I Know I’m Not Someone Who Shares My Sexuality On Here But I Need Help.

anyways,, hi guys i took a dna test last month. its been 2-3 weeks right?? i got results.

interestingly i woke up, and thought “lemme check one last time” and all I saw was waiting in transit.

and then randomly, my momma got an email and says it sent us a notification that it REACHED the lab, analysed & said the results MAY verify but the results will come through. their currently analysing my sample right now oh my god

they are so fucking scam on this shit. it said it will take 6 weeks and guess what? it will ACTUALLY be ready on April 28th TO may 12th. thats like more than 6 fucking weeks BUT either way not complaining 😭😭 im so excited

life is so good right now

been dying to know the sides of my moms family but I know too much of my moms side and still want to know more, so we agreed to the 23andme kit and now we r waiting for the results which takes 5-6 weeks

but once of my uncles, are updating us about digging our family tree and right now, he is saying there is too many mixes in my dads family

bro said that. MY DADS side. has senegalese. swiss. italian. spanish. sweden.

thats the most recent we found and my dad sadly died so I couldnt get to ask him anything.

but being italian and spanish is shocking because he did make me visit his spanish side. my mom said EVERY time she is in that mfing house she IS ALWAYS seeing a flag that has red white and green. she didnt know what that was. but like. ITS THE WAY I WAS THINKING ABOUT VISITING SWITZERLAND AND WANTED TO LIVE THERE in the FUTURE and then boom, a gene has been found.

i love being mixed

I hate saying this but y'all i need a bit of help here (anyone who's lgbtq)

I'm gonna share my experiences a bit (not top much just a little) & worries so peacefully talk to me nicely.

I'm gonna do my labels journey separately so enjoy reading.

Again I'm not gonna show or say too much.

me trying out the lesbian label (I've tried this out for 2 weeks now?) + experiences

my journey in 2 weeks w the lesbian label !

signs of my attraction w the label 🏷 .

🦢 : when i would watch the film of lgbtq people on Netflix (a few months back) for the first ever time and I would always focus on the female characters.

And I would always think "do i like her romantically? Or in a nice way?"

🦢 : i would play this game (the new one) called splatoon 2 & 3 and I would always have a crush on the female characters. I remember when I was playing the solo mode and every time I would win, I would see her do a certain pose (I'm not trying to be sexual with the character when saying this, I'm just trying to express my feelings of her), she had her body out and I would always stare at it and feel flustered. Have a huge tightening in my chest and my heart heavy.

🦢 : i remember during the game, i would see the octo boy and think “wow he is so cute”. now when i was younger (like 2 - 3 years back), i would always think “i wish he was real. I would like be his friend” and developed feelings (NOT a sexual or a romantic one, a platonic one that's strong like as a friend). I used to have a crush on him but I dont anymore now. I'm just attracted as a friend. (Lesbians have crushes on unattainable men like fictional characters and all but mine isn't a fictional character but a game one)

🦢 : I started identifying with the lesbian label more when I had strong feelings for the female character. Every time I would go on solo mode story playing as her, I instantly stare at her body and think, “shes so cute i love her” but at the same/at the time (still now), i never had a crush on the male characters anymore nor not as much. Like I found both inkling & octos cute (male ones) but I wouldn't feel like dating them (as like any human would do with irl people)

🦢 : I would always make those sounds (like the exciting ones) when I would see her make a little face when she gets a win (her smile is so cute I cant) and I would be like “FUCK STOP BEING SO CUTE ITS KILLING ME” and instant blushing constantly.

🦢 : I remember when I would find the saiki k character cute but I didn't have anything with him. I was mainly focusing on kokomi and teruhashi.

🦢 : I think this one is the biggest lesbian sign from me is looking. at. girls. Just their body, their part (their upper) or just their ass. Like I would always walk past and when I see a pretty girl (this happened YESTERDAY when walking to a store) and I looked at her quickly since her lovely perfume walked past, and went, “huuhooo” (whistle sound ik but it was a silent one).

She noticed me smiling but God.

Her perfume.

Just why. Are you. So cute.

And a bonus: 🦢 I nearly kissed my female best friend when she liked the same things as me. I literally hugged her when crying and almost kissed her when she had to go (yesterday ofc different girl)

(Splatoon 2 & 3 is a good game so please check it out and the anime saiki k !)

so this is my journey identifying as it.

And I still do.

i’m actually fuming like so much right now

my family saw my gallery w how much I liked women and that im queer

and NOW they’re fucking outing me???

my sis is calling me a lesbian as a fucking insult and my WHOLE family is forcing me to come out

“oh you just came out of the closet” no i fucking didn’t?? i chose to stay closeted bc y’all wouldn’t stop labeling me and calling me horrible insults.

now i have to spend my WHOLE christmas going to cry because im being OUTED. AGAIN.

AGAIN??? and I even said I don’t own them shit and now they’re just outing me completely. telling all my family members about it, even my mom assumes i “ like ” pussy like wtf??

“you didn't even try yourself out w a man yet” I don’t need to knowing that im gay already?? how about you do it to know if youre gay too??

I just didn’t like men from a young age and I would force myself to. no matter how I would try to, I just fucking COULDNT get it.

now youre assuming im turning myself gay just because i chose to stay closeted??

“i saw your snaps and it mentioned that you like women so dont be scared”

tf you mean ”don’t be scared” bruh you out me every time to people putting me in danger.

now I have to fucking stand there, worrying im faking this and hoping to god NONE of my mates from the place I work at, TELLS them that i am QUEER.

oh my fucking god.

and whats worst is that i literally got outed yesterday and I can no longer hide from it cause it’s true and they know?$^%!^!)

i HATE people.

i shouldn't have fucking done any of this.

next time im never putting gay shit in my gallery AGAIN.

i feel so shit oh my god.

but merry fucking christmas guys.

itaewon tragedy was so messed up :(( i cried yesterday

50000 likes!

YESSSSSS I HIT THAT MILSTONE AYYYEEEEE

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEARRR 🎆🎉🧧🫶🐰

yesterday i found 3 stripes of rainbow.

Someone shouted “omfg a rainbow!!” and i FREAKED out

then on my left, 5 stripes, my right, another 3.

at the back behind me, i saw 2.

then it faded away.

although + at lunch, i found 2 again then at home to leave, i found 2 at the window, and another one at night.

IT WAS RAINING THAT WHOLE ENTIRE DAY YESTERDAY LMFAO

THANK YOU NINTENDO BECAUSE I AM IN LOVE W SONIA SHES SO CUTE ???

Everyone say thank you Nintendo for giving Hyrule the hottest founders

YESSSS GAYSS WOONNNNNN!!!!!!! /pos /pos /pos /pos