I Just Wanna Talk About Argyle Coz I Love Argyle

I just wanna talk about Argyle coz I love Argyle

The Byers are back in Hawkins - but Argyle visits his bestie Jonathan as often as his pizza boy paycheck will allow

Argyle likes all the Hawkins crew, but He and Eddie are such easy buds, from first sight. Eddie’s boy Harringtons harder to figure out, more uptight, and maybe him and Argyle just don’t mesh? but Eddie loves him n vouches for him so Argyles cool whatever

Periodic visits means he truly gets a time stamped show of the ahem “growth” of Eddie and Steve’s relationship- like dude is looking happier and heftier each time he travels out here bro good for him

Maybe one time - when Argyles visiting and Eddies definitely gone from overweight and pudgy one visit, to noticeably chunky and fat this meeting - Jonathan brings it up with Argyle - maybe not even meaning to in a mean way, just in that typical gossiping about what’s-changed-since-you’ve-last-seen-someone-way, but Argyle just shuts that convo dead right where it starts just like “whatever dude, what’s theirs is theirs. Live and let love. Chase that fuckin bliss bro” and Jonathan just like laughs and agrees and happily backs off

Anyway - argyle noticing Eddie’s band tees are DEFINITELY on this side of indecent one visit, even noticing that a few times he’s seen Eddie he’s wearing just basic black tees?? No label??? Bro this will not do

Coz Argyles not a skinny guy, and he’s a stoner who works in a pizza shop, he’s got plenty of hefty homies bro, bigger than Eddie even, and it’s not even a thing dude

He’s also super in the know about threads, and he’ll hook a friend up

So Argyle surprising Eddie with being able to source a retailer for plus sized metal band tees - gotta pay delivery from California but Argyle let’s Eddie know, if he doesn’t run thru sizes too quick , he can always just pay for tees and Argyle’ll cart them in his luggage on his frequent trips to the Byers abode

Eddie is definitely super touched and absolutely blown away by argyles generosity and thoughtfulness. Cue happy stoner tears and handholding

Steve is obviously happy for his boyfriend, and ON the surface like “wow that’s really kind of you 🙂🙂 thanks Argyle”

but secretly PRETTTTY annoyed with Argyle ACTUALLY that this means Eddie might be retiring some of his tighter fits - he knows it’s totally unfounded and irrational to be irritated with Argyle YES I KNOW ROBIN and Argyles just being a good friend, and that YES some of those tee shirts could no longer be called such and YES some fits were so tight as to challenge public decency laws LIKE I GET IT ROBIN I KNOW ITS A GOOD THING

Anyway Argyle doesn’t catch this and still thinks Steve’s got a massive stick up his butt, but he respects a clean cut dude who’s into some kinky shit

My guy, this is so cute. I love this so much 😭

Like, yes, 💯💯💯 Argyle meets Eddie and is like, "This is my guy. This spooky-ass metal-head dungeon master is a kindred spirit."

They're high on Eddie's couch and Argyle relates something deep to a game of D&D he's played and Eddie immediately gets misty, like 'this motherfucker gets it, man' and he places a hand on the back of his head and presses their foreheads together and just holds them there for a bit to feel each other's energy.

Meanwhile Steve's in a recliner to the side jaw set and seething. It's not his fault that he just can't wrap his head around dungeons and dragons. What the fuck does argyle know. Steve takes care of Eddie. In more ways than one.

In an immature and petty bid to remind Eddie who takes care of him in fact. Steve vicariously stuffs Eddie, encouraging him to get high, glut himself and put himself in a food coma, then gives him spite head. 'I'd like to see Argyle do any of that' he thinks to himself smugly, rubbing sleeping Eddie's belly.

This kind of thing repeats time and again but almost always when Argyle is visiting Jonathan. And eventually Argyle just has to address the elephant in the room, which ironically is not Eddie.

"Edd, my man. It's so good to see you! It's been too long. Yo but bro, real talk," pulls Eddie off to the side "your boy, shirt-pants, what's his damage? Like he's always giving me mad evils."

"Ahhh ignore him. I think he's just pissed that I rearranged some things this week to make sure I got to see you."

"Man, if you say so. Hey by the way, my guy, I say this with love in my heart but this Megadeth shirt's seen better days. Dontcha think you'd be more comfy in a shirt with some growing room, hell just breathing room. Man, I got a buddy built like an industrial fridge that I can get threads for no problem. Just say the word and we'll get you straight, my guy!"

Eddie getting misty again and pulling Argyle in for a crushing hug "I'm not gonna lie brother, it's been hard. I've had to wear Hanes, Gildan for Christ's sake. Just can't ever bring myself to part with these though... they've got so many memories attached, you know? Hey, Stevie, Argo here's gonna hook me up with new merch! Isn't he the fucking, man!?"

"Wow. Thank you SO much, Argyle. Really, you don't have to do that. It's too generous."

"Aw man it's no biggie! I end up out here all the time, I'll just hit up my man Eddie for sizes and bands, and we can square up later. Gotta keep my main man looking fresh and decked out!"

Steve is absolutely raging and it cues another 'i don't know why i feel the need to stuff you like a Thanksgiving turkey when I'm upset like this, but it's either feed you or run Argyle over with my car, so let's get you fed, big boy' night, leaving Eddie sated and drained while Steve forces himself to get some sense talked into him by Robin.

This is all so good. I would love to write some of this with you if you're ever interested!