@askmichaeldistortion @askhelenrichardson

I'm not russian but i agree

i was laying on the couch and overheard the tv playing national news or smth. and. i hate it so much. why does everyone just pretend that it's ok to say things like "people will now go to jail to 5+ years for discriminating russian army without warnings" (almost direct translation). LIKE?? holy shit they are not even ashamed of their actions and the rules of the dictatorial regime.

Idk who this is I'm just bored

Kept me up at night

I can imagine him having the most epic comes back and-

"YOU TRIED TO KILL ME??? WHY?? I COULD'VE DIED!! YOU LEFT ME THERE ALONE AND YOU DON'T EVEN FEEL BAD OR HESITANT!! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME??? THAT'S THE LEAST THING YOU COULD DO!! I HATE YOU I QUIT"

d0 y0u 3v3r w1zh w3 h4dn't b3c0m3¿

(00C: @theilluzionoftroy)

hM. s0mEtimEs, bUt i d0ubT sHeLlEy w0uLd'Ve eNdEd uP aNy bEtTeR iF iT hAdn'T hApPeNeD.

"Why did you spam likes??"

Why the FUCK are you in like 50% of my recommendations?????

And I respect that❤

Contributing to the meme

OK I HAVE TO TELL EVERYONE FUCK IT

I GOT A HAIRCUT AND I FEEL SO FUCKING MASCULINE AND I LOVE IT AND THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY I WAS BOUNCING ALL DAY AND THE WORLD MUST KNOW.

I Found You. (No I'm Not You Gave Me Ur Acc Pls Feed My Delusional Ass)

What

What's going on

Update: oh hey Yaomi :3

(Insert X's voice) yay! You caught meeee :D best day ever!!:3

Iya

The Distortion is unpredictable, yes, but NOT THIS UNPREDICTABLE...

MOOOOMMMMMM THE DISTORTION (Michael) IS PREGNANT!!!!!

... ..c ca nn hhe ev ve nn ddo thh at ? ??