Happy Mother’s Day To That Mom Who Sold Y/n To One Direction

happy mother’s day to that mom who sold y/n to one direction

More Posts from Puppycrime and Others

3 years ago

zhongli has a moss bed for his pet rocks ...

Amazing, also consider: he has a moss bed but like in the fanciest jewelry box you have ever seen (that he absolutely didn't purchase himself) and he puts them to sleep every night too :)

His definition of keeping pet rocks might be synonymous with like, collecting gems. So everybody mistakes them for jewelry but you open it up and there lies a pebble tucked gently in its moss bed. Zhongli claims it has magical properties that defines it as living and that's why he keeps it. People thought he was insane but since he is the rock expert or whatever they eventually believed him and some plotted to steal it. Obviously that didn't work out and you know what happens when one crosses the (ex-) Geo Archon.


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3 years ago

Log on. Display mental illness. Sexualize the fictional murderer.


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3 years ago

Klee: What’s a thot?

Jean: It’s a... thoughtful person.

-Later at the dinner table-

Kaeya: Here’s the salt, Klee.

Klee: Thanks nii-san, you’re such a thot!

Kaeya: *spits out water*

3 years ago
puppycrime - awful catboy bastard

⭒ childe/reader: killshot ⭒

oh god, can you make my heart stop?

hit me with your kill shot, baby.

i mean it, so serious.

- killshot, magdalena bay

this one’s for you killshot anon (blows you a kiss) thanks for the brainrot i haven’t been able to stop thinking about enemies to lovers childe for DAYS

pairing: childe/reader

characters: childe

genre: fluff?? idk what to classify this as

word count: 599

The sound of your weapon clattering to the ground is an all-too-familiar one. Getting tossed to the ground has you gasping, the impact knocking the breath out of you.

“I win.” His goading voice reaches your ringing ears. “Again.”

You’re not sure how many times this is now, but you expect what happens next; Childe’s towering figure casting your own crumpled one into shadow. Every time, you get better. Every time, you think you’ll finally win.

Yet, every time, the bastard manages to beat you, that damned smirk never leaving his stupid, stupid face.

He prowls ever closer, and you can feel the thumping of his boots through the floor.

Keep reading


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3 years ago

oh hello my time has come !! here have some random thoughts on the mondstadt crew (im not a writer in the slightest so these are probably ooc but shhhhh. canon is fake)

amber and kaeya are both bi & will occasionally exchange notes on who they think is cute -- like, sitting outside while they're eating at good hunter and people-watching, pointing out the more attractive citizens in the plaza. amber's equally attracted to all genders, but kaeya leans towards men/masc ppl, so they often bond over cute guys (and kaeya occasionally gently/affectionately bullying amber for her taste in men lmao). one time she got stood up on a date and kaeya saw her walking home while he was on patrol & tried to cheer her up. at one point he said something to the effect of "girl you are literally crying over a guy who is cis. pick your head up queen, your bunny ears are falling." (do i think he said those exact words? no. would it be funny if he did? yes) and she snort-laughed through the sniffles. as she should, bad bitches have goofy laughs

on that note i headcanon kaeya as a trans man !! the titty window came about post-top-surgery bc nobody pays that much money just to keep their chest in a shirt lmao (kaeya doesn’t, at least). i think he's one of those people who's known his identity from a young age, like, even before he was adopted. since jean is so busy, i like to imagine he's one of the people who helps organize & pull the strings for mondstadt's yearly pride celebrations - which is quite possibly the most extravagant in teyvat, given it's the city of freedom & the whole community has very accepting/chill energy.

lisa is a trans woman and kaeya is a trans man and if someone ever says something rude or misgenders one of them, the other will be a sneaky little shit and stir up trouble for the offending party. transmasc & transfemme solidarity, we love to see it ! lisa is another person kaeya will chill with outside good hunter, comparing notes on who's attractive as they people watch (i hc lisa as pan with no preference, but she'll joke abt only dating women). they'll also talk about whose genders they want to steal lol. they're the type of friends who flirt with eachother platonically & have probably hooked up too ngl. just besties being besties yknow

i like to think of diluc as a demiboy (he/they), & think he wouldn't really put a label on his sexuality. for the longest time he ignored the part of him questioning those things bc he doesn't have time for that!! he runs the whole wine industry, he's too busy for an identity crisis dammit!! he acknowledged his gay thoughts(tm) at one point, said "that's a problem for another day," and shoved them in a box in the corner & promptly forgot about them for several years. mans literally procrastinated on figuring out his gender & sexuality

also about diluc: since in-game, characters can be damaged by their own fire once it's lit something else (see: me burning to death in the swath of destruction that follows xiangling's ult in open grass), diluc has lots of heavy burn scars on his hands & arms. he'd never judge someone else for their scars, but he's insecure about his, which is why he always wears gloves & long sleeves. speaking of, he's bad at taking his own advice. "what are you doing up so late? it's bad for your health to be awake at this hour; go to bed," he says, forcibly tucking you in, before promptly going back out to attend to his darknight duties for another 2 hours. mr ragnvindr please get some sleep

I’m off to bed. But, I would love to hear about your guys’ genshin headcanons for whatever characters. They can be any kind from sexuality headcanons to misc relationship ones it doesn’t even have to be romantic. I just wanna know!!

I would like to hold all genshin characters softly in my hands and i wanna know how you see them too

I’ll start!! One of my headcanons for Beidou is that she takes many a lover, and tends not to settle down anywhere considering she’s constantly sailing about. She has many connections to various men and women across the world because she enjoys the comfort of sharing a bed

Also! I see Zhongli as a paternal figure to a lot of people. including me. And it’s rare for him to take a lover, but when he does he loves in a very ride or die kind of way. Zhongli is in it for the long run when it comes to love


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3 years ago

OC/canon and selfships are good y’all are just scared of having fun

4 years ago

the subtext of dio is so funny like hes never explicitly hilarious but he just lounges around his mansion fucking feeding and looking sexy just in case his grandnephew checks in on him and he has a pet falcon


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3 years ago

What would Kaeya, Diluc, Zhongli, and Baizhu be like if they smoked weed?

Partaking in 🍃

With: Kaeya, Diluc, Zhongli and Baizhu

—————————

Kaeya:

I wrote a lil something with high Kaeya a little while ago: here!

Anyways! Kaeya doesn’t often show it but he is under a lot of stress…All the time

He has a lot of relationships with criminals where information is traded, he has to do all kinds of work for the knights and handle civilian problems aside from knight duties! Everyone tends to think he’s a slacker but he always has a lot to do

So the guy has very little free time! So when he’s high, he tends to just…Space out and relax! He deserves it

He’s content to slouch into his couch cushions and stare into the fireplace for hours with a tired smile on his face. He’s the definition of ‘no thoughts behind those eyes’ when he’s like this and you know what? Good for him

If you’re there with him, he’ll either fall asleep on your shoulder or zone out while listening to you talk. Or both

Because he’s a captain, he has to uphold his image though so this is a super rare thing 0-0

Diluc:

Coughs a LOT, complains about the smell and overall doesn’t approve of smoking in the house but if he does join in…

He’s a very loud, affectionate drunk and can be some what similar when he’s high

Very clingy but gets bored easily, he’ll get up to wander around and then come back to sit with you. Then he gets bored so he gets up again to walk around. Then he misses you so he comes back to sit again. This will go on as long as you allow it

If you get annoyed and finally tell him to sit his ass down he’ll sigh very dramatically over and over which is even more annoying

He gets cravings too but then after a cook makes whatever he wanted he takes two bites and decides he doesn’t want it anymore :/

I love him…But he isn’t cut out for this lmao

Zhongli:

Zhongli is even more talkative than he usually is but lacking his usual formal filter

He sounds more tired than usual but his stories have a lot more detail than they did last time you heard it

He’ll literally spill all of his secrets to you since it’s just you guys. Archon orgies, playing pranks on vison wielders, throwing boulders at Venti, he’ll tell you all about it all while laying half on the floor, half on the couch

He might remember telling you, he might not. Hell, who knows if you’ll remember? Either way, he turns into a comedian when he’s high

“-So that is what I said, I made sure that…That stupid airhead of an Anemo Archon stopped writing profanities in the clouds when I wasn’t looking. I threw that boulder from Qingce Village to…Do they call it Springvale now..? I think they do. Either way, apparently I created a crater of sorts over there. It’s a sizable pond nowadays, the townspeople love fishing there”

That’s literally so much to unpack dude

Baizhu:

As a herbal pharmacist, I’m sure he’s smoked plenty of herbs before so Baizhu is experienced!

He’d probably be the one guiding you along to make sure you are not only safe but having a good time too

He doesn’t smoke a lot at once, just enough to feel relaxed

One of his favorite things to do while he’s high is going to listen to the storytellers by the Northland Bank. He’ll take a seat in the back and listen! He isn’t totally there, he mostly zones out but it’s fun! He’ll probably want to take you there too

Otherwise you’ll be in the back of the pharmacy together with whatever herbs you want at your fingertips. Don’t worry, the Fatui can get more for him whenever he wants ;) shh


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puppycrime - awful catboy bastard
awful catboy bastard

21 ✦ not sfw ✦ minors dnf this is the account where i reblog posts about fictional characters and go feral in the tags he/him ✦ it/its ✦ fang/fangs ---------------------------------------- stuff you'll find here: ✦ fanfic (that's the whole point of this account lmao), art, shitposts, brainrot ✦ obey me! & jjba (currently. this changes as my adhd drags me from one hyperfixation to another on my little leash)

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