Why Is This My Life?

happy Thursday the 20th

So apparently Tumblr ate my original post about this but:

A couple weeks ago I’m going to get lunch and as I open the fridge, my mother attempts to communicate to me that any chicken currently in the fridge is ok for people to eat, because the chicken that was intended for the dog to eat has been used up.

What she actually says is, “That’s human chicken.”

After taking a minute to process all horrible implications of the phrase “human chicken”, I decide to go a different route and hold the tupperware of chicken out to my sister, saying, “Behold, a man!”

This was evidently the wrong choice, as it meant I had to explain to my parents who Diogenes was, thereby cementing the incident in their minds and leading to me, just now, opening the fridge to see the following incredibly cursed image:

Want to collaborate on a Google Doc with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickinson, Dickens and Poe? 

Click here. Start typing. Enjoy the hilarity. 

Ninja Update: Wanna see something fun? Mention Shakespeare in a sentence and see what happens. 

Forgot to post yesterday so hereis 21 and 22!

For 21 i combined the prompts from both lists so chaines and Leitner

And for 22 memories, birthday in the archives

@emerald-emerlad

1: hey there, OC(s) here

Inktober! Pt1 day 1, @spacebunprince

Im always here to talk

Reblog if you would be devastated if you found out one of your followers committed suicide.

Just some art

Same drawing just edited one on my tablet

So I’ve decided sense I’m bored this is what I’m gonna do.

EVERYONE WHO REBLOGS THIS. 

I WILL SCROLL THROUGH YOUR BLOG FOR A MINUTE

AND TELL YOU WHAT KIND OF PERSON I THINK YOU ARE

EVERYONE

Every time I see a post about updog I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help the poster complete their joke.

I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(