With The Sucess Of My Last Boyfriend Catalogue, I Thought I’d Offer You Guys Another One

on “cringe” hobbies

1. you don’t get to choose how other people have fun.

2. reread item 1.

3. shut up.

One Piece chapter 2483

Oda on his deathbed: You want the ending? You can have it. I left it all in one place, now you just have to draw it

Assistants: oDA-sENSeI nO

we should just start writing our text posts like youtubers

Practicing for my first open mic this weekend. Feedback appreciated!

me: *taking an exam* please focu–

my brain: u know how old people say shit like “you’re so cute I could just eat you up”???????? that is some WEIRD and unecessary shit like..Martha wheres ya deviantart account at lmao 

me:

mime owners: this is claude st. pierre, we adopted him two years ago. he’s a third generation french mime with roots in the early carnie awakening. we only feed him hand toasted vegan peanuts and paleo candy floss

fool owners: this is hoops he likes jokes