Daily Blog #4

"the despair of an idealism that you can't attain" aaaaaaaah, i am so dead

"I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and I thought people would see it because 'romantic' doesn't mean sugary' It's dark and tormented - the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism that you can't attain."

- Catherine Breillat

Since I started journaling again, I re-did the cover of my journal. Definitely lovin it ♡♡♡

The fact that I am blushing giggling kicking air over old Bollywood romantic songs after years of very rarely listening to them says a lot about how badly in love I am right now 😩

the ultimate enemies to lover ngl

Crying cuz there's not a single good bookstore in my city (ignore the fact that I have no person to go with either)

It took me a while to understand how it was actually built, I thought it was just some tiny ring like structures until they went to the side. Truly a fascinating structure. A piece of art indeed.

Astronaut sculpture from an ex-physicist (Source/Credit)

Daily blog #12

[Thursday, 22 June 2023]

Did a lot of chemistry today. Idk where the whole day went 🫠

Signing off

User_liztical

Edith Sitwell

At times, I think I am my life's biggest paradox. The way I think, the way I act, the way I speak, my whole existence is like a paradox to me.

I love nature but I also don't like rain and I am afraid of thunderstorms. I love making friends but I don't want to tell them my problems. I tell my friends it's human to make mistakes but my tiniest mistakes eat me away. I am extremely ambitious and love the things I do, but then, I am extremely lazy too. I am a hopeless romantic, very hopeless, but I am afraid if I fall too hard for someone I might lose my own self. I am very confident about myself but it won't take me the slightest moment to get insecure when someone better read, better dressed shows up. I love myself, a lot. But, there are times I look in the mirror and don't like the way I am looking. I am an over-sharer(if that's even a word, but you get it) but I also have some major trust issues. I don't care about what others think but I also want to be likeable. I am really sensitive but I am also really tough. I am very happy but I also cry a lot.

Even my thoughts. At times, I'd think people don't really have bad intentions, it's just a matter of perspective but then I also judge a lot of people for the one thing they did wrong to me. I'd think honesty is just so very important but I also think a truth that might hurt someone shouldn't be said unless necessary.

There's so much of these things that this list could go on forever. But, then I think our lives are a little too long to hold on to just one personality, just one perspective, just one ideology. Wouldn't it be too boring to live such a predictable life?