Things I Say That Confuse And Worry My Coworkers:

Garden God

…as they posted that picture from their “modern prison” 🙄

me: *orders takeout* me: *drives 5 hours to the nearest large body of water* me: *lays open food gently into water* me: aesthetic

floccinaucinihilipilificationa is my soul

no shit sherlock

part of the Jesus fandom and yes it is right on the nose

My FB feed is pretty good tonight

*sees some wild shit on my dash* aye what the f.. oh its just that one mutual nothin to see here keep it movin

I babysat this girl tonight and she was really excited to show me the part in mario odyssey where you can play as a t-rex and when she’s playing as the t-rex she’s like “I gotta watch out for those little spikey guys cause they’ll kill me. just kidding I’m a dinosaur” and then she told the alexa to fart

BLOCK 100

HEAVY ARMOR 100

Behind the scenes of Star Wars Episodes l, ll, and lll