The Haunting Is A Bad Dream

Source: @jeanpsychologist

like a lion, like a lamb

Find me in the pohutukawa deep, I am running water chuckling as the sunlight plays piano-soft on stone loved smooth, a touch longer -

the melody of promise on curves that bloom like love in springtime in passerine praise flitting delicate amongst the boughs, a poorly kept secret, this beauty in you and I am hiding still beyond the berry brambles, past the ferny hollow marked by years of almost grown fallen in the arms of history

I am here  a zephyr’s whisper against your salty cheek a memory, always was and will be

here, come find me

Devin Kelly, All that wanting, right?

beep beep sometimes when you have been in survival mode for a long time the parts of you dedicated to Wanting Things atrophy and you forget how to envision a future that feels rewarding because you are busy with the business of staying alive, and it can seem like your life must be pointless because you can’t imagine any long term goals. sometimes even when you leave survival mode you can’t remember how to Want Things. that doesn’t mean you need to give up on having a good and fulfilling life, it just means that Wanting Things is a muscle you need to gradually strengthen. the part of you that has dreams and aspirations is still there, it just fell asleep, but if you wiggle it enough it can and will regain feeling. it’s okay to start small

i know i've like, technically made progress in the past week or so by taking more initiative in taking care of myself and my living space, but it doesn't feel satisfying at all bc i don't have anyone constantly praising me for doing shit a mentally stable person does without even having to think about it. like even just going to the store or making myself food is a monumental task for me, as is everything else, and i just wish people recognized how much ridiculously harder i have to try than them to accomplish the same things. like i'm literally disabled, i have diagnosed disabilities, but bc no one considers them "real" disabilities, no one cares. it's exhausting, to constantly have to put so much effort into doing so little. everything is so hard, even the things that are supposed to be easy. is it really asking so much to want at least a little praise or encouragement for it?

jinxing things isn't real. things either go well or they don't, and while you can never fully guarantee they'll go well, the chances improve along with your confidence and diligence. so, what i'm trying to say is, things are most likely to go well when you believe they will and do everything in your power to ensure that it does. things are most likely to go poorly when you believe they will and do nothing to try to change your predicted outcome, perhaps even self-sabotaging to ensure it. assuming all outcomes will be negative from the start and preemptively giving up is the real "jinx," as it is the only way to ensure a 100% chance of failure!

it can be tempting to avoid expressing hope for fear of being disappointed, but in forbidding yourself from even hoping things will go well, you inadvertently create self-fulfilling prophecies. of course, some things will always wind up going horribly, but if you keep your hopes up and keep at it, some things are bound to go wonderfully, too. start telling yourself things will go well, and see where it gets you. prepare for the worst if you must, but always hope for the best. it can be hard at first, but try to let yourself cross your fingers once in a while.

The land of Palestine is our home, the blood of its people is our blood. The tears of its children are our tears, and their longing of freedom for Palestine is our longing. We may not live in Palestine, but Palestine lives in us.

#savepalestine #savesheikhjarrah

It is our duty as feminists to protect and respect women in Hijabs