The Group Chat When I Ask Whos Available To Hang Out Next Week

Witnesses in murder mysteries: yeah sure i can tell you everything about that waiter helping me out a couple of years ago who had nothing special about them whatsoever other than being Extremely Important To The Whole Plot

Also witnesses in murder mysteries: i think i saw someone?? I suppose it was… a person? but i’m not sure? It was so, so dark and i am so, so nearsighted… But i saw them sometime around six or seven, or maybe eight, even closer to nine… I don’t know, all the clocks in this house are wrong and i don’t give a damn about time or space or anything really... I do hope you catch the murderer tho

You are a monster!!

And you a lawyer, "nobody is perfect" 🩸🦇

Behind the scenes pics are the cinema equivalent of final bows in theatre as both say "hey, it’s okay, all of this was made up, we all are actually alive, healthy, happy, we all are friends & had a lot of fun, it’s so cool that you like us"

I outgrew Harry & Ron & Hermione… And Alisa Seleznyova… And the Pevensies… And Kalle Blomkvist…

*sheds a tear*

the fact that i'm no longer the same age as the protagonists of novels and films i once connected to is so heartbreaking. there was a time when I looked forward to turning their age. i did. and i also outgrew them. i continue to age, but they don't; never will. the immortality of fiction is beautiful, but cruel.

Iconic cop duos from my fandoms, from okay to best Anderson & Donovan (BBC Sherlock): 🤨❔👌

Hank & Gomie (Breaking Bad): 🤷🏻‍♀️🆒👍

Fred & Nobby (Discworld): 👏🤪😂

Ryan & Esposito (ABC Castle): ☺️💕🤗🫂✨👑

"why can't they just be friends" not in the homophobic way but in the "their platonic relationship in the source material is far more dynamic and complex than the sanitized personalities they gain as a result of shipping" way

If you think that you’re a horrible person and no one will ever love you, just remember that there are certain BrBa fans out there shipping themselves with Tuco Salamanca and he’s practically as bad a person as humanly possible

People are so stupid about snakes. If there's a little black racer chilling outside just leave it alone, you don't have to kill it, it's probably dealing with all your pests for you, jesus christ

This is exactly why I keep telling people:

Read. Terry. Pratchett. Books.

And if you already have… well, reread them after a good while to have a new understanding of them.

Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just: Here's a funny little joke Here's something that you can tell is a joke but don't get and will only figure out five years later Here's a surprisingly cool fantasy concept Here's a unique and well written simile Here's a lil guy Here's something that has aged depressingly well into the modern day Here's something that has aged remarkably queer into the modern day Here's a character that you can barely understand what he's saying Here is the most terrifying and deeply disturbing concept you have ever heard, casually mentioned Here is the dumbest fucking pun you've ever heard but in the best way Here is a quote so profound that it makes you view morality and the world in a different way Here is a plot twist that you can't tell if it's genius or stupid Congratulations! You've finished the book! It has fundamentally changed you as a person and you will never be the same!

Really, what is canon? There’s just a bunch of movies, shows, books, comics and games of different levels of coolness and some of them contradict each other and sometimes it’s two equally cool versions that contradict each other, so what’s the point of all this? There can be more than one well-written, logical, satisfying story about the same characters in the same universe, and they’re all there for us to enjoy.

Arguments about what's canon and what's not in SW fandom are kinda pointless, I know for a fact that every fan has their personal frankensteined version of canon based on what's best for their own blorbos. I love picking up a random licensed book to sneer at half of its ideas and then steal the rest. Some shows and books and comics and whole movies are simply not incorporated into my belief system. That's how we roll