WHO DECIDED THE BEST OF ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS WAS A GOOD PLAYLIST

greetings!!!! coming over here on tumblr from ao3 to to say how much i love your feemor has a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day fic. A LOT I LOVE IT A ALOT!!!! <33333

Hi! I saw your comments, they really made me smile! I'm glad you liked it. I'm working on the next chapter but I also have three different WIPs so it's taking a while, lol. Thank you for taking the time to say hi!

Danny: I don't exactly think you can have my spleen, your body would definitely reject it.

Tim: Incompatible blood types?

Danny: No, I'm a different species.

*Cue chaos*

Danny is fully aware that he looks a lot like the Wayne sons. He also knows he can convincingly play a Robin after he was wrangled into a costume one Halloween by his friends. He uses this to his full advantage as he dismantles the GIW and takes down Vlad's company.

"Before we start the meeting," Superman said, "Is there anything anyone would like to address first?"

Phantom stood up, chair rolling softly against the carpet as it was pushed back. "Yes, actually," He reached into his utility belt and pulled out a folded piece of paper. "This is my resignation from the Justice League,"

A beat of silence.

"Oh," Wonder Woman said. "Has something occurred in your personal life?"

"Yeah, I guess you could call it that," Phantom snorted, sounding remarkably bitter, a stark difference from the cheerful young man they knew.

"Is there nothing we could do to help you?"

"No. There isn't. Because it happened ten years ago,"

"Is there something wrong with your powers?" Flash, who was very quick at mental math and quickly aligned it to a fourteen year old metahuman gene activation, said.

"Yes. There is something wrong with me," Was the meeting room getting colder? "Because I'm not a metahuman. I'm a ghost,"

Incomprehension flitted across many Justice Leaguers' faces, while a dawning horror alighted on others.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Green Lantern, freshly back from a trip to Oa and in no way up to date on recent politics, asked.

"Why. Didn't I. Tell anyone?" Phantom said softly, and yes, the room was definitely getting colder. "I don't know. Why didn't I, fourteen and freshly dead, tell anyone about what killed me? Why didn't I, the son of ghost hunters, tell my parents I was what they hated most? Why didn't I, the hero of my hometown, tell people I was the same kind of 'thing' that attacked the town on the regular. Why didn't I, in an increasingly hostile environment, tell people I was the same kind of being they made effigies of to burn and laugh at. Why didn't I, the person whose existence was just made illegal, tell anyone?"

Silence. Their breaths wafted in front of their faces. There was frost spiralling up the wall behind Phantom like an aura of dread.

"Because. I. Was. Scared. I was scared of exactly what's happening now with the Anti-Ecto acts. I was scared of being hated. Of being treated like a monster. Of being held down by my parents, my town, the government, and ripped apart molecule by molecule just like they said I should be,"

Phantom breathed in deeply and exhaled, temperature slowly rising and icy crystals dissolving.

"I became a hero to defend humans from invading ghosts. And now the roles are switched. Humans are the ones invading ghost towns, their homes, kidnapping and enslaving them, sneering and laughing all the while. I am half human. And I am half ghost. I am a hero to the people that need me. Not just in name or words or membership cards," Phantom waved a hand to the paper he had put on the table, "But in deeds. I am not a metahuman. I am not a human hero. I am not human. And I would not be a hero at all if I didn't do what was right,"

Phantom planted his feet on the carpet, shoulders rolled back and head held high. His bearing was regal. They had never seen Phantom like this before. "The Justice League is beholden to the governments of this mortal world. But as someone who has known you, fought beside you, and prevented you from becoming part of my Realms too soon, I hope you are first and foremost beholden to your conciouncess,"

And without another word, Phantom turned, clawed a hand through the air, a portal ripping into existence at his fingertips, and stepped through. The swirling green portal closed behind him, like he was never there.

A beat of silence.

"First on the agenda-," Batman began.

"What the fuck?!" Green Arrow snapped. "Bats, you are not telling me we are just going to ignore-,"

"-we will discuss the Anti-Ecto acts and how we will best prevent the egregious sentient rights violation the United States Government has passed into law," Batman continued.

"We were planning to bring this up even before Phantom revealed himself," Superman interceded peaceably.

"You knew, didn't you," Wonder Woman said accusingly, gaze fixed on Batman.

"Yes," Batman said. "It was obvious if you were looking,"

"Well then why didn't you tell any of us?!" Green Lantern demanded.

Batman fixed a flat stare on Green Lantern. "It has been made expressly clear to me," He said slowly, "On multiple occasions, that sharing my knowledge of others' secret identities, up to and including the sources of other people's powers and/or training, was expressly forbidden as an invasion of privacy. Including revealing my knowledge to the individual in question as it was 'creepy' and 'honestly better off not knowing you knew',"

Silence.

"Any other objections?"

Silence.

"Good. Let's get started,"

Dark Secret

So! Danny was discovered pretty quickly after his first battle against the Lunch Lady. His hair turned white, and his body shape was a little different, but he largely looked very similar to his Human Form, so it was only a matter of time really.

Thankfully he was assumed to be a Metahuman.

He didn't look like any other Ghost, the closest resemblance was his hair and eye color, but even that could be explained away. Also his parents were adamant that he couldn't be a Ghost because he was still Sentient and not Evil, so he must just have powers that just looked similar to Ghost Powers esthetically. Probably as a result of the Portal Accident, which he used as an explanation for how his powers awakened.

Danny also avoided using the more obvious Ghost Powers like Intangiblity and Invisiblity, sticking mostly to the most basic Flight and Energy based Powers he got to be as generic as possible. If anybody saw otherwise, it was a trick of the light or a trick of the Ghosts.

Danny became the Hero of Amity Park, always pretending to be something else. It was his darkest secret.

Unfortunately because the public never saw a Ghost like Phantom on a positive light, their perception of Ghosts never changed. Nobody believed that Ghosts could be anything aside from Evil, and as the knowledge of Ghosts and the Ghost Zone began to spread around the world that perception became more and more commonplace.

If Danny had been revealed in the early days, it could have been salvageable, but nowadays if his secret was revealed he would have to convince the entire world that everything they knew about Ghosts was wrong. It would practically be impossible.

Even when he joined the Justice League when he became an Adult, he still had to hide his secret. Years of hiding made sure he could conceal his true Nature from the magic users on the team, but he still had to be distant from the team just to be sure.

While all this was going on in the Living Realm, his adventures in the Ghost Zone still happened as normal. He saved Pandora and the Acropolis, dethroned the Tyrant King Aragon, managed to defeat Pariah Dark in Single combat, and even became recognized as a Great Warrior by the Far Frozen.

After years of hiding, he actually felt more at home in the Ghost Zone than in the Human Realm. There he could be his true self without having to hide a huge part of his identity, and people accepted him for who he was. Sure he had enemies there, but he also had more real friends outside of Tucker and Sam.

He was content with his double life, acting as a Hero to the Public while hiding his true self, and secretly going to the Ghost Zone to be himself among his friends and even his enemies.

Of course it all came crashing down when he Anti Ecto Acts finally passed.

Now there was a Legal Path for Humans to enter and profit off of the Ghost Zone. Beyond just being able to legally kill and experiment on Ghosts, the Acts also allowed Humans to claim parts of the Ghost Zone as their own Property, enslaving the Ghosts residing there, and destroying the Ecosystem of the Zone because there were no laws preventing it.

And now Danny had a choice.

He could either side with the Humans to which he was a Hero, allowing them to destroy the Ghost Zone and Enslave the denizens living there with the full support of the Government, or he could side with the Ghost Zone, betraying Humanity and the people he had been protecting for years, but trying to save those who had accepted him for his true self years ago.

To him the answer was obvious.

Danny: You left me! Alone! I needed you and you weren't there! (Talking about Constantine leaving him to deal with the ghost portal, that fucker)

Constantine: You're a big kid. You handled it. You're not my responsibility. (Danny had it under control, and Constantine does not want to touch Amity park with a ten foot pole)

The Batfam: 🫢

Dp x dc

A classic au where the batfam adopt Danny and they dont know his secret (yet)

Then one day Constatntine come to the mannor to discus something ofthe league, see Danny and is is like

"Brat"

"Jerk"

And start yelling.

No one of the bats know why, but then somone tell as joke: " ha ,maybe Dany is constantine bastard and he is demanding the inhetitance"

The bats grow in silence wirh the realization

(Just gonna put this here, hope you don't mind the addition)

The next human Danny comes across is an old man in the kitchen. He had scurried away from the random office or whatever it was when he heard the whirring of an elevator (enhanced hearing for the win. Except for when it was overwhelming) and had followed the next source of noise. The old man seemed to be cooking dinner or a late night meal depending on whatever time it was. Danny was currently just a Little Guy, he really couldn't care less after having his nap.

The old man looked down at him. He looked up. They maintained eye contact. The old man raised an eyebrow. Danny flicked his tail. The other eyebrow rose up to join the first. "I see Master Damian has a new... companion," the, apparently British, man said. He also didn't get called a pet, good. He may just be a little guy who enjoys cardboard boxes and avoids higher thinking skills, but he wasn't a pet. "And when's the last time you've been fed, little one?"

Fed? Food? Danny wagged his little tail and gave his cutest expression. Widen the eyes, furrow his little brows just so, "Mrrp?" He asked, trying to convey his utter starvation and how he was just a little guy, had never ever been fed, he mostly ceartinly didn't eat before starting his vacation. British Guy simply nodded and turned to whatever heavenly smelling thing he had in his pot.

Danny pawed at British Guy. He wanted some! British Guy gave him another raised eyebrow. "I may be unfamiliar with your species, but the general rule is no hot chocolate before allergies are ascertained,"

Danny whined pathetically. He was just a little guy! And if it wasn't for him, then who was it for?

Traffic light kid, out of his traffic light uniform, came skidding into the kitchen.

"Pennyworth! Have you seen-" Green eyes locked onto him. "You!" Yes, him, who still wasn't being fed! The rest of the family(?) chose to burst in at that moment. Danny wanted a vacation, not whatever this is!

Danny had been planning this vacation for months, and Ancients did he plan to make the most of it. His friends and parents all agreed to keep Amity safe while he’s gone for the summer, and he had Clockwork to tell him when it was time to portal back home. As he floated towards a natural portal in the ghost zone (because it’s far more fun when the destination is a surprise), he began shifting his form. He had been dealing with so much both as a human and as a ghost. School, fights, teen drama, hunters— but not this summer! This summer, it’s going to be different! He won’t have to worry about human or ghost problems, because this summer, he’s not going to be either! He’s going to be…

A Little Creature™️.

He doesn’t use his “compact” form very often, since it dampens his powers and takes away his ability to talk. But, on this vacation, he won’t need his powers. He can just wander around an unknown dimension, steal some food, sleep in a cardboard box. If he actually needs to be human for something, he can switch back no problem. But honestly? It’s fun being a little guy, even if being a little guy does make him kinda stupid. (He got stuck in a cardboard tube the first time he went into his little form. He was stuck for half an hour. Didn’t even think to phase out of it. As soon as he was pulled out of the tube, he went right back in and got stuck again). Plus, he can stay in this form for an incredibly long time— he doesn’t even switch back when he’s hurt! (Which no, it was not fun to learn that, but good to know)

Shifting into his compact form, Danny slips through the portal and finds himself wading through a big pool of stuff that seems like ectoplasm, but slightly to the left. Like yeah, it’s technically ectoplasm, the same way a carton of milk set out in the sun for three days is technically milk. Not fun to play in, horrible to eat.

As Danny pulls himself out of the gross, bubbling “ectoplasm” pool, shaking himself off, he sees some sort of big fight going down. Bunch of people with swords, some big guy dressed as a bat, some kid dressed as a traffic light. He considers stepping in for a moment, but… no. This is his vacation. Not his dimension, not his problem. Just be a Little Creature™️. He sees a bat-shaped piece of metal at his feet. He knows exactly what a Little Creature™️ would do in this scenario.

He hits it.

Then he hits it again.

Then he hits it again, and again, and again and again and again and he grabs it and bites it and rolls around with it and tail slaps it and bites it and bites it and bites it and bites it and then he almost gets stepped on.

Danny looks up from his toy to see the kid dressed as a traffic light staring down at him. The kid tries to grab the toy away from Danny only to be met by the fierce batting of his little paws. The kid moves his hand close a couple more times, and each time he’s fought off valiantly by Danny’s little paw smacks. He’s not sure why the kid looks like he’s smiling when he’s so clearly losing this battle. The kid gets distracted by the guy in the bat costume calling out to him, and Danny takes this opportunity to continue biting the bat toy, rolling with it and biting it and batting it and biting it and why is he being carried away by the kid.

Danny looks around and sees that the kid is carrying him into a big plane being piloted by the guy in the bat suit. Then he’s shoved under the kid’s cape, and he doesn’t really see too much for a few minutes. He chirps at the kid, and is met with a soft yet quick “shhh!” He waits until he can feel the plane they’re in take off to peek out of the cape and look out the window.

He can see the large pool— though it’s more of a pit, now that he sees the whole thing— that he arrived through, as well as a bunch of people running away from it. Not sure why though, it’s just a bubbling—

Ah.

It blew up.

… Danny hides a bit further in the cape, clutching his bat toy a little tighter. He wound up in a very comfortable position, which made him just… a little sleepy…

Danny woke up wrapped in the cape, held by the kid, surrounded by a shocking number of people all yelling something about a “tiny pet pit demon.”

writing for me only exists in extremes either it's like pulling out each of your teeth with pliers one by one or it's like having to perform an exorcism before it bursts out of your chest and splatters across the page like some newborn beast clawing its way into the light

Posting the final chapter of a fic is always a mixture of sadness that it’s over but also pride that you made it. You wrote a thing nobody else in the world has written ever

"It doesn't work like that for me, I could get ARRESTED,"

"Jail is temporary, death is forever,"

"Easy for you to say, you're the Grim Reaper,"

"Sounds like a skill issue, tbh,"

"Did you just say tbh OUT LOUD?!"

“If you kill a killer the number of killers stays the same.” “Just kill two, hell i killed like 17 today.”