Reader's Block Is Killing Meeeeeeeeeeee

Sometimes I think i relate with Amanda from the poem 'Amanda' by Robin Klein and I just wanna climb up that tower and stay there and never let my hair down for anyone.

what am i smiling at ? the made up scenarios of course

life is so good when ur reading a book and taking it w u everywhere like your little child

December 12, 2023 8:47 pm

Me and a friend of mine were discussing about my train of thoughts. i told my friend that my train of thoughts doesnt necessarily need to be defined as over thinking. the track of my train does go in a continuous loop from time to time but most of the time it goes straight with slight bends and curves.

I told him there were happy thoughts in here too. nice and comforting ones. and the ones that save me too. And he asked me if i could give him an example.

I told him about one of my realization thoughts i had recently. it was one of those thoughts that just stuck with me. I realized i find my cosmic insignificance very reassuring. We are always waiting and ready to be alive and do something and exist. I know I am. To the point where it drives my anxiety. Existing becomes my greatest fear. Existentialism, something i have craved from as long as i could differentiate souls and objects, becomes so horrifying. So, at times like this, it is comforting to realize that universe might just not give a shit about me. Like the universe doesn't care that i messed up that one time two days ago. and the stars dont care wht i do. i exist on my on terms so i don't owe this life to anyone. and sometimes that thought really helps calm everything down.

Iconic Things I heard today while I was walking down the street.

"Did your brain finally collapse on itself from the weight of your ego?"

must be nice to be able to let things go, unfortunately everything that has ever happened to me never leaves my mind