007. CARNATIONS

007. CARNATIONS

The cold air outside feels like a blanket of ice on Touya's face as he drags his feet through the snow, teeth clattering not from the cold—but from fury.

Fury because he couldn't even bear to look Endeavor in the eye without feeling his heart seize in his chest. It wasn't like the warmth and flutter inside that brought him to life when he looked at you—it was the sensation of an icicle pushing through his flesh and sinking right into his heart that he felt. Because suddenly, he wasn't looking at Endeavor anymore. He was looking at dad. His dad.

It was the undeniable sincerity in his father's eyes that threw Touya's mind off track. He couldn't find a snarky remark to shoot or an insult to spit in Endeavor's face. He couldn't find anything. Moments of the war replayed in his mind like a terrible movie he couldn't turn off. Touya wanted to ask his father if he still loved him—and that split second thought he couldn't stop shocked him to his core.

How could he still have a part of him that loved this terrible man? What was wrong with him?

His mind seemed to jolt awake from a daze as the reality of the situation set in. The bindings they used on his hands to cuff him to the table didn't stop his fingers from shaking, trembling because his father was right there. Barely a foot away from him, looking at Touya.

No, not looking at him. Seeing him. Because Enji places his palm on top of Touya's shaking one and asks if he's ok.

Dad's hands were always warm. They felt just like they had when Enji would carry Touya to bed, or when he'd pat his back after a long day of training in the relentless sun.

Enji was staring into his soul with those terrible eyes. But they weren't like Touya remembered.

Was he really remembering his own father's eyes wrong? Those eyes would show up in his dreams and haunt him for so many years. They'd stare right back at him whenever he looked into the mirror. All he ever saw was him. It didn't matter how much Touya wrecked his body, his eyes were a beacon that screamed 'LOOK AT ME'. They caught more attention that his scars often. Touya's eyes were that beautiful.

He panicked when he felt his father's hand lay on top of his. He looked down at the calloused and large fingers that held his in a firm grip, and Touya could almost feel his father's hand ruffling through his unruly red hair when he was just a kid

Touya flipped the table over before he could stop himself, trying desperately to shield his eyes from his father. But when Enji screamed his name in a panic, Touya turned around for just one moment.

His quirk's greatest weakness was his emotions. And Touya never meant to activate it, never again for as long as he lived. But the sparkling blue fire shot from his palm and towards Enji before he could stop it

Endeavor never did teach Touya how to manage his emotions.

Suddenly he was sixteen all over again. Afraid and alone and walking aimlessly as he broke the nearest window and jumped out of it.

Except he wasn't walking aimlessly. He didn't get very far before his mind quickly realized something was missing

Someone. You.

He wavered outside near the perimeter of the hospital. Touya braced his arm against the trunk of a nearby tree as his breathing came out in erratic and panicked huffs, not enough oxygen filling his lungs to breathe

He needed you. He wouldn't leave—how could he? You were inside somewhere, and you were probably worried. Or maybe you were angry—maybe you were disappointed in him. The thought of you being upset with him has Touya clutching his chest as he closes his eyes, repeating the breathing exercises you taught him over and over again.

He just needed to see you. To tell you he didn't leave. He couldn't leave—he knew one of the consequences could be them taking you away from him. The mere thought has him squeezing his eyes in frustration as he clenches his fists

He doesn't know what to do. He's scared. He feels like a helpless kid, and the overwhelming need to be cared for was at a record breaking high. He'd give everything he had just to see your face right now.

The air smelled faintly of smoke as he watched the evacuees exit the hospital hurriedly. No one appeared to be hurt. Touya wonders if he'll ever get to go on walks with you through the recreational garden again. His guilt was a feeling too strong, and his head hurt like hell.

Touya's heart leaps to the sky before dropping straight to his feet when he feels your hand wrap around his arm

You're pulling him away from the crowd. Touya's larger than you, heavier and taller too. So when you tug on him, hard, he has to move his feet himself to follow you. But it's hard to walk, because he feels like putty and his eyes are wide and blurry with unshed tears he quickly pushes back. The voices of the patients and doctors slowly fade away as the sound of your breathing captures his attention wholly

"Y/n." He whispers, wrapping a shaky hand around your wrist as you suddenly whirl around, your arms encaging him in a hug as he goes completely still. Your face is hidden in his chest, and he finally notices it's snowing when he looks down and sees the snowflakes intertwined between the strands of your soft hair

You're cold. He knows you are because your arms are shaking and your cheeks are tinted pink from the night air. He lets his cheek smush against the crown of your head as he entangles his limbs with yours. It was much more than a hug. Maybe it looked like a hug to an outsider watching the two of you—but you had just touched Touya's soul when your fingers fisted his hospital gown and your hair tickled his cheek

Touya did not like to be touched. But right now, he was melting into your embrace.

"Touya," You choke out, and when you look up at him, he sees your glossy eyes and trembling lips. But you're so brave for him. You swallow down your emotions and quickly move to inspect his burns, holding him so carefully that he finds himself forgetting the stinging pain of his newly acquired injuries as he watches you

When Touya was a little boy, his father was his hero.

He had forgotten that feeling. Of loving someone so much that they embodied everything one would ever need. Of loving someone to the point where you want to latch onto them and never let go. Touya loved like he hated, with a burning passion. Endeavor lost the status of being Touya's hero, and he thought that role would remain untaken. Destined to be forever alone is how Touya often thought of himself after burning up at Sekoto peak. But then there was you. And suddenly Touya's heart was beating again.

"This is so above your fucking pay grade." Touya croaks, a hoarse laugh leaving his throat as you look up at him

"Oh, Touya." You whisper, heart breaking at the sight of his smile. He had a beautiful smile. He smiled with his teeth, wide and big and even after all that happened, he still managed to make you smile too.

"Can I..." You begin, trailing off as he nods, opening his arms and allowing you back into the spot between his arms

"Please, Y/n."

CARNATIONS MASTERLIST.

a/n; everybody boo the author for taking so long with this chapter!! 😠🍅🍅🍅 sorry for making you babys wait so long ☹️☹️ also uh...how are we feeling with the chapter leaks...? we get the official one tmr... yeah i think i'll take it from here horikoshi ☺️ *snatches his drawing pen*

and thank you all SO much for all the love 😭🩷🩷 the comments i get on this story seriously make my day. no my week. NO MY LIFE. I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH 😭💓💓💓💓

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