(NSFW EDITION)

Haha my REALLY LONG bayverse turtle headcanons

Part Two: Their Anatomy

(NSFW EDITION)

FIRST I have extremely cute ones to make up for the fucking cringe I'm about to shove down your throats 😥

Nostrils pointed AT YOUR FACE. They feel bad about this once in a while but you can feel them breathing DIRECTLY into your eyes and you will have to make loving eye contact while pretending your eyes aren't shriveling up like raisins.

Holding his hand is extremely weird at first cuz of the three fingers. and he is EXTREMELY aware of that so be prepared to suck that shit up for him 😭 he will feel so bad. Also all the turtles get weirded out when you're seeing/touching their feet for the first time. He'll be like, "ew wtf don't look at me-". Will sometimes stare at your joined hands on the table; even if he's supposed to be paying attention to something else. He just kinda stares in wonder at the symbolic acceptance there; you're fingers wrapped around his.

Cuddle marks 🥺 your turtle will feel super bad when they see them on your face, back or tummy, but you wear them will pride. Case in point, the turtles are EXTREMELY TEXTURED MEN and are not exactly comfy cuddle material. Skin to skin WILL get you marked up if you lay on their arm or chest too long. He will HATE it unless you love it. Then he might come to like it.

He is so warm. You could curl up with him in the chilly lair for HOURS because it's literally perfect. And if you are prone to having cold hands and feet? Worry not. He finds them a LIFESAVER and might even ask you to place them somewhere he needs to cool off. Like the back of his neck or his face 😭

His kisses are extremely overwhelming and awkward if he isn't aware of it. His mouth is WAY bigger than yours, and so are his lips. To kiss his small human property he must do so GENTLY for it to be pleasant, unfortunately. Make-out sessions toe a thin line. But let's face it, everywhere else on your body is FREE GAME😘

Getting undressed in any way, shape or form will be the most stressful part for him the first few intimate times. He will be so unhappy to do it, might even try to avoid it entirely. So don't let him. Instead, help him through it. Undress him slowly and kiss anything new you see, encourage him to do the same to you.

They have stretch marks. You'll think their scars or turtle stripes at first. But they are super pretty light green marks behind their shoulder, under their arms, their sides and legs. You mostly find them in areas of skin. But you can spot them between his scales sometimes.

DIM THE LIGHTS. His stress levels will lower with them. You'll need light, yes. But give him shelter.

mask OFF. Respect what makes him comfortable, and if he really doesn't want it off, don't take it away. But three out of four turtles don't take their masks off easily, so you might have to plead to see their face. They look VERY DIFFERENT without their masks. He will feel the most vulnerable and ugly without it, so once it's off? SMOTHER that mother fucker in kisses 😭 he needs to know you don't think he's revolting.

Okay CRINGE TIME.

SEX WITH LITERAL TURTLE MEN

MINORS DNI (NSFW Turtle Anatomy)

Plasteron layout is different on every turtle. But they all have really cool navel scutes and ridges 🤤

Plasteron isn't sensitive, but rubbing the skin under his shell it's a good way to get him to gasp. Featherlight touches over his v-line will get his hips to twitch. Or running your tongue along the edge of his plasteron- particularly the collarbone or abdomen areas, where shell meets skin- duuude his shivers will be more than worth it. They are all touch-starved, so sensations like these will be new and instantly addicting.

They have tails. Small stubby triangular ones just at the end of their spines. Due to the mutation, it's kinda hard for your turtle to move it consciously. Kinda like moving your ears. Their tails are completely useless, easy to hide with clothes, overwhelmingly cute and they are very SENSITIVE.

The physically can't get pegged lmao. They don't have a back door. Just like turtles, their bodies do NOT separate urine and feces like humans do. Instead they have one cloaca. They don't have a G-spot like humans.

Inside his cloaca is where they hide their junk. It is located where a human woman's clitoris is. It's just under the last pair of their scutes; which frame the soft pinkish slit in an upward chevron pattern. No balls! Instead, he has internal ridged structures between his legs to protect the sensitive organs inside. A kick between a turtles legs would earn a curse and anger, but it wouldn't cripple him. The cloaca's entrance isn't sensitive unless aroused. Arousal often causes his cloaca to swell and lubricate in readiness to drop.

Erections are extremely uncomfortable. They have powerful muscles that can keep their fully erect penis mostly inside, but it hurts. Their discipline is incredible, and if they don't want out, it takes A LOT to get them out. Movement like walking is extremely undesirable with an erection, as it only stimulates his penis and stretches and stimulates reproductive muscles.

They drop their penis. They can drop it at any time. Dropping and pulling (retracting) an unaroused penis isn't a big deal. It's super small but still sensitive, so expect your turtle to slap your hand in the shower if you try to touch it. But dropping a fully aroused penis actually kinda hurts him upfront- because his dick is fucking HUGE and it has to push through his small cloaca slit.

His penis is scary AF. You have to try so hard to not let it show though because he knows. It's a gradient of light to dark purple, the tip being the darkest. Shaped nearly like a shovel 😂. The tip is super spongey though and doesn't get ridged...but everything else does. You will not, I repeat, will NOT be able to fit it in the first try. Like at all.

The tip is the most sensitive. Its pointed shape makes it easy to slide out of the cloaca. A fully aroused penis inside the sheath isn't always easy to hold completely in. Just the tip can still cause tent in his pants.

Once he's out, he's OUT until he's satisfied or unaroused. It's like, literally impossible to pull back a fully aroused god sized dick into a tiny sheath, a tiny sheath that feels MUCH BETTER with it out.

His orgasm is really long. Human male orgasms last between 10-30 seconds. But his? 1-2 minutes. It's less one orgasm and more ten to fifteen rapid fire smaller orgasms. He cums, a lot. Not just literally cumming a lot of fluid, because it's A LOT of fluid. But he will literally be in an orgasmic state three times longer than you will be.

Orgasmic cuddles are his embarrassment and his darkest need.

Leo and Donnie have a habit of pinning their lover down on the bed in a quick fit of urgency. Then just staying there; breathing through the pleasure as if it's something to endure. Then in an attempt to hide their desperation they'll shakily attend to aftercare, fighting through the surges 🥴 they'll need a partner to tell them that they're okay. It's okay, keep going babe, you're alright. C'mere keep moving. Move with it, c'mon. Don't stop till it's over. You're okay. You're doing so good baby, I know. I know, you feel so good, keep going- Donnie is the loudest and Leo shakes the most during orgasmic stimulation.

Raph stops, curls up and curses in a nearly high voice before pulling out suddenly, hiding his face while he thrusts desperately into his own hand. You'll have to hold his head close while he pushes through this as fast as he can. He hates this and is embarrassed by it. To get him back inside won't be hard though. Just a few whispers and pets to his face and his hips are back to work, albeit much more shakey and forceful. He'll be fighting his own strength the entire time, trying not to squeeze and break you in his pleasure.

Mikey is whiney and twitchy but he can hold a conversation. He just has no idea what you're saying. He'll be trying to get you water and asking if you're okay all while he's busy trying not to pull your hair and push you down as he takes his pleasure. He'll beg to stay inside for a bit longer though. Then when you twitch or move around him he does this thing with his hips as if he's soothing you both and omfg it looks so good on him. He's hard to resist.

ANYWAY If you stop moving, you're turtle will just need to hug you for a bit. Maybe hide his face somewhere, bite something while his body tightens through breathing exercises with his hips twitching hard into yours a few times. He can try to talk but it's strained, and if he reaches for something or changes positions he'll be shaking like a leaf.

But mannn if you continue stimulation, like if you ducked down to give him head while he's still cumming~ he's not gonna leave the bed on working legs. And your pillows would probably be torn in half. And you are either fixing his bitten lip after OR your neighbors would hate you forever. Cuz...the noise.

Cleanup is a fucking killer for everyone involved. The turtles won't want to stand up and your an absolute WRECK and all you two will want to do is sleep. But too bad. You gotta get up to pee and he has his...MESS to clean up.

Stamina is unheard of. Sorry girls. No multiple rounds with these guys. BUT good thing it takes for-fucking-EVER for him to orgasm.

Cuddles after tho are INCREDIBLE and will knock you both out in seconds.