Rat-bitch-kins-the-fae - RatBitchKinsTheFae

some self aftercare tips for doms and subs!

don't put lotion on contact or rope burns, ointment first.

water will help, but juice has immediate sugar that can help with numbness or faintheaded issues, try not to exhert too much.

any sort of small salt based snack can help with nausea if climaxes are a bit too intense! nerves cross and it's a lot, it happens!

please don't chug liquids after this stuff, slow and steady will reguster better

have you taken meds? some people think about it most now, when the feelings are settling and a bit intense.

work out your hands, the amount of pressure in your hands can be the thing making the rest of you ache.

new clothes might help!

put something familiar on, music, a podcast, a show

take some deep breaths. if you have no one else with you, positive affirmations can feel very healing as self aftercare.

hi any life advice for 21yo

Don't date thirty-year-olds until you are at least 25.

Having a glass of water for every glass of alcohol will give you a 50% reduction in hangover viciousness.

Bad people will use your willingness to be quiet as a weapon against you. If someone's being awful to you and trusting you'll be quiet to keep from making waves, surprise them.

There is no physical object in the world that is worth as much as your honor.

Honor is not the same as dignity. Retaining one sometimes means leaving the other aside.

Don't have any sex you don't want to have; have as much as you want of the sex that you do, whether that's a lot, a little, or none at all. Nothing you can do to your own body is immoral, unless you're doing it as an act of self-punishment.

Food is morally neutral. You do not have to earn the right to eat calories. Fat and sugar keep your brain from eating itself.

Learning to sit still and breathe--in, in, in, hold, hold, hold, out, out, out, out, out, out--can give you five feet of clear space around yourself in a maelstrom.

Find out how to make three good meals: A comfort meal you can make for just yourself relatively easily, a fancy meal you can use to wow a date, and a meal you can feed a bunch of people. All the other cooking can come later, but you can build a community on those three meals.

If you ever get to the point that things are so bleak you can see no other way forward but to die, make any other choice. If that means leaving everything you own and being a beach bum, or quitting your career, or taking up or leaving a religion, or deciding to bicycle across the country, so be it; living means more chances, dying means everything stops and you don't get to see any more interesting things. As you have not yet seen all the things that can interest you, it is better to live.

the problem with having a decade old tumblr blog is that there are posts on it from a decade ago

ive seen a lot of people talk about after care on here but only mention it to the extent of some cuddles and a bath and i just want to remind everyone that aftercare shouldnt be limited to that.

if you have a harder session, tend to your subs bruises, scratches, and marks. put ice on bruises and welts to help with inflammation and pain.

if you do bondage, take care of rope burn and help them do some stretches. their body is going to be stiff from being restricted in one position for a long time. also a heating pad can help with sore muscles.

if they have any cuts or are bleeding, dress their wounds properly. make sure to put on antibiotic ointment on before a bandage if needed.

if they have burns for whatever reason, run them under cold water and maybe use ointment on those to help them heal.

make sure they pee after sex to help prevent a UTI. their legs may be shaky so help them get to the bathroom if needed.

give them advil or some other pain med to help with any aching or discomfort.

make sure they drink water. they need it and i cant stress how important this is. also give them some food even if its just a little snack.

give them verbal assurance and praise. tell them they did good and that youre proud of them.

still run a bath, get them cleaned up, give them kisses, cuddle them, etc but dont forget about the rest of aftercare, its so important. take care of your subs and always remember consent, communication, and safety are key.

also give your doms aftercare and affection too, theyre people with emotions and need it

aftercare is just as, if not more, important than the actual scene and should never be skipped, rushed, or disregarded

this girl at uni was dressed sooo gay and then i found out she's just straight with a lesbian mom. dykebaiting is not a victimless crime 😔

Heya my DIY friends: You do not transition faster or get more manly/feminine by using more than your effective dose of HRT. It's an 'on' switch on puberty, not a speed dial. A lower dose will slow it down (kinda) but you can not make a puberty go faster or further by taking more and more. It has an unmovable maximum speed.

Folks on estrogen: if you're not getting all the results you want, consider whether adding progesterone and/or testosterone-blockers are right for you. Combi therapy might take you further than constantly upping the E dose. Each medication has its own risks and side effects so read up before you start.

Folks on testosterone: taking too much actually makes you transition slower 'cause your body converts excess T back into E. The only thing you might speed up that way is balding. Sorry guys, dial it back a bit and you might actually see more results.

Reminders for new ao3 users (in no particular order):

- filter your searches like you would on a library website or in an online catalogue

- don’t post placeholders, fic searches, or recommendations as fics. DON’T! It’s against ao3 TOS

- there is no algorithm. ao3 sorts by date posted/updated unless you filter with specific search criteria

- ao3 is a non profit. that means it doesn’t sell ads to make money — it only survives on donations. this is why it can show you so many fics without ever flashing an ad or pop up at you!

- report fics that break TOS when you see them (I.e., placeholder fics, searches) to help other users navigate better

- the tag “dead dove, do not eat” doesn’t equate to gore/awfulness automatically. it is a complementary tag that enhances current tags. E.g., if the fic is tagged “gore” and “dead dove, do not eat” the author really wants you to mind the gore tag

- most fandoms have a variation of “no beta, we die like (x character)” and they all link back to the “No beta” tag

- publishing a new fic sometimes means it won’t show up in the fandom/pairing tag for a few minutes

- subscribers receive update emails at different times, depending on when you update/publish your fic. there’s no good way to predict when an e-mail will be sent — it can be in 30 seconds, or two hours later

- some fics are restricted by authors to those with ao3 accounts only. if you see a blue lock in the upper right corner, that fic is only visible to logged in ao3 users

- you can block commenters now! this didn’t use to be a thing

- updating a fic just to stay at the top of the pairing tag/fandom tag is a dick move. unless you’re legitimately editing or adding chapters, this just annoys readers and fellow authors, and people will skip over your fic

evil Winnie the Pooh: I could go for a few smackerels of blood right now

reminder for y'all that liking oral sex and being willing to perform it aren’t requirements for being attracted to women.

you don’t have to like giving oral to be a lesbian.

you don’t have to like giving oral to be a multisexual who is attracted to women.

you don’t even have to like giving oral to be a straight man.

you are not required to like oral sex or to perform oral sex in order to “prove” that you’re “actually” attracted to women. for that matter, you are not required to enjoy or to be willing to perform any sex act in order to “prove” that you’re actually any sexuality or to “prove” that you’re actually attracted to anyone.

it’s okay to not like sex at all, no matter what your orientation is. and it’s okay to just not like specific sex acts. you aren’t obligated in any way, shape, or form to have any kind of sex you don’t like for any reason and you’re especially not obligated to have sex you don’t enjoy because there are people out here trying to say you’re not actually your sexuality if you’re not willing to have certain kinds of sex—none of this suddenly becomes untrue just because the sex act we’re talking about is performing oral sex on a woman.

it’s no less gross for a woman to try and pressure you into performing a sex act you don’t enjoy and don’t want to perform than it would be for someone of any other gender identity to do so and it’s not okay for a woman to tell you that you’re “not really a lesbian/not really bi/not really whatever” if you’re not willing to perform certain sex acts on her or on any other women. these things are sex shaming, manipulative, and abusive no matter who they’re coming from.

please remember that you’re allowed to have sexual preferences no matter what your orientation is. you’re allowed to say no to certain sex acts and have that respected. no one of ANY gender identity has the right to shame you for that or try to pressure you into performing sex acts you don’t want to perform. no one of ANY gender identity or sexuality has the right to deny your orientation based on your sexual preferences.

what is it with able bodied people saying “get well soon” after you say that you’re chronically ill?? like? i am not gonna? and i once literally responded with “i’m not gonna, it’s chronic, as in permanent.” and they went like “oh well, hope you get better!” like bro 💀