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You are born with the ability to see whether people listen more often to the angel or the devil on their shoulder, based on the opacity of each- if they listen more to the angel, it’s more solid and the demon is more transparent, and vice versa. You recently met a guy online and you’re finally going to meet. You go in for a handshake and glance at his shoulders, but you can’t see the angel. Only a solid demon.

[Music I Write Sins Not Tragedies]

Brendon: [singing] “ What a shame! The poor groom’s bride is [shouts] JOHN CENA!”

Whenever I look back on the early episodes of Avatar: the Last Airbender, I realize that Iroh was probably acting a little ridiculous on purpose. He knows that Zuko still has fresh emotional wounds from his cruel, uncompromising father and sadistic sister, and the one source of softness and warmth in his life, his mother, is long gone. Iroh always tried to be a friend to Zuko, but now that his nephew has been scarred and banished, he tries to be goofy and funny and carefree so desperately hard because all he wants is for Zuko to smile and relax again.  If making a fool out of himself is what he has to do, he’d do it a hundred times over.

Are you sure?

When the disrespect is real

STOP SCROLLING

straighten your back, mate

NOW GO ON

Peppa Pig is not here for your lying ass, Susie Sheep.

me: now that lectures are over i can finally play video games all day

someone else: but isn't that what you've been doing anyway

me: yeah but now i can do it without feeling guilty about it

*me at a driving lesson*

Me: so how exactly do you do drift?

Instructor: what?

Me: you know, like the jump then you drift like in Mario kart, also where are all the item boxes?

au where mrs o’leary is a giant chow chow