My Dearest L...

Car thoughts

My Dearest L...

How can I miss someone I’ve never met? I miss those soft eyes glancing up at me as the morning sun comes beaming through the window, I miss the feeling of your hands brushing over my delicate skin during the midnight hours in bed, I miss how you would keep the sheets warm at night when I’m cold. How can I miss these things when I haven’t even laid my eyes on you yet???

“Take a shower, wash off the day. Drink a glass of water. Make the room dark. Lie down and close your eyes. Notice the silence. Notice your heart. Still beating. Still fighting. You made it, after all. You made it, another day. And you can make it one more. You’re doing just fine.”

— Charlotte Eriksson

My Dearest L...

It’s time to driffed on into a dark slumber...

Japanese low-fi just hits different.

My Dearest L...

I have this smoking habit that I'm trying to stop, but then I don't know why I'd stop when we're all going to die one day. do I have to stop because I want a few long years to live or should I stop because I want to be old enough to see my grandchildren? then comes the question will I ever have grandchildren? I'm single right now, correction I have "someone" but I don't know how long it's going to last cause it a long-distance R-ship and everyone knows how they tend to go. My longest one was I think a year long. I know this is going to sound bad to me. but don't judge till you know the whole story boys and girls. but I have this boy I started seeing before covid and I was already in my online R-ship but this guy was here in my home town and he knew I had the online boyfriend but I am yet to tell my online boyfriend about him, not because I don't want him knowing I just don't know how he's going to act knowing I have 2 boyfriends and NO I'M NOT A PLAYER.....I'm just poly and my online boyfriend knows I am. but now the boy that lived close to me. went home to Mexico for x-mas and he has not come back, I talk to him everyday. he told me he'd be back at the beginning of Jan but now it's the middle of Feb and I have two online R-ships and I'm left cold and alone in bed at night in the....dark...with my panic attacks...and my nightmares...to suffer all alone...in a cold beddd.

I may think of you softly from time to time, but I swear I'll cut my hands off if they ever reach out for you again.

MY DEAREST L…

Hello, it's been a while and a few things have changed since we last spoke. I've decided to quit smoking for one. I'm not to sure how long it will last this time but I'm going to try my best to stop.

i know that your coming over this week. just hope that you can handle me being cranky hahah. but anyways i've just been chilling out. oh! yeah i've noticed that i can breath better actually now that i stopped smoking. i was short of breath all the time before but now i seem to be getting better.

a craving is hitting right now. i'm trying to just ignore it and wright throw the craving. anyways talk to you tomorrow.

Man do I have a story to tell you guys 🫣 I'll be working on it tonight, it should be posted soon.

My Dearest L...

I wake up on a normal day. Get out of bed and got use the bathroom then I head back to my room and lay on my bed, but lately, I’ve been waking up, and every time I stare at people my eyes tend to blur, and their faces deform almost as if I’m on LSD their eyes won’t be in the right place or their nose. Their head is all deformed, there like balloons. yet I find a strange comfort in knowing that people are not always what they tend to be. Sometimes people make people out to be things that there not and I don’t think it’s right...