Normalize Not Knowing Anything About Yourself. Like Who’s That Guy Lol

So I work at a pizza place. This results in stupid questions like “omg how many pizzas do you make every shift?” Bitch do you think that is at all consistent or something that my depressed ass keeps track of? AND OF COURSE “I like pineapple on my pizza, do you hate me?” Hun, you don’t want to KNOW the things I am required to put on pizza. PICKLES? YEP, THERES A PIZZA WITH PICKLES. We even have these little raisin tomatoes which are absolutely disgusting. And sticky. I have put KETCHUP AND MUSTARD on pizza INSTEAD OF SAUCE. You think pineapple tops how DIRTY I feel after putting ketchup on pizza? AND ARTICHOKES YUGH. THESE MORHER FUCKERS ARE SO NARTSY TASTING THAT WE ARE REQUIRED TO CHANGE. OUR. GLOVES. BEFORE TOUCHING ANY OTHER INGREDIENTS LEST THE JUICE OF THESE SICK FUCKERS DRIP ON SOMETHING AND MAKE IT TASTE LIKE BITTER FUCKING VEGETABLES.

LOOK AT THIS NASTY ASS GREEN THING. IT DOESNT EVEN LOOK LIKE IT WOULD EVER BELONG HERE ITS JUST SITTING THERE. BUT MAKE NO MISTAKE THAT THING IS SOAKED IN ARTICHOKE JUICE BC THAT SHIT GETS E V E R Y W H E R E.

This concludes my pizza rant

Daily reminder that shipping should be respected whether it’s canon or not. That’s the fun in it.

Daily reminder: Kiribaku is never happening <3

it’s happening in my heart and that’s all that matters

fanfiction was such a good idea. like put those guys in situations

Watching Olympics women's weightlifting 🏋️‍♀️

Comic of a joke I made with one of my friend’s. If veterinarians were doctors for veterans.

Everything hurts.

like/reblog if u are:

a bitch

a bastard

an all around fool

an omnipresent all-powerful being

a sparrow

c̵͙̳͕̈͛ụ̷̔r̸̗͎̽̓͗͜s̴̨̈́̿͘e̸͍̰̜͊̈́d̵̛̫̙͍͝͝

capable of moving at immense, incomprehensible speeds

an eldritch being

no one will know which one u chose! :D

ED BALLS

Wait… Isn’t Ed Balls day coming up? ED BALLS DAY, I HAVE TO GET READY TO CELEBRATE 

That’s utterly HORRIFYING.

ADSLKFJLSDKF i WILL turn off submissions you little shits. 

someone just sent me doofenshmirtz x perry mpreg art, it’s not even the worse thing i’ve seen today