Lifehack: When You See A Take One Candy Bowl In A Restaurant, Wait Until Noones Looking And Shovel Candy

Little boy standing in the stroller just looked around the crowded coffee shop, pointed at me and asked his mom "What's HIS name" and his mom said "I don't know!" and he asked me "What's YOUR name" and I called back "I'm Al" across the whole coffee shop and he went "HI AL!"

What is it about laying on the floor when you're overwhelmed that makes everything feel so much better?

the dubious philosophy of salmon

“Many people seem to think it foolish, even superstitious, to believe that the world could still change for the better. And it is true that in winter it is sometimes so bitingly cold that one is tempted to say, ‘What do I care if there is a summer; its warmth is no help to me now.’ Yes, evil often seems to surpass good. But then, in spite of us, and without our permission, there comes at last an end to the bitter frosts. One morning the wind turns, and there is a thaw. And so I must still have hope.”

— Vincent Van Gogh

the fact that we only have “herculean task” and “sisyphean task” feels so limiting. so here’s a few more tasks for your repertoire

icarian task: when you have a task you know you’re going to fail at anyways, so why not have some fun with it before it all comes crashing down

cassandrean task: when you have to deal with people you KNOW won’t listen to you, despite having accurate information, and having to watch them fumble about when you told them the solution from the start (most often witnessed in customer service)

feel free to chime in i ran out of ideas much faster than i anticipated

hope is a skill

beautifully said. 💜

original

Alright girls, you know what we need to do

the "came back wrong" trope except like... they didnt. like this mad scientists wife died, and so he studied necromancy, brought her back, and she came back and it all worked. like she came back exactly the same as she was before with literally no difference. but the scientist guy is like "oh no... what have i done.... shes Different now!!!! she came back Wrong!!!!" and shes just like. chilling. reading a book. cooking dinner. shes just so so normal but in the guys mind hes like "oh shes soooo weird" but shes just normal

well maybe if adoption was more accessible to single parents and lesbian couples, witches wouldn’t have to go haggling for people’s firstborns