So A Little About Me I'm A Huge My Hero Fan (and Anime In General), Use They/them, And Like To Game.

I thought suffering would make me beautiful. How catholic, how cathartic. Martyrdom, to die in blazing glory.

But it enduring pain only made it bigger. It seemed everlasting.

I thought it would make me less of a burden. Less human. More saint. And all saints are loved, and respected by all they sacrificed.

But no one remembers saints these days.

To be a sacrifice slaughtered by my own hand became so unfulfilling. It became dull, and pain is excruciating.

These days, I wonder what it means to endure, and what I want to endure, and why should life be made of painful endurances for me. Why I deserve punishment and nothing else.

These days, I want to endure joy until it breaks me, enough for me to reach into myself, remove the roots of the weeds that have spread all this hatred inside me, enough for this joy to be planted into my heart, and hopefully it will grow in me. Hopefully I can help it grow it others too.

I want love for all people, myself included, to be the only thing I ever endure.

Something about kirishima and bakugou being in love makes me so emotional. Even though it's just a ship, the fan works I see for it feel so authentic to me. I can imagine the relationship actually functioning and it makes me get sappy about the experiences I feel I missed out on being in the closet.

In conclusion, am I a repressed gay projecting onto fictional characters? Yes. Does that make them or the artists/writers any less precious to me? No.

villains are fine when they kill people I draw the line at being horrific parents though

It's honestly really sad to see what Pixar has to say about the possibility of queer characters or themes in Luca. Of course they never say anything especially problematic (Mickey Rat has got to keep making that pride merch money), but it hurts to see it directly dismissed. That there is nothing relating romance at all and it's just about "misfits".

Seeing companies like Disney control animation is depressing when it feels like minorities will always be sidelined so they can be edited out overseas. I want stories that acknowledge my existence, even in subtle ways, instead of being a dirty secret that fans gather crumbs online to prove.

This isn't to say that I still don't love the queer themes in Luca, or that the director's intention for the film isn't valid. I just want more.

No gender only lesbian

25000 likes!

Horrifying but also awesome

Three Houses and Three Ages; An analysis of the perspective of Time in the ideology of each Lord's Route

META ESSAY TLDR: Each house leader represents the idealized preference of a certain period of time; Claude is the Past, Dimitri is the Present, and Edelgard is the Future. Their routes enforce these time periods as what one should prioritize when making decisions, and what is most important when society is revolutionized.

Playing through Three Houses, it’s quite clear that each of the three main Lord routes is a unique story with more differences between them than which maps are cleared or what nation you fight for; each of the stories is rich with themes and symbolism asking questions to careful readers, and offering different solutions based on the ideals and values of the characters you choose to follow.

Many have suggested before some strong themes these routes carry, most notably the question of “Do the Ends justify the Means?”, and what place memories of the dead should have on the actions of the living. While these hold true on many levels of the story, it never seemed to fully encompass the whole of what the story had to say.

Reading more broadly across the entire text, I have come to think about their messages on a different alternative angle; that each route and lord is also representative of a method of thinking and decisions making that is based on their perspective of Time, ultimately asking the question of where you should look in time to decide what is right when the world is at the brink of revolution.

I propose that Claude, Dimitri, and Edelgard are each defined utterly by the answer they can be seen to represent; the Lessons of the Past, the Reality of the Present, or the Promise of the Future. 

Below, I will go into each character at length and provide specific evidence from the text for my proposal. This breakdown includes detailed spoilers for all routes*. 

Keep reading

I ship dis fellow and dis fellow. They are gay.

Call that a disfellowship

god when slavery, starvation, natural disasters, worldwide pandemic and suffering:

god when I am gay and trans my gender:

You’ve got to forgive yourself for being traumatized and needing to learn how to function again. 

Recovery isn’t always nightmares and depression, it’s forgetting to eat, being scared of what others might see as completely normal things, it’s getting random panic attacks, not knowing how to take care of yourself, not knowing how to live like an adult, even if you’re twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, of feeling like you’re failing to function in a world where everyone seems to have their shit together. 

If you need help, ask for it. Go to forums and ask for advice. Take advantage of community resources. Buy pre-sliced veggies and fruits, eat instant meals if you can’t cook for yourself today. Hire someone. Ask a neighbor for a favor. Buy any item you think might make life easier, even if you feel like you aren’t ‘disabled’ enough to have it. 

Some of the depression posts (ie open your windows, take a shower, go outside, call a friend) are really helpful but they’re not always enough. I’ve found advice for spoonies, people with chronic pain or other disabilities have the best tips because they know what it’s like to be bedridden, out of energy, stuck in a brain fog. 

You may never return back to the energy you had when you were younger and you might always need to use crutches to help you through life. It’s the same with medication. 

Trauma is a real thing that happens to you, it physically alters your brain and it’s alright to have lasting scars. 

You’re not broken, your life is not over and you can still be happy. 

It’s not your fault.