What The Media Won’t Show You; Men Supporting Women At The Chicago Tr*mp Protest. I Almost Cried, It

This is important everyone! Please take your time to read through this.

Since joining Tumblr, I’ve met a lot of young queer people. Look, I’m a bisexual man in a gay relationship, and I’m approaching 30. I was still a kid when Matthew Shepard’s story was being covered on the news. I remember thinking, “I better keep my mouth shut about these feelings I’m having.”

And then I met Dominic when I was 12, and people could see how in love we were. And we got the shit beat out of us. The year I met him, some kids in the grade above me held me down against the bleachers in our gym and stomped on my hand until my fingers broke. Instead of sending me to the nurse, the teacher sent me to the assistant principal to explain the situation. She asked why the kids had beat me up. I said, “They were calling me gay.”

Her response was, “Well, are you?”

My, “I don’t know,” earned a call to my parents, and I was outed. Efforts were made to keep me from seeing Dom. Throughout high school, Dom’s stepmother intensified these efforts. He slept in the basement of the house. Although he was an incredibly talented student, he was prohibited from participating in any extracurriculars. He suffered a lot of physical abuse during those years.

The day he turned 18, he packed up everything he had and walked to my house, and we’ve lived together ever since. Things are better, but they’re not perfect. I’ve had trucks pull up next to me at stoplights and, seeing the pride sticker on my car, through old drinks and garbage into my window. I no longer speak to my dad’s side of the family. I haven’t been to see them for Christmas or Thanksgiving in years. One of my uncles had cornered me at Thanksgiving when I was 17 and said, “I’m not going to judge you, but I’d be happy to break your neck so God can do the judging a little sooner.”

I joined a support group for trans and intersex people. When I joined, 40 people attended regularly. Within the year, the group was half the size it had been. Some couldn’t make it anymore, because they were staying at the shelter, where their stay hinged on them agreeing to instead to attend homophobic sermons. Some were put in correctional therapy. Five of them died. Three of those, I didn’t know, but I knew Alex, the 19 year old who was fag-dragged in Kentucky and died a day later in the hospital, and I knew Stephanie, who went home to Alabama to care for her mom in hospice and was beaten to death with a baseball bat by her mom’s boyfriend.

Tumblr is not reality. The dynamic here does not reflect the dynamic out there. Here’s the part where I finally make a point, and it might be extremely unpopular - but guys, value your allies. Value each other. We are met with enough hate in our daily lives to enter an online safe-space and meet more hate from our own, over petty things. Don’t go after one another over every little thing you find problematic.

Learn to see nuance. Maybe the word “queer” bothers you, and you see a gay man using it as an umbrella term. Maybe someone called a trans man a trans woman because they’re confused about terminology, but the post where they did it was voicing support for the trans community. Maybe someone is just asking a question, wanting to learn more. Stop. Attacking. These. People.

Allies are being driven away. Members of our own community are being ostracized. Others are feeling nervous and estranged, and it’s largely because of places like Tumblr, where the social justice movement is quickly becoming violent and radical. I am begging you, stop nitpicking “problematic” things and start directing your efforts to create real change. When it comes to comes to your allies, forget the “social justice warrior” mentality and put down your torch. Educate calmly. Be respectful. Be understanding. Be forgiving. And I’m certainly not saying that your anger doesn’t have a good place - when you are met with bigots on the street, congress members who want to pass hateful laws, violent protesters, abusive parents, prejudiced teachers, that is when you need to be a warrior. That’s when it counts. In the real world. When you have the opportunity to protect people from real harm. Attacking your would-be allies via anonymous asks is just going to lose us ground in the long run. And we don’t have time for that, not when trans women of color are being murdered every day, not when states are still fighting against marriage equality, not when there are politicians in office who believe that trans people are possessed by demons, not when we’ve just lost 50 brothers and sisters to one gunman, not when the media won’t even admit that the attack was homophobic.

Please step back. Look at the big picture. Look at where we are, globally. Don’t just log on to your safe space and attack your allies over small missteps. That’s like washing the dishes in a house that’s on fire, kids. Let’s fight on the battlefield, and when we come home to each other, let’s just focus on bandaging up our wounds so we can go out and win the war.

LOVE YOUR OCS!!! YOU DID GREAT ON THEM!! EVEN IF THEYRE OVERPOWERED!! EVEN IF THEYRE EDGY!! EVEN IF THEYRE CLICHE!! YOU PUT SO MUCH TIME AND EFFORT INTO THEM AND YOU SHOULD LOVE THEM AND LOVE YOURSELF FOR MAKING THEM!!! 

dear pagan tumblr:

PRACTICE SAYING THE FOLLOWING THINGS:

“oh! i didn’t know that. thank you for telling me this new information.”

“you’re right, i’m sorry for appropriating this custom.”

“i understand that you disagree on how-to-x, but we practice different traditions, so the way you do x and the way i do x are different.”

“i don’t understand this, could you try to explain further/explain it in more simple terms?”

“hey tumblr, is x okay for me to do according to this tradition, or would it be inappropriate?”

“even though i learned x originally, i see what you’re saying about how it’s problematic, and i’ll try to change accordingly.”

Plant Witchcraft: A Beginner’s Guide to Growing

I would like to start this post out by saying I am in no way a professional and have only been studying/practicing witchcraft for about a year. I just know a lot about plants and the ability to sense the health/needs of a plant comes very naturally to me (I will make a post about how to do this soon!)

EASIEST PLANTS TO GROW IN WITCHCRAFT~

IN ORDER FROM EASIEST TO HARDEST

• Chives- can grow in limited light and  space, very easily propagate (regrow)

• Mint- very hardy, requires shade and some light, start from seeds

• Cilantro- fast growing, can be planted indoors, does not transplant easily, Is NOT perpetual (dies after it flowers, wilts quickly, pretty much dead after one growing season. Info from @rwt-mystic-corner)

• Basil- can grow in small spaces, require sun, start from seeds

• Parsley- easy to grow, low maintenance and limited lights, though hard to germinate 

• Oregano (wild marjoram)- very hardy, easy to grow in winter, requires full sun

• Sage- large, hardy, start from cuttings, requires full sun

• Thyme- requires full sun, hardy, easy to propagate from seeds or cuttings

• Aloe Vera- easy to overwater, low maintenance, slow growing, little water, full sun (they are a desert plant)

• Chamomile- low maintenance, little water, full sun with some shade, easy to overwater

• Dill- start as seeds, small, easy to grow indoors, hard to overwater, requires full sun

• Rosemary- though very large, easy to grow indoors and easy to overwater

• Bay laurel- requires well-draining soil, full sun, water often, grows large, slow growing

• Lavender- hard to grow indoors, requires little water, best in dry conditions, start from seeds

• Roses- requires full sun, seasonal, grows only outside, requires fertilizer, best grown from transplants

SOURCES: Easy to grow herbs | More easy to grow herbs | Gardening resource | @thesigilwitch helped to compile this list

INDOOR VS. OUTDOOR~

THE ONGOING ARGUMENT

Pro-Outdoors

As a green witch with a strong yearning to be at one with nature, I prefer to grow my plants outside. I have a small garden (about 4’ by 4’ and 10” deep) that I have several plants in, mostly succulents. Though my garden is small, it’s very peaceful for me to have my own little space that I can survey all at once. I’ve never grown a large garden and so can’t say if it is better/worse. If you are going to plant outside but have little space to do so, a little garden is a simple solution. This also allows your plants to get more sun, fresh air and space to grow.

Con-Outdoors

Winds, heavy rain or a hot/cold front can easily kill off more delicate herbs and plants. Animals like birds, cats and mice might be attracted to outdoor gardens, and though these animals are delightful to be around, they rarely leave your garden at peace. Planting outdoors is all-in-all a less controlled environment and, though it is more natural, can be tough with little experience.

Pro-Indoors 

If you live in an apartment or can’t plant outdoors, an indoor garden is ideal for you. Plants used in witchcraft like herbs and flowers can be easily grown indoors provided they have enough light and proper care. Having plants inside can really help create a safe space and keeps them from the harm of rain and unwanted animals or bugs. It also gives you easy surveillance of your plants.

Con-Indoors

Plants can easily die if they are strangled by too much care, and beginner gardeners can be over-bearing. The biggest problem with growing indoors is that most plants require 4-6 hours of full sunlight a day and windows are just unable to provide this amount of light. Also, keeping plants in small pots tends to strangle new growth, and limits a plants ability to grow very large. While your plants might be kept warm in the winter, it’s less worth watching large plants struggle indoors.

Conclusion~

Indoor planting is good for beginners or those with little outside space or building ability, but don’t be too over-bearing and make sure they get enough light and fresh air. Outside gardening is better if your plants are healthy and hardy and should be left to more experienced gardeners with enough space to tackle the project.

HOW TO PLANT ANYTHING~

IF YOU DON’T HAVE A “GREEN THUMB”

My Experience

Even though I consider myself a green witch, I also struggled with this in the beginning. Before I really learned to read the health of my plants, they would die without me even knowing it. I thought, “I can’t even keep a cactus alive!” Well, cacti are actually quite hard to care for if you don’t know what to look for. In fact, everything is. Plants are hard to care for if you don’t know what to look for. So first, do your research. Plants have two basic needs: food and water.

Research

Research how this plant grows in the wild. If it grows in the desert, it probably needs a lot of sun and little water. If it grows on the rainforest floor, it needs to be consistently moist and doesn’t need much light. It is important to replicate plants’ natural conditions to keep them healthy. Research is everything.

Food

Plants need sun, and most need lots of it. Plants have to have sun or they can’t produce enough “food” for themselves and they starve. 4-6 hours of good window sun is enough for most plants. If a plant is growing in an odd direction, growing too tall or dropping leaves at the bottom while wilting, it is probably not getting enough sun. Slide it towards a window or put it outside on sunny days.  

Water

On that note, plants need water. This is by far the biggest thing “black-thumb” people struggle with! If you buy the wrong kind of soil, it can drown a plant even if you never water it. If you over-water in the winter, your plant may freeze. Again, think about the plant in the wild. A good tip is to see how thick the leaves are! A cactus is essentially one big leaf, and they are very thick and round, therefore they need very little water because they store it in their “leaf.” A big tree with many leaves or a stalky plant needs a lot of water because it can’t retain any. If a plant is yellowing, mushy or dropping leaves while others remain plump, it is being overwatered. Do not water it again until all the soil feels bone-dry. If it is being under-watered, a plant will be wilted, brown or yellow and the soil will be very dry.

SOURCES: Growing herbs indoors 

PLANT IDENTIFICATION~

WHAT IF I CAN’T I.D. MY PLANT?

Help

A lot of people struggle with this and, if you didn’t buy your plant as a baby from a store that includes labels, then you might not know what your plant even is! Stores like Home Depot, most plant nurseries and private growers label their plants and how to care for them. But if you find yourself not knowing what your plant is, here are some helpful tips.

I’ll divide this plant identification into 2 categories: simple and advanced.

Simple I.D. information

(simple identification tools such as types of leaves, plant anatomy, and easy to use interactive identification)

How to I.D. leaves

How to I.D. flowers

Quiz for determining plant species

Types of Plants

Popular Houseplants

Advanced Resources

(requires knowledge of dichotomous keys, latin names and meanings, and some complex plant anatomy. These are probably more accurate.)

Understanding Latin Binomencalture

Latin Nomenclature of Plant Species

Dichotomous Key to Plant Families

How to Google your Plant-

Of course, Google is always your best friend! If you can determine the type of leaf, flower, color or species from the easy-to-use guides, you can just google it!

SOURCES: The ask this information came from asked by @fuzzzyuniverse

WHERE TO GET HERBS IF YOU CAN’T PLANT THEM~

CONVENIENCE OF STORE-BOUGHT HERBS

Most local supermarkets sell herbs with other spices, in small containers, either ground or whole. While these herbs have already been preserved and possibly seasoned, it is a quick, easy and time/money-saving option for any witch. There is a certain magickal property to growing your own herbs, but it is by no means necessary! I don’t grow any herbs at all; I buy them all from the store. Preparing your own herbs goes much farther than just being able to grow them, and knowing it has been done right by a professional is certainly magickal. They work just fine and are often more enjoyable to smell or eat because they have been grown professionally.

HELPFUL GARDENING TIPS~

AWESOME LINKS N’ STUFF

Herb list from @thebluechicory HERE | More about indoor growing | Micro-gardening tips (outdoors)

I hope this had been of some help to you! If any links are broken or you would like me to add/edit something, just shoot me a message. Happy growing!

This…should be illegal

fandom for an American TV show: don’t watch it online! watch the show on TV when it airs so the ratings go up! show your support!

me, a mere European: 

why does this look like the cover to a 90’s R&B / hip-hop album

Reblog if Black Lives Matter to you

Where are those woke white people at!?

the bar for 2017 is set so low it’s incredible