Once Again, I Find Myself Thinking About That Cabenson Kiss That Was Filmed, But Never Saw The Light

Jane had been off all night. Maura had asked twice and had been shut down abrasively. When they left The Dirty Robber, Maura didn't want to invite Jane home with her, even though she still wanted to know what was wrong.

But Jane asked, and Maura was polite so she said yes.

+++

"I'm going to head out." Jane had nursed one beer all evening, and said nothing else. Jane stood, and Maura stood to walk her out, knowing better than to ask again or to offer Jane to stay over.

Jane ducked her head quickly as Maura was distracted by the door and kissed her. Maura left the door alone, turning in Jane's arms.

Jane was tall and muscular and strong and she kissed hard and fierce, like she was trying to prove something. It didn't hurt, but it wasn't great, and Jane's hands were under Maura's shirt already somehow, like Jane was a teenage boy and she'd driven Maura home after a movie or something. Like they were waiting for Maura's parents to open the front door and catch them making out.

The only parent here was Jane's, though, and she was still at work.

Jane pulled away, her face a bright red blush.

"Um. Goodnight," Jane said, fumbling with the door behind her, unable to look away. Maura could have mercy and let her go. She could open the door and allow herself time to process. Or she could question Jane. There were so many questions, and she didn't know where to start.

"Did you mean to do that?" Maura asked, and Jane nodded, her eyes wide and a little scared now, still fumbling for the lock behind her. "Is there a reason you meant to do that?"

Jane slouched against the door and groaned.

"I'm sorry, okay? I just wanted to know what it was like. Just once. Just to see if I liked it. And I didn't want to talk about it."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Did you like it?"

Jane's eyes caught Maura's lips and she nodded slowly, her eyes worried but her mouth stretching into a smile.

"Yeah. Yeah, I did."

"Well I didn't. Is that how you kiss men?"

Jane shrugged, looking down at her books, utterly dejected.

"Do you even like men? If that's how you kiss men, I'm pretty sure you don't."

"I like you," Jane said quietly.

"And I didn't like kissing you. It was like kissing a man. All action and no finesse." Maura stepped closer, and Jane shrank back against the door, looking so terrified that Maura almost had mercy.

Almost.

"If I wanted to be kissing a man, I'd be kissing a man right now. But I'd rather kiss you."

She brought herself close to Jane, who was desperately pressed against the door behind her. She leaned forward, licking her lips, letting her breath flow through Jane's open mouth, watching her sharp inhale. She raised a hand and brushed Jane's unruly hair behind her ear, then leaned forward again, dragging her lips across Jane's pulsing jugular, feeling the tilt of Jane's hips into her as she did. She pressed a few little kisses along Jane's jaw, hearing her strangled whimpers and smirking to herself. Then she drew back a little, focused on Jane's mouth and closed the distance with her lips.

Jane had been all tongue and teeth, but she clung desperately to Maura's forearms, resting on the door either side of Jane's head, delicious little moans drawn from her throat as Maura gently pressed closed mouth kisses against Jane's lips until they parted for her, Jane's breath uneven, her hands finding purchase on Maura's hips and pulling her closer, the heat of her pelvis nearly burning against Maura's belly. Maura introduced her tongue to the mix, slowly and tenderly cataloguing Jane's lips and teeth and tongue, catching Jane's lower lip between her teeth and gently tugging until she felt Jane's knees buckle.

She pulled away, but not far.

"That's how you kiss a woman, Jane. Like she's precious. Like she's worth taking your time with her. Like you value her emotionally," Maura informed her. She looked Jane over; she was a mess, her face and chest flushed bright red, her legs trembling, keeping herself upright with her grip on Maura. Her lips were plump and dark from the increased blood flow, and Maura could feel the way Jane was straining not to press her pelvis any harder into her. Jane nodded slowly, as though she hadn't heard a word, her eyes fixed on Maura's mouth. Maura could finish Jane off fully clothed without even touching her, but she had mercy.

Or maybe she was being just a little bit mean, letting Jane leave in such a state.

"Goodnight," Maura said, reaching behind Jane and unlocking the door. She saw Jane's shoulders slump as she peeled herself away from Maura, reaching for the door handle.

"You know, your legs look unsteady. Perhaps you'd better not drive home. You know you're always welcome to stay."

Jane looked down at her hopefully, and Maura knew suddenly how Korsak felt, all those helpless puppies giving him those hopeful eyes.

"I can?"

"Only if you plan on kissing me again." Maura wondered how much of the rush Jane had been in was Catholic guilt and repressed homophobia, and how much of it had been sheer nerves. But Jane turned the lock with confidence and pushed Maura back gently, all the way back to the kitchen counter.

"Oh, I plan to. I plan to kiss you like a woman." Jane's grin was wicked, but her hands were gentle.

Jane's eyes searched Maura's face, dropping down to her lips, followed by Jane's mouth, soft and sure this time, like she had all the time in the world.

Not my gay ass becoming utterly obsessed with Rizzles in 2023 - I mean, this kind of queerbaiting is torturous 😭

does anyone else get that horrible feeling when ur watching a show that you like, but you can feel the heterosexual romance building up, u know the signs, and it’s like ur in a horror movie except instead of a monster it’s the protagonists annoying boyfriend to be

And it is so deliciously gay-galing.

I Care a Lot really said gaslight gatekeep girlboss gone girl all in one breath huh

Season 2 ep 3: They just HAVE to continue calling each other "babe" plz 😭

My first attempt at writing FanFiction myself :)

So I've really been wanting to get back into writing. I've actually started to write poetry again after a years-long break but I'm also trying to do stuff that is somewhat light and more "fun", and after discovering my love for fanfiction, I am now trying to give it a go!

So this is my veery first fanfic and updates will happen - hopefully - probably every couple of days. I know that I'll write only sapphic content so that's probably somewhat niche, especially because with Law and Order: SVU, there doesn't seem too much of a femslash-fandom, but I guess I write mostly for myself anyway so yeah: Rolivia, here we go!

Oh, my story is set in an alternative universe where Rollins is a teacher and Olivia a school principal.

Trigger warning for later mentions of sa and self-destructive behaviors (e.g. alcoholism), PTSD

I guess it will be mostly comfort/hurt, romance, but in a somewhat darker way maybe?

...and we were roommates 😏

"The Girl Upstairs" - a Slow-Burn deliciously put together, served with some extra layers of angst, fluff, banter and seasoned with sexiness ;)

Title of Fic: "The Girl Upstairs"

Author:  laok

Fandom/Pairing: "Grey's Anatomy", Arizona Robbins/Calliope Torres

Synopsis: Callie and Arizona are both 2nd-year-med students living in the same house off-campus during university terms. They do not get along at first - like, at all. Arizona lives upstairs from Callie and their first encounter happens when she throws a very loud student party, making Callie race upstairs and complain about the noise. Knowing our fierce ladies, it's not suprising that Arizona does not only not back off, but that they enter some kind of weird, but incredibly well written and believable "Who can annoy the sh*t out of the other one more thoroughly"-competition, with Callie watching horror movies as loud as possible during the most inconvenient hours and Arizona playing Disney songs at full volume. They develop very creative insults to haul at each other, their fights becoming a seemingly never-ending source of amusement to their respective friend-groups. However, they both share a passion the other one does not know about (because, like aforementioned, they are too busy getting on each other's nerves and behaving like rabid dogs whenever they encounter each other): They love to cook, with Callie even secretly running her own quite successful "Students-on-a-Budget"-specialized cooking blog she takes great pride in. When a nice stranger starts to leave encouraging comments on her blog regularly, Callie finds herself able to open up a little, although she is still going through a tough healing process after several heartbreaks she had to endure. "C" and "A" start to exchange e-mails, while Callie and Arizona find themselves trapped in a very uncomfortable situation when in one of their classes, they are paired as lab-partners and forced to work together. What begins as a total disaster, though, seems to very slowly unfold into something much more pleasant, maybe even... well, pleasurable?

I love me a good slow-burn and this one really manages to have it all: the enemies-to-lovers arc simply makes the pining, the yearning, the questioning, the misunderstandings between these two even more intense and the author of this fic has really done justice to both characters, managing to let them be very much Callie and Arizona while developing her very own, original story that could (and should, if you ask me!) easily be turned into a lesbian romcom with alll the right ingredients for our touch-starved souls and little hungry-for-happy-ends-hearts. Yes, it is a veery slow slow-burn, but that's exactly what makes this piece of fiction so special because of the way we really get to know Callie and Arizona on a deeper level, the author doing such a great job of giving insight to their fears, hopes and thoughts. I'll definitely enjoy this one again!

Rating: M

"Ocean Nora" - a Rizzles story par excellence

Title of Fic: "Ocean Nora"

Author: KathleenDee

Fandom/Pairing: "Rizzoli & Isles", Maura Isles and Jane Rizzoli ("Rizzles")

TW: /

Rating: M

Synopsis: Set in the canonical Rizzoli & Isles universe, this story is a Jane and Maura love story worth reading. Maura is the one here who finally makes a tentative move - and Jane finds herself wondering... When they finally acknowledge that there is more between them than "just friendship", they decide to take things slow but explore their romantic feelings for one another after years of not giving in to temptation.

"Ocean Nora" beautifully explores the main character's feelings, their thoughts, their actions. It is incredible how the author managed to get not only Jane and Maura just right, but also all the side characters that appear throughout the story. It is full of warmth, fluff, but also some slightly angsty moments. The slow-burn here is written exquisitely well, you find yourself rooting for the detective and the medical examiner so much it makes you forget everything else around you.

Also, the way the author writes about Jane's cases and Maura's autopsies is utterly brilliant, they're woven into the plot seamlessly, it's basically like watching Rizzoli & Isles on TV only better because we get the love story we're all pining for!

I found myself wishing more than once that KathleenDee could have been an actuall screenwriter for the show cuz "Ocean Nora" would actually be the perfect take on Rizzles!

I'm still a little speechless about the way the fic writer poured her heart and stoul into this story. The time and effort writing this gem of a story must have taken up - I'm in awe and I'll never cease to be madly in love with this brilliant, heartwarming piece of writing.

Please note that while this fic is currently not finished, you get 45 chapters of absolute quality content that will keep you up well into the night - I just could not tear myself away from it. No matter if this ever again gets updated or not, if you ship Rizzles, this should be one of the fics to not miss out on.

The Very Best Cabenson FanFic there is

So I found this Fanfiction somehow when going down the rabbit hole of shipping Alex Cabot and Olivia Benson from "Law and Order: SVU" once again - and for me, it is THE Cabenson Fanfic. Nah, that's an understatement. It is such a beautifully written, touching, heartmelting story that I found myself reading it again and again. It's almost cathartic. The characters are just so well written and I love how their development both as individuals and as a couple is described in such a relatable, healthy way. This author really knows their stuff, folks!

Trigger warning for mentions of (past) sa, (internalized) homophobia and trauma/PTSD.

Title of Fic: "Stay"

Author:  elphiemolizbethbau

Fandom/Pairing: "Law and Order: SVU", Alex Cabot/Olivia Benson

Synopsis: Young, professionally scuessful ADA Alexandra Cabot feels herself drawn to Detective Olivia Benson. In a bad state, she one day surprisingly appears at Olivia's door and the two women slowly form a bond, their romantic feelings for each other growing stronger each day. But when they finally give in to their feelings, Liv soon finds Alex' erratic behavior quite puzzling and tries to get the younger woman to confide in her. Only when Alex reveals the horrific trauma she had to endure in her childhood and youth, the two women can truly start working at their relationship, with all the highs and lows, setbacks and challenges this involves.

Rating: M