Emo Boy Batman Is My Everything

dick grayson really out there surviving bullets to the head while jason straight up died from a punch, plot armor is truly something

was messing with some fake tweet makers and the idea that dick just uses twitter to compliment and flirt with himself hit me and i couldn’t stop til i made it.

Bruce wakes up on his birthday and sees a giant framed poster hanging on his wall:

Bruce: Okay.

--

Bruce, shuffling over to the table where his kids are waiting for his birthday breakfast: I saw your gift.

Cass: Do you like it? I put “awesome.”

Damian: I put “Batman.”

Tim: I put “neurotic.”

Bruce, grabbing a some sausage links and a muffin and shoving them into his robe pocket: I’m…*yawn* mostly wondering who called me a unicycle.

Batkids: *eyeballing each other*

Bruce, slumping back out of the room, yawning again: Thanks for the birthday meal, g’night.

Batkids:

Dick: So who—

Duke, jumping to his feet: LOOK I panicked okay I was the last one to pick and couldn't think of a word for U! Jason stop laughing—

The Batman (2022) + text posts part 2

Bonus:

Jason, walking into a jl meeting in full Red Hood gear with a suspiciously stained green apron on top: I've got a homemade, iced chocolate milk with a splash of coffee, extra whipped cream and chocolate syrup for 'batman'?

Bruce: I asked for someone to make coffee. at the cave, Hood

Jason, audibly smirking while handing Bruce the cup: this is coffee! just the way you like it! and I figured I'd deliver it, you know. to be nice, show you how much I care

Bruce, giving the cup a resigned stare: thank you, Hood.

Jason: of course B! also, just wanted to say thanks for buying me that new motorcycle!

Bruce, with a pained squeak: I ... didn't buy you a motorcycle?

Jason, clapping him on the shoulder: well technically yeah, but I used your card to buy it, so also, technically you did.

Bruce:

Jason: later dad! *casually walks out of the meeting room like he didnt just 'break into' the watchtower*

Bruce: *fond tired dad sigh*

the jl:

Bruce: *starts slurping the drink*

hal: what THE FUCK just happened?!

later:

Jason, strutting back into the batcave: I did it, pay up bitches.

Steph: no way, I call bull. there no way you went through with it!

Jason: my helmet footage says otherwise, Blondie

*collective groaning from the batfam as they all go to get their wallets*

Jason Todd icons

like if you save

Robin and Green Arrow spotted at the Star City Robin Hood kin fanclub meet

guys idek what to say i'm speechless,,, only thing i can say right now is that i'm so glad that i'm caught up with the manga because it's only going to get crazier from here on out and i'm all for it

i'm also going to drop this here very casually...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE MOST INFLUENTIAL ALBUM OF THE MODERN AGE