Squid’s Laws Of Fic (not Inclusive)

squid’s laws of fic (not inclusive)

first law: write the fic you wish to see in the world aka goddammit do I have to do everything myself around here

second law: it’s going to be longer than you think. much longer. hahaha so long. why are you crying

third law: the time spent writing is inversely proportional to the amount of smut present, dammit

fourth law: flesh out your secondary characters. make them real people. have them take over. oh god. put them back. somebody please help

fifth law: the time spent researching canon is directly proportional to the amount of time you’ll spend altering your plot. that one person on the internet

sixth law: the time spent researching in general will eclipse the time you spend writing. the nsa agent monitoring your internet search history is curled up in a corner. his boss wants to know if you’re a threat. “I don’t know,” the agent sobs. “I just really don’t know.”

seventh law: at some point, someone will ask what your favorite hobby is. you will feign a heart attack to get away

15 Reasons Why Monica Geller Is An Unappreciated Character

1: Fed all of her friends almost every day for ten years without complaining.

2: Excelled in a traditionally masculine career, (yes, cookery as a profession is generally male-dominated) and in traditionally masculine hobbies (football), without compromising her femininity or sexuality.

3: At the same time, revelled in traditionally female interests such as babies, marriage and housework without apologizing for them, or suggesting they made her inferior or weak.

4: Overcame teenage obesity.

5: Grew up in an emotionally abusive home, with a mother who subjected her to relentless criticism and verbal mistreatment….But still emerged with a sense of her own self-worth, determination to fulfil her dreams and huge capacity to care for others.

6: Stayed friends with her brother who bullied her as a child, and contributed to said-emotionally abusive home. Didn’t blame him for her mistreatment or show resentment towards him.

7: Took former best friend – who abandoned and rejected her for a ‘high society’ life – into her home without question.

8: Prior to this, accepted a woman who had previously lived on the streets, as her roommate and welcomed her into her group of friends.

9: Went through unemployment and shitty jobs, but refused to take unfair advantages she hadn’t earned (i.e. Pete buying her a restaurant). Eventually gained a prestigious head chef position based entirely on her own merit.

10: Walked away from the man she thought was the love of her life, because she wanted children and he’d only have them to make her happy. Even though that option would have been 100 times less painful for Monica, she knew that wasn’t fair on him and refused.

11: After marrying the actual love of her life, she waited until Chandler was ready to have kids, because she knew about his fears of raising children. When they discovered virtually the only option for children was sperm donor-ship (so they’d be her kids but not his), she refused and insisted on adoption.

12: Was also the one-woman cheerleading team for the aforementioned love of her life, in telling him he could be the amazing boyfriend, husband and father that he never saw in himself. Was proved 100% right.

13: Resisted her control-freak coping mechanisms to give Chandler the power of making the big decisions about their future, (saying ‘I Love you’, moving in together, marriage), so he could work through his commitment phobia. Again, proved it was 100% worth it.

14: Encouraged her husband to quit a job he hated, then supported him – financially and emotionally –through his subsequent unemployment and helped him find his dream career.

15: Never, ever fucking gives up on anything or anyone.

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