Nimona Is The Best Movie I’ve Ever Seen And It Was Made For Me Personally.

this is completely relatable tho

twinks fuck up me. cats consume me.

Hope this helps someone

- blue

we are always enough.

there are those who will say we will never be enough.

But the truth is we were always more than enough. And they hate us for it.

once i saw a specter

inside a mirror.

i want to know if he was a memory

I come back here when things are hard. So in spite of previous posts, please believe me when i say,

things have been better.

I’ve always said things do get better. And I’ve always been right about that. You know, he’s repeated those words to me. That brought a smile to my face. And I am still right.

I’m thinking of the nights when I used to break apart in my bed. A pain in my heart so palpable it scarred my skin. And then days passed. Years even. And the wounds healed and the days were bright and I found happiness again.

I haven’t felt pain like that again. And I don’t think I ever could. I know too deeply that I am beautiful and loved, for that ache to return.

It does get better.

Always.

~

However, I still get tired. And frightened. And sad. Right now I feel that.

The world feels like it crumbles beneath my fingertips. I believe in love. In safety. And my assurances fall away like dry sand. Every day scrapes by like a wounded soldier, dragging himself home.

I apologize for being so dramatic, to you the empty void. I’ve been missing love for so long.

And It’s always felt too good for me.

You know, in church we used to sing hymns? Horrible things. Monotone and droning. And there they’d weave their messages for me. A wretch they sang, working my mouth with needle and string. Sewing words in hungry earth, that blossomed into an endless fear.

A wretch. That I was not good enough for any type of love, except for love from a being you can not see, can not hear, and can not touch.

And my fear grows. Am I loved?

Am I loved? Am I loved? Am I loved? Am I loved? Am I loved? AmIlovedamilovedamilovedamiloved oh please god let me be loved.

one day i make a post declaring thoughts struck down to me by gods

the next i wanna talk about how if i were a little hamster i would simply grab my little feet and roll everywhere like i were the hamster ball that tried to contain me.

nothing can hold me

Happy Day of the rainbow people! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ We are all so fucking awesome and are making it through the hardest shit with PIZAZZ. Simply spectacular ✨

So, a reminder to all my fellow struggling queers, we are valid, real, amazing, and gonna kick those homophobic/transphobic motherfuckers asses!

Celebrate yourself. You deserve it. You deserve respect (and may even command it!) Most of all we all deserve love ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ Happy Pride Month! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

i am atrocious with people

so truly bad at it.

Because I can be the smoothest motherfucker around- IF i don’t really care about the people’s opinions.

As soon as I start to actually like the person and look for approval. That’s when things go to shit. I start worrying about everything.

I’ve been advised that just “going for it” is the best approach. I am going to do that in spite of my incredibly and inexorable chaotically fearful habits.

hhh wish me luck.