Okay Okay I Just Watch Color Rush 2 And (spoilers Included) Hear Me Out.

Random thoughts on 4 minutes the series. Spoilers for episode 5.

Just feeling this overwhelming sadness while watching 4 minutes the series. Cause the happiness feels like it’s gonna break so soon.

Ah, is that the happiness shattering? TvT

Okay it’s been a few hours. Heading back to bed. (Like 4-5 ish hours. I did get some work done. I just need to not get so caught up in my head and just go for it when painting, or well making anything. So I will. Once I wake up)

Ahhhhh. My rambles about episode 5 of Manner of Death. I wrote as a watched so it’s in the moment thoughts for the most part. Also spoilers.

This is a lot more screams of anguish than happiness btw. So my rambles are more cries.

Oh my goodness they’re all assholes. Ah first meet hey friends how you been he’s helped you on a bunch of cases supposedly and then this one shows up and apparently everyone’s like friends what nope don’t care about you in the slightest (or are going a very bullshit route about protection but come on). Also if the wounds are similar to the previous murder, why the fuck wouldn’t you look into that. Aaaaaaahhhhh, what the fuck man. They’re all such assholes. Ah yes this is how you protect someone, threaten them in compliance. And never explain jackshit. Cause that always works out. (that sentenced is supposed to be read sarcastically btw)

You know, keeping good relations is kinda important for cooperation. Like you don’t need to like each other to work together, but also you kinda do need to do your job too. Investigations take time, but dismissing evidence due to bias and also just plainly ignoring evidence, like come on man.

Can you tell I’m mainly rooting for Bun and his doctor besties? Plus that one school kid. Like I know there’s more going on but also fuck them. For the moment.

Noooo! Don’t die mr journalist!!! I don’t like you but I also don’t hate you! You should really verify your information with more sources and I just really don’t like you but also, you know shit! Live please! Being an asshole does not make you evil, just an ass. You must live man! Oh okay you’re not dying just tracking someone…. Bitch you better not get killed.

Oh you fucking douchebag you shot him!!!!! ……..

Hey doc, I think you should tell your doctor besties what all has been going on with you. At least then they can support you more. And since everyone is focused on you they wont really go for the others yet. Plus I think the others might be just slightly better at keeping things hidden. They’ve been helping you so far.

Oh he ate the chip, fucking genius of course he did.

Sorn? Sorn and That, is that their names? I hope they’re a crime fighting duo, or well more like a protect each other one.

Episode 6

Doctor besties!! I love you guys!

Hold up why are they using that tape? It looks like the type I’ve had to use for projects and I loathe it. I’ve had to make sculptures out of that shit. The tape actually isn‘t that bad, I just don’t have a good relationship with it.

Aaaauuuuuuuugh. I don’t trust it. I don’t trust anything. Beyond Evil, I miss you. You made me doubt literally everything but damn why do I gotta go through it again.

Ah inspector M, the better one (in my opinion). He’s just been more cordial and respectful so far, plus I find him friendly and amusing.

Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh-I have work I need to do T^T. Do I procrastinate or do it? Hmmmm, imma do my work. I shall continue this show later.

You know how I said I was better? Guess who’s sick again! Wooooooooooo! T^T

Let’s see what to ramble about this time. I’m actually in a good mood for this post so ah I have no idea. Oh I’ve just started watching Jazz for Two. Seems very fun so far. I don’t have any of their names memorized at this point in time so uh I love the blue ish haired ones personality a lot. I too tease the shit out of my friends, lovingly of course. And to the one friend I have who knows about this blog, you know. Anyway I just find him to be fun. I’m looking forward to seeing how every characters friendships progress. Though I am worried about how stressed certain plot points might make me. Though, I kinda only know some clips from this show so I got nothing on where the plots gonna head. Can’t wait to find out.

Oh I also found another show on YouTube (idk if it’s the official version though) called Furious Duos. I don’t think I quite understand what’s happening in it but I am gonna try to watch it later.

Missing: The Other Side. One day I’ll be able to finish you. One day. Once you’re back on a streaming service I hopefully have. Pls, I need to know what happens.

Anywho, ah I’m in a good mood. I’m gonna get back to watching Jazz for Two and maybe even get some food. I had so much work to do today and finally get to rest. Still have a little bit to get done but now’s my resting time so I’ll worry about it later. That and if I set aside an hour I should be alright. Oh, still rambling. Have a wonderful day/night! Take care!

Going onto [insert random streaming service] to finish watching a show I started… only to find its no longer there. Removed with no warning, and I now I’m left to grasp at straws. TvT

Alas, why. Oh well, time to search for it on other streaming services I hopefully have

That’s it imma start collecting these. Every time something uses an unfathomable amount of candles all I can think about is everything going up in flames.

My grades are glitched and I’ve been having to go back and forth on messaging people to try to get it fixed. It’s hard though cause thinking about grades can send me spiraling. It just feels so suffocating and then I start panicking and so I literally cannot let myself think about it or just ruminate on it. I feel like a bother having to message my professor this much. It should be fine though, yeah? I mean this is their job so hopefully yeah? I managed to send out another email to my professor today after sending one to my advisor so fingers crossed that everything will be fixed after this one. I hope, it’s like painful for me to think about this stuff so it just gets increasingly distressing to me. One day I’ll figure out what all mental things I have but until then, this public diary will do. Cause for some reason this helps me more than an actual diary. Don’t know why screaming into the void is more comforting than into a notepad for me. Well if it works to make me feel better than it’s worth it. I am still hungry so might do that. Would help if I could overthinking but eh rambling my thoughts at least gets them out of my head so there’s that. Okay I’m feeling a bit better now, still hungry, but better. Signing off for now. - PendingHopes

Sleep is cruel. I go to bed before midnight, I wake up at midnight. I go to bed at midnight I wake up at 5am. I go to bed later than midnight I wake up at 2pm.

I am hungry. I’m also awake. Since apparently I can only sleep for around 5 hours and then I must be awake for around 5 hours before I am able to return to sleep. Why does this happen to me? Oh well what do I ramble about today? Let’s see. I got a sweet new satchel today at a thrift store. It’s not my preferred color but hey it holds all my shit and it fits my art supplies so it’s sick. Got a new outfit that makes me feel like a vampire as well, so that’s nice. No idea what I will wear it for but I like it so maybe I’ll throw it on at random. Sadly have yet to get my friends invested in the shows I like but apparently some of their friends have similar show interests so one of these days one of my recommendations will get through to someone and not just because a genshin voice actor is in it. Please I need to rant about my shows to someone who either would be just as invested or invested enough in my conversation skills to be down to hear my rambles. So now, about those shows

Stealer: The Treasure Keeper is hilarious, I love him, and also found family. A thief who steals cultural relics that were illegally obtained or being kept for shady reasons etc returns theme to where they belong. This thief meets a group of cops wanting to work together to take down those who obtain these relics.

Circle: Two Worlds Connected - Jump between times where a cop investigating murders and twins who witnessed an alien appearance question reality.

The Guest (2018) - a priest, a cop, and a taxi driver are being haunted by their pasts. Possession, murders, their lives become entangled as they chase down a deadly ghost.

Weak Hero - found family. My heart man.

Also I’m so fucking hungry right now man but I’m also trying to fall back to sleep. Hasn’t happened yet but who knows.

Psychopath diary - Honestly, I’m not that far into this. It seems really interesting but also oh my goodness noooooo. Office worker witnesses a murder has amnesia (due to a cop car. Eyes on the road loves, though to be fair he did jump out it still bugs me). Ahem anyway, he ends up with a diary listing all the murders. However he has amnesia and doesn’t remember who he is and since the diary is the only belonging he was given, yeahhhhhh. I want to continue it but oh no man I just ahhhhh

Unnatural fires - I love how the credits have fire safety information. Super interesting show with found family vibes plus fire safety. Same as how Are You Safe has internet safety tips at the end of it. I recommend both. Haven’t finished either but they are really interesting.

Anyway I feel like shit rn so imma figure out what to do to feel better. Current options are try to sleep again, eat something, write something, watch something, or do something else. Eh I’ll figure it out in a bit.

Bon Appetit- a cute romance story. An office worker and a chef are neighbors. (I haven’t finished this one yet).

Venus in the Sky. - Seems interesting. I stopped at a scene cause I was fairly positive it’d turn into a misunderstanding and I’m kinda sick of those plot lines at the moment. Will continue watching at a later date. An interior designer quits his job and returns to live with his brother. Now working in his brother’s shop he runs into a doctor he knew back in college. What caused the tension between them? Why does the doctor keep coming back?

The eighth sense - imma be honest, I’m a little bit lost with what’s happening in this show currently. I watched the first episode a bit ago but I can’t remember much. I think there’s a lot of family drama in this one, but I don’t remember for sure.

La Pluie - soulmates. The concept is interesting and I like the way they do soulmates. It’s not like a set in stone type deal, a possibility but not a necessity. I love the parents’ relationship and was rooting for the side couple the whole time. However, I got sick of the main couple real fast. They were fine at first and then just kept thinking the other one was cheating. It got old real fast and they mainly only stuck together because they were soulmates. So while I’m not a fan of the main relationship I highly enjoyed the side characters.

Love with flaws - Seems funny. A woman with three brothers learns to distrust handsome men after watching her brothers continuously break hearts. Quick to judge a book by its cover, will she ever be able to trust a handsome man? Will she ever get a date who isn’t interested in one of her brothers?

OMG! Vampires - it’s goofy and I love it. Plus vampires.

Love on Lo - cute short series. They were roomates.

Sing my crush - Appears to be a romance show. I haven’t watched it yet so I don’t know all that it’s about. I’ll watch it at a later date.

Golden blood - The son of a mafia boss and his bodyguard. I haven’t finished so I can’t say much about it.

Stand by me/Addicted - Two separate shows about the same story. Addicted shows more of the toxic character traits and has more intimate scenes. Stand by me does the Aunt (that’s just how I refer to her) and her kid really well. They are a bigger part of the story in this version. The romance is questionable so watch at your leisure.

Until we meet again - this show made me cry. From what I remember it was beautiful and tearjerking. I’m pretty sure there’s a second series showing more of the side couple, Between Us.

Happy ending - now I don’t know what this show is about but I pray it actually has a happy ending. Okay so I’m watching it as I’m writing this and I like it so far but I’m so scared. This show better not make me cry, please be happy. Noooo please don’t let this show be just a misunderstanding, please nooooo. Not another, please. Okay, ya know I liked it. If I’m correct it’s just 4 episodes. I enjoyed the formatting and execution. It was cute.

Happy Ending Romance - ? No clue what this one is or if that’s even the title. I’ll check it out later. Update: So this does exist I just can’t find it. Well if I am ever able to watch I will add a summary of it, until then you can look it up if you’re interested.

Happy Merry Ending - A singer with social anxiety (it’s what the subtitles said were one of the things his meds help with, ah the show just described it as a panic disorder) and the new pianist meet. How will their interactions go? Content warning: the main character experiences some anxiety attacks (I’m only on the first episode so I don’t know what else may occur during the series). Please be aware of what you can handle before watching. Please be careful that there is nothing triggering in this show before you watch. If you have any questions feel free to ask me and I’ll try to scan this show for anything you want to be aware of. I’m just rambling now. His anxiety is giving me anxiety. Reminds me of my anxiety attacks, ahhh. The scenes are fairly short but do be warned. Ah I’m on episode 5, I’ll continue this show later.

Advance bravely - A rich man and a bodyguard. The bodyguard’s sister wants him to help her court the rich man, who is entirely uninterested in her advances. Will the rich man be able to get the siblings to leave him alone? Will the bodyguard ever let anyone date his sister? Who knows, but their interactions are funny and interesting.

Bad and Crazy - I love this show. But my second hand embarrassment be ruining me. The characters are all so fun and the overall vibe is amazing. I feel like explaining my second hand embarrassment a bit. Okay so I get really bad secondhand embarrassment from shows. When I was younger I had to full on leave the room, now I can manage by just covering my face and plugging my ears for some scenes. It’s still incredibly difficult for me to watch some scenes so I tend to watch shows that have a bunch of those scenes with other people. That way I can just get a recap of what happened. Ah this leads me to another thing (by the way I’m just going off on a tangent so this part isn’t related to this specific show), a lot of the romance shows I watch have scenes where one character says another character is blushing. But there’s like no difference. Okay I find this funny because when I blush my entire face just goes bright red, like the entire thing. So when watching a show where they say a character is blushing I’m just like, come on please man can you put a little bit of blush on them or something cause when I blush it’s so freaking obvious. Not a complaint by the way, I just find it amusing. Ah also this show isn’t a romance show, I just went off on a tangent. Still love this show and all the awesome scenes! The fight scenes are so cool! And the characters’ interactions are all so fun! Love the main characters partner!

Beloved in House: I do - I don’t remember why I paused watching this series. But I do remember it was cute and a bit goofy. Ah now i remember, I stopped on an episode because I was afraid of a potential misunderstandings in the next episode. I really should continue it, it seemed so cute. I’ve done some metalworking before so I found the designs super interesting.

Yo fall guy, the movie is incredible. Hands down, I loved it. It was highly enjoyable for me. I loved the execution, formatting, jokes, and music. It was a highly enjoyable film for me.

Our dining table - super cute romance! I’m only on episode one but I am loving it so far. A tired office working going through the motions meets a child and his older brother on his lunch break. What will come of this interaction? Will the office worker continue living a monotonous life, simply surviving? Or will he find more?

Ah I’m a bit sleepy so I’ll stop here for now. Hope you guys find a show you like! Have fun!