Jason: We Can’t Have Salim Come To His Party Yet. The Sign’s Not Finished- It’s Supposed To Say

Jason: Hey, Rachel, have you seen Goncharov?

Rachel: No, what's Goncharov?

Nick: Oh, only my favorite Scorcese movie!

Joey: It's so good, ma'am.

Rachel: Alright, I'll put Goncharov on my list.

Jason: You do that, Rachel.

Rachel: How do you spell it?

Alternatively

Jason: ow! son of a bi-

Salim pointing to Zain: Jason! children!

Jason: … isexual. son of a bisexual.

how dare y'all kill ashley tisdale (also rachel is like the best character fight me she deserves the WORLD and a kiss on the forehead)

Rachel: Why are you smiling? Nick: What, can't I just be happy? Jason: Eric tripped and fell outside.

Jason: Why are you so mad at me? Is it because I slept with your dad?

Zain: YOU WHAT?

Jason: fuck, so it wasn’t that

Jason: How do you know how to kiss? like who teaches you?

Salim: Well it’s actually a class, but sadly it’s full at the moment now.

Salim: Would you like private lessons?

Nick: Damn that was smooth.

kettles

which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?

Zain: *watching TV*

Jason: Ah, you're watching Sailor Moon? I love that anime. The way they just–

Jason: *clenches fist*

Jason: Sail all those fricking moons.

Nick: Are you gonna go talk to Eric?

Rachel: If he really wants to talk to me, he can come to my room. On his hands and knees.

Nick: so… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Salim recently.

Jason: no, Nicky, its not what it looks like, I swear.

Nick: oh really? so no reason for me to be jealous?

Jason: no! you’re the only one for me.

Nick: is that so?

Jason: i promise! Salim and I are just dating, okay? He’s my boyfriend.

Nick: so there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Jason: you are still my one and only best friend! He’s just the love of my life, nothing more!

Nick: but I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Jason: of course bro!

Nick: bro...

Salim: what the-