Tonight My Mood.... To Press Myself Against Your Chest, Let The Emotions Out, As I Soak In Your Protective

If you get deep enough, real enough, learn each other completely, then there is no hiding.

They can feel your aura, they can read your silence, put together thoughts in words unsaid.

This level is scary at first, but so very beautiful.

Moon.....

“I am a shadow’s shade, a lunatic, perhaps, of two dark moons.”

Full cold moon by Eurokinissi

Moon.....

I yearn to take you to the beach, where you can be truly free, let you be lost in the ryrhmic sounds of the water lapping onto the smooth sand.

The wind lifting up the scents of salt and seaweed, fine particles of dry sand cling faintly on your skin.

To let you rest under the sun.

To see you swim in the water.

To watch you fall asleep with book on the shore.

To have night, overtake the day, to need to layer up on clothes, to watch the beautiful moonlight, caress the surface of the waves.

To have a small fire near by, it's tendrils of smoke weaving into the darkness.

To cling to you, to bury myself deep inside you, to make love to you, under the stars, our sounds going unheard, except to Mother nature, to get lost into each other in the moment.

“I find the sea to be both a natural expression of our human world, and a healing balm for it.” By pastel artist Jeanne Rosier Smith.

That just about says it all..... It's why I try to say it often

I'm on my knees.... Reaching up to the moon tonight.

Offering myself for her full embrace.

I crave you already....

My moon

My moon shines for me.

I look from below, darkness clawing at my body.

I feel the icy fingers of self doubt.

I feel the heat of the blade of my own hatred taking ever opportunity to bury itself into my brain.

Before you I was on a path so empty.

Without you I'm lost, a broken compass, taking on water in the storms I chose to sail.

You believe in me.

I take your hand.

I'll wound you. I'll hurt you. I'll make you have moments of doubt, and unneeded pain.

I can pretend it's obsessive behavior, my need for validation, my weak value in myself.

Ultimately I can't follow that wire the one that ends at my mouth, the puppet of my mind, I look deep to find the source to see where the wire originates... If I had my way, I'd rip that fucker so hard out of my body and pray I was the man I wish I was with you.

I can't.

All I can promise is every mile down our path, every word spoken between us, every moment you give me your time, that I'll spend it showing you my love, my respect, I'll cut you when you need it, I'll care for you after, I'll strive to put you first and try to get you to feel it every day I am allowed.

All I can promise is I'll try to wear out that connection, to pull and wiggle, to break the internal connection, to render that wire useless, or all least render it unable to control it, with the force it has.

I value the moonlight that shines on me.

art by Mar A