The Thing All Sherlock Holmes Adaptations Get Wrong Is Making The Guy An Irredeemable Asshole Who Treats

And yet, some will still claim: “The protests are antisemitic!”

Stars

I used to dream with stars until I met one

Do you think soldiers of L'manburg still remember Tommy as this war hero and meet at a bar and go:

"Yo I saw the general and I heard he came back to life and also killed that Green Guy two times and is good friends with the riches people of the server and the Angel of Death"

"I saw him being under the protection of a machine the warden created"

"Holy shit I heard he has a pet spider!"

"A big one?"

"MASSIVE DUDE!"

Tommy "i am so traumatised my therapist has trauma" innit but all the Slodiers only see their General that won L'manburg its freedom and are in awe of everything he does

"I heard he committed to peace now. Refusing to use the most dangerous weapons and only using low quality ones"

"And he STILL kills mobs easily!"

"I heard he is childhood friends with a powerful demon..."

"Isn't the murderous fairy of the woods also fond of him?"

"Damn."

"I saw the Angel of Death promising his aid to him..."

"You mean the guy that blew our nation up?" "Yeah"

"Mf our General is a madman! (Affectionately)"

They end up exchanging stories about how kind and badass Tommy is

Soldier 1: "He offered me some carrots when I passed by"

Soldier 2: "I heard he isn't that well of rn tho..."

Solider 1, starts crying: "He shared despite not having much himself??!!"

When the rest of the world looks at the united states right now, we see a government who sends billions to support genocide but cannot help their own people starving on the streets.

We see a police force who won't go in to save children from school shootings, but deploy at a rapid rate to arrest peaceful protestors using their right to free speech to protest a genocide

America, you are a war mongering snake eating your own tail. You will protect and support war criminals in another country but let your own people starve and die

To the students bravely protesting now, we see your strength. We see what we saw when students protested the Vietnam War. We have faith you will prevail

congratulations to mr holmes for finally marrying dr watson 🎉🎉🎉

sherlock gets bored between cases (lonely, mrs hudson thinks, but he scoffs when she tells him so), and he starts tinkering with things around the flat. even though he makes a mess, she generally doesn’t mind because when he’s done pulling things apart, he usually puts them back together again, mostly in the right order. and on occasion things even end up put together a little better than before. the latch on the sitting room door no longer sticks. the tap in the bath no longer drips. the door on the oven no longer squeaks.

but then lestrade calls while the pieces of the kitchen lamp are still strewn across the table and the worktop, while dark wires still snake down from the ceiling, precarious and ready to bite. sherlock’s only halfway done with the tinkering and not at all done with the putting back together, but there’s a case, and it’s a beautiful one–a body in a place it wasn’t meant to be, a piece of evidence that leads them in a circle rather than in a straight line to a suspect, a motive, an arrest–and sherlock has no interest in the inner workings of kitchen lamps when he has the inner workings of a murder to pull apart instead. 

it takes days to even begin to solve, and every time mrs hudson comes up to dust or to trade out a fresh sandwich for the untouched one she’d left the day before, she presses the switch out of habit and is greeted by a shower of angry golden sparks. sherlock holmes, she demands around the drum of her heart against her fragile ribs, but he’s too caught up in the labyrinth of the case, in the sticky mire of his own head to even hear her. so she does what any sensible landlady would do when faced with the aftermath of a bored consulting detective: she gets a man in. 

she plucks his name out of the telephone directory because she knew a watson once, and he was a solid and dependable sort. when she phones, the voice on the other end of the line is a little distant, a little sad perhaps, but cordial enough, and he agrees to come round today if she doesn’t mind that it might not be until late. she tries to warn sherlock, but she’s sure he hasn’t heard. at least with a case on, there’s only a slim chance he’ll be sheet-clad when the electrician arrives–they don’t need a repeat of the plumber incident. still, she thinks, the fright would serve sherlock right for leaving her kitchen in such a state. nevertheless, when the man knocks on the door at half four, she leads him upstairs herself, sure to step in all the places that squeak, to knock, to open the door slowly so sherlock isn’t caught unaware. she half-expects him to still be nearly catatonic in his chair, knees tucked up under his chin, a habit that makes him look so endearingly young. but instead she finds him at the window, the afternoon light warming his skin and streaking the dark smudge of his hair with fiery mahogany. oh, sherlock dear, she says as the electrician limps up the last of the stairs, this man’s here to see about the–

sparks. 

the word slips out of john watson’s mouth on a whisper of breath as he stutters to a stop in the doorway. mrs hudson’s brow wrinkles, yes exactly, that’s what… she turns back to sherlock to find him similarly frozen and wide-eyed, a gentle blush blossoming in his cheeks. …i was going to… and back to john just as he starts to come back to himself, pulling his shoulders back and his spine up straighter, looking almost as if he doesn’t even need the cane in his hand.

right, she says, the hint of a smile curling around the word. i’ll just… she slips around john watson, throwing a glance back over her shoulder as sherlock flutters into motion, hurrying off toward the kitchen and offering to clear away some of the mess gathered there. her feet are light on the steps as she continues back down to her flat, the grin across her mouth growing bolder. she shuts her door tight and turns up the telly.

sherlock holmes and john watson. 

sparks indeed.

In South America, after Cas says "I love you", Dean says "and I you, Cas".

If the reciprocation was in the original script and the CW cut it off cause they decided to go with that shitty ending, this is the proof. They forgot to tell their homophobic plans to SouthAmerican countries.

Fuck off homophobic CWUSA. We win.

“The Proof is in the Soup”

A slightly different take on that chicken soup scene in Releves. For @messy-scandinoodle

Hannibal generally isn’t one to argue with himself. He knows his own mind, he knows what he hopes to achieve, and he knows how to either get what he wants or how to adjust any situation so that it is more advantageous to getting what he wants. If he doesn’t get what he wants, he can still at least amused by the process.

Except…

There is now the Will Graham issue to contend with.

Where Will Graham is concerned, Hannibal does find himself second-guessing some of his choices. There are too many choices, or not enough of them. Hannibal wants certain outcomes more than others, and he doesn’t think he’ll be satisfied with just amusement at the process.

So as he prepares the soup he intends to bring to Will’s bedside table, Hannibal wonders how best to approach a recipe he’s recreated many times.

Should I leave the dates whole, or chop them? Might they infuse the broth with too much sweetness? What if Will doesn’t like dates?

Have you thought of that?

And the star anise…surely Will  knows not to eat them. Perhaps you should remove them after they’ve imparted their flavor.

Even on the way to the hospital, with the soup done and packed in its carrying case, Hannibal frets over how best to introduce the meal.

Make it sound artistic and complex. Impress him with the exotic components, like a composer showing off rare instruments.

But what if he sees the truth? What if he sees your true intentions?

He won’t. He’ll be dazzled by the ingredients.

In the hospital room, Will stirs from sleep as soon as Hannibal begins unpacking the meal.

“Smells delicious,” he says, hair tousled and eyes still drowsy.

“Silkie chicken in a broth,” Hannibal explains. He decides on a small history lesson. “A black-boned bird prized in China for its medicinal values since the seventh century. Wolfberries, ginseng, ginger, red dates, and star anise.”

Will’s eyebrows go up. A cartoon light bulb practically goes on over his head.

“You made me chicken soup?”

Hannibal freezes in place. His inability to respond lasts only a split second, but it feels like ages. His mind screams at him.

HE KNOWS. WILL GRAHAM KNOWS WHAT YOU’VE DONE. HE HAS SEEN THROUGH YOUR ARTISTIC RUSE.

Time slows to a crawl, nearly stops entirely.

YOU FOOL. YOU FOOLISH FOOL.

Will’s expression bores into him like a tunneling electron microscope, ferreting out the purest essence of the truth.

HE KNOWS YOU HAVE MADE FOR HIM THE NUMBER ONE ILLNESS REMEDY MADE FOR LOVED ONES SINCE TIME IMMEMORIAL. CHICKEN SOUP! CHICKEN SOUP! WHEN YOU LOVE SOMEONE, YOU MAKE THEM CHICKEN SOUP!!!!

Hannibal forces himself to remain outwardly calm and waits for time to begin moving again.

“Yes,” he finally says, his tone curt.

CHANGE THE SUBJECT, YOU FOOL.

“The nurses tell me you’ve been wandering, Will,” he says, and hopes the burning he feels inside cannot be seen from the outside.

(end)

The Karakura Gang only knew the Ichigo's Urahara, the guy who bowed in apologies to their friend and is always helping. And the new shinigami generation most know him as Ichigos's mentor. And after two wars and so many rebellions Urahara is respected and look up. The old shinigami generation still confused how that happened. Urahara is the most confused.

I could see that. Urahara has all these teenagers/younger generation of Shinigami hanging out in his shop every day, and whenever one of the Gotei 13 stop by, they just… don’t get it. Like, this is Urahara, practically a sociopath in some ways, with more blood on his hands than most people they know and a tendency for not-strictly-legal experiments, and they don’t understand why Ichigo and co. just don’t seem to get it. Maybe they don’t know. So Rukia and Renji get warned, and they mention it to Ichigo, but from Renji’s experience, all he really knows of Urahara is the guy calling him a freeloader all the time and making him stock shelves and do chores, and it’s annoying but not exactly evil. And yeah, Urahara placed the Hogyoku in Rukia, but the guy apologized, maybe because Ichigo made him, but things turned out fine in the end, and the fact that he listens to Ichigo at all is a sticking point for her. Ichigo makes her want to strangle him sometimes, but he’s got a good eye for people, for who they are on the inside, and he makes them loyal, makes them better, and if Urahara’s willing to follow Ichigo’s lead, then she thinks she can at least trust him not to deliberately throw them into the deep end again.

The others - Ishida, Chad, Inoue - they witnessed Urahara apologizing to Ichigo. And they didn’t know a lot about him, but even they could tell that behind the jokes and sly smiles and collected calm was enough pride that the man wouldn’t bow to just anyone. But the guy knelt and bowed and apologized to Ichigo, tossed his pride aside and let a teenager judge him, the last thing any of them expected him to do, and a man like that probably deserves at least a second chance. Besides, Ichigo forgave him, so it seems kind of pointless for any of them to hold a grudge. Even to Ishida, Urahara’s mostly okay for a Shinigami. At least he’s not Kurotsuchi.

And Ichigo. Ichigo didn’t really expect Urahara to admit he was in the wrong either. He didn’t seem the type. If he did fuck up, he seemed the sort to gloss over it and try to fix it and possibly fuck up some more, but not apologize for any of it, much less put himself out there like he did for Ichigo when he didn’t even expect Ichigo to forgive him. So whatever, Urahara kind of screwed them over a bit, screwed Rukia over a lot, but it’s not like he didn’t help them too, as much as he could, and Ichigo figures so long as he doesn’t do it again, he can let bygones be bygones. And it turns out, Urahara mostly doesn’t do it again. He helps them through war and a fuck-ton of rebellions and invasions and almost-end-of-the-worlds, he never asks for anything in return, and he’s always willing to lend them a hand or teach them something they don’t know. He never sides with the Gotei 13, always with them, and that’s worth more than Ichigo can say. Even Shinji and the others hopped back into the Gotei 13 as soon as they could. Urahara stayed. That’s worth a lot in Ichigo’s books. Yeah, he ignored him just like all the others in those two years Ichigo lost his powers, which was incidentally also partially Urahara’s fault, but he was also the one who came up with a way to restore them, and by that point, Ichigo’s fond enough of him that there’s actually fairly little he wouldn’t forgive the guy for.

He gets hints of Urahara’s past throughout their acquaintance, and the older generation of Shinigami eventually tell him more through Rukia and Renji, but to Ichigo, it’s the present that matters, it’s what Urahara does now that matters, and what he does now is help, no matter what the situation is, no matter the time, and he’s always solidly in their corner, even more than the Visored or Ichigo’s own dad. Urahara’s a friend at this point, and Ichigo is notorious for fighting anyone who fucks with his friends.

For his part, Urahara doesn’t know when his shop became central station for the spiritually aware population of Karakura. The place is a lot busier these days, he gets Ichigo and his friends doing their homework at his dining table, Abarai-san comes down once in a while and grumbles his way through “budgeting all his shit properly”, and Rukia tags along and regularly buys Chappy merchandise from him even though he knows there are perfectly good stores in Seireitei that sell the same things.

Ichigo most of all comes over for tea, often (Ichigo makes the tea too). Sometimes he stays for dinner, and Urahara finds himself enjoying his company. They don’t even talk about Shinigami issues most of the time, and they don’t run out of conversation.

(Eventually, when they’re in Seireitei and some random Shinigami - old enough to remember the rumours of what Urahara Kisuke was infamous for - makes a snide comment and sneers and trashtalks him to his buddies, well, Urahara doesn’t care. He’s heard worse, and it’s not entirely an undeserved reputation. But Ichigo takes exception, because who the fuck does this guy think he is, acting like he has the right to judge one of Ichigo’s people when he’s willing to bet the asshole has never exchanged a single word with Urahara? The bastard keeps talking, and between one blink and the next, Ichigo’s punted him through a wall, Eleventh Division style, hard enough that he’ll be in the Fourth for a while. Inoue blinks after the guy and very pointedly doesn’t offer to heal him, Ishida sniffs disdainfully and mutters contemptuously about Shinigami, and Chad flashes his arm at one of the idiots who looks like they want to try taking them on. He changes his mind quickly.

They proceed to drag an utterly bemused Urahara out of there. Later, he finds out Rukia and Renji managed to get the group demoted as well. It’s a novel experience for him, having people defend him, even when he doesn’t need it.)