"Remember That Photo From Middle School? The One With The Sweater?"

"Remember that photo from middle school? The one with the sweater?"

"WHY ARE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS?"

"Because it's funny."

The heroโ€™s secret identity is revealed. Surprisingly, their enemies have enough honor to not go after their loved ones or lord over their personal life.

More Posts from Idioticswitcher and Others

1 year ago
msn.com
MSN

DON'T LET THIS GO OUT OF CIRCULATION. ADD MORE ONTO IT. QUEUE IT. DON'T LET THIS SITE FUCKING FORGET. THIS TRIAL COULD HAVE MASSIVE CONSEQUENCES FOR THE WHOLE INTERNET.

8 months ago
Gods
Gods
Gods
Gods
Gods
Gods
Gods
Gods

Gods

1 year ago

Oath of the Courier

A paladin subclass for 5e

A slightly vibrating gif of the Peregrine Mendicant/Parcel Mistress from Homestuck (a white chesswoman wearing grey rags) wearing a blue postal worker's hat, holding up a partially-singed envelope. A single tear rolls down her cheek as she holds the envelop aloft, filled with determination to deliver it. The background is a collage of other pieces of mail.

Liberty. Reason. Justice. Civility. Edification. Perfection.

MAIL.

Tenets of the Courier

The Tenets of the Courier embody a paladin's commitment to delivering the mail with utmost integrity and professionalism.

Handle with Care: Treat anything entrusted to you as preciously as you would your own possessions.

Discrete Delivery: When others confide in you, do not betray their trust. Let none but the intended recipient pry upon what you carry.

Swift Postage: Do your best to fulfill your promises as promptly as possible. Punctuality is a virtue.

To the Letter: Strive to fulfill your oaths exactly as you pledged them. Your word is your promise.

Oath Spells

You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.

3rd Level: Expeditious Retreat, Illusory Script 5th Level: Animal Messenger, Arcane Lock 9th Level: Sending, Tongues 13th Level: Legally Distinct Secret Chest, Freedom of Movement 17th Level: Dream, Teleportation Circle

Channel Divinity

When you choose this Oath at 3rd-level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options:

Postage Stamp: As an action, you mark an object with a magical postage stamp. When creating this stamp, you choose a creature you or an adjacent ally are familiar with to be the object's recipient. This stamp persists for a number of hours equal to twice your paladin level, until the stamped object is delivered to its chosen recipient, or it is dismissed as a bonus action. While holding the stamped object, you can spend an action to magically detect what direction its recipient is in, and approximately how far away they are from you. If the recipient does not want to be located by you, it can make a Wisdom Saving Throw to elude this detection. If you are relying on an ally's familiarity, they get Advantage on this save. If they succeed, they are immune to this effect for 24 hours. You may only have one magical stamp at a time. If you place another, the previous one is immediately dismissed.

This Side Up: As an action, you can use your Channel Divinity to ward a creature or object against toppling. One creature or object within 10 feet becomes immune to the Prone condition. If the target is an object, it must be light enough for you to carry. If the target is an object, it gains Resistance to bludgeoning, force, and thunder damage. If the warded creature or object falls, it may ignore the first 10' of the fall when determining fall damage. These effects last for a number of minutes equal to your Charisma score, minimum 3.

A gif of Mr. McFeely (left) and Mr. Rogers (right) standing in front of a window in Mr. Rogers home. Mr. McFeely is wearing his deliveryman uniform - a grey suit with a "Speedy Delivery" logo on the left breast, a black bow tie, and a hat. Mr. Rogers is wearing a dark purple sweater over a shirt and tie. Mr. McFeely is making slightly exaggerated speaking gestures as he says the words captioned in the gif: "Speed Delivery!" while Mr. Rodgers cheerfully nods next to him.

Aura of Determination

Neither rain nor sleet nor hail will stop your delivery of the mail. Starting at 7th level, you emit an Aura of Determination. You and allies within 10' cannot have their speed reduced to less than their base speed when walking, crawling, jumping, or flying. This includes anything that would halve movement, such as Difficult Terrain or Exhaustion; or impose any other fraction-based penalty to speed. You cannot grant any of these effects while you are unconscious.

At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet.

Return to Sender

Starting at 15th level, if you are targeted by a spell that targets only you, you may use your Reaction to instead have the spell target its caster. Use the original caster's Spell Save DC, Spell Attack Bonus, and Spellcasting Ability where applicable. If the spell required a Spell Attack Roll, re-roll the attack versus the caster. Once you use this ability, you must finish a short or long rest before you can use it again.

Pen Pal

At 20th level, you can assume the form of a celestial courier. Using your action, you undergo a transformation that grants you the following benefits for 1 hour:

Wings sprout from your back and grant you a flying speed of 60 feet.

Allies who begin their turn within 30' of you gain a 10' bonus to their speed that turn.

Add your Charisma bonus to your Initiative Rolls.

Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.

A gif of Norman Reedus's character in Death Stranding, Sam Porter Bridges, running down a hillside. He is wearing blue rain gear, and has several large cases strapped to his back. The camera zooms across the landscape to follow Sam as he hurriedly makes his way downhill towards a foggy background. The hills are grassy but have several steep, rocky sections. A seaside settlement of some kind is barely visible in the fog beyond.

Go forth, swift and trustworthy courier! You are the glue that holds society together!

3 months ago

IS THAT DR.PHOSPHORUS BIG NATURALS!

(Last picture)

The Creature Commandos Brainrot Goes Hard
The Creature Commandos Brainrot Goes Hard
The Creature Commandos Brainrot Goes Hard
The Creature Commandos Brainrot Goes Hard
The Creature Commandos Brainrot Goes Hard

the creature commandos brainrot goes hard

Phosphorus just needs a strap I think

i also drew nosferata but like if I had a say because shes lowk buns in the show

1 year ago

Reblog if you think asexuality is a legitimate sexuality.

I'm trying to prove something.

1 year ago
Follow Forthefuns For More Funny Stuff

follow forthefuns for more funny stuff

11 months ago
๐Ÿ’Ž ๐—ก๐—ฒ๐˜„ ๐—ถ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—บ! Volcanic Ocarinaโ€จWondrous Item, Rare ___

๐Ÿ’Ž ๐—ก๐—ฒ๐˜„ ๐—ถ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—บ! Volcanic Ocarinaโ€จWondrous item, rare ___

This stone ocarina is always hot to the touch. When playing it, harmless molten rock spews upward from any uncovered finger hole.

There are three magical melodies that can be played on the ocarina, which each create a different volcanic effect. Once a melody has been played, the ocarina shouldnโ€™t be used to play one of these melodies again until the next dawn. Each time it is used to play such a melody again before then, the ocarina has a cumulative 20 percent chance of not working and dissolving into molten rock in your hands, destroying itself and dealing 5d10 fire damage to you when this occurs.

๐™€๐™ง๐™ช๐™ฅ๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™œ ๐™ˆ๐™š๐™ก๐™ค๐™™๐™ฎ. When you play this melody, choose four different points on the ground that you can see within 60 feet of you. A pillar of flame bursts upward from each point, provided that the ocarinaโ€™s sound can reach it. A creature within 5 feet of each point must make a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw. A creature takes 6d6 fire damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one. A creature in the area of more than one of these eruptions is affected only once.

๐™ˆ๐™ค๐™ก๐™ฉ๐™š๐™ฃ ๐™ˆ๐™š๐™ก๐™ค๐™™๐™ฎ. When you play this melody, choose a stone or earthen structure that you can see within 60 feet of you. If the sound of the ocarina can reach the structure, it harmlessly dissolves into a pile of molten earth, which immediately cools at the end of the effect. The dissolved area of the structure can be no larger than 10 feet in any dimension.

๐™Ž๐™š๐™ž๐™จ๐™ข๐™ž๐™˜ ๐™ˆ๐™š๐™ก๐™ค๐™™๐™ฎ. When you play this melody, choose a point on the ground that you can see within 60 feet of you. The ground then shakes, like an earthquake, in a 20-foot-radius circle thatโ€™s centered on that pointโ€ฆ.

โ€ฆ Continued in the comment below! ___

โœจ Patrons get huge perks! Access this and hundreds of other item cards, art files, and compendium entries when you support The Griffonโ€™s Saddlebag on Patreon for less than $10 a month!

10 months ago

Reblog if you're queer, have ADHD, or hate the government.

Nobody needs to know which one.

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idioticswitcher - Probably not a chaos demon
Probably not a chaos demon

Or a Plague Doctor. Yes, I'm 19 Yes, 90% of my posts will be whimsical reblogs

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