Headcanon That Tawky Tawny Sometimes Sits Billy Down And Licks His Hair Cause That’s What Cats Do To

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

Superman, in the middle of a battle: *gets hit by a shard of kryptonite*

Batman: *grabs the shard and hands it to Captain Marvel*

Batman: “Captain! Get rid of this, quickly!”

Captain Marvel: *panics and eats the kryptonite*

Batman:

Captain Marvel:

Superman:

Captain Marvel: “I PANICKED OKAY???”

Superman: “SO YOUR FIRST THOUGHT WAS TO EAT IT???”

Batman: “Please tell me you don’t often eat things to get rid of them…”

Captain Marvel:

Captain Marvel: *turns around and flies back into battle*

“barbara gordon getting paralyzed for the sake of bruce wayne’s development was misogynist, but oracle is a better mantle for her and she should still be a wheelchair user.” i say into the mic.

the crowd boos. i begin to walk off in shame, when a voice speaks.

“she’s right,” they say. everyone turns to the 5th row, but no one is there. then on the screen behind me: barbara gordon herself.

duke thomas and cass cain being besties in the comics and also being doomed to be forgotten constantly by the fandom. they’re the real twins

I just came up with a really good idea for an angst filled Cassandra Cain fic but with how complicated it is it might be like 50k words or more and I’ve never even finished a fic let alone posted a fic before so it’s probably never going to happen.

Oh well, time to write a fic that will never see the light of day because of my perfectionism lol.

something about never being able to wash the blood off your hand

Original/reference under the cut

cover from ch 85 of witch hat atelier

THISSS! But imagine he just starts picking up even more cause of past champions and the gods in his head.

So Captain Marvel starts muttering phrases in dead languages and no one can keep track of it, probably not even Billy!

Billy slowly starts picking up just little common Spanish expressions that Rosa used often after living with them for a while. Batman’s conspiracy board on Marvel just got even larger.

Things I think Captain Marvel has done to make money (some are inspired by random posts I remember but can’t find)

Sells embarrassing photos of the JL to the younger superheroes

Sells kryptonite thrown at him to the Fawcett City black market where it’s bought and thrown at him again

Using his lightning to spell stuff out in the sky for other heroes anniversaries (price depends on the person paying)

YJ paid him to juggle all of them at once. Goes without saying it ended in disaster

His tooth was knocked out by Black Adam once and Billy sold it to Batman (Batman wanted to study Cap’s dna and Billy just went “money is money”)

Many of the sidekicks (current or former) have paid him to blow up their mentor’s mailbox with lightning and Billy, once again, went “money is money”

Took kids flying (for a fundraiser, but it still counts)

Paid to eat really hot peppers or anything difficult to eat in general

He did a little jig once for 20 bucks

Ok yes StephCass is my OTP and I do lean towards them not really being sexual but more based on intense codependency and stuff and like .. blah blah blah. TLDR I don't think it'd be possible to be a third in their relationship. But I think the idea of throwing Rose Wilson in is to funny not to bend my characterization of the Batgirls for.

You're Bruce. You fire this girl who was your Robin who's your son's girlfriend. Whatever.

They break up, great. She's not weighting your son down now.

... Hey why is she hanging out with Miss Perfect Weapon who you have dubious custody over?

Hey why is Miss Perfect Weapon's mom letting them share a bed?

... Hey is the black sheep son of your family making out with Rose Wilson?

Hey are they fucking dating now!?

... Nope they broke up

You're pretty sure Cassandra and Stephanie are a thing. Fuck.

Hey Rose is hanging out with the batgirls...

A lot....

... HEY HOW MANY OF YOUR KIDS EX'S IS CASSANDRA GOING TO COLLECT FOR HERSELF?!

red string of fate but on the other end is a worm on a string