Goals Bonding Activities If You Ask Me

me: *casually rewatching supernatural* look at the sillies!! they are just goofy lil guys :]

this fucking quote:

‘Decide to be fine until the end of the week. Make yourself smile, because you’re alive and that’s your job. Then do it again the next week.’

me:

i probably relate to this an unhealthy amount but it really just ghggnhdfgsd *bangs head against the wall and screams* yk?

Whatever lets you sleep at night

Sure you will

An AU in which Jason, upon returning to Gotham, gets really swept up into the whole crime lord thing, and never gets the time to go through with his revenge plan.

It starts small. He comes back and gets to work, and after a while, he has managed to carve out some of the crime from crime alley. This gets him noticed among some of the people there. One night, a group of thugs approach him, but instead of wanting to fight him, they want to work for him.

Jason, still fresh, with not much revenue coming for him yet, tells them that he isn't hiring because he cannot exactly pay them much. The thugs say that it doesn't matter, because they like what he is doing, and would like to be in on it anyway, and, well. If Jason has help managing other things, he can dedicate more time on his bigger plan, right?

Wrong. Things start to move much quicker now, and that means that more people come in and want to work for him. At this point Jason has money coming in, and he starts paying them, too, which makes more people come in, which in turn makes more money to come in as well. Jason can pay them more, and suddenly he notices a difference in many of the goons he has on his roster now. They seem happier. They joke more, many of them have better clothes on them, and they don't look so gaunt anymore, either.

Jason asks about it, once, and the goon tells him that they have had the money to buy actual groceries and new pair of boots, which makes living a lot more comfortable. They even got to buy their kid a new winter jacket! Now, if they save up a little bit, they will be able to get their kid new school books as well!

And Jason, Crime Alley boy Jason, who loved school and reading, feels his heart strings being violently yanked. Don't worry about the books, he says. I will take care of it.

At the end of the month, he has managed to organise a book delivery system for all the Crime Alley kids, where they get school books and picture books and science books about dinosaurs and angient Egypt and all that. He tells his goons that for every kid that stays in school for the semester, he will give them a bonus.

It works wonders. The amount of kids dropping out from school gets cut by 60 percent just during the first semester. The book system grows, and suddenly Jason finds himself pushing some money to get the old local library running again, to make things a bit easier. He even hires some people to run the system for him. Suddenly, he is like actually employing people. He needs an accountant. He hires one for himself, and then another one to run other funds.

Things just keep escalating after that. Local parent group starts to have meetings in the new library, and they put up a babysitting club and start a clothes exhange program as well, where you can bring all the clothes that are too small for you, and people get to take what they need home. A soup kitchen starts as well, first because the kids need snacks, and then it grows so much that Jason needs to find a place for it to run effectively and safely. Many local restaurants get into it as well, and their business starts to rise as well, because people who are fed and have warm clothes have more time and energy to seek for jobs. Many of them are still employed within just Crime Alley, though, because jobs elsewhere require an adress, and some people don't have those.

Jason thinks about himself, after his parents died, on the streets, trying to survive, and thinks never again. He tells his accountant to start budgeting for housing.

He needs to hire more people for it. He needs to run his crime empire, after all, he doesn't have the time for this.

He has so many people working for him now. There are a few thugs that were previously employed by other Gotham Rogues coming in as well, because they have heard good things about the Red Hood. The other Rogues are in and out of the prison or Arkham all the time and the pay isn't reliable and there is a high chance that you will get beaten up by one of the bats as well, and they don't really get offered medical services by their bosses, you know?

There's another thing. Jason now has to organize people to get first aid-training. And also get some sort of vaccination program going. And also get everybody dental.

It's all getting too much for him, really. He doesn't even have a high school diploma.

He mentions this to one of his goons one night, because they said that he looked stressed. Don't worry boss! The goon tells him. We will take care of things, if you want to go back to school! It would be a good example, too, for the older kids, who are still dropping out more than the little kids, you know?

So Jason goes back to school. God he loves school. He barely even thinks about his revenge plan anymore, because he is busy running his programs and studying and making plans with his goons.

He gets his diploma and then starts a community college so people can get degrees.

He then runs into an entirely new problem. The people look up to him, especially the kids. And now the kids also want to help him.

Jason, the second Robin, the bird with clipped wings, tells them no. Absolutely not. You are kids, go back to school, your bedtime is at nine.

He cannot control the older teens, though. They just tell him to fuck off and accept the help. Now train us, so we can start running the more specialized missions too. You can't be the only person jumping on rooftops. If you don't train us, we will do it anyway, dipshit. We ain't scared of you.

And suddenly Jason has his own vigilante team with him. His workers are unionizing. Some of them are actually running for the city council to get things addressed that need to be done the legal way. Crime rates have dropped by 70 percent around Crime Alley.

They can't really call it Crime Alley anymore, can they? It's Park Row again.

The bats are extremely confused by the new team. The Hoods, they call themselves. All of them with a red bat painted on their chests and fighting in an eerily similar manner to them.

Jason is not there on Thursdays. He is busy getting his English degree.

Gotham City Subway

The only Robin who can squat during a train ride is Stephanie Brown; sadly, Damian doesn’t currently have the skill.

Random Things Cale Henituse had done Without Context

adopted 14 children in a month

threw money into lava

stole cookies from royalty

scammed a vampire to give him an allowance

ate a rock

set a lake on fire

bribed a prince with poison

impersonated a priest

fed a hobo

stole a tree

dived into a mummy lake

wished to cough blood elegantly

hand-embroidered outfits

served a freaked-out dragon tea

forced a prince to make an MMORPG account

made his enemy wash the dishes

beat up a guy with a rock

fed a tree

commiserated with a god over work-related sleep deprivation

let his kid eat poison

sang creepy hide and seek song

tried to dig a hole in the ground and failed

gave away bones as a present

converted a barbarian with the Power of Friendship

blew up an island (twice)

stripped in front of his bff's uncle

blew up a whirlpool

hugged his arch nemesis

defenestrated a man

got compared to a haystack

strangled a guy with his bare hands

ate a battery

fought a lake

stabbed himself with a stick

...Feel free to keep it going. The weirder and more random the better. Let's see if we can catch all the references lol

"What do you call a dog with no legs?"

Cale suddenly broke the silence in Alebru's office with a emotionless voice.

The redhead was lying on the sofa and did not look up from the documents with which he was helping the blonde

Alberu rised his head from his own documents, confused by the question without context.

"What?"

"Doesn’t matter what you call him, he won’t come anyway."

Cale grins when Alberu chokes and keep reading the documents calmly.

Jason Todd with his goons:

wlw on mlm violence

OML YES PLEASE ‼️‼️‼️⁉️⁉️ I need the batfamily failing to keep up with the team red in action. Peter and Wade being agents of chaos and Matt is so used to it that he is just as chaotic as them.

Jason joining them just because Bruce is looking increasingly more defeated the more he is in the red's ™ presence.

+Tim joining forces with peter because between the two of them there's 0 impulse control and a lot of IQ

dc and marvel crossover (slash peter parker in gotham prompt) but all of the members of team red end up in gotham without knowing that the others are stuck there too

cue matt, wade, and peter trying desperately to figure out what’s going on for weeks before eventually running into each other like

(bonus points if they all befriend a different wayne and it happens at wayne manor)

I love them man

One of the reasons I love Spideypool is bcuz Wade's feelings for Spiderman aren't just played off as a joke this time. In almost every piece of media where Deadpool's pansexuality is shown, it's played off as a joke because to film bros, that's all queerness will ever be. A joke. But in the Spiderman/Deadpool comics, it's a bit different.

Like, okay, sometimes they're used as a joke, but ultimately, in the comics, they're actually something important.

I'm just starting issue 13, so I'm still early and don't know much still, so please bare with me herw. But even then, Wade's crush on Spidey is what makes him want to be a hero. His crush on Spidey and wanting to impress him is what makes Spidey more open to their friendship and lead to his character growth, see that not everything is black and white (that one drug dealing thing), and he sees that Deadpool isn't as much of a bad person as he thinks he is. Also, it gives Spidey a friend, which he so desperately needs in this comic.

Also, for fucks sake, he had his wife (dw, Spiderman is on the free pass list. Shiklah signed it and everything) KILL him just so he could go in the after life and revive Peter after he killed him, BEFORE even knowing that Peter was Spiderman. Soulmate behaviour fr

Also, I talked about how his attraction to men is used as a joke, but I want to talk about one scene where him having a crush on Spidey is used for a joke, but it's not the focus.

Love this moment because 1) it's adorable and 2) the joke isn't "haha, Deadpool is attracted to men" the joke is "haha, Deadpool is embarrassed about how much he talks about Spidey." It's a cute moment and doesn't have slightly homophobic undertones.