Neil

Thisssss. Broke up with my partner 5 days before pride, went on a date with my best friend, having the time of my life rn even though it didn’t work out. Just live your life until you lessen to love it. Have fun in the moment. Go for it. Happy pride loves

this pride month I am wishing everyone a very stop overanalyzing yourself and just have fun with it. have gay sex. don't have any sex. try on a new gender. stop caring about gender at all. talk to your doctor about hormones. go on a date. break up with the person you dont love. whatever it is you have been putting off doing by dithering about it in your head. just do that and fully experience how it feels without trying to put it into words. if you still need a word for it later there will be one. they aren't going anywhere. but people were here before language and there's only so far language can go in giving you a fulfilling human experience. so if you are hiding behind finding the right words for whatever it is your heart wants i hope this month you get the courage to just do it instead.

FINALLY

i just kinda automatically think of all my mutuals as my age but then one person will mention getting married and having a baby and another will mention going into their junior year of high school and i’m like wait what

sigh. ok. so. here is something that people who are Very Online and do a lot of tumblr discourse do not seem to get: many marginalized groups experience huge issues with their sex lives being stigmatized and/or with being consistently desexualized.

queer people’s sex is stigmatized because it’s viewed as dirty and sinful and wrong, to the point that even within the queer community, a lot of positivity that people create for queer people is contingent on us being ~uwu pure soft sweet beans~ who are always ~sweet and tender~, never sexual, never rough or hard, and absolutely never kinky.

mentally disabled people are viewed as eternal children who could never possibly enjoy sex or experience sexual attraction/desire, to the point that people will literally say that it’s bad to be sexually attracted to mentally disabled people and that it’s comparable to pedophilia. (stares at entrapta discourse).

physically disabled people and fat people are viewed as looking so ugly and horrific and disgusting that nobody could ever possibly be attracted to us—even if we can experience sexual attraction, we could never possibly have sex, because nobody could ever be sexually attracted to us in return.

so, in light of this, it is incredibly important to keep in mind that headcanoning (or canonizing, if you’re a creator) people within those groups as asexual is not inherently better and more progressive than portraying them as experiencing sexual desire and having healthy sex lives. i’m not saying “you can never view characters in those groups as ace”, i’m just saying that you cannot get mad at people just for viewing them as sexual. we are also trying desperately to reclaim our sexuality and to see ourselves represented for once.

somebody viewing (or, again, even canonizing) a character as having and enjoying sex is not like, a terrible horrible aphobic crime against all ace people, particularly when that character is in one or more of those groups. like, i’m bi, but i don’t say that viewing a character with no canon sexuality as a lesbian or gay man is inherently biphobic. viewing a character as sexual is not inherently aphobic. 

i remember a few years ago, there was a WTNV episode that vaguely implied that cecil and carlos had sex, and people lost their shit and accused the creators of being aphobic. but cecil and carlos are gay men, and sex between men is incredibly stigmatized, and portraying them as having a healthy sex life is wonderful and progressive and important.

and now, in current tumblr discourse, if a gay/fat/disabled person tries to say “hey it’s pretty weird to consistently headcanon all gay/fat/disabled people as asexual, because when you do it to those groups consistently, it starts to feel like you’re desexualizing them”, people absolutely rip them to shreds and call them aphobic. 

like someone i follow is Right Now Currently being attacked and called aphobic just for saying “martin (tma) is canonically fat and gay and people in those groups are often desexualized so it’s weird to see people consistently insist that he can’t possibly enjoy sex; it’s also weird to see people consistently insist that he must have never had sex in his entire life ever because fat people are consistently viewed as people who nobody could ever be attracted to, so it can carry the unfortunate implication that nobody could be attracted to martin because he’s fat”

tl;dr: stop saying that viewing gay/fat/disabled characters as having and enjoying sex is inherently aphobic, people in those groups are very consistently desexualized and/or have our sex stigmatized, so representation for people in those groups who have and enjoy sex is just as important as ace representation

What the entire fandom thinks in a nutshell whenever Adrien says “she a very good friend”

shitty drawings, shittier sense of humor

i had ideas and i had to draw them,, i may or may not have gone a liiiitle overboard lol

What to do if you find yourself homless- written by someone who has actually been homeless

Most important: Spend the money you have on a motel. Churches probably will not actually help and shelters can be dangerous or turn you away. At a motel you have free breakfast, access to running water, and a lockable place to sleep. Do not waste money on a gym membership like the popular version of this post says to do, YMCA memberships are like $40.

2. Contact family and friends. Now is not the time to worry about being a burden. Your survival and safety comes first and that is all that matters, anyone worth having in your life will agree.

3. Start a gofundme. Even if someone can’t offer you a place to stay, they might be willing to toss out $5 so you can eat today.

4. Libraries have free wifi. Apply to any and all jobs you can think of if you aren’t already working.

5. Any home is a good home. Even if it’s a dingy apartment in a bad neighborhood. If its cheap and you can afford it, snatch it up. 

6. Pancake mix and peanut butter are filling, cheap, and last a long time.

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Fuck off you gremlin

Boyfriends aren’t allowed to follow me get out you’ll see all my slut posts

THIS I didn’t know I was “different” until I was 13, and then I didn’t actually find out I was trans until I was about 14, I didn’t even find out I was aroace until this year. I was in a 2 year committed relationship and didn’t even realize I wasn’t feeling the romantic attraction until around the 2 1/2 year mark. Like boy how did I just never admit to myself and to my partner for 2 years that I didn’t like kissing. What.

hey shout out of recognition and validation to all the queer people who didn’t exhibit many queer behaviors or have queer many experiences when they were young!! shout out to trans women and trans men who didn’t feel bad about or uncomfortable with their AGAB when they were younger and didn’t gravitate toward the “opposite side of things”. shout out to nonbinary and genderfluid ppl who felt content with their AGAB all of their childhood or even teen years. shout out to lesbians who didn’t have any crushes on girls growing up and liked traditionally feminine things and shout out to gay men who didn’t have any crushes on boys growing up and liked traditionally masculine things. shout out to bi and pan and omni people who only had hetero attractions growing up. shout out to aros and aces who thought they experienced crushes or attraction or whatever while growing up and didn’t feel excluded by being surrounded by allo people. shout out to literally any queer people who didn’t “show the signs” growing up because that can make you feel invalidated or worried that you’re faking it and you shouldn’t feel worried about that! When we say that everyone’s journey and experience is different, that includes you!! Happy pride month <3

SPREAD IT LIKE EXPECTING PARENTS SPREAD WILDFIRE THRU CALIFORNIA

@hannahmichelledraws

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