I Pierce My Tongue Through The Night

I’m not scared of loving you; I’m just scared of losing you.

Dear Guardian Angel,

My gums are bleeding

I still haven't eaten

Do you pity me?

Please don't

I do this to myself

I self sabotage when things get better and act like it's the end of the world

I dug my own grave

Do you feel anything at all…

You were assigned to me

I'm sorry

My observer

For all the things you've seen

For all my thoughts you hear

For all the words I utter

And still I hope you can see that this is not truly me

I am is whatever I've seen on tv

I'm a chameleon

I put on a new mask and change it when it cracks

I'm lost

Who am I?

I’m gone

Or am I just done

Sitting with my thoughts alone

In this empty home

Father ignores and mothers on the other side of the world

I'm sure you already know

I mean you know me better than me

Stuck in my apocalypse

Hollow, dark, empty, incomplete, disguised, loveless

Distorted with the painful echo of my screams and cries.

Begging for an escape from my capturer

Me.

Somehow, I still love you more.

I don't know what to do anymore

I'm crying day and night

Yet still somehow I have the will to wake up on the

Last third of the night

To pray for your health and safety

Please give me a sign

I'm lost please find me

I love him

Everytime I try to forget you, god brings me back to you everytime

I love you

It hurts

It won't stop

I've prayed

Instead, my heart yearns harder than before

I love you

It's you

It's always been you

Only you

Always you

Sometimes I don't know why I'm crying

I say i miss you but I've never met you

I don't know you

And you don't know me

But I can feel it in heart and soul

That one day we’ll meet

That we’re destined to be together before everything was written before the beginning of time

My angel

My love

I can't wait for hello

I can't wait to feel your touch

I can't wait to be in your warm embrace

One day instead of my poems or letter

Being written on here

I'll write to you

I only look for you

Only you

I only yearn for you

Only you

I only wait for you

Only you

I only pray for you

Only you

I only love you

Only you

I can't wait to met you

My Muse

My other half

I love you

Filled with rage

I have an upset stomach and little girls despondent laughter sounds louder on stage

Choke me just enough for me to breathe so I stay engaged

Ticking Tok on the clock, you're an ethereal timepiece in this age

Turn me over like a page do me like that when you’re offstage

While your fans fight to be front row in the barricade

I know they’d kill for this exchange

I'm off the rails some may call me deranged but I'm just off my meds

Living a teenage rampage drugged with your love

Will we last or be another short story?

You cry, outraged at the thought of me leaving estranged, so you keep me in range

Afraid I'll let go when the feeling subsides

I left my shoes in the street so you could carry me

Don't worry, darling, you have my heart in a cage

You're the lighthouse in the middle of this enraged storm

Filled with love

@rbhvleo // roberto ferri // mothering by ainslie hogarth // rainer maria rilke // ? // planet of love by richard siken // a self portrait in letters by anne sexton // indian summer by ron hicks

I cried again tonight. I thought I could get through the night but my tears kept on falling. I've lost count. I don't know why I'm like this. Why do you make me like this? Can't you just stay as a fond memory and let me live? Even so, I'll always be yours no matter how many times I try to block you out. I always come back here to write about you.

My la verità.

I go to sleep to the thought of you. One day we will meet, and I will love you forever. My one and only. My other half. My Muse. My love.

My hairs stand tall from the thought of you

You fill the empty space once filled with tears

This burdened soul can not house another

My heart is heavy and stained with pain

You look at me with bleeding eyes, mine colder than ice

Emotionless but you make me feel alive

But I'm still distant in confined solitude

I want to see your point of view

Maybe then I could love me too

You're crescent moon eyes and crooked front teeth are my favourite

Never hide that beautiful smile

It brings light to my day

My Muse

Took you like a shot, thought that I could chase

You with a cold evening.

Let a couple years water down

how I'm feeling about you

You could break my heart in two

But when it heals it beats for you

I know it's forward but its true

I wanna hold you when I'm not supposed to

You're stuck in my head

and I can't get you out of it

If I could do it all again

I know I'd go back to you

You know my thoughts are

running loose

It's just a thing you make me do

And I could fight but what’s the use

Won't lie, I'd go back to you.

My moon.