its warmth propagate in your hand. It was already so so wet because of all his precum, your hand was sliding so easily you could have thought he came multiple times already. Gently, you start to move your hand on all its lenght slowly. The boy props himself on his elbows and look at the scene before him. Ethan sighs happily, eyes closing and head backing. He's in heaven, he thinks. But not entirely, as he looks at you still clothed.

"Want to... Want to finger you..." he pleas.

In front of a boy so desperate, and being incredibly horny, you slide your pant down, making sure your underwear went with it. Ethan lose every one of his braincells when he sees your bare pussy glistening with your love juice. He wanted to lick it bad. That's the only one fanstam he ever had that help him getting off so hard he can't move for a whole minute. He wants to drown himself in your juice. But you have others projects.

You guide his pointer finger to your lips. Ethan starts caressing it and smear your juice everywhere. His lift up another finger and start passing both of them on your lips.

"Here, you have to touch here." you say, pointing to your clit.

You move briefly to bring your genitals closer. You could feel each other's warmth emanating from your core. Seeing him try to touch you was so hot. He was listening to everything you said.

Soon getting the hang of it, he starts circling your clit, applying different pressure on it to see which one were you reacting the most to. Slowly, you quicken your pace on his hard cock. As if to reward him for being such a good boy. He was in a trance, eyes closing and opening. And when they opened, they were staring with a utmost care at your moving breast throught your shirt. Your nipples were hard and were poking through the fabric.

His eyes were glued to it. Understanding his want, you lift your shirt above your collarbone with your free hand. Ethan can't seem to take off his eyes of you. They're probably the first pair of breasts he sees in real life after all.

"Fuck... You're so pretty, love." you speed up on his shaft at his praise. "Fuck, fuck...

-You can touch baby.

-I can?"

He stops all movements to your pussy, your frown but let him discover his needs. It was his first time, you needed to let him have a little fun. His free hand touch one of your breast, massaging it then weighten it in the palm of his hand. He smiles like an idiot, an idiot so cute you let him do what he wants with you. His other, wet, hand pinch lightly your sensitive bud.

Your free hand slap his arm to make him understand he did it too hard. He sends you an apologatic smile.

"They're like stress ball."

Amused by the weird comparison, your chuckle. Still impatient to come, you guide your hand higher on his cock to caress his tip and rub it. His face contorts in pleasure, browns frows and mouth ajar. His forehead fall on your shoulder while his fingers go back down near your entrance. His hips were thrusting into nothing but your hand. Obscene wet noises were resulted. You were hot, terrribly hot but so was he.

Ethan's small puff of breath sends chill in your body. His whimpers couldn't be replaced with anyone else. Your hand was all wet and sticky, as was his. Ethan decides to enter once again two of his digits in you. Your head falls back and you sigh happily at finally scratching that itch in you.

"Curl your fingers, E." you whisper.

He hums and do as told. Curling his fingers in you, he starts to thrust them in and out at a slow pace, adopting the same sensuality you used to jerk him off. You accelerate, your hand no longer lingering on the entire shaft. Sometimes, you'd stop completly to hear him whine. Your thumb caressing his cock's veins.

"Baby please..." he pleas.

Ethan starts kissing sloppily your shoulder, your neck. You, on the other hand, take his hand to guide the thrust of his fingers, angling them correctly for them to touch that spongy spot inside. His fingers were long and thin, that was a part of him you absolutly loved. You always had a thing for pretty hands and his were beautiful.

"What do you want, love? you ask tenderly.

-Tell me you love me..."

You nudge his hair with your nose and he looks up. Staring at his eyes, you see them wet with tears. You kiss him instantly. Playing with his tongue with yours, your hand moving faster and faster. You stop the kiss to tell him you love him and he bites his lips, eyes closing.

His breath is jerky, uneven. You press his palm against your clit, rubbing it while you push his fingers inside you again. You feel a knot tighten. You won't last long.

"Tell me you love me.

-I love you E, you're doing so good.

-Again..."

You said it as many times as he needed to feel better. His hips stuttters, his cock quivers. His words are slurred to each other, resulting in incomprehensible blabbering. You don't lose the rythm, keeping the same pace until he'd eventually come.

-Love you so..." he whines.

His body tense, his breath stops. You can only hear the wet sounds your hand is producing. He doesn't utter a sound until spurts of cum smear on your hand and belly. Feeling at ease, he moans a last time from relief and breath again.

You're not far behind. Ethan being pratically knocked out, you grind on his hand. You close your thighs around it, ensuring it stay inside. Your legs are shaking, wave of hot and cold invade you. You plunge his fingers inside but, to your surprise, Ethan regains control and start pounding into you to get you to your end.

He kisses your neck while you finally come on his fingers, sweaty and disvesheled. You swear one last time when he withdraws his fingers. You stay here for a while, just hugging , breathing and basking in each other's presence.

After some minutes, you decide to go shower together. You end up finally getting a good night of sleep, cuddled in his strong arms.

The next day, Ethan and you had a stupid satisfied smile on your face. Both happy to be here. You kissed and confessed your love to each other all morning until eventually he had to leave for work. Sadly, you had things to do, too. Ethan offered you to stay and sleep here for a few nights because he wanted to stay close to you.

You liked this idea. Of course you liked it, you love Ethan. And to convince you further, he told you his roomate wouldn't mind. So naturally you accepted. You were embarassed at the idea of bothering his roomate but you decided you would just sleep here, and the day, you'd let the apartment free. It was his too, after all. Not only Ethan's. There is no way you'd let someone feel excluded in their own house.

Grabbing your phone, you click on your friend's number. You call her, the ringing echoes three times and no one answer. Somehow begrudgingly, you resume yourself at simply sending a text. Just for you to instantly forgetting your sorrow as she answers. The discussion was quite simple, she was telling you she was at her grandma right now. She was bored and wanted to know how you were doing.

'I'm going back to my dear haunted apartment, probably gonna die. Wish me luck.' you texted. She put a little more time answering this one. It's possible it triggered something in her. After everything she endured. 'nobody will hurt you as long as i'm alive' she said. She simply changed subjects after that. Asking you about the cute guy you told her about in the letters. And so you explained everything. Every time you tried to offer to call her, she'd decline. You were still sad she didn't want to talk to you but you were telling yourself you needed to be patient.

On a happier note, you decided to leave the place to go to your own apartment.

To one point, you should have known better than be too happy about your improving situation. Of course, it was well too soon for you to consider everything better. But you were probably stupid because the fall hit you much harder than you could've prepared yourself for. Oh, the pain you felt when reality had finally caught you. You thought you were going to die when you came back home to simply grab some clothes. (Ethan told you to do so.)

Your door was ajar. But it wasn't your doing. No, of course it wasn't you. Your apartement terrified you, why would you come here more ofthen than needed ? You felt your body freeze but you quickly overcame the feeling. That's it. You needed it to end. This fucking stalker had ruined you. You and your life. You sent a text to Ethan, telling him that if you do not call him after twenty minutes, he needed to call the cops. He didn't answer. He was at work. It was well past eleven by now.

Your heart was beating so hard you thought it was going to collapse on the ground, and you with it. Slowly, aware of every sound around you, you push the door. Your livingroom was as messy as you had left it. At one difference, the wall. Every frame you had put up on the walls were thrown away. Most of them on the ground and broken, with shattered glasses everywhere.

Why would the creep empty the walls ? To write on it. Of course they would write on it. You laugh bitterly for yourself. You couldn't see their stupids fucking signs anymore, so they had to improve. To force you to read their creepy obsessive text. You hear the crushing of a broken piece of glass, as if someone had stepped on it. But it wasn't you.

You're on alert. Every one of your senses on crisis. Was your mind playing tricks on you ? It was possible in this hellish house who did nothing but give you nightmares recently. You don't realize how you stopped breathing. Only calming when three long minutes had gone without another sound to be heard.

Nothing is here. You're alone, you think. Everything is good. You'll just grab your stuff and leave. Regaining your breath, you bring your attention back on the wall. Words were written on it in deep crimson red. Is that blood ? No, it can't be. Probably paint to give a creepy look that'll catch your attention. You approach the wall to better understand the message.

'She's not here anymore'

The need to throw up almost won. A dark feeling in your guts was telling you 'she' was your friend. But you didn't know. She responded to you, after all. You talked to her. So she had to be okay. She had to. You put your hand on your belly to soothe that want to vomit. You take big breath before finally leaving the livingroom. You quickly make your way to your room where you meet your bare bed. Where are your sheets ? What the hell ? But you don't want to stay longer so you throw clothes in your bag in a hurry.

The front door slam shut. And you know it's the end.

You already feel the tears drowning your sight. Trying to stay silent, you hide in your closet almost empty with how many times you came here to grab clothes. Your hand clasp against your mouth to avoid doing any noise.

Slow footsteps can be heard in the empty apartment. With your shaky hands, you fail to unlock your phone. Your vision is blurry, you can't touch the correct keys. The worst is that you can't see where the creep is. If they stay silent, they can enter the room you're in without you even noticing. And this idea is horrifying. But on another side, you'd preferred them to kill you by surprise so you don't have to affront them.

Your cries intensify, in your despair, you drop your phone straight on the ground. The footsteps stops abrutly. Three distincts knocks are echoing on the corridor's wall. They are coming toward you. You're fucked. They're coming ! What do you do ? What did you do ? Why is this happening ?

Kneeling like you could in the closed space, you reach your hand to grab your phone. As soon as your finger grazes it, the phone vibrate and your ringtone start playing for the whole building to hear. No, no, no, no, no ! Ethan. Ethan is calling you. You pick up despite everything but as soon as you do so, the call is cut short. Fuck E, why would you do that !

The criminal's footsteps are louder, quicker, heavier. They're running. They're running here ! You hold the closet door shut with your both hands, praying for your life. You only have knives in your kitchen, but it's too late now. If you go out, they'll see you. You realized at that moment that whatever you were doing, you couldn't win. That you never even stood a chance against them.

Everything was illusion.

Nothing was improving, you knew it, in fact. You were lying to yourself, searching comfort in a man that don't even understand the dept of the problem. Of your problem. And your friend ? You don't want to talk about her. You don't want to open your eyes just yet. You just want to live in your nice little lies you made up for yourself. You're nice with them, in fact, you like them. Nobody wanted to help you anyway. They could have saved you, you and her, but nobody listened.

Now, it's too late.

The closet start to shake. Widening your eyes, you realize that the creep had start to punch it with their bare fist. You don't give a fuck about being heard anymore, you're bailing your eyes out. Begging for them to let you go, screaming, yelling, calling for help. Holding the door for dear life as if it was going to save you, because in your head it was. But the door didn't last long.

A hole is quickly created in the door. You thought you'd see someone's face, wether it be a man, a woman, whatever. But you saw a white plastic mask instead.

Ghostface.

Why was a damn Ghostface chasing after you? Was it all a sick joke from the start ? You swear you were seeing his eyes boring into yours through the mask. You swore you already saw them somewhere. Ghostface tilts their face to the side, as if mocking you. They were telling you that you were stuck, that it was the end. You hoped they'd kill you.

You couldn't live like this anymore.

In the hole of the closet, Ghostface pass his gloved hand. The latter lay on your shaky face, on your cheek to be exact. You feel the fabric against your skin and think of biting his fingers off. No, you'll angry him. If he's going to kill you, that it be in the least painful way.

"Ethan, right ? Does he treat you so well you forgot about me?" his changed voice said. A weird and creepy robotic voice, one you knew you'd never forget.

You were moving your head left to right. You didn't know why. Probably to tell you didn't want to die, probably to avoid looking into his eyes. He laughs, sounding like a rumbling.

"Ending things right now would be such a waste."

No ! You thought you were finally free ! Why would he chases you down for so long without acting on it !? His gloved hand retract and the door slowly open in an acute creaking. The man is finally revealed before you. He was wearing the whole outfit, the big black robe and the hood.

"It was fun. I give you a gift to reward you for these beautiful screams."

And the knife.

He had a knife in hand. And it was tinged red. Something in you told you it was her. Suddenly, the red writings on your wall had a different meaning.

"I hope you like it, I woked extra hard for it."

Out of nowhere, Ghostface takes your hand, force it open, and lay in it something before forcing it closed. He laughs deeply. One of his hand pat your head mockingly before moving up.

"See you later." he said, swinging his knife in a playful manner.

You were absolutely paralyzed. You didn't know what happened. You stayed up without moving for whoever say how long. When your legs finally stopped shaking, you decided to look what the killer had gave you. Slowly opening your hand, your knee buckle and you fall to the ground crying silently at the sight of a nip of your friend's hair.

You curled up on yourself before completly laying down on the ground, tightening the hairs in your hand close to your heart. She was not here anymore. You wanted to fucking die.

Ever since, Ethan was forgotten. He had tried to call you so many times you had blocked his number. You spent the rest of the day crying in your hotel's room. You resented him. So hard. He didn't answer, he was the one calling and giving your position to a fucking criminal, to a murderer! And he didn't answer. He didn't help, like everyone else.

One day later, neighbors complained about a smell coming from an apartment. You didn't cry when they found your friend's dead body. You didn't cry when cops came to interrogate you. The caretaker having told them about you. Your eyes contained so much hatred in them when looking at him the cops had to let him leave to get him away from you. You didn't cry telling the cops how many times you went to see them to ask for help, nor how many times did they reject you. You didn't cry when they told you she was dead for at least a week, and that her boyfriend was missing. You had no tears left in you. It had simply ended you.

All your lies, every single one of them, destroyed. But you needed them. Of course you weren't talking to her by text, you never did. And fuck, you don't even want to know who was answering instead of her. It was so obvious how she never wanted to call, how she was never leaving her house. But the eye you saw at the peephole. The fucking eye...

You don't want to think about it.

Ethan tried to talk to you. He went to your hotel and found you. You didn't bother to move this time as you were done with your life. He fell to his knee and started begging and crying for your forgivness. Did you even love him ? Or were you, are you, just lonely ? Unfortunately, you decided to forgot the anger you had against him when you realized he was the only thing you had. Your only support. The only one knowing you were a victim. You spent the days crying in his arms.

"Shhh, shhh, I'm here, love. It's okay." he reassured you, again.

It was a routine, now. You'd sleep the days away and when you'd wake up, you'd find yourself crying inconsolably. Everything was your fault, you kept repeating in your head. She's fucking dead because of you.

You wanted to end it all but Ethan wanted you alive at every cost. He was brushing your hair, feeding, washing and changing you. You were a lifeless doll. Sometimes, his roomate would come and talk to you. Most of the times, you don't even realize he's talking to you, too lost in your thought to proceed his presence.

"It's okay, everything's okay."

Ethan hugs you firmly. Kissing your hairline. His t-shirt was damped. Your eyes were burning. Every time you closed them, the picture of your friend would come and haunt you, a new nightmare coming. You weren't able to think about something else anymore. But it was your fault. You put her in danger, you got her killed. It was you Ghostface wanted, not her. You got her killed.

"I want to leave..." you whispered in a voice so hoarse, so weak, it didn't sound like yours. His hand goes on the back of your head to pull you towards him.

"No, no my love. It's okay. I'll protect you. You won't be alone anymore." his leg goes over yours and crushes them to prevents you from moving.

Alone.

Have you ever been alone in your life ? No, he was here all along. He was watching you all along. You never were truly alone. He had your adress, your friend's adress, your number and even Ethan's name. No, he's always here. Lurking.

"Just... Stay with me, I'll protect you. Please, don't leave me." he begs.

He looked calm, surprisingly calm being given the situation. But you needed it, in a way. If he doesn't freak out, you don't need to. (you coudn't, even if you wanted to) He probably know what to do. It was too late for you but he could do something. Maybe. His behaviour was slightly comforting. It was dangerous, mostly for him. He probably didn't even know what he was doing, he probably didn't know what he was getting himself into, in fact.

But once, just for once, you wanted to be helped. You wanted someone to listen to your pleas. He was going to die, it was a fact. And yeah, maybe you were selfish, you were condamning him after all.

"I feel like I'm using you. Like I manipulated you. you say, mostly for your own conscience than for his safety.

-Use me, love. I don't care. Manipulate me, whatever. I swore I'd help you. And if I have to risk my life doing it, I'll do it. I love you. You don't know the things I'd do for you.

-Now, you're the one manipulating me...

It was true. He was forcing you to think you had a chance in getting out of this situation when you knew there were none.

-Oh baby, you have no idea how manipulative I can be to obtain what I want.

-If you say so." you whisper, drifting to sleep once again, knowing you'd wake up hours later in the same position, in the same problem and knowing you killed your friend.

have you ever considerated yourself as unloveable ??

illusion [ethan landry x reader]

requests for ethan are open!

pre - ghostface / no ghostface alternate! no spoilers for scream 6!

pairing: ethan landry x gender neutral reader

notes: enemies/academic rivals to lovers trope <3__<3, not proofread, this is almost 10k words,,

"Pop quiz."

The key words that sent the classroom of college students into despair as soon as they left the professor's mouth. The unpreparedness of the young adults was gauged by the groans and soft curses that followed the announcement before quiet fell upon the classroom, only the sounds of keys clacking and frustrated pens tapping heard against the silence. You were ready despite the surprise, having taken detailed notes and studied over them without the knowledge or pressure of a quiz.

The inability to change their fates led to complaints mumbled all around you. You listened intently to the grievances, realizing that the only ones who remained quiet in the sea of traveling whispers were you and the antagonist of your life - Ethan Landry.

There was an unspoken competition between you and Ethan that neither of you verbally acknowledged but were both acutely aware of. It was a race to see who scored better most often, carefully kept up with by your classmate. You were vaguely aware of the lack of supporters on your side, the overwhelming majority rooting for Ethan. The way Ethan rallied people effortlessly while you sat in silence each class fueled your anger, each whisper and laugh from behind you making your heart thump.

Usually, you were on par with Ethan despite your lack of fans, but math was always a tough subject; a few simple mistakes have led to your downfall. You devoted hours to secure your place as a top performer - time and effort you were positive Ethan didn't match. His smiles were too easy, body too relaxed throughout each grade returned. Ethan was overconfident and you wished for nothing more than for his arrogance to bite him in the ass one day.

You didn't allow yourself to view your score after you submitted your quiz, moving out of the tab without a peek. Your desire to find out Ethan's score before yours became a routine of staying in your seat until the whispers behind you revealed what you wanted to know. Knowing Ethan's score first intensified either the satisfaction or disappointment you would feel upon viewing your own score. Pretty soon, beating Ethan had become your biggest motivation. You measured your value through these constant comparisons, for you were worthless when you stood on your own.

A storm of whispers began once someone peeked at Ethan's screen. It didn't take long for the voices to move toward your area from its origin in the row behind you, hushed voices repeating the words "failed" and "30." You rolled the information over in your hear; if Ethan had scored 30 points, he didn't do that poorly, but a 30%? He had to be upset over a 30/35; there wasn't a chance that Ethan Landry could've made a 30%. The absurdity made you shake your head and smile. The whispers stopped suddenly as a laptop shut with too much force and shuffling sounds followed. You turned your head slightly to see Ethan walk out of the room, unable to figure him out.

By the time you gathered your things and stepped out into the empty hallway, Ethan was long gone.

「 ... 」

The next time you were forced into the same room as Ethan Landry was Thursday. Class ended but you were stuck to your seat, copious notes filling the pages of your notebook. They were not neat; those would be created in the library while the information was fresh. You picked up after yourself quickly; students flocked to the library in waves at this hour.

-

Ethan waited until class was officially over before moving out of his seat, feet feeling unusually heavy in his slow strides toward you. It didn't take him long to reach you, considering he was seated behind you, but he delayed reaching his destination as much as he could. He stood a few feet away from where you were, quickly shoving your things into your bag. He thought you'd be more organized.

As Ethan stood in your vicinity, he had shamelessly assumed you'd notice him without him having to utter a word to you.

Ethan's opinion of you changed drastically during the class; in the beginning, Ethan Landry thought you were gorgeous.

It wasn't long before Ethan realized you were a hard worker too and he wondered how someone could be so perfect. But you were everything he wasn't and Ethan Landry was not good at romance so he gave up on the insane idea of ever speaking to you.

His biggest mistake was sitting so close to you, his nerves controlling him for the better part of those first few weeks. This nervousness when it came to anything related to you was obvious when his face dropped the second he glanced at you or accidentally made eye contact; it was obvious when he would quickly turn his head away whenever you came near. You'd never spoken to him and he'd rather keep it that way - Ethan didn't know what horrific things would leave his mouth in your presence.

These developments only fueled your dislike for Ethan. All you could find yourself doing was complaining about Ethan with more frequency to the point your best friend was tired of you, this close to making an Ethan Jar where you'd put money in any time you talked about him.

Ethan wasn't sure when his feelings toward you changed - perhaps it was the intimidating aura that surrounded you, which quickly crushed any fantasy he had of acquainting himself with you. The fear that you were an awful person overtook everything else and was supported by your refusal to help the classmates around you that were clearly struggling in the class, the uninterested and cold looks you gave out burned into the back of his brain. Despite his hesitancy to accept it, Ethan was starting to believe that you had some sort of superiority complex over everyone else.

Yet here he was, about to find out how accurate his suspicions were as he begged for your help.

You didn't acknowledge Ethan as you continued packing up your things. Giving you the benefit of the doubt, Ethan called out your name.

You didn't answer.

Were you seriously ignoring him?

Ethan was growing annoyed now, eyebrows furrowing as he tried to understand your behavior. How could a person be so rude?

"Holy shit!" Your voice rang loud in the empty classroom and Ethan jumped at the sound. You mirrored the action, hand on your chest in shock. You hadn't realized he was there.

You took your earbuds out and watched curiously as a bright red flush passed over Ethan's face.

Oh.

"Did you... need something?" You tried to keep your distaste for Ethan out of your voice, confusion and curiosity keeping you from walking away.

"Yeah... I mean, no," Ethan's confidence faltered from his mistake and he suddenly remembered how beginning-of-the-year Ethan would've never dared to do this.

"O...kay?" You were starting to get weirded out now, your contempt for the boy in front of you becoming more apparent by the second. You moved past him, sighing in irritation as you tapped your phone screen for the time; the library would be booked by now.

You began the route to the library regardless, knowing you wouldn't get any work done in the cramped space you shared with your messy roommate.

You hadn't realized or, more accurately, didn't want to assume Ethan was following you until you had been walking for a while and the heavier thud of a pair of footsteps didn't fade or falter. You stopped and turned around, even more annoyed now.

"What?" You demanded expectedly.

Ethan bit back his pride and irritation. "I do. Actually need something."

You couldn't help the roll of your eyes and the tone of your voice. "I asked you - "

"Yeah, I know," Ethan snapped back.

Kittens. Puppies. Rainbows. You took a deep breath, calming the bubbling exasperation in your throat.

"What is it that you need, Ethan?"

A jolt ran through Ethan and struck him speechless as he realized that was the first time he'd ever heard his name leave your mouth. It was -

"Seriously?" Your arms were crossed, unimpressed and frustrated. Every second that you wasted entertaining Ethan was another seat lost in the library.

"I failed the pop quiz. Like... failed," Ethan confessed without a bite in his voice, causing your arms to drop to your sides in surprise.

"Oh," you said softly, suddenly feeling guilty that your nonverbal wish for his failure had come true.

"I didn't really understand the lesson, I guess," Ethan closed his eyes, attempting to swallow his pride for just another second. "So, can you help me? I know you're the only one who actually passed."

You briefly wondered how Ethan knew, considering no one was interested in peeking at your score like they were with Ethan and you'd made quick work of closing out of your score the second you received it.  

You didn't answer for a moment, debating on what you should do. You could laugh in his face and walk away. You could.

But you didn't.

"Come on," you turned back around as you replied, continuing the route you had been interrupted from following. "The library's probably packed."

「 ... 」

The severity of your situation over weighed the feeling of satisfaction that came with being right as you entered the overcrowded library, your favorite seat taken. You sighed as you scanned the library for a place you and Ethan could sit. The universe seemed to laugh at you when you realized the only available spot you'd both fit in was the tiniest couch in the room.

You grabbed Ethan's arm and dragged him over to the spot, trying to keep the flush on your face down as you took a seat, squeezing into the edge of the couch as much as you could. You were expressionless as Ethan took a hesitant seat next to you, tension in the air as the two of you tried to create as much space between the two of you as possible. It was counterproductive, considering each attempt brought you two uncomfortably closer. You finally cleared your throat, reaching for your bag and taking out your notes. You refrained from sighing as you flipped past your most recent ones - they would have to wait.

"So," your voice was low despite the secluded area you found yourselves in, landing on the lessons the pop quiz had focused on. The pages of orderly and precise notes surprised Ethan; you put more effort into those notes than Ethan had into anything. "Where do you wanna start?"

「 ... 」

The library was closing soon and the two of you gathered your things. You walked in front of Ethan, unsure of where he was going; but you didn't walk fast enough for him not to be able to catch up.

Ethan had no idea where you were going but you didn't stop him from walking with you, a sign he took as good.

The study session had gone well, but it frustrated him how well you taught him the material. When he didn't quite grasp something you switched it up and explained it differently until he did, recognizing his learning patterns and using them to try to help him as much as possible. He thought you'd be a pain in the ass about the whole thing and brag about how well you'd done compared to him. He expected you to beat you down while he was low but you remained civil, even showed him kindness and Ethan was slowly starting to think that maybe he didn't really know you.

Though something about your behavior bothered him. It wasn't like you were terrible at teaching difficult concepts to others. Of course, you didn't owe anyone anything, but wasn't it the polite thing to do? He'd always heard complaints from his classmates that you were unhelpful and the difference in the way you treated people fired something up in Ethan.

Ethan simply couldn't understand you and those unresolved feelings got him angry all over again.

He stopped walking just as you began wondering how long he'd trail you in silence for. You stopped too, turning to give him a curious glance.

“Why are you so mean?” He asked suddenly, brows furrowed in anger and confusion.

“Excuse me?” You scoffed, clearly offended. You'd just spent hours of your own time helping Ethan and he called you mean?

“To everyone else,” Ethan clarified. “Why don't you help people when they need? Do you think you're better than them or something? You ignore anyone who makes below an A?”

“Are you fucking joking?” You were as angry as Ethan was now, taking a heated step in his direction. “If you thought I was such an asshole, why'd you ask me for help?” You questioned rhetorically, interrupting Ethan as you saw him open his mouth. You felt abnormally hot, anger the only thing fueling you now. It was suddenly clear now and you could hear your heart pound in anger at Ethan's accusations. Like it was your fault no one approached you.

“Well, I’m sorry I don't insert myself when it's not my business. I can't read people's minds. Do you think anyone actually...” You took a breath as your voice shook with frustration. “No one fucking talks to me.” It was the sad truth of your situation; your classmates ignored you so you ignored them. You weren't one to strike up awkward conversations just for the sake of it.

Ethan’s anger melted away as his composure fell, just slightly. Regret washed over him as he realized, too late again, his mistake.

You wanted to say something else, to prove to him that it didn't bother you, but your embarrassment mixed with your anger in the worst way as you felt tears begin to sting your eyes. Don't cry in front of him, please, fuck.

You turned around swiftly, deciding it was better to get back to your dorm than continue making a fool of yourself. By the end of the night, you were only sure of one thing; you absolutely hated Ethan Landry.

「 ... 」

You hadn't expected Ethan to come up to you again, praying the embarrassment of his misjudgments would keep him away from you. You were right for a week or two, classes passing by with no contact with Ethan Landry except for accidental eye contact that flustered you both.

To think you had been beginning to warm up to him while studying. Maybe he wasn't so bad, you had been close to admitting defeat. You scoffed at that thought now. The only thing you hated more than arrogant people were people who couldn't form opinions on their own. Ethan had told you all you needed to know with the simple accusations he threw your way.

However, Ethan didn't stay away for long. The scene gave you deja vu; you were packing up your stuff when a figure approached and something in you knew it was Ethan. It was eerie how quiet he could be compared to how boisterous he usually was in class.

You ignored Ethan's quiet advances towards you on purpose this time, gathering your materials in a hurry. You moved too quickly, your notebook dropping and loose papers scattering all over the floor. Ethan dropped to the floor before you could protest, picking up the sheets. By the time you crouched down he had collected them all, neatly shaking them into a pile. Ethan tried for a smile as he handed the stack to you.

"Thanks," you muttered, collecting your things off the ground. Despite it all, you remained polite. The both of you stared at each other and you slung your bag onto your shoulder, its heaviness creating an ache where it rested. You two stood there a moment just like you had all those weeks ago, though this time there was a thick tension in the air, both of you unsure of what the other would say next.

"Could we..." Ethan gulped, nervousness evident in the way he tapped his shoulders nervously against the strap of his bag. "Could we talk? We could get something to eat, or a coffee, or just... talk?"

Your expression didn't falter from the cold stare you gave him, outwardly unresponsive to his words as you internally thought it over.

“You know, I'd really prefer it if we didn't," you responded coolly. "You're welcome never to speak to me again, though?" You made a move to continue forward and Ethan instinctively stepped closer.

“I'm sorry.” Ethan tried desperately, shoulders slumping and eyes pleading.

Maybe he did mean it, but you didn't want to accept it.You weren't sure what it mattered to him so much. He could've pretended you were the person he thought you were and moved on. After all, you'd barely given him, weren't giving him, any reason to believe otherwise.

“Sure.” You pushed past him. It was immature and you knew it, but you didn't stop yourself from doing it anyway.

Although there was something that bothered you about Ethan Landry, something different than before. You couldn't quite place your finger on what it was about him despite you rolling over all your conversations and interactions.

That conversation played over and over in your head. You could see it clearly every time; the way anger flayed Ethan's features and created cruel words to fall out of his mouth. The way the anger in you pooled and you did the same.

You remembered the way Ethan was consumed with regret. You only saw a portion of it, you were sure. A part of you knew it ran deeper than you'd ever be able to see and maybe even understand.

After another afternoon of thinking it over, you laid in bed and picked over each detail once again. There was a problem here, one that was hiding its solution from you. There was a missing piece, you were sure, a fatal flaw with the equation that kept you up all night. You sat up suddenly, as the awful realization hit you. You realized, with urgency, that you might've just become the world's biggest hypocrite.

「 ... 」

Ethan hadn't realized that his opinion of you was capable of changing. He maybe, definitely shouldn't have thought so little of you before he even spoke to you. He rolled over in bed each night, your voice echoing in his head. The hurt in your eyes, your guarded body language. Ethan had to do something.

He didn't need you to accept your apology. He didn't crave forgiveness. He just needed to know you. That had been the root of all his issues with you. He'd believed things without ever actually seeing them for himself, picking and choosing what supported his assumptions. Ethan never had the full story and that had been his biggest mistake.

Ethan spent the next few days with nothing but you on his mind, spending hours deciding on a course of action. He wasn't sure how you'd react given your last interaction. You had remained calm and composed but he knew you didn't like him. He didn't like him. Your response was entirely justified and Ethan knew, whatever the outcome was, he would accept it. If you truly never wanted to speak to him again, he would stay as far away from you as he could manage.

Ethan waited for you after class, relief washing over as he spotted you in the large crowd that had formed. He started walking backwards in front of you, forcing you to keep your attention on him.

"Before you tell me to go away," Ethan began, making sure your earbuds weren't in. You stopped walking suddenly and his heart dropped - but you reached out to grab him.

"Watch where you're going," you muttered, but there was no heat to it, motioning back to the person Ethan had almost bumped in to.

"Thanks." Ethan grinned at you, his excitement almost overflowing out of him.

"Do you have a second?" Ethan asked cautiously, glancing at your expression.

"You're already talking." You put your hands on your hips, a tiredness suddenly becoming evident as your face and shoulders fell.

Ethan had a sudden urge to reach out and comfort you, though he refrained.

"I came up with a really great idea. I promise it's a win-win," Ethan stopped to check your face, unrelenting eyes staring back at him.

"We hang out - " Ethan began and you rolled your eyes. "Three times. Just three. I get to know you. You get to bask in the fact that I'm wrong and you're right and call me an idiot?" Ethan's plan came out more like a question than a statement, his confidence dropping with your unimpressed demeanor.

"Why?" You asked suddenly and genuinely, unable to understand why Ethan Landry, out of all people, wanted to admit he was wrong.

"I..." Ethan held his bottom lip between his teeth nervously, rocking on his feet as he continued. "You're not the person I thought you were." He confessed honestly, hoping that his eyes revealed the truth.

You weren't sure why you agreed. It was a completely stupid idea. Maybe the loneliness of your limited social circle was catching up to you, or the weary glances everyone threw your way were beginning to sting. Perhaps if you realized Ethan was really as bad as you thought, you wouldn't have to feel so guilty about your hypocritical speculation. Maybe it was that part of you that wanted to change, to break the cycle of unrealistic comparisons and the high bar you held yourself to. Maybe if you came to the grand realization that you could be wrong sometimes, you could become just a little bit happier with yourself.

「 ... 」

Ethan, unsurprisingly, texted you first. You assumed he'd only use it to create plans, but his name popped up on your screen with increasing frequency.

you

this wasnt part of the deal.

ethan

we never set any rules about texting...

:|>

you

wtf is that supposed to be?

ethan

... im sticking my tongue out at you?

you

?????

You shook your head at the strangest emoticon you'd seen, your screen slowly fading to black after you sent your reply. In your phone's reflection, you caught yourself smiling.

「 ... 」

Ethan wasted no time in creating plants, asking you if you were free that weekend. You were, and he thought it was "cool." You stared longer at the text than you should've, a little curious as to what he would plan.

Ethan caught up with you after class, graduating from sending friendly smiles and small waves to you from across the room. He fell into step with you, matching your shorter strides.

"I was thinking about what to do this weekend," Ethan began casually, as if the two of you hanging out was the most normal thing in the world. "How about the movies?" Ethan asked with a bright smile.

You laughed, a little taken aback as you saw Ethan's expression.

“No way.” You responded.

“What? Why?” Ethan's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Are you kidding? You seriously don't know?” You asked in a bit of disbelief.

Ethan shook his head and you almost felt sorry that he was so clueless.

“When a guy asks someone to the movies, he usually wants to... you know...”

You watched as the realization hit Ethan, his eyes widening and his face reddening.

“Ohmygod, I didn't mean - “

Then you laughed. You truly, genuinely laughed at Ethan's expression and perhaps a bit at his expense. Despite this, Ethan's face transformed into a small smile and he let out a little laugh along with you.

“Ok, bad idea. We can watch a movie at my dorm?"

You gave Ethan a look, a light smile still lingering on your face. “Ethan. that's even worse.”

“Shit, sorry, let's just scrap the movie. Wanna get lunch?”

「 ... 」

The weekend came quickly and you found yourself looking forward to hanging out with Ethan. His texts were no longer getting on your nerves and you found yourself replying almost instantly each time, no matter what you were in the middle of doing.

Ethan waited outside your dorm building for you. He didn't have to but he did anyway, eyes lighting up as soon as he saw you.

"Lead the way." You smiled gently and despite his nod, Ethan walked next to you. He began talking, nervously at first, then you joined in here and there and eventually the two of you walked in comfortable conversation. It wasn't long before you reached your destination, a simple campus cafe with mediocre food but didn't require traveling out to the city.

The two of you walked up to the counter, ordering the best things the menu had to offer despite its limited options. Ethan went first, opting for a sandwich and a lemonade. He paid and moved out of the way for you. Once you confirmed your separate order with the worker, Ethan's hand hurried to try to tap his card against the screen. You looked at him quizzically as you placed a firm hand on his, trapping it against the counter. "What are you doing?" You seemed to ask him and he moved his hand away apologetically, neither of you wanting to argue. You paid for your meal - you would not be indebted to Ethan Landry.

The two of you sat near one of the giant windows that doubled as a wall for the cafe, allowing you to peer out and watch students walk by. You and Ethan sat across from each other and the silence that swallowed the two of you was awkward, a complete 180 from the easy-flowing conversation from earlier.

Ethan's eyes flickered from you to the window and back, fingers tapping nervously on the table. Although you couldn't see it directly, you knew his leg was bouncing from under the table, a habit you had picked up on.

It was up to you to start talking. You forced your eyes back to Ethan, offering him a resigning smile. Your eyes landed on his as your mouth opened to speak, but your words failed. The sun was shining just the right way on Ethan, rays of warm light creating a curious glint in his eyes. You'd thought they were a basic brown before but realized the depth of them now, the sun exposing the warmth in them. Ethan raised a hand to shield his eyes from the harsh light, eyes crinkling and nose scrunching. The sudden realization that Ethan was beautiful hit you suddenly and with urgency as if it were a revolutionary breakthrough you had to proclaim.

You cleared your throat and your mind and Ethan's hand dropped, moving to support his chin as he moved his focus from the sun to you.

"So, you like Star Wars?" You asked rather softly, wondering where to place the thought that had suddenly intruded your brain.

Ethan's eyes widened and he straightened. "How'd you know?"

You motioned downwards toward Ethan's Star Wars wallet, still resting on the table. Ethan's face visibly fired up as he grabbed his wallet and stuffed it into his pocket.

"Are you... a fan?" Ethan asked weakly.

"No way. I mean, the movies are so long and they get so boring. The entire thing is so confusing - I mean, no offense..." You trailed off, realizing that if Ethan owned a Star Wars wallet, Ethan probably really liked Star Wars.

And clearly, Ethan had taken offense.

"Well, first of all, the movies are not long and boring. The story itself is so intricate you have to pay close attention - but it's actually good. Plus, the first movie was super revolutionary and completely ahead of its time - "

You stifled a giggle as Ethan avidly attempted to defend his favorite franchise, hands flailing as he emphasized his points. You had never seen him so passionate.

"Hey, this is a very serious debate," Ethan said, although there was a widening smile on his face.

"No, no, you're right. Please keep going," you encouraged and Ethan rolled his eyes with a smile.

"What is your biggest issue with the franchise?"

"Hmmm..." You placed your hand on your chin, deep in thought. "I always fall asleep while trying to watch the movies."

Ethan leaned back with a sigh. "That is literally a you problem."

You laughed again, shaking your head. "No way. It's not my fault the movies are so boring I fall asleep."

"It totally is!" Ethan's eyebrows moved with the fluctuations of his voice, hands exasperatedly pointed at you while you continued laughing.

“I can't back down from this one. You're gonna have to admit you're wrong this time."

"Hey, I never said I was right," you countered. "I just told you what I thought."

"Well, you seem like you always want to be right. Are you?" Ethan's tone was gentle and curious, not condescending like you expected, seemingly wanting to know more.

Your shoulders rose in a small shrug as you thought the question over.

"I do want to be... it does feel nice," you answered decisively. "But I don't have to be. Sometimes you have to sacrifice it to keep the peace, you know?" That was a lesson you'd learned the hard way, the loud mouth you had during your childhood slowly giving way to a calmer, harder disposition.

"Yeah," Ethan said softly. "I get that." And something in his voice told you he really did.

「 ... 」

It wasn't long until Ethan became your personal Baader-Meinhof phenomenon, appearing with increasing frequency seemingly out of nowhere. You were greeted by the sight of him on your way to classes you didn't share, Ethan engaging in conversation with you until he was forced to let you go. You weren't aware that most of Ethan's classes were on the opposite side of campus - if he even had them at all.

Ethan's habit of walking you to class mixed with his recurring texts, his name popping up at the top of your screen multiple times a day.

Ethan had become an integral part of your routine. His texts would come in as soon as your classes ended, inquiring about how they went. The two of you would text until one of you wiped out (usually Ethan and usually before 10 p.m.).

You hung around until you spotted Ethan, hard to miss with his curly hair and his tall stature. The overcast day presaged the cold winter months that would soon reach their peak. You watched as his eyes scanned for you, face breaking out into a smile as soon as he spotted you. Your expression mirrored his as the two of you weaved between the bodies making up a small crowd until finally, you stood in front of each other.

"Hey," you greeted, lips stretching into an even wider smile.

"Hey." Ethan's teeth made an appearance as he rocked back and forth. Nervous habit. He had something to say, you could tell. However, you weren't going to force it out of him.

Even in the gray wash of light Ethan was radiant. He brought a warmth that took off the bite of the cold New York air.

The two of you began talking about anything, beginning the journey to your first class of the morning. Ethan's shoulders bumped yours as you walked, quickly approaching your destination.

Ethan took a breath as the two of you stopped just outside your classroom, turning his body to face you finally.

"So, I was thinking," Ethan started, carefully watching the changes in your expression.

"Woah, that's new," you teased as Ethan sighed cordially.

"Okay, now I don't feel bad for what I'm about to say," Ethan continued and your heart stammered anxiously. "Our next official hangout is watching Star Wars."

You groaned.

"Before you say anything, please keep in mind - I don't care." Ethan said proudly, watching as your expression contorting into one of displeasure while your shoulders sagged.

"You're the worst," you started, but Ethan just smiled, nodding for you to go on. "And I could totally overrule you. I can literally block you and never speak to you again."

Ethan's eyes widened and his mouth opened to say something. Did you take it too far?

"I'm kidding," you said quickly before embarrassment could stop you. "I will... give Star Wars another chance."

You turned away from Ethan in an attempt to hide the prominent flush on your cheeks, missing the way his cheeks lit up to match yours.

"Wait!" Ethan called before you could enter your class, which you were almost going to be late to. "Where are we gonna watch it?"

You turned around once again, giving him a curious glance as his face turned a bright red.

"You know... because of what you said last time?"

You stared at him for a second before you finally laughed, comprehending what he was referencing.

"Ethan, we can watch it at your dorm, it's fine. I trust you. I mean, as long as you don't mind?"

Ethan visibly gulped, his heart acting so wildly his chest was starting to hurt.

"No. No, I don't mind."

"Okay," you placed your hand on the door of your classroom, sending Ethan one last smile. "Text me," you said, as if he wouldn't have regardless.

「 ... 」

Ethan warned you that his shared dorm was small, but you didn't mind. Nothing could be as bad as yours.

Ethan's room was much more spacious than yours, considering he resided in a different building notoriously known for its larger spaces. Ethan and his roommate had a bathroom and a washer/dryer set right in their dorms along with a kitchen! To say you were jealous was an understatement - communal kitchens were your walking nightmare.

There was a lack of living room space, forcing you and Ethan to share his bed. He took a seat against the wall with his laptop and a variety of snacks respectfully placed between the two of you, creating a barrier you almost caught yourself wishing wasn't there. Ethan's roommate was the only thing missing from the picture, but you weren't curious enough to inquire; Ethan didn't mention him and you didn't weren't interested enough to care.

Ethan at least gave you the choice of starting the series with the first movie release-date wise or the first movie in the Star Wars time line. You didn't really know what that meant, so you chose what would hopefully be the less confusing one for you to grasp. You wondered, for a moment, if Ethan thought about watching the entire franchise with you. You wondered if you'd let him.

You took the time Ethan spent on loading up The Phantom Menace to look around his room, the distinction between his side and his roommate's made evident by Ethan's posters. They ranged from video games to movie posters and what you assumed were his favorite artists. You examined them carefully, trying to memorize each one. They seemed special, like a part of Ethan that you didn't know just yet.

Ethan tapped your shoulder softly, motioning towards his laptop screen, indicating the movie was ready to start. Ethan's smile was one of the most genuine you'd seen to date, parted lips showing off the perfect teeth that made you suspicious when he swore he'd never had braces. Some people are just born perfect.

No, you chided yourself, he's smiling this hard over Star Wars.

You laughed at your own thoughts. "You're such a nerd."

Ethan's smile faltered and panic took over your system. "I didn't mean - It's not bad -" You sighed in an attempt to compose yourself.

"It's cute." You stated finally, decisively, and Ethan's smile returned. He didn't say anything, which you were thankful for, instead pressing play on the movie. You could only hope the opening scene muffled the sound of your heart racing.

Star Wars wasn't as boring as you remembered, though you weren't sure how much of your excitement you could contribute to the actual movie when Ethan would make small comments every-so-often that would make you smile. Whether they were jokes, criticisms, or history about the scene, each one left you craving the sound of Ethan's voice, low and steady, in your ear again.

You weren't sure how you ended up so close to Ethan but everything about the scene was lulling you to sleep: the scent of fresh laundry mixing with a scent on Ethan's skin you couldn't quite place. the warmth he radiated against the creeping cold of the night, his smooth voice whispering stupid pieces of information in your ear, especially the lullaby of a movie in the background.

You drifted off at some unknown time despite your efforts to fight the heavy weight of sleep. You'd really tried to stay up to watch the movie in its entirety, to give it and Ethan's opinion of it a fighting chance, but your body wouldn't have it. Your head fell, finding a place on Ethan's shoulder rather uncomfortably considering his long torso. Ethan panicked for a moment once he realized the sudden weight on his shoulder was you, fast and peacefully asleep on him. It took him a few seconds to react as he sat there starting before he slumped down slowly, carefully guiding your head, trying to prevent you from straining your neck.

From what he could recall, there were about thirty minutes left of the movie. It was one of his favorite parts yet all Ethan could do was focus on your soft breaths and the way his heart pounded, hoping the loud thumping wouldn't wake you up.

The movie ended and Ethan's laptop joined you in sleep, leaving him stranded in the dark. He made no motion to move, however, choosing the ache that was starting to form in his back over disrupting your sleep. It was the most peaceful he'd ever seen you, so different from the witty comments you sent his way now that you two were... friends? 

Ethan wasn't sure what it was and he didn't want to think about it, considering it only came to be out of a stupid agreement. One that was almost up; only one more chance to be with you before the two of you either continued whatever you had going on or went your separate ways. For someone who strongly disliked you just a few weeks ago, Ethan suddenly had a hard time getting behind the idea of never speaking to you again. Never being close to you like this again.

Ethan sprang out of his thoughts as the door opened as loudly as it could've possibly sounded, breaking the soft silence that had encompassed the two of you. Chad's loud voice boomed throughout the small room - as if the door hadn't properly announced his arrival.

The sound woke you up and the presence of someone else jolted you away from Ethan as if you got caught doing something you shouldn't. Ethan's back was the only part of him that felt relieved, already missing the distinct scent of you.

"Shit, sorry, I didn't realize you had someone over," Chad said with a small laugh and Ethan tried his best not to be annoyed.

"I don't - It's not like that," Ethan insisted with a blush on his face as he shut his laptop.

"Yeah, sure," Chad sent you a wink and a small, awkward laugh escaped you. "I'm Chad."

You introduced yourself with a smile and Ethan couldn't help but glance between the two of you. Of course Chad had to be wearing one of his tightest shirts, one of the ones that showed off his array of bulging muscles. Ethan wondered if you preferred guys like him, a sudden urge to know your type bursting within him.

You checked your phone, a yawn interrupting you as you checked the time. "I should probably get back," you said to no one in particular, though your eyes were glancing at Ethan with a hopeful glance in your eyes.

"I'll walk you?" Ethan suggested, moving to get up off his bed.

You smiled and nodded and Ethan was relieved he'd finally gotten you right.

「 ... 」

"Sorry I fell asleep." You said sincerely on the walk back.

"Pfft. It's fine. You technically warned me."

"I promise I'll make it up to you."

"As long as it doesn't count towards our three hangouts." Ethan said it with a smile, yet it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"It'll be Hangout 2.5," you promised with a smile, though the thought of the end of your agreement with Ethan had been terrorizing you as much as it had him.

You were approaching your dorm now, the walk going by quicker than it would've without Ethan by your side; you suddenly wished you'd gotten assigned the furthest building from Ethan's.

"So, what'd you think of... Chad?" Ethan's words were slow yet sudden and in a tone you'd never heard him use before.

"Chad?" You asked, the information taking a moment before you realized you'd just met Chad less than 15 minutes ago. "Chad," you repeated, the name sounding strange on your tongue. "I think his name doesn't really suit him. He kind of looks like a James or something."

Ethan laughed, shaking his head at your comment.

"Why do you ask?"

"No reason."

You had a sneaking suspicion Ethan was lying, but lacked any solid evidence to back it up. Though his voice... it was different. Ethan either had a crush on you or had a crush on Chad. You could've believed the latter if Ethan spoke of his roommate more often and more fondly.

That only left one option: Ethan Landry had a crush on you.

It was a reach, you were sure. All the evidence against Ethan could be easily dismissed as him trying to get to know you, which he was. You shook the thought out of your head. There was no way he liked you.

But what if he did?

The two of you were stopped by your door now, Ethan waiting for your final comment of the night before making his way back. He looked at you with big eyes and a shy smile and you had the sudden urge to kiss him.

So you did.

Your lips made contact with Ethan's cheek, slowly and softly, inch by inch. You barely pressed your lips against his skin but you felt the effects immediately, face so warm it radiated. You pulled back and admired Ethan's embarrassed and partially confused smile.

"Thanks for walking me."

Ethan stood there, speechless, and you offered a final wave before opening the door and disappearing behind it.

Ethan stood there, speechless, as he processed what had just happened, if it was just a figment of his imagination.

He stayed there, speechless, as seconds ticked into minutes, confirming that yes, you had just kissed him goodnight.

Ethan's hand was glued to the spot on his cheek where your lips made contact with his cheek, fingertips ghosting over it in an attempt to replicate the feeling.

It was official. His grave was dug. Ethan Landry was totally fucked.

「 ... 」

You'd pretended like nothing had happened, unsure of how to deal with the consequences of your actions. There seemed to be no change in the nature of your relationship with Ethan and you weren't sure if you were grateful or not.

The next (and final) time Ethan invited you to hang out was his riskiest idea yet. He wanted you to travel into the city with him, something you'd always been too busy to do on your own. It was something you'd mentioned to him once or twice and you wondered if he only came up with the idea because of you.

Ethan was a self-proclaimed expert on the area immediately surrounding Blackmore's campus, challenging you to notify him of any cravings you had throughout the day, promising to fulfill your every wish.

He'd asked you to meet you at one of the local campus spots, a coffee shop to start off your adventure. Ethan was shocked when he learned you'd never visited it, insisting it was the best in the area despite its inconvenient location. You rolled your eyes but took his word for it.

You arrived at your destination early, basking in the warmth the small shop provided, sheltering you from the cold air outside. Perhaps it would be the perfect excuse to walk a little too close to Ethan today.

8:49 became 9:03 yet there was no sign of Ethan. It was strange, considering you two agreed on nine on the dot and Ethan was never late. Not when it came to you.

You tried to calm the beat of your heart with scrolling but the distraction didn't work for long. You kept swiping back to the message thread exchanged with Ethan, your message notifying Ethan of your arrival on... delivered.

He couldn't be ignoring you.

An hour passed and you sat in disbelief. You weren't sure why you waited, rifling for excuses that Ethan could possibly present. Excuses you'd accept in a heartbeat. One of the workers was starting to eye you and you were mortified. Ethan Landry had embarrassed you without even showing up.

Your confusion became anger as you picked up your stuff and walked out of the stupid shop, frustrated tears forming in your eyes. You were eerily reminded of that day with Ethan and you wondered with a cold laugh if this had been his plan all along.

Make you fall for him and then teach you a lesson? Did he get back to his room after you kissed him, laughing his head off? Was it that kiss that made him stand you up?

You wondered why you cared, before the agonizing realization that you cared about Ethan Landry struck you. You weren't sure when it happened or how you had allowed it to, but you guessed it didn't matter much now.

You were right about Ethan Landry.

Though, being right had never been so painful.

~

Your phone vibrated obnoxiously in your pocket and a feeling of dread overcame you as you turned it over. Ethan. The angry tears came back and you were far past accepting excuses. You'd left that idea in the shop, putting more distance between you and the last good things you thought of Ethan Landry with each quick stride.

You declined the call and it came in again and again, desperately. Your phone hovered over that red button, no longer giving Ethan a chance. You stopped walking, wiping your eyes as you clicked Ethan's contact. You had just begun furiously typing when you heard your name shouted distantly. Please, no.

Ethan was running towards you, dressed inappropriately for the weather. His hair was messy and his face was red. He gasped for breath once he reached you, his long legs aiding him in his goal while you stood there, unable to move.

“I'm so sorry, I fell asleep - “ Ethan's voice was deeper than usual, raspier. “It's not an excuse, and I'm sorry - “ Ethan stopped and turned to sneeze into the crook of his arm. He sneezed once, twice, three times. No wonder his voice sounded so different.

The coldness of your stature melted away with quick realization, though a hint of anger was still detectable in your voice.

“Jesus, Ethan, are you sick? You could've just told me.” You reached up to cup Ethan's face, pressing your hands against his cheeks and forehead. No fever, at least.

“I'm okay - “

“No, you're not.” The frustration was clear in your voice and Ethan decided it was best not to argue.

“I'm sorry.”

You sighed, taking off your jacket and throwing it around Ethan's shoulders, unsure of how effective the item would be. You wanted to sit there and scold him for coming out in cold weather with the lack of clothes he had on but the look in his eye told you it could wait. You took his hand and shoved it in your pocket as you led him back to where he came from, trying to make the walk back to his dorm quick. The trip with silent save for the occasional sniffles and sneezes, anger mixing with concern. You weren't sure what to feel, too many emotions overcoming you in too short of a time frame.

Ethan opened his dorm weakly, glancing at you as if expecting you to walk away. The rush of his departure was evident and only strengthened the feelings of guilt you carried for doubting Ethan. But what else were you supposed to think?

"Get changed," you ordered, looking disapprovingly at Ethan's current outfit.

You moved to the kitchen, searching for anything warm to make Ethan. He emerged from the bathroom in holiday pajamas, which you supposed where his warmest pair. Ethan folded up your jacket nervously, placing it on a stray table.

You forced him into bed, wrapping him up in as many layers as you could. You came over with a mug of tea, warning Ethan of its temperature before setting it down on his bedside table.

The silence was tense as you took a seat on the edge of Ethan's bed, both of you glancing at the other expectantly.

If Ethan was completely honest, he expected you to be angry. He could've taken more preventative measures to prevent what he'd done. The guilt at the thought of you sitting alone, waiting in vain for him made his chest hurt.

"I'm sorry," Ethan said with emotion cracking through his words.

"I'm not mad, Ethan," you shook your head, turning your body to face him properly.

"I would be. Or at least upset."

"Maybe I'm a little upset," you half-shrugged with a smile that warmed Ethan's heart.

Ethan laughed lightly, though the sweet sound became strained as his nose was blocked off completely, forcing Ethan to begin breathing through his mouth.

"Tissues?" You inquired, looking around the room to see if you could spot any.

"Don't have any," Ethan shook his head. "You should go, I don't want to get you sick." His voice, despite its hoarseness, was filled with sincerity.

You nodded your agreement and Ethan couldn't help but feel an ache as you walked out of his room.

~

You made the trek to the nearest convenience store, searching the aisles for anything Ethan may need. You went for the tissues and the medicine first, hesitating before you doubled back toward the snack aisle.

However, your plan wasn't exactly thought through. You stood, stumped, in front of Ethan's dorm with no way of getting it open.

Your solution walked up to you in jeans and a hoodie, the curious gaze of Chad inspecting the bags of groceries in your arms.

"Ethan's sick," you explained and the concern on Chad's face grew.

"With what?" Chad opened the door for the two of you, allowing you to step inside first.

"I think it's just a cold." You entered gratefully, setting the bags down on the small, shared kitchen counter. You glanced back at Chad, who was looking over Ethan while keeping his distance as much as he could.

Ethan had become one with his blankets, rolled over against the wall. At least he was getting some rest.

"Here, let me help you with that," Chad offered, observing the way you struggled to find the correct places for each item.

You thanked him, setting aside a box of tissues and some medicine for Ethan once he woke up.

"So," Chad began and although you barely knew him, the teasing tone of his voice made you suspicious of what he would say next. "You and Ethan?"

You couldn't tell if it was a question or a statement or an invitation to let Chad in on something he was missing.

"We're just friends," you insisted despite the warmth of your cheeks and the smile fighting its way onto your face.

"Just friends don't look at each other like that."

You could've brought up the fact that Chad had barely even seen you and Ethan interact but you knew there was no point in arguing. A part of you didn't want to, anyways.

"Do you like him? Honestly?" You weren't sure which inflection gave it away; Chad cared for Ethan despite the distance in their relationship. Learning to live together had done them a favor, after all.

"I do," you confessed quietly, a part of you wondering why you'd done it to essentially a complete stranger.

Chad just smiled, a wide one that only solidified your earlier theory.

"I think he does too."

You shrugged despite yourself, the cycle of your memories occasionally bringing up the beginning of your relationship with Ethan Landry despite how much you'd grown from then.

"You should go," you began after a few moments of silence. "I can take care of him."

Chad complied easily, commenting that he had work to get done anyway. You suspected it was a lie.

There was movement from Ethan's bed and you moved towards its source, bottle of medicine and tissues in hand.

Ethan was suddenly awake now, pink cheeks grinning like he had just won the lottery.

"Are you that excited about tissues...?" You wondered out loud with a small, nervous laugh.

"Chad was right," Ethan blurted and terror struck you as you realized he heard.

"I do like you."

Emotions hit you one after the other, disbelief the most prominent of all.

"I thought you were asleep."

"I'm really glad I wasn't."

"Asshole."

"Hey, you can't be mean to me while I'm sick. I get a pass."

"Just wait until you're better," you threatened emptily.

Ethan's lips curved into a small pout, flushed face only serving to make him look cuter despite the circumstances.

"I really want to kiss you right now," he confessed unsteadily.

"Absolutely not. We have a test on Thursday and I'm not missing it," you retorted, Ethan's light laughter flooding your ears.

"That was my plan all along. Get you sick so I can finally redeem myself," Ethan joked but something in your eyes flickered and he worried he said the wrong thing.

"I'm sorry, I was kidding - "

Ethan's stammering was interrupted by the sweet sound of your laughter, relief spreading through his body.

You leaned down to press a kiss to Ethan's forehead. You quickly moved to press kisses to other empty spots of Ethan's face, no longer denying yourself the urge to pepper his face like you had so many times before.

You weren't sure how you wound up here, taking care of the boy you swore you'd hated, kissing him until he smiled despite the pain he was in. It was an accident, a series of events neither of you had predicted or expected. What began as a trade-off became an ordeal that had trapped both your hearts and refused to let go until the two of you complied.

The warmth of Ethan Landry had overcome you, though it was not too much to bear. It was just the right temperature to comfort you in the cold and shine in the summer. Ethan Landry was wide smiles and soft touches, not at all arrogant like you had initially assumed. He was the feeling of a shirt fresh out of the dryer, comforting you through every inch of your being.

That was just the beginning of what you knew about him. You weren't done exploring all of Ethan Landry and he wasn't done with you. Each misconception held had dissolved and become something else, an invitation to continue learning about each other. You weren't sure what this was or what it would become, but you took the lesson the world wanted to teach you and ran with its potential. If your happiness came because of Ethan Landry, who were you to refuse?

"I know," you whispered, placing a gentle kiss to Ethan's head. The first of many, you were sure.

And for the first time, the two of you understood each other perfectly.

Patience is the key to success (2)

Masterlist if you want to read my others things. Part 1 here.

CW/TW: yandere-manipulative-obsessive-stalker-ethan, fem reader, smut, no p in v, depressed reader(but really), suicidal thoughts

i'm trying to post this quick because I crave attention, whatever its insults, compliments, likes or repost, idc. I want ppl to know i'm existing. i have a big oral test tomorrow and im really bad at speaking before someone (hence why im writing instead) so i just need to know im not totally useless in the society and that im, at the very least, making people enjoy my things. sorry for the rant, i have a big headhache, probably gonna die ✌️😚

the smut is really bad btw but like really but im bad at writing them but i need to to improve (26/06/2023) (5226 words)

"Let's just finish watching the movie now." you say and Ethan doesn't make you repeat as he goes straight to the couch.

You felt much better after that little talk. Ethan did not say much but in his words, there was a lot more. He was planning to be with you a long time. He does not want to ruin things. It made you so happy. Every fiber in you was warm thinking of it. You were at peace.

Ethan was calm after that, albeit moving uncomfortably sometimes. (maybe because of his boner?) He was just as cuddly as when you arrived. His head laid flat on your chest, rising up and down with each one of your breath. Your fingers brush his curl slowly as you hear his breathing slacken. You were giddy thinking about him being at peace with you, too.

His arms were closed tightly around your body, never letting you go. The movie was really advanced by now, the end was coming soon. It probably was something towards 11AM. Usually, you would have gone knock at your friend's house but there was no need now as you already saw her earlier.

When the movie fatefully ended, the credits start to roll but none of you moved an inch. Ethan rubs his cheeks against your chest before sighing happily. His eyes were closed. Was he asleep ? No, certainly not. He loves horror movie. He wouldn't fall asleep when one is ongoing.

He was cute here. You were delighted to think he trusted you enough to let his guards down and sleep with you. You were his safeplace. And he was yours. Your fingers trail down on his back where you draw small patterns dreamily. You write things, that cross your mind. You simply scratch him. His sudden speaking startle you. Your hand stopping evey movements.

"Are you sleeping far from here, today ? Every movements of his jaw hitting slightly on your chest. 'today' because he knew about your frequent change of home.

Relaxing, you continue to caress his back lovingly.

-No, not really. But I don't sleep there anymore.

The hotel too was starting to worry you. Like the building was shrieking on you. You don't know what was scarier, to be alone or to never be. And now that you found such a warm place, you don't want to leave. Ever.

-Why ?

-Scare me, s'all.

-You can sleep here tonight, if you want.

-Why ? Your decision was already made; you'd sleep here. You knew it the second he offered you to stay the night. But you wanted to see his arguments to convince you.

"Let me be with you." his sentence made a shiver run down your back.

Did that stalker fucked you up so hard you had chill even thinking about them? It was just a damn sentence. Everyone can say it. For god's sake, it's Ethan saying it of all people. Even if he awoke this uneasy feeling back, you couldn't blame him. He didn't know about the sign the criminal had shown you. You didn't tell him that much detail, only saying they had indeed brought creepy signs but omitting what was written on it. And Ethan said it so prettily, too. Yes, of course you'd be with him.

He told you you never slept here before and that you'd be safe anyway since he's here and don't plan on leaving you. So you accepted. It was really early in the day but the both of you were getting sleepy because of the calm and comfort of the situation. He offered you to go to his room which you accepted. After guiding you to there, he tells you he has to go grab something and that he'd be back really quick.

And he did, in fact, came back really quick.

By then, you were already sprawled out on his bed. You had time to see the mess he had scattered everywhere. The carboard, the books, the drawings, some letters, too. And you even found out about his second phone. The lockscreen was a generic one, the one you have by default, as if he just got it recently. But the phone wasn't new, it seems in contrary really old as it was broken at some area.

Ethan arrives in the room with a small plastic blue square packaging, you don't have time to see what it was that he throws it under the bed. You don't pay it too much attention. Playing mindlessly with his other phone in hand, you take off and put back the phone case of it to entertain yourself.

"You got two phones ? you ask even though you kind of knew the answer already.

-Oh, yes. One is for games only, the other is the one I'm really using. Did you went on it ?

-No, don't worry, I won't frisk into your secret criminal life."

He smiles before taking the phone out of your hand. He places it in the drawer of his nightstand. Ethan falls on top of you, taking your breath away for a moment. You laugh and hit his back for him to get away from you and he just laugh heartly before letting himself fall beside you.

He lays down, setting his head on his arm, looking up at you with stars in eyes. Sometimes, he's so pretty it hurt physically to look at him. Starting to get embarrassed by his insistent look, you find something to say.

-Why do you have so much pieces of cardboard anyway ?

-I make placards out of them.

With a fond smile, Ethan stares straight at your eyes. As if waiting for you to say something. You would have ask questions about his 'placards ' if not for the sudden interest he was displaying in you, which, instead, made you change subject without really noticing it. A nervous laugh escaping you.

-Why are you looking at me like that ? Is there an undertone ? Am I supposed to understand something ?"

He shakes his head negatively, displaying a small mischievous smile. He could be such a goblin at times ! Wanting to make him swallow his pride, you lean towards him and kiss his lips. Ethan smiles and moves his lips with yours.

Your arm set down on his waist and soon the kiss get heated. Ethan's body is burning, his breath is too. You don't let each other breath, as soon as you separate from each other, you plunge back in. Physically needing the contact.

You rise on your knee, arching your back to kiss him still laying flat on the bed. Soon, he joins you by rising as well. Both of you on your knees, face to face, eating each other's face. Ethan's hand are mahandling you to sit on his thights. Then, with his surprising strenght, he starts sliding you on them. Your heating pussy rubbing directly on the fabric of his pant. Your hand instinctivly goes to rub the growing tent in his trousers. The area was hot, when you slide your fingers on it, it would budge.

Ethan whimpers, thrusting his hips against yours. You straddle him completly, framing his his body with your legs. You rub his tent against your clit for some frictions. It was aching and growing more desperate by seconds.

"I... I wanna have sex with you." Ethan says softly.

You kiss his cheek, going for his neck. You answer with a meek 'me too' before sucking the skin of his neck. Ethan backs his head, already out of breath. He gives you full access to his body, still rutting desperatly his hips into yours.

But you were growing impatient. You lift your body from him, making him whine at the contact loss, before sliding your fingers behind the elastic of his pants. You slip it down to his knees before you start salivating at the sight of his hard cock already drooling for you.

He didn't have any underwear. That's why you could feel him so close to your core.

Your hand touch his thight, caressing gently his body. Making sure to avoid the area he need you the most. Ethan try to touch himself, tired of your teasing, but you slap his hand away. He whines and looks up at you with teary eyes. Silently begging you to do something. It was impossible for you to resist him.

Your hand grabs his cock in one motion, you could feel it pulse and its warmth propagate in your hand. It was already so so wet because of all his precum, your hand was sliding so easily you could have thought he came multiple times already. Gently, you start to move your hand on all its lenght slowly. The boy props himself on his elbows and look at the scene before him. Ethan sighs happily, eyes closing and head backing. He's in heaven, he thinks. But not entirely, as he looks at you still clothed.

"Want to... Want to finger you..." he pleas.

In front of a boy so desperate, and being incredibly horny, you slide your pant down, making sure your underwear went with it. Ethan lose every one of his braincells when he sees your bare pussy glistening with your love juice. He wanted to lick it bad. That's the only one fanstam he ever had that help him getting off so hard he can't move for a whole minute. He wants to drown himself in your juice. But you have others projects.

You guide his pointer finger to your lips. Ethan starts caressing it and smear your juice everywhere. His lift up another finger and start passing both of them on your lips.

"Here, you have to touch here." you say, pointing to your clit.

You move briefly to bring your genitals closer. You could feel each other's warmth emanating from your core. Seeing him try to touch you was so hot. He was listening to everything you said.

Soon getting the hang of it, he starts circling your clit, applying different pressure on it to see which one were you reacting the most to. Slowly, you quicken your pace on his hard cock. As if to reward him for being such a good boy. He was in a trance, eyes closing and opening. And when they opened, they were staring with a utmost care at your moving breast throught your shirt. Your nipples were hard and were poking through the fabric.

His eyes were glued to it. Understanding his want, you lift your shirt above your collarbone with your free hand. Ethan can't seem to take off his eyes of you. They're probably the first pair of breasts he sees in real life after all.

"Fuck... You're so pretty, love." you speed up on his shaft at his praise. "Fuck, fuck...

-You can touch baby.

-I can?"

He stops all movements to your pussy, your frown but let him discover his needs. It was his first time, you needed to let him have a little fun. His free hand touch one of your breast, massaging it then weighten it in the palm of his hand. He smiles like an idiot, an idiot so cute you let him do what he wants with you. His other, wet, hand pinch lightly your sensitive bud.

Your free hand slap his arm to make him understand he did it too hard. He sends you an apologatic smile.

"They're like stress ball."

Amused by the weird comparison, your chuckle. Still impatient to come, you guide your hand higher on his cock to caress his tip and rub it. His face contorts in pleasure, browns frows and mouth ajar. His forehead fall on your shoulder while his fingers go back down near your entrance. His hips were thrusting into nothing but your hand. Obscene wet noises were resulted. You were hot, terrribly hot but so was he.

Ethan's small puff of breath sends chill in your body. His whimpers couldn't be replaced with anyone else. Your hand was all wet and sticky, as was his. Ethan decides to enter once again two of his digits in you. Your head falls back and you sigh happily at finally scratching that itch in you.

"Curl your fingers, E." you whisper.

He hums and do as told. Curling his fingers in you, he starts to thrust them in and out at a slow pace, adopting the same sensuality you used to jerk him off. You accelerate, your hand no longer lingering on the entire shaft. Sometimes, you'd stop completly to hear him whine. Your thumb caressing his cock's veins.

"Baby please..." he pleas.

Ethan starts kissing sloppily your shoulder, your neck. You, on the other hand, take his hand to guide the thrust of his fingers, angling them correctly for them to touch that spongy spot inside. His fingers were long and thin, that was a part of him you absolutly loved. You always had a thing for pretty hands and his were beautiful.

"What do you want, love? you ask tenderly.

-Tell me you love me..."

You nudge his hair with your nose and he looks up. Staring at his eyes, you see them wet with tears. You kiss him instantly. Playing with his tongue with yours, your hand moving faster and faster. You stop the kiss to tell him you love him and he bites his lips, eyes closing.

His breath is jerky, uneven. You press his palm against your clit, rubbing it while you push his fingers inside you again. You feel a knot tighten. You won't last long.

"Tell me you love me.

-I love you E, you're doing so good.

-Again..."

You said it as many times as he needed to feel better. His hips stuttters, his cock quivers. His words are slurred to each other, resulting in incomprehensible blabbering. You don't lose the rythm, keeping the same pace until he'd eventually come.

-Love you so..." he whines.

His body tense, his breath stops. You can only hear the wet sounds your hand is producing. He doesn't utter a sound until spurts of cum smear on your hand and belly. Feeling at ease, he moans a last time from relief and breath again.

You're not far behind. Ethan being pratically knocked out, you grind on his hand. You close your thighs around it, ensuring it stay inside. Your legs are shaking, wave of hot and cold invade you. You plunge his fingers inside but, to your surprise, Ethan regains control and start pounding into you to get you to your end.

He kisses your neck while you finally come on his fingers, sweaty and disvesheled. You swear one last time when he withdraws his fingers. You stay here for a while, just hugging , breathing and basking in each other's presence.

After some minutes, you decide to go shower together. You end up finally getting a good night of sleep, cuddled in his strong arms.

The next day, Ethan and you had a stupid satisfied smile on your face. Both happy to be here. You kissed and confessed your love to each other all morning until eventually he had to leave for work. Sadly, you had things to do, too. Ethan offered you to stay and sleep here for a few nights because he wanted to stay close to you.

You liked this idea. Of course you liked it, you love Ethan. And to convince you further, he told you his roomate wouldn't mind. So naturally you accepted. You were embarassed at the idea of bothering his roomate but you decided you would just sleep here, and the day, you'd let the apartment free. It was his too, after all. Not only Ethan's. There is no way you'd let someone feel excluded in their own house.

Grabbing your phone, you click on your friend's number. You call her, the ringing echoes three times and no one answer. Somehow begrudgingly, you resume yourself at simply sending a text. Just for you to instantly forgetting your sorrow as she answers. The discussion was quite simple, she was telling you she was at her grandma right now. She was bored and wanted to know how you were doing.

'I'm going back to my dear haunted apartment, probably gonna die. Wish me luck.' you texted. She put a little more time answering this one. It's possible it triggered something in her. After everything she endured. 'nobody will hurt you as long as i'm alive' she said. She simply changed subjects after that. Asking you about the cute guy you told her about in the letters. And so you explained everything. Every time you tried to offer to call her, she'd decline. You were still sad she didn't want to talk to you but you were telling yourself you needed to be patient.

On a happier note, you decided to leave the place to go to your own apartment.

To one point, you should have known better than be too happy about your improving situation. Of course, it was well too soon for you to consider everything better. But you were probably stupid because the fall hit you much harder than you could've prepared yourself for. Oh, the pain you felt when reality had finally caught you. You thought you were going to die when you came back home to simply grab some clothes. (Ethan told you to do so.)

Your door was ajar. But it wasn't your doing. No, of course it wasn't you. Your apartement terrified you, why would you come here more ofthen than needed ? You felt your body freeze but you quickly overcame the feeling. That's it. You needed it to end. This fucking stalker had ruined you. You and your life. You sent a text to Ethan, telling him that if you do not call him after twenty minutes, he needed to call the cops. He didn't answer. He was at work. It was well past eleven by now.

Your heart was beating so hard you thought it was going to collapse on the ground, and you with it. Slowly, aware of every sound around you, you push the door. Your livingroom was as messy as you had left it. At one difference, the wall. Every frame you had put up on the walls were thrown away. Most of them on the ground and broken, with shattered glasses everywhere.

Why would the creep empty the walls ? To write on it. Of course they would write on it. You laugh bitterly for yourself. You couldn't see their stupids fucking signs anymore, so they had to improve. To force you to read their creepy obsessive text. You hear the crushing of a broken piece of glass, as if someone had stepped on it. But it wasn't you.

You're on alert. Every one of your senses on crisis. Was your mind playing tricks on you ? It was possible in this hellish house who did nothing but give you nightmares recently. You don't realize how you stopped breathing. Only calming when three long minutes had gone without another sound to be heard.

Nothing is here. You're alone, you think. Everything is good. You'll just grab your stuff and leave. Regaining your breath, you bring your attention back on the wall. Words were written on it in deep crimson red. Is that blood ? No, it can't be. Probably paint to give a creepy look that'll catch your attention. You approach the wall to better understand the message.

'She's not here anymore'

The need to throw up almost won. A dark feeling in your guts was telling you 'she' was your friend. But you didn't know. She responded to you, after all. You talked to her. So she had to be okay. She had to. You put your hand on your belly to soothe that want to vomit. You take big breath before finally leaving the livingroom. You quickly make your way to your room where you meet your bare bed. Where are your sheets ? What the hell ? But you don't want to stay longer so you throw clothes in your bag in a hurry.

The front door slam shut. And you know it's the end.

You already feel the tears drowning your sight. Trying to stay silent, you hide in your closet almost empty with how many times you came here to grab clothes. Your hand clasp against your mouth to avoid doing any noise.

Slow footsteps can be heard in the empty apartment. With your shaky hands, you fail to unlock your phone. Your vision is blurry, you can't touch the correct keys. The worst is that you can't see where the creep is. If they stay silent, they can enter the room you're in without you even noticing. And this idea is horrifying. But on another side, you'd preferred them to kill you by surprise so you don't have to affront them.

Your cries intensify, in your despair, you drop your phone straight on the ground. The footsteps stops abrutly. Three distincts knocks are echoing on the corridor's wall. They are coming toward you. You're fucked. They're coming ! What do you do ? What did you do ? Why is this happening ?

Kneeling like you could in the closed space, you reach your hand to grab your phone. As soon as your finger grazes it, the phone vibrate and your ringtone start playing for the whole building to hear. No, no, no, no, no ! Ethan. Ethan is calling you. You pick up despite everything but as soon as you do so, the call is cut short. Fuck E, why would you do that !

The criminal's footsteps are louder, quicker, heavier. They're running. They're running here ! You hold the closet door shut with your both hands, praying for your life. You only have knives in your kitchen, but it's too late now. If you go out, they'll see you. You realized at that moment that whatever you were doing, you couldn't win. That you never even stood a chance against them.

Everything was illusion.

Nothing was improving, you knew it, in fact. You were lying to yourself, searching comfort in a man that don't even understand the dept of the problem. Of your problem. And your friend ? You don't want to talk about her. You don't want to open your eyes just yet. You just want to live in your nice little lies you made up for yourself. You're nice with them, in fact, you like them. Nobody wanted to help you anyway. They could have saved you, you and her, but nobody listened.

Now, it's too late.

The closet start to shake. Widening your eyes, you realize that the creep had start to punch it with their bare fist. You don't give a fuck about being heard anymore, you're bailing your eyes out. Begging for them to let you go, screaming, yelling, calling for help. Holding the door for dear life as if it was going to save you, because in your head it was. But the door didn't last long.

A hole is quickly created in the door. You thought you'd see someone's face, wether it be a man, a woman, whatever. But you saw a white plastic mask instead.

Ghostface.

Why was a damn Ghostface chasing after you? Was it all a sick joke from the start ? You swear you were seeing his eyes boring into yours through the mask. You swore you already saw them somewhere. Ghostface tilts their face to the side, as if mocking you. They were telling you that you were stuck, that it was the end. You hoped they'd kill you.

You couldn't live like this anymore.

In the hole of the closet, Ghostface pass his gloved hand. The latter lay on your shaky face, on your cheek to be exact. You feel the fabric against your skin and think of biting his fingers off. No, you'll angry him. If he's going to kill you, that it be in the least painful way.

"Ethan, right ? Does he treat you so well you forgot about me?" his changed voice said. A weird and creepy robotic voice, one you knew you'd never forget.

You were moving your head left to right. You didn't know why. Probably to tell you didn't want to die, probably to avoid looking into his eyes. He laughs, sounding like a rumbling.

"Ending things right now would be such a waste."

No ! You thought you were finally free ! Why would he chases you down for so long without acting on it !? His gloved hand retract and the door slowly open in an acute creaking. The man is finally revealed before you. He was wearing the whole outfit, the big black robe and the hood.

"It was fun. I give you a gift to reward you for these beautiful screams."

And the knife.

He had a knife in hand. And it was tinged red. Something in you told you it was her. Suddenly, the red writings on your wall had a different meaning.

"I hope you like it, I worked extra hard for it."

Out of nowhere, Ghostface takes your hand, force it open, and lay in it something before forcing it closed. He laughs deeply. One of his hand pat your head mockingly before moving up.

"See you later." he said, swinging his knife in a playful manner.

You were absolutely paralyzed. You didn't know what happened. You stayed up without moving for whoever say how long. When your legs finally stopped shaking, you decided to look what the killer had gave you. Slowly opening your hand, your knee buckle and you fall to the ground crying silently at the sight of a nip of your friend's hair.

You curled up on yourself before completly laying down on the ground, tightening the hairs in your hand close to your heart. She was not here anymore. You wanted to fucking die.

Ever since, Ethan was forgotten. He had tried to call you so many times you had blocked his number. You spent the rest of the day crying in your hotel's room. You resented him. So hard. He didn't answer, he was the one calling and giving your position to a fucking criminal, to a murderer! And he didn't answer. He didn't help, like everyone else.

One day later, neighbors complained about a smell coming from an apartment. You didn't cry when they found your friend's dead body. You didn't cry when cops came to interrogate you. The caretaker having told them about you. Your eyes contained so much hatred in them when looking at him the cops had to let him leave to get him away from you. You didn't cry telling the cops how many times you went to see them to ask for help, nor how many times did they reject you. You didn't cry when they told you she was dead for at least a week, and that her boyfriend was missing. You had no tears left in you. It had simply ended you.

All your lies, every single one of them, destroyed. But you needed them. Of course you weren't talking to her by text, you never did. And fuck, you don't even want to know who was answering instead of her. It was so obvious how she never wanted to call, how she was never leaving her house. But the eye you saw at the peephole. The fucking eye...

You don't want to think about it.

Ethan tried to talk to you. He went to your hotel and found you. You didn't bother to move this time as you were done with your life. He fell to his knee and started begging and crying for your forgivness. Did you even love him ? Or were you, are you, just lonely ? Unfortunately, you decided to forgot the anger you had against him when you realized he was the only thing you had. Your only support. The only one knowing you were a victim. You spent the days crying in his arms.

"Shhh, shhh, I'm here, love. It's okay." he reassured you, again.

It was a routine, now. You'd sleep the days away and when you'd wake up, you'd find yourself crying inconsolably. Everything was your fault, you kept repeating in your head. She's fucking dead because of you.

You wanted to end it all but Ethan wanted you alive at every cost. He was brushing your hair, feeding, washing and changing you. You were a lifeless doll. Sometimes, his roomate would come and talk to you. Most of the times, you don't even realize he's talking to you, too lost in your thought to proceed his presence.

"It's okay, everything's okay."

Ethan hugs you firmly. Kissing your hairline. His t-shirt was damped. Your eyes were burning. Every time you closed them, the picture of your friend would come and haunt you, a new nightmare coming. You weren't able to think about something else anymore. But it was your fault. You put her in danger, you got her killed. It was you Ghostface wanted, not her. You got her killed.

"I want to leave..." you whispered in a voice so hoarse, so weak, it didn't sound like yours. His hand goes on the back of your head to pull you towards him.

"No, no my love. It's okay. I'll protect you. You won't be alone anymore." his leg goes over yours and crushes them to prevents you from moving.

Alone.

Have you ever been alone in your life ? No, he was here all along. He was watching you all along. You never were truly alone. He had your adress, your friend's adress, your number and even Ethan's name. No, he's always here. Lurking.

"Just... Stay with me, I'll protect you. Please, don't leave me." he begs.

He looked calm, surprisingly calm being given the situation. But you needed it, in a way. If he doesn't freak out, you don't need to. (you coudn't, even if you wanted to) He probably know what to do. It was too late for you but he could do something. Maybe. His behaviour was slightly comforting. It was dangerous, mostly for him. He probably didn't even know what he was doing, he probably didn't know what he was getting himself into, in fact.

But once, just for once, you wanted to be helped. You wanted someone to listen to your pleas. He was going to die, it was a fact. And yeah, maybe you were selfish, you were condamning him after all.

"I feel like I'm using you. Like I manipulated you. you say, mostly for your own conscience than for his safety.

-Use me, love. I don't care. Manipulate me, whatever. I swore I'd help you. And if I have to risk my life doing it, I'll do it. I love you. You don't know the things I'd do for you.

-Now, you're the one manipulating me...

It was true. He was forcing you to think you had a chance in getting out of this situation when you knew there were none.

-Oh baby, you have no idea how manipulative I can be to obtain what I want.

-If you say so." you whisper, drifting to sleep once again, knowing you'd wake up hours later in the same position, in the same problem and knowing you killed your friend.

Baby, I'm Home

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader

Summary: You wrap yourself up as an early Christmas present for your boyfriend Eddie to surprise him as he gets home from work.

Word Count: 2.5K

Content Warnings: 18+ Only, Smut, Shower sex, Fingering, Oral m receiveing

You frowned in front of the mirror as you fumbled with the flimsy material of your lingerie, if you could even call it that. The ensemble was definitely for novelty purposes, and you suspected you wouldn’t be wearing it for long anyway but you were still uncomfortable nonetheless. It was Christmas Eve and you were waiting for your boyfriend to get home from work, it was the first one in your small shared apartment and Eddie had been working overtime for months to help pay for everything you needed to make your new home feel like home. You had told him he had no need to work so hard, to you, home was wherever he was. You didn’t need anything but him, but he was hearing none of it. He wanted you to have the fancy bedsheets you ran your fingers over last time you were shopping, he wanted you to have the expensive coffee that made you close your eyes in content every morning, he wanted you to be able to buy all the plants and candles and little trinkets you wanted no matter how many times you told him they weren’t necessaties. 

Your Christmas Eve had always been special ever since you were a child, always spent with family preparing for the festivities, huddled up with over indulgent hot chocolates and home baked goods and a long list of cheesy holiday movies. So when Eddie broke the news that he agreed to work the late shift you were more than disappointed, but you couldn’t help the way your heart swelled when you knew he was doing it for you. So you decided to do something for him in return, an early Christmas present. Your body being the present, and he was allowed to use it however he pleased. Your chest was wrapped up by probably the least supportive “bra” you’d ever owned, the huge ruby red bow barely containing your breasts. Ruffled panties of the same shade covered your nether region, held up by the silky ribbons tied on either side of your hips. 

You were expecting him home at any moment, after adjusting your bow one last time until you were satisfied with the way it rested you shuffled your way to the living area. Pouring out two glasses of wine you placed them in the centre of the coffee table before lighting a few candles to set the atmosphere you were going for. You knelt down on the rug facing the front door and waited, your thighs parted slightly, hands clasped together between them while you squeezed your arms to accentuate your breasts. You started to feel fidgety when you finally heard the jangle of his keys in the lock. Your stomach somersaulted as the door swung open, your beautiful boyfriend coming into view, his palm dragging down the front of his tired face as he sluggishly crossed over the threshold. 

“Baby I’m ho- ohhh my god,” he faltered, his keys slipping from his fingers and clattering to the wooden floorboards. “What- what is this?” 

You beamed up at him, not used to seeing him at a loss for words. 

“Merry Christmas baby,” you purred, lips pouting seductively. 

He stalked closer to you, his lip tucked between his teeth as his dark eyes roamed over you. He stopped in front of you and smirked, you gazed up at him with big round eyes, purposefully wide to try and make yourself look as innocent as possible. He reached out to grip your chin, the calloused pad of his thumb rubbing back and forth soothingly. He hummed and moved his thumb to your plump bottom lip, pulling down the flesh before demanding you to open your mouth. You did as instructed and opened, moaning as he slid his thumb in along your tongue. You closed your lips around the digit and sucked before biting down gently. 

“Naughty,” he scolded, retracting his thumb and smearing your saliva across your cheek as he cupped your face in his palm. 

He dropped to his knees to match your height and surged forward to capture your lips in a dizzying kiss. Your hands gripped his wrists where they held your head to steady yourself, you whined he sank his own teeth into your bottom lip and tugged. 

“Are you my present sweetheart?” Eddie asked, one hand toying with the ribbon. 

“Mmhmm,” you nodded in affirmation. “You can have me any way you want.”

Eddie got to his feet and took a few steps back, wanting to savour the sight of you a moment longer before he unwrapped you. When he had your every curve committed to memory he reached out his arms to you encouraging you to stand. You grabbed his hands and stumbled when he hoisted you up, your legs numb from being knelt for so long. He grabbed your hips to stop you from toppling over and searched out your lips once more. Open mouthed kisses dragged along your jaw and down your neck, latching onto your pulse point Eddie sucked an array of purple bruises along your throat and across your collarbones. 

Once the feeling had returned to your legs and he was sure you wouldn’t fall down his fingers traced soft lines up your waist and along your ribs, pausing as he reached the edges of the ribbon. He yanked the material harshly, eyes wide in awe as he watched the bow unravel and drop to the floor. You gasped as he wasted no time taking your nipple in his mouth, his hand palming the one which wasn’t getting attention from his tongue. He licked his way down your stomach to your hips, kissing his way across the waistband of your panties he simultaneously pulled at the bows holding them in place. 

You squirmed at the feeling of him pulling the silk from between your thighs, his kisses immediately travelling lower until his tongue darts out to swipe at your clit. Your fingers tangled in his curls as you leaned forward into his touch. He chuckled into your heat at how hard you were pulling his hair. He pried your fingers away from his head and rose to your height, tenderly pressing his forehead against our own. 

“Care to join me in the shower my love?” He was tired and aching from his long shift, wanting nothing more than to ravish you right there in the middle of the rug but also wanting to wash the sweat and grime from his body. 

You agreed and walked him backwards in the direction of the bathroom, tiny pecks of affection against each other's lips as you led the way. You helped strip him of his clothes and climbed into the shower behind him. Your earlier antics were halted as you helped wash away the tension he was holding in his muscles. 

Your nails gently raked against his scalp as you massaged the shampoo into his hair, a satisfied groan rumbling in his throat. With delicate fingers you cover his skin with body wash, the shower head drummed against Eddie’s bowed head, his palms resting against the cool tiles in front of him. Stood behind him you placed loving kisses between his shoulder blades and down his spine, your hands snaking around his front to run along his chest and down his stomach, teasing along his happy trail. You felt the back of your hand brush against his erection, wrapping your fist around him you gave his swelling dick a squeeze at the base. He lets out a soft moan at the contact, the sensation sending a tingle down his spine. Eddie grinded his forehead to the tiles as your hand stroked him at a slow steady pace, every nerve in his body lit up at your touch, your teeth scraping at his shoulder. 

“Gonna make me cum,” Eddie whined breathlessly and you smiled into his skin as he rocked his hips in time with your fist. 

“Good baby,” you assured him. “Tonight’s all about you.”

“Nuh uh, not yet,” he gripped your wrist stilling your motions and rotated to face you, his pupils blown wide. 

He cupped your neck and waist and pulled you forward to his chest, desperate to taste every inch of your tongue. He reached down to run his fingers through your slickness, enjoying the way you writhed against his touch. You moaned as he wedged his thigh between your legs forcing you to open wider, two fingers breaching your entrance and curling perfectly inside you. He growled as your nails sunk into his shoulders, he hooked his free hand beneath your knee hiking your leg up high on his hip. 

The air around you felt too hot, the steam from the shower combined with the ferocity he was pumping his fingers in and out of you was making you feel light headed, his tongue still caressed your own as you whimpered into his mouth. Your brow furrowed as you felt him smirk against your lips, his eyes darkening even more as he had a sudden idea. He pulled his fingers out of your cunt, firmly dragging them upwards over your clit and once again gripping your hip. He breathed heavily against your lips when he broke the kiss, the lust coursing through his veins making his brain feel cloudy. 

“Fucking Christ,” he sighed, the hand on your hip reaching up to unhook the shower head from its catch. “You make the prettiest little noises all for me don’t you?” 

“Uh huh,” you fussed, your stomach flipping excitedly as you watched him twist the head to set it to a harsher spray. “For you Eds, all for you.” 

He smiled at you wickedly as he brought the shower head between your trembling thighs, hoisting your knee back up over his hip to keep your centre exposed. You threw your head back when the water ran over your folds, the pressure of the spray making your toes curl and your knees threaten to buckle. 

“Careful angel,” he whispered as he heard the thud of your skull make contact with the tiles. 

“Oh my god,” you sobbed, your nails biting into his skin hard enough to leave crescent shaped indents as you fought to keep yourself upright. “Oh my god Eddie, oh fuck, fuck, fuck.” 

“Mmmm, that’s it pretty girl, let it all out,” he cooed softly into your ear as he nipped your lobe between his teeth. 

Your hips started to buck involuntarily as your orgasm drew closer. Your brows knitted together and your lips open to form a cute little oh shape. Eddie wished he could snap a picture of the moment, he always thought you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever laid eyes on but right now you looked like a fucking goddess. The coil in your stomach wound tighter and tighter until it finally snapped, you flung your arms around his neck to keep yourself from falling over, the force of your release knocking the air from your lungs. He pressed gentle kisses to your temple as you came back down to Earth, hooking the shower head back in its place in the wall he wrapped his now free arm around your waist to hold you tightly to his chest. Slowly lowering your leg he rubbed soothing circles against your hip bone with his thumb. 

You could feel his cock rock hard and stood to full attention pressing into your stomach as he held you, a fresh wave of heat flooded your body despite your still trembling limbs, when it came to him you could never get enough. You pulled away from him tapping gently at his chest. 

“All good?” he asked a little breathless, his heart racing from how turned on he was. 

“Yeah,” you nodded. “Yeah, holy shit that was amazing.” 

He chuckled looking proud of himself, the grin falling from his face when you grabbed him by the hips and switched your positions, hissing as his back made contact with the cold tiles. You sank to your knees in front of him, nipping a path from his pulse point down his chest and stomach, your tongue soothing the sting left by your teeth. He whined as you licked a line from the base of his shaft to the swollen leaking tip, lapping up the bead of precum pooling at his slit. You were too impatient to tease him, wasting no time taking him fully in your mouth. The growl that ripped from his throat was primal as the warm, wet heat engulfed him, you bobbed your head hungrily swallowing the urge to gag as you took him deeper and deeper. 

You expected him to tangle his fingers in your hair as he usually did to guide your pace but instead he placed his hands on either side of your face. His thumbs brushing the soft skin of your cheeks tenderly as he tilted your face up to look down into your eyes. He shuddered as your gazes locked, the butterflies in his stomach flapping their wings wildly. You reached your hands around to grab onto his ass, raking your fingernails over the soft flesh and down the backs of his thighs. The sensation causing his hips to jerk forward, you gagged softly as he hit the back of your throat. 

“Sorry, m’sorry baby,” he croaked through a strangled voice as he continued to soothe your cheek with his thumb. 

You huffed a laugh through your nose and pushed yourself further forward again, your face almost buried in the wiry hair surrounding his cock. He was close you could tell by the divine little whimpers falling from his lips, you watched the muscles of his stomach clenching as his hip movements became jerky and uneven. He was done for the moment you reached up to lightly cup his balls, rolling them in your palm as his orgasm rushed to the surface. 

“M’gonna cum, oh- baby m’gonna cum,” he choked out hurriedly, warning you in case you wanted to pull away. 

Not a chance you thought as you braced yourself. Hot ropes of his salty pearlescent release coated your tongue, you concentrated on your breathing so you wouldn’t choke before swallowing every drop of him. You hummed dreamily as you released him from your lips. He slid down the wall so that he was kneeling next to you, his hands never leaving the sides of your face. He pulled you towards him to crash his lips to yours, the possessive part of him loving that he could taste himself on your tongue. Your breaths mingled when you broke apart for air, both panting heavily as he brushed the bridge of his nose against your own and laughed from the giddiness his high had brought. 

“Merry fucking Christmas to me.”

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I'm speechless, the talent is immaculate

love in the margins | t. iida

a short, slow-burn library romance, ft. one blueberry muffin, exactly zero jokes, and a boy who takes flashcards way too seriously. (4597 words)

you meet tenya iida under circumstances that can only be described as tragically collegiate: a peer-led study group in the furthest, quietest corner of the campus library, surrounded by half-dead fluorescent bulbs and the palpable despair of students on the brink of burnout.

it's the third week of the semester, and you're already floundering.

you hadn't intended to be. in theory, you were going to stay on top of things—read the chapters early, color-code your notes, maybe even start a study group of your own. but somewhere between sleep deprivation, an avalanche of discussion posts, and the mysterious black hole that is the university's online portal, you fell behind. hard.

introduction to public policy has been your academic nemesis from the start. the textbook reads like legal jargon swallowed a thesaurus. the professor talks in dense, circular metaphors. every quiz is a minefield of trick questions and ambiguous phrasing. you are, in every sense of the word, academically drowning.

so when a brightly colored flyer promising a "collaborative review session" caught your eye on the bulletin board outside the lecture hall, you didn't think twice. you showed up. desperate. caffeinated. terminally underprepared.

and now you regret everything.

the room smells like dry-erase markers and nervous sweat. a whiteboard at the front is covered in illegible graphs. someone has already spilled a latte on the floor. the guy leading the group talks fast and loud, his explanations full of buzzwords and gestures but lacking anything remotely useful. you suspect he's just regurgitating the study guide at a slightly faster pace.

the other students seem to agree.

one by one, they start to trickle out. a girl leaves with the excuse of "office hours." a guy mutters something about dinner. another just quietly packs up and disappears, not even bothering with a pretense.

by the end of the hour, only two people remain: you, clinging to a futile hope of salvaging your gpa... and him.

he sits across from you with the kind of posture that makes your back ache just looking at him. tall, composed, and absurdly polished—like someone who writes essays three days early and carries a spare pen in case someone forgets theirs. his navy-blue sweater is wrinkle-free. his glasses catch the dim library light. his notes are not just color-coded—they're thematically organized, annotated with footnotes and marginalia in tiny, immaculate handwriting.

he hasn't spoken once. he hasn't needed to.

he radiates competence like it's a moral obligation.

"you're still here?" you ask, more surprise than judgment.

the boy looks up, blinking as if surfacing from a well of deep concentration. he adjusts his glasses with a practiced motion.

"yes," he says, voice clipped and oddly formal. "you are as well."

you arch an eyebrow. "no offense, but... are you actually getting something out of this?"

his expression doesn't change, but he tilts his head slightly—almost like he's assessing you.

"of course," he replies. "engaging in structured group review enhances cognitive retention and contextual understanding. it's an effective method for consolidating knowledge prior to a high-stakes assessment."

you blink. "so... yes?"

he doesn't hesitate. "yes."

you snort—audibly. it escapes before you can stop it. and to your surprise, a faint smile flickers across his mouth.

"i'm tenya iida," he says, extending a hand across the table with the kind of precision reserved for formal introductions at university mixers.

you stare at his hand for a moment, then take it. his grip is warm. steady. confident in a way that makes you sit up a little straighter.

"y/n," you say.

his smile grows just slightly. "it's a pleasure to meet you, y/n."

he releases your hand and immediately pulls out a second set of flashcards from his folder. of course he has a second set.

"would you like to quiz each other?" he asks, dead serious. "alternating questions could be a mutually beneficial method of review."

you stare at him.

he stares back.

something about him—the earnestness, the posture, the complete and utter lack of sarcasm—disarms you. it's like he's the living embodiment of academic sincerity. you're not sure whether to laugh or agree.

you do both.

"...sure."

you don't know it yet, but that's the beginning.

⋆˚✿˖°

you don't plan on seeing him again.

it's not personal. it's just that study groups are the social equivalent of jury duty—temporary, miserable, and best forgotten. you assume tenya iida is one of those hyper-dedicated overachievers who only exist within the academic ecosystem. he probably recedes into a cloud of flashcards and moral fiber as soon as the library closes.

you are, however, proven categorically wrong the following wednesday at exactly 8:03 a.m.

you enter the campus café half-awake, mildly hostile, and fully dependent on the idea of caffeine as a substitute for sleep. the plan is simple: grab something with enough espresso to make your eye twitch, stare blankly at your phone for fifteen minutes, and pretend the crushing weight of institutional learning isn't slowly hollowing you out from the inside.

but fate—or perhaps syllabus-based divine intervention—has other plans.

because when you step inside, there he is.

same posture. same glasses. same stupidly crisp button-down like it didn't just come out of someone's laundry but graduated magna cum laude from it. he's seated at a table by the window, surrounded by highlighters arranged like soldiers, reading the textbook that has been your personal tormentor since week one.

and next to his coffee?

a single blueberry muffin.

you hesitate, caught in that weird space where it's too late to pretend you didn't see him, but also too awkward to walk past without acknowledging him.

before you can make a decision, he looks up—and smiles.

not just a polite, "ah yes, i recognize you" smile.

a real smile. brief, but sincere. like he's actually glad you're here.

he waves you over.

you hate how quickly your legs respond.

"didn't expect to see you here," you say as you slide into the seat across from him, instantly aware of how tired you look in comparison to his perfectly combed hair and terrifying punctuality.

"i study here most mornings," he replies. "the ambient noise level is consistent, and the natural lighting is optimal for focus."

you blink. "that is... alarmingly specific."

he inclines his head. "i find that consistency breeds productivity."

you want to tease him, but the truth is, it's kind of admirable. alarming. but admirable.

he gestures to the pastry between you.

"would you like half?" he asks. "it's fresh. and i believe we have, at this point, established a cordial enough rapport to justify the sharing of breakfast items."

you stare at him.

"do you always offer muffins to people you've only studied with once?"

he doesn't even flinch. "only when they look tired enough to deserve one."

your mouth twitches.

"you've been saving that line, haven't you."

he looks mildly offended. "no. though i could annotate it in my planner if you'd like."

you laugh—genuinely this time—and accept the muffin. it's warm, sweet, and annoyingly perfect. just like him.

you don't pull out your flashcards. not immediately. you sit there in companionable silence, splitting the muffin and sipping your drinks like it's something you've always done. like this is normal.

you tell yourself this isn't a date. obviously.

it's too early in the day for romance. you're both clutching textbooks like weapons. he hasn't even made a single joke. (you're not sure he knows how.)

and yet—

when he leans in to show you a section he highlighted—carefully annotated with footnotes and marginal notes that are somehow neater than your typed essays—your shoulders brush. you don't pull away.

he doesn't, either.

later, you realize that you don't even remember what chapter you reviewed.

but you remember the sound of his voice as he quietly explained it. the way he passed you the last bite of muffin without saying anything. the way his fingers curled ever so slightly when he set his pen down between you.

you remember thinking, with a strange flutter in your chest: this could be something.

not yet.

but maybe.

⋆˚✿˖°

you tell yourself this is still just about school.

you repeat it like a mantra as you meet him at the library every tuesday and thursday without fail, settling into your now-permanent seats by the windows like assigned partners in some ongoing group project that no one else remembers being assigned to. his bag always lands on the table first, followed by a reusable water bottle the size of your emotional baggage. he brings extra highlighters now—plural—and starts leaving a green one near your elbow like he’s not even thinking about it.

you, in turn, stop pretending to study anywhere else.

because the truth is, you don’t concentrate better when he’s around—not even a little. he’s distracting in the worst possible way: tall and tidy and terminally composed, with a voice like a podcast host and a smile that you pretend not to notice every time he glances over at you with something like pride in his eyes.

and the worst part?

it’s working.

your grades are going up. you understand policy terminology now. you caught yourself referencing a case study unprompted in another class, and the look your professor gave you made it feel like you’d just been knighted.

you’d thank him for it—sincerely—if he didn’t look so smug every time you nailed a quiz.

“you’ve clearly been applying yourself,” he says one evening, looking over your annotated notes like they’re some kind of sacred text.

“i’ve been applying your study methods,” you reply, then instantly regret it, because the smile he gives you in return is devastating.

and that would be fine—annoying, but fine—if it weren’t for the fact that he’s started sitting closer.

not drastically. not inappropriately. just... close.

close enough that when you both lean in to look at something on the same page, your shoulders brush. your knees knock. his hand lingers near yours when he passes you a pen, and he doesn’t move away quickly. sometimes—and this is particularly evil—his thigh rests against yours under the table for minutes at a time, and you’re too proud (and too panicked) to say anything.

you’re not flirting. not really.

you’re both too stubborn for that.

but something is happening. you just don’t know what to call it.

one thursday afternoon, the sky is gray and heavy with the threat of rain. the windows in the library fog up slightly, making the whole room feel smaller, softer, somehow more intimate. your shoes are damp. your brain is fried. you’re barely holding onto your focus.

but he’s already there, sitting at your usual table with a mug from the downstairs café and a folder labeled “legislation review: week 5.” there’s a muffin. of course there’s a muffin.

he looks up as you approach. smiles. “you’re early.”

you blink. “so are you.”

he shrugs. “anticipation is efficient.”

“what does that even mean?”

he hesitates, like he’s genuinely considering it. “it means i enjoy this.”

your heart does something stupid.

you take your seat before your face can give you away.

thirty minutes in, your brain stops processing information entirely.

you’re trying to focus. really, you are. but his leg is pressed against yours and you swear it’s getting closer every time he shifts. it’s not even the contact itself that’s distracting—it’s the fact that he doesn’t seem to notice. like it’s just normal. like this is how he always studies with people.

(does he?)

(no. he can’t.)

“y/n?” he says, and you jolt like you’ve been electrocuted.

“hm?”

“i asked if you’d like to walk through the case brief again. you seem... distant.”

you clear your throat and try not to sound like someone whose brain has just been wiped by a thigh. “yeah, no, i’m fine. just tired.”

he nods solemnly. “understandable. your coursework has been particularly intensive.”

he says it like he knows your schedule better than you do—which he might. you’ve seen his planner. you’re pretty sure he’s memorized the entire academic calendar, national holidays included.

you try to return to your notes.

you fail.

eventually, you lean back in your chair and exhale.

“okay,” you say. “i need to ask you something.”

he looks up, immediately attentive. “yes?”

you glance around—no one’s within earshot— and lean in slightly.

“this thing we do.”

he blinks. “studying?”

“no. i mean yes, but no.” you gesture vaguely between the two of you. “this. the muffins. the flashcards. the... sitting so close i can smell your laundry detergent.”

he goes still.

“i’m just trying to understand if we’re, like...” you hesitate. “is this just a really intense academic friendship or are we... flirting?”

he doesn’t speak for a long moment.

then, carefully: “i hadn’t realized my proximity was making you uncomfortable.”

“it’s not!” you say, too quickly. “it’s just... confusing.”

“confusing how?”

you fidget with the cap of your pen. “because we do things that feel... date-adjacent. and i don’t know if that’s just how you are with people or if i’m—” you stop yourself before you can say not imagining it.

his brows draw together, faintly perplexed. “i apologize. i didn’t mean to cause confusion.”

you blink. “so you are flirting?”

his ears go pink. just slightly. “i wouldn’t define it as flirting. but i do enjoy spending time with you.”

you squint at him. “that’s not a no.”

he hesitates. then, quieter: “it’s not.”

oh.

you stare at him. he stares back.

and then—like the universe can’t stand unresolved tension—your knees bump again.

but this time, he doesn’t shift away.

and neither do you.

⋆˚✿˖°

you don’t call it a date.

not out loud.

not even in your head, really—not technically. because you’re not dating. you haven’t kissed. there’s been no confession. there’s been no moment of clarity where either of you has stood dramatically in the rain and said i think about you all the time, which, honestly, is a bit disappointing.

but you still change your outfit three times before meeting him for coffee on saturday.

you still hesitate in front of the mirror, adjusting your sleeves and second-guessing your hair, muttering get a grip under your breath like it’s a prayer.

you still pause at the door to the café, one hand on the handle, and remind yourself—again—that this isn’t a date.

you’re just meeting up. casually. like friends.

friends who sometimes sit with their knees touching under library tables. friends who share muffins and steal glances and somehow always find reasons to linger a little too long in doorways.

friends who, if they weren’t so emotionally constipated, might’ve figured this out already.

but you push the door open anyway, and the little bell overhead chimes bright and familiar.

he’s already there.

of course he is.

tenya iida is punctual to the point of pathology. if you told him to meet you in the afterlife at 3:00 p.m. sharp, he’d be there early, holding a clipboard and a fully prepared powerpoint.

he’s sitting near the window, back straight, hands folded politely in his lap. his hair is a little messy from the wind outside. his sweater is navy—clean, simple, a little oversized in a way that makes you stare longer than you should.

he sees you and stands immediately, which is both adorable and completely unnecessary.

“you’re early,” he says, voice warm.

“so are you.”

he doesn’t reply, but the smile he gives you is soft around the edges.

you order something with too much caffeine and not enough nutritional value. he offers to pay, like he always does. you decline, like you always do. it’s a silent tradition now, a ritual of stubbornness. he lets it go with a quiet nod, but not without giving you that look—the one that says i was raised right and this physically pains me.

you find a booth in the corner, a little more secluded than the rest. the sun spills in through the window in soft golden streaks, and for a moment, it feels like you’re somewhere outside of time.

“i’ve never seen you wear that color,” he says as you sit down.

you glance at your shirt. “yeah? too much?”

he shakes his head immediately. “no. it suits you.”

your mouth goes a little dry.

you recover quickly, leaning back and sipping your drink like it doesn’t mean anything. like the warmth crawling up your neck is from the coffee and not the compliment.

“so,” you say, clearing your throat. “what’s on the agenda for today? rigorous academic analysis? philosophical debates about economic ethics? impromptu pop quizzes?”

he tilts his head. “i thought we might take the day off.”

you blink. “from... studying?”

“from everything.” he shrugs, a little sheepishly. “i realized we’ve never spent time together without a textbook between us.”

your heart does something strange.

“you mean like... just hang out?”

“yes.”

“like friends.”

he hesitates. just barely. “yes. like friends.”

the words hang in the air between you—awkward, uncertain, but not unkind.

you nod, slowly. “okay. yeah. we can do that.”

and you do.

you talk. not about school, not about deadlines or group projects or the upcoming midterm. you talk about dumb childhood stories and weird food preferences and the fact that he once tried to start a recycling initiative in his middle school and was very upset when no one followed the sorting chart correctly.

you tell him about your obsession with terrible reality TV. he listens with the seriousness of a man taking notes for a thesis.

he tells you about his older brother, and how much he looks up to him. you tell him about the stray cat that used to follow you home in high school, even though you never fed it.

he laughs—really laughs—when you tell him about the time you broke your nose in gym class trying to dodge a volleyball and ran straight into a bleacher.

“i’m sorry,” he says between gasps. “i don’t mean to laugh at your pain.”

“no, you do,” you say, grinning. “and it’s okay. i would too.”

at one point, your knees bump under the table again. this time, neither of you pulls away.

it’s later than you mean it to be when you finally leave the café. the sun is dipping low, the sky tinged with lavender and orange. the street is quiet, and the wind bites just enough to make you zip your jacket up.

you walk together. not toward the library, not toward another class—just aimlessly. like people who have nowhere else to be.

it’s peaceful.

and weirdly... intimate.

you’re not talking. not really. the silence between you is comfortable now, lived-in. every so often your hands brush, and you wonder—wildly, stupidly —what would happen if you just reached out.

but you don’t.

because this isn’t a date.

it’s not.

except maybe... it is.

“this was nice,” you say, when you finally reach the crosswalk where you’ll part ways.

he nods. “i enjoyed it.”

there’s a beat of silence.

“we should do it again,” you say. casually. like it doesn’t mean anything.

but he looks at you like it does.

“i’d like that,” he says. and then—“you’re very easy to be around.”

your breath catches.

you want to say something. you’re easy to be around too. i think about you when we’re not together. i don’t know if i’m imagining this but i hope i’m not.

instead, you say, “you’re weirdly charming, you know that?”

he blinks. “i—thank you?”

you grin. “it’s a compliment. mostly.”

he laughs. soft. pleased. “i’ll take it.”

he takes a small step back, like he’s about to leave —but then pauses.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

“if this had been a date...” he clears his throat. “would that have been... agreeable to you?”

you stare at him.

then, slowly—carefully—you nod.

“yeah,” you say. “i think it would’ve been.”

he smiles. it’s small. tentative. but it lights up his whole face.

“then maybe next time, we won’t pretend.”

you feel like you’re floating.

“deal.”

he nods once. then, with a strange, lingering sort of hesitation—like he’s not ready to go yet—he turns to leave.

you watch him go.

and for the first time in a long time, you feel... hopeful.

⋆˚✿˖°

you don't know what you're expecting.

when he texts you the next morning—same time tuesday? not for studying this time. if you're free.—you stare at it for a good ten minutes before responding. not because you’re unsure of your answer (you’re not), but because the implication hits like a freight train.

not for studying.

not as friends.

just you. just him. again.

this time, it’s a little different.

this time, he’s calling it what it is.

you don’t overthink your reply (for once). you just type yeah. i’m free and throw your phone face-down before your heart can beat out of your chest.

and when tuesday rolls around, you are twenty minutes early.

you tell yourself it’s because the weather’s nice and the walk was shorter than usual and you didn’t want to cut it close. but the truth is, you’ve been ready since noon.

you’re wearing the sweater he said he liked once, months ago, after a study session where he handed you a highlighter and your fingers brushed and you both paused like the world might end. it’s not even your warmest or your nicest sweater. it’s just... the one he looked at a little too long.

you don’t want to admit what that means.

you sit in your usual seat by the window. a small table, worn edges. your coffee in hand. no textbooks. no flashcards. just the sound of the café around you and the low simmer of anticipation in your chest.

he walks in three minutes early, which is basically scandalous by iida standards.

you glance up, and the second your eyes meet, he smiles.

it’s not his usual polite, committee-appropriate smile.

it’s something else.

something softer.

he sits down across from you like he’s been doing it his whole life.

you stare at him for a second too long.

“you’re early,” he says, like it’s a fact worth noting. his voice is gentler than usual.

“so are you.”

“a rare occurrence.”

“should i be concerned?”

he laughs—quietly, warmly. “i thought you might say that.”

you both go quiet.

not awkward quiet. just... full.

full of everything you’re not saying.

you sip your drink and hope your heart doesn’t explode.

twenty minutes in, you realize you’ve forgotten what time it is.

again.

you’re talking about something stupid—a professor you both silently hate but never speak ill of in class—and he’s mimicking their voice in a whisper, hand shielding his mouth, and you’re laughing.

like genuinely, honestly laughing.

like you don’t have a hundred things weighing you down.

he always does that. makes everything feel easier. lighter.

it’s dangerous, how much you like it.

how much you like him.

you haven’t said it. not out loud. not even to yourself.

but the truth is: you’re in trouble.

deep trouble.

because tenya iida has the power to wreck you in a way no one else ever has.

not because he’s dramatic. not because he’s charming (though he is, in that annoying, understated, golden-retriever-with-a-perfect-credit-score kind of way).

but because he’s steady.

because he means things.

because when he looks at you, it’s like you’re someone worth understanding.

and you’ve never been loved gently before.

not like this.

you walk out together.

neither of you mentions how long you stayed. it’s dark out, but neither of you cares.

you walk close, side by side. your hands brush once, then again. his fingers twitch toward yours, and you pretend not to notice—not because you don’t want it, but because you’re not sure what happens if you reach back.

you talk about nothing. and everything.

he tells you about the time his older brother accidentally dyed his hair blue with a shampoo prank and how no one in their house was allowed to mention it for an entire year.

you tell him about the time you accidentally set off a fire alarm trying to microwave leftover curry in a dorm that very explicitly prohibited strong-smelling food.

“you’re a menace,” he says, laughing.

you bump your shoulder into his. “you say that like it’s a bad thing.”

he glances at you. “i didn’t say that.”

you both stop at the crosswalk—the same one where you stood days ago.

the same one where he asked if this had been a date...

you’re not pretending anymore.

and yet.

you don’t know what to say.

you just look at him, the wind brushing through your sleeves, your fingers cold where they’re shoved into your pockets.

he looks at you.

longer than before.

long enough that your heart stumbles.

and then—quietly—he says, “can i ask you something?”

you nod. “of course.”

his voice is softer than you’ve ever heard it. careful.

“why me?”

you blink. “what?”

“why... this?” he gestures gently between you. “i know i’m not the most exciting person. i’m not particularly funny or... spontaneous.”

you frown. “iida.”

“i’m just trying to understand,” he says. “why you keep showing up.”

you want to say because i like the way you talk when you’re tired, or because your laugh makes me want to listen to every dumb story you’ve ever told.

you want to say because i’ve never felt so calm next to another person in my entire life.

instead, you say, “because when i’m with you, i don’t feel like i have to be anyone else.”

his expression shifts.

his jaw tightens. his eyes soften.

he takes a step closer.

“i don’t want to mess this up,” he says.

“you’re not.”

“i don’t want to misread it.”

you exhale, a laugh escaping despite yourself. “you’re not.”

his hand lifts, hesitates—then lands gently against your cheek.

you stop breathing.

“may i kiss you?” he asks.

you nod before your brain catches up.

“yeah,” you whisper. “you may.”

and he does.

it’s not rushed.

it’s not fiery or desperate.

it’s patient. reverent. like he’s memorizing the feeling. like he’s been waiting for the right moment and this, finally, is it.

his lips press softly against yours, and your hands lift automatically to his jacket, holding on, grounding yourself.

when you part, he leans his forehead against yours.

you’re both quiet for a moment.

then he says, “i’ve wanted to do that for a long time.”

you smile. “i could tell.”

“was i too obvious?”

“painfully.”

he laughs, arms sliding around your waist like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

“this is still new,” he says. “i know that.”

you nod.

“but i’m willing to take it slow.”

“okay.”

“i’ll be patient.”

“okay.”

he pauses. “and i’d like to take you to dinner. an actual dinner. with reservations and menus and probably overpriced appetizers.”

you grin. “are you asking me on a real date?”

he lifts your hand and presses a kiss to your knuckles.

“yes,” he says. “i’m asking.”

“then yes,” you reply. “i’m saying yes.”

you walk home hand-in-hand.

you don’t have to say anything.

it’s not pretending anymore.

and for once—finally—that feels like enough.

why does it correspond to the riddler im in tear

Don’t yell at me tumblr, there’s no nips or dicks.

Come get your Steddie fix. This took forever.