I'll Take That As A Yes! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😇🙂☺️😉😌🤤😏😁🤭😋💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

Cute

Lestrade! My goodness, it's been so long! It's very nice to see you again and have you back here on Tumblr! How have you been in the meantime? And thank you for the compliment! I appreciate that! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘☺️😉😌😁🥳🤭🥹🥺✨👉🏻👈🏻

Trender: What’s a seahorses best sense?

No one: …

Trender: It’s their sight. Because they are a see-horse. They see.

Everyone else at the meeting table:

Slender: Why the hell are you here? What do you even do?

Trender: I bless you all with my presence, so don’t sass me, fuckhead.

Slenderman HC how to get him in the mood and how he gets his s/o in the mood, and what does he do if they say no?

Slender {NSFW mention}

Step 1: Sit on lap

Step 2: ???

Step 3: Profit.

He’s an easy man to please, and if his s/o sits on his lap while he’s working, he’ll give in real easily to the distraction.

Or he’ll pretend to shoo them away and then call them back.

Also, any thigh-high stockings really tend to capture his attention.

So, struct in his office with some nylons, and sit on his lap, wrap your arms around his neck and tell him how much you’ve missed him all day,  and he won’t be able to resist you.

He’s a romantic guy, so he’ll most likely kiss ass all day for an amazing night to follow.

But if it happens to be an unplanned thing, you can easily find his mood by his actions.

Light touches on your hips, a kiss on the neck that lasts a second too long, and hushed whispers about how he’ll treat you once you get some alone time.

He doesn’t beat around the bush too much when it comes to mentioning his needs.

If they say no, he’ll pout on his own for a little bit.

And maybe sulk at the window.

He’ll also be kind of petty,

“It’s not like I finished work early or anything-”

Just snide little comments that make you glare in his direction.

He shuts up quickly, after you do that, though.

He’ll just jerk one out to alleviate himself, although he’d much rather have you there with him to help.

Stingy flies! Yummy! Also I can't wait to keep learning from you how to deduce things! And thanks for the infos, they're not only needed but also moch appreciated! You really have no idea how much I've missed you, along with everyone else. The only thing left that I really miss is my old username, so yes, I do agree with you on the matter that the old username was better. 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😉😁🥺🥹😭😇😳😋🥳

Hey there Sherlock! I'm back! I hope you've been well and I hope you still keep up those awesome, braincell-revieving, scientific explainations about stuff like insects or arachnids like myself! 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😋🥳😉😁🥺🥹😳😭

I had noted your absence, and wondered where my second favourite arachnid had gone (the title of favourite arachnid still goes to @criminalisticonsultant, apologies). So your return is much appreciated. Welcome back, I had missed your questions and comments. But I will miss your old name, @shame-of-chimical. Reminiscent of better times. However, there have been some major changes during your absence. If you want to know more about it, I would advise you to read this post, some further information here, and if you have any more questions please direct them to my consulting assistant @veritassempervincit. But I do have some insects for you, as I have been bee watching last weekend.

And a very good one at that! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘😄😁😆😉😌☺️🤣😂💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

... I can't even send a gif? Boooring!

Fascinating that you have been testing it.

Are you bored or are you jealous of the new case I'm working on?

slender brothers in heat head canons? 💕

[NSFW]

Slender

With all of the stress built up, it's a wonder he even gets a heat at all.

But with all that stress, plus the sexual frustration of the heat, he tends to get a little angsty.

This leads to more sexual frustration since his s/o wouldn't be in the mood anymore.

He'll get uncharacteristically touchy with his s/o, maybe even a little rough at times.

Pulling you towards him with a firm hand, or a few tendrils squeezing you towards his towering figure.

Possessive, almost.

The use of his tendrils will become more active throughout the day, especially in bed.

Will probably choke you a lil ngl-

And while he's rutting into you, he'll coil the appanages around your thighs to spread them so he can hilt deeper in that pussy.

He tries to hold himself back during heat, but it's just so hard to ignore.

Especially if he' around his s/o alot, because his body is just screaming at him to fuck them here and now.

Slender has the third-longest heat.

Offender

Complete fucking animal.

If he doesn't have an s/o at the time, he'll probably knock up every woman in sight if he gets the chance.

With, uh, protection of course, to a degree.

That overwhelming urge to fill anyone up overcomes his self-control (no pun intended).

And this man can already go like 5+ rounds in a row, normally, so one can only imagine the lengths he would go to relieve himself of this desperate horniness.

While in the act, he's a little feral.

Growing, groaning, scratching, and biting is only half of the fun.

Don't expect any breaks as Offender is rutting into at inhuman speeds.

He tends to use his tendrils to his advantage, either using them to pin you down or hold your body closer to him.

He never tries to hold back in his heat, he's just so focused on fucking his cum into you, that he doesn't really think about anything else.

Offender's heat is the longest out of the four.

Trender

sUch A wHiNY lIl SHIt IsTG

If he has an s/o, their ear will be talked off from Trender complaining all morning.

He's jacked off at least 6 times in the first few hours of waking up.

And his dick is so hard and throbbing that it's literally painful.

He'll beg his s/o to help him achieve some release.

He doesn't expect them to help him throughout the whole day like, cough, some people.

He'll expect a few rounds but gladly accept more.

He gets really touchy-feely with his s/o, even out of the bedroom.

Just walking past you, he literally has to rake his hands along your thighs and bite/kiss your neck or he'll go insane.

If you lean back into his touch or touch him back, even just a hand on his arm, you'll get pounded on the kitchen counter.

He doesn't use his tendrils alot, but he doesn't have an issue using them when reminding you who's really in control.

His heat is the least aggressive, and it's more about just being horny all the time than seeking out someone to mate with.

Trender has the shortest heat.

Splendor

There's not a moment in his heat where his ears and/or cheeks aren't a deep shade of red.

He secludes himself to his room to try and relieve his pent up sexual tension.

Even in his sleep, he wakes up to find his hips rocking against the covers.

He hates to bother his s/o but he just needs this so bad.

Be careful if you let him go more than two rounds, cause then he starts to get a bit animalistic.

The raw, prolonged, mixture of passion and pleasure during his heat is enough to send him over the edge of rational thinking.

With his mouth split open to reveal some rather sharp teeth, he's not afraid to leave good-sized and bleeding love bites along your neck, breasts, thighs, and whatever else he can sink his teeth into.

He just needs you. He needs your body, he needs your love to ride out this heat.

He tries to be gentle, but when his emotions get the best of him Splendor can get rather unknowingly rough.

Pretty little claw marks also decorate your thighs next to the love bites.

Splendor has the second-longest heat.

Are you really that sure? 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️😉😄😁😆😏😌☺️😂🤣✨👀👉🏻👈🏻

How can you determine if a person is interesting as you are?

As I am? I don't know if- maybe Eurus? Usually, it's just interesting on a fuckability scale. Never placed myself in the equation. Seems... unfair to the others.

Slender Brothers and Female Beauty Practises Used in the Middle Ages!

What the Slender Brothers thought of beauty practices in Europe during the Middle Ages for Females. Inspired by Haus of Holbein from Six: The Musical XD 

Warnings: Well, Offender’s of course discusses rape so don’t read it if you know its going to make you uncomfortable. As a whole though, they all talk about pretty gross and painful sounding stuff. That’s what the practises for beauty were like at the time. That’s the whole topic. Basically though, if you’re cool watching Horrible Histories then these (Except Offenders) should be okay. 

~~~

Offenderman:

Man, your make-up, wigs and rat fur eyebrows are gonna get wiped off with him. This is not because he’s sloppy… its actually because he doesn’t like the taste. His mouth is gonna find itself in all sorts of places and he doesn’t need to be tasting hog grease on your face, no matter how good for your skin you might think it is! This includes if they used lead for makeup, arsenic, nightshade, lard, or anything else (for this reason, Offender actually avoided much accidental poisoning that way. Of course, this man poisons himself anyway with other drugs). Hair extensions would also go. He did get excited though when he, uh, caught a girl having her late night / before bed routine with blood on her face, though. Like when you get a box of cornflakes and theirs coco pops in there instead.

He was and still is pretty fascinated with corsets though.

Slenderman:

Don’t take this as Slender being ‘ahead of the time’, but the moment he left his forest for a moment and saw women replacing their eyebrows with rat fur and using pee to lighten their hair, he was out of there. No, no. Absolutely not. That’s disgusting and ridiculous. He goes home in disgust and then he laughs his ass off (Cruelly). Like I said, this doesn’t mean Slender was ahead of the time (None of them were or are. They can do their own research, but that can only lead them to be as forward as the rest of the world is- they’re telepathic, not psychic), it just means he was judgmental and thinks the only valid image of beauty is his own. “No Splender I’m not leaving this forest, there are people out there who pluck their hairlines away until they look like what emerges from a hens vagina. With a face.”  

Splenderman:

Splender has been around humans for so long and he pays so much attention (Not out of creepiness- out of care) that he is well aware of the state a human body should be in if it’s healthy and comfortable and how it definitely should not look if it is healthy and comfortable. This means that when people started getting sick and losing the ability to walk too early in life after they started using certain beauty practises, he knew exactly what to blame. And he, of course, tried to warn people when the topic came up and made his views on these things clear to people he knew, these things were kinda… normal?? You know? There wasn’t much he could do. People would just brush him off. Folks always complain about new things, that doesn’t mean they’re bad! Right?

This normalcy barrier though, did not stop our man from being a legit vigilante by night and making sure that various X-Ray clinics (These would be used for hair removal. You got stuck under the X-Ray machine for up to a day and it got rid of your hair… but it also, of course, destroyed your skin) and small cosmetics factories that put arsenic and deadly night shade in their products would shut down. He did this by stealing their equipment and materials and getting rid of it. Splender’s awesome.

Trenderman:

Of course, Trender is a fashion plate and he has always appreciated mortals’ sense of style and art, but he isn’t obsessive about sticking to the trends. He likes to do his own thing, you know? As a rule, he has always backed up his practises with science and his own experience with them, so I’m not gonna lie here. Some of the practises used during the Middle Ages did concern him a bit, aha. Such as the use of radiation for skin care and various poisons (Lead, arsenic, deadly nightshade). He would also take shoes very seriously with anyone he was dressing up for events and have them promise to him that they would excuse themselves from their party or whatever they were attending, for a bit and take off super high heels or too small slippers to let their feet breath and sit normally for a little while. He would go as far as to tell them horror stories about people who didn’t listen to him and couldn’t walk after the age of forty, or got seriously disgusting feet looking feet, or even had to have them chopped off. Yeah, Trender took it seriously.

Using mercury, though (Unfortunately), is not one of the things that concerned him. After the 1800’s, when Trender finally did fall seriously ill from the substance (It took him a while due to his superior immune system), he did of course immediately regret all of his work with it and halted its use in any of his practises. Its one of his biggest regrets. He used to recommend it so often to clients… and friends… and he can’t take any of that back. These days though he’s very current and aware to a genius extent on the subject of what’s healthy in the way of cosmetics. He doesn’t play with it at all.

87 + 107? with mycroft? please?

Pairing: Mycroft Holmes x ReaderFandom: BBC SherlockWarnings: /Genre: fluff ; humor

Summary: “My family wants to meet you.” + “What are you smiling for?”

A/N: thank you my love (added mycroft to my fandoms page) (NO MORE PLEASE, ONLY FINISHING THOSE IN MY INBOX)

                                                        *****

Youlooked up from the file in front of you, when the door to your officegot opened and smiled at Mycroft, “Well, well.. to what do I owethe pleasure?”

“Areyou busy?”

“No more than usual,” you leaned back in your chair and watched himtake a seat across from you, “What is it?”

Mycroftlooked nervous. And that wasn’t something you were used to and itmade you nervous as well.

“Rememberhow we discussed not making our relationship public, due to workrelated issues and also my family?”

“Yes?”

“Sherlockhas found out about it.”

Youdrew your eyebrows together, but were still calm, “How?”

“Ithink he might have gone through my phone the last time he was here.Anyways, when we were at my parents’ place last weekend, he suddenlystarted talking about it. Told them everything there was to knowabout you.”

“He did what?”

Weiterlesen

SlenderMan x Female!Reader

This fic was written based on this amazing piece of art. Thank you for allowing me to write about your artwork @zombiebooty

This forest had a history. An old, evil history and it clung to the trees like moss. The moment you crossed the treeline, you felt it settle on your skin like a cold blanket.

This was stupid. Reckless. Mad.

But you wanted to prove everyone wrong. The creature in these woods may be something evil, but surely it wanted more than death and chaos. You followed the path that winded through the trees. The light from your torch gave little guidance. It was like the forest was consuming the brightness from your torch. Continuing you down, you finally came across a page. The sketch was just like you saw in the history books, the websites too. They always warned people not to take them down. And those that did, usually ended up joining the memorial by the forest entrance. You reached out and, instead of ripping it from the tree, you merely stroked the page. Careful of the fragile paper, damaged by the wind and recent rain.

Weiterlesen