How Do I Die In My Sleep?

I have a distinct memory of laying in my bed as a kid and wishing with all my heart that I would get hurt. That I would get into a bad car crash or I'd disappear. So my parents would cry and realize they didn't cherish me enough.

I find it sad that younger me thought she had to get hurt to feel loved.

It’s crazy to me that there are people out there who never thought about killing themselves even once where as I think about it 24/7 every single day

begging god to tell me why he made me this way

feeling like shit mentally and physically

Yk it’s getting really bad when you want to get worse than before.

I hate living, but i don't wanna die because something is holding me back, but i don't know what it is and it's killing me.

Stop acting like you know everything about me.

the urge to die and become nothing becomes stronger every day

god i want to end it all so bad