That Summer.

Night

Eiji asking to hold Ashs gun when they first met was a metaphor for consent.

Banana Fish fic recs

It feels like it's been years since I posted one of these; my bad

Almond Milk: Barista Sing falls for a haughty new customer. Rating: General Audiences

Chaos Theory: Ash's posthumous impact on the people who cared about him. Rating: Teen Audiences

Dusk Til Dawn: Howl's Moving Castle AU. Fun Fact: I watched HMC for the first time, just so I could read and understand this fic, and it was worth it. Rating: Teen Audiences

golden fly-boy: Eiji makes it to the Olympics, with Ash by his side. Rating: Teen Audiences

The Hands of a lover, and other synonyms for comfort: Ash may not be able to define his relationship with Eiji, but he knows that it doesn't hurt. Rating: Teen Audiences

If you'll return to my side: After breaking up with Eiji, Ash goes to Max and Jessica for advice. Rating: General Audiences

porgi, amor, qualche ristoro: While enjoying the winter holidays in Izumo, a commercial triggers bad memories for Ash. Rating: Mature (mentions of Ash's past trauma/CSA, description of severe anxiety attack)

Postcards: Ash Lynx is dead; Eiji starts recieving random postcards from him. Rating: Mature (mentions of past abuse/assault, graphic depictions of violence). I highly recommend subscribing to Special Agent Rick Henry, FBI, which is this fic's companion piece, written from Ash's perspective.

The Song of a Dull Knife: a jet-lagged Eiji rushes to visit Ash in the hospital. Rating: Teen Audiences

What Is and What Can Never Be: The only way to save Eiji is for Ash Lynx to die, and Ash knows it. Rating: Teen Audiences (not as sad as it sounds, I swear)

Previous List

Make sure to check all tags before reading these; I try to give summaries so that you know what you're getting into, but double check. And if you can, give a comment/Kudos for any fics you liked. Enjoy!

Bonus: here's some official art to cry over

Me when I purposefully consume media that will damage my mental health:

Through all the madness of falling in love ...

Speedpaint and image ID below the cut!

[ID: A digital painting with an atmosphere similar to the second ending of the anime Banana Fish. The camera is from Ash's perspective, watching Eiji, who is facing the sun. However, unlike in the RED ending where Ash is in Eiji's shadow, Eiji is holding Ash's hand and leading him toward the light, through the rye field. END ID]

[ID: A timelapse of the previous painting being drawn digitally, with no audio. END ID]

At the bar

ash lynx / mike waters (river phoenix)

made me think of them.

Summer of 85

behind the scenes of hirokazu kore-eda's monster (2023)