One Day, I Will Not Cry Myself To Sleep At The Mere Thought Of You.

“I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my saviour” might be one of the most devastating lyrics of a song if you understand it, that I relate to. LIKE I COULD GO ON ABOUT THIS FOR DAYS.

knowing that we’ve grown as people, and gone our separate ways, but being burdened by the knowledge that I once knew everything about them. going through life and seeing the little of things that remind me of them, and feeling that sharp feeling of nostalgia of what once was.

it reminds me that there was a time where I knew all of them, it saddens me that I no longer do. I hope they’re happy.

In September, I’ll be the first person in my family to ever go to university.

It comes with expectations, ones that will weigh me down at times, I have no doubt about it. It’s weird knowing there’s no one I can turn to, to ask what it’s like. I’ll be the first to do it, to experience it.

I have to remind myself to be proud. It’s an achievement I never thought I’d reach. 2 years ago I never thought I’d be alive, let alone about to go to university.

It’s weird and strange, and a whole hoard of emotions I’m sure I won’t work through for a while. But for now, I have to remind myself to breathe, and that I’ll be okay. And most importantly, I did something I never thought I’d do. I’ve reached a point I never thought I’d get to, that at least is something to be proud of.

it’s one of those days where nothing I say or do is right. I get screamed at that I don’t listen to what they’re saying. but when was the last time they stopped raising their voices every time I opened my mouth to talk? when was the last time they acknowledged what I was saying, actually listened to what I was saying.

sometimes I think they’re too busy trying to argue with me, and tear me apart at the seams, rather than actually hear what I have to say.

I have so much to say.

maddie and chimney are this 🤏🏻 close to shoving buck and eddie into a closet and lock them into it until they admit their feelings, I CAN FEEL THAT

“you can have my back any day” “i lost him” “you saved him” “there’s no one in this world i trust with my son more than you” “i kind of lost it when i told him” “you were there for him when i couldn’t be” “no one will ever fight for my son as hard as you. that is what i want for him” “because, evan. you act like you’re expendable but you’re wrong” “do more” “you don’t want him to end up like me” “you didn’t end up like you” god he sees him. he sees him and he loves him just. something about eddie knowing buck better than anyone else, being there for his lows and his highs and the good and the bad and still loving him so much it’s a part of him is making me light headed.

Sure,I guess in their world Sarina Wiegman does not exist…

SHE did it FIRST and SHE did it BETTER.

tommy calling buck ‘evan’ during their entire relationship and the first, and only time, he calls him buck is after he breaks up with him. eddie calling buck ‘evan’ only once and it was when he gave buck his goddamn son. the only time tommy called him buck was before leaving and the only time eddie called him evan was when he gave buck proof of him and chris staying. of them wanting buck. of them keeping buck. id say “which could meaning nothing!” but it actually means everything.

one day she will know how much she means to me. I will spend every day I can convincing her of it.

THE SCREAM I JUST LET OUT AT NONI SCORING. 4/6 OF HIS GOALS THIS SEASON AGAINST WOLVES, THATS MY FUCKING LEGEND