That Daughterhood Feeling Of Wanting To Blame Your Mother For How You Turned Out, Wanting To Be Angry

i think this is precisely why 'fire walk with me is so powerful':

"Your Laura has dissapeared. It's just me now" we see a her whisper tearfully to James Hurley. She knows. She knows she's fizzling out, not like a match blowing off, but like a supernova, Laura is screaming, blowing up into the void with incandescent fury, but she's too far from us to see. Like a dying star, the light that reaches us is no longer tied to it's source, it's vanished, we're only left with the remains

laura palmer is such an insane character it’s like her absence is more important than her presence and she doesn’t exist it’s only this reflection of her that other people tell and the person that they want her to be the person she’s incapable of being like there is no story without her but there is no story with her either

Some character designs with some…atypical color choices? I guess. I don’t know what’s going on in that area.

This is Nimona and her supervillain friend (He doesn’t have a name yet, I’m working on that). Nimona is his sidekick/squire, they’re like the Batman and Robin of slightly Medieval villains, but she’s actually way more evil than him. He does what he does to make a point, and he doesn’t really want anyone get hurt - Nimona just gets a kick out of destroying stuff.

I’m going to attempt to make a two page comic with them? We’ll see how this goes.

oh the notes bubble is disgusting. get that out of my sight

2024

DO IT SCARED

FUCK IT WE BALL

REMEMBER THAT PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU

MAKE THE CHOICE TO END HARMFUL PATTERNS

LOVE WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART

May I add, I always found weird equalling the RCM with (what I assume is) the American police system, because such an analogy undermines the colonial aspect that pervades the writing of Disco Elysium. The RCM serves as a police body, of course, but it is still in its foundation a Citizens Militia, an (ostensibly) local organization that emerges in the category 5 catasthrope that is the occupation of Revachol by foreign forces. The RCM is formed because no one, (and could be argued, as is done in Disco Elysium!!! not even the RCM itself), can restore a modicum of order in Revachol. It is not a police body that emerges out of a state machinery with the highest security expenditure in the world.

I’ve always disliked the ACAB in the context of DE discourse because I feel it obfuscates motivations of characters like Kim, who voluntarily choose to join the RCM. A man who wears bomber jackets relics of a revolutionary past, yet sympathizes with moralist rhethoric. Kim is not only proudly Revacholian, he also believes in the RCM despite its multiple shortcomings. At the same time Kim suffers more than most the chauvinistic discrimination that usually pervades police bodies. Such contradictory allegiances only make sense in the context of the colonial condition of Kim and of the city of Revachol.

“ACAB”, “the only happy ending should be leaving the RMC”, “you’re a terrible person if you draw/write these characters enjoying the sort of corrupt cop stuff that they canonically do in-game” discourse is killing meeee

God forbid you don’t performatively remind everyone that you do hate cops, actually; and god forbid that you don’t find that True Healing and Happiness for them can only be achieved by leaving the force.

Metas could be written about how Kim and Harry are actually deeply flawed people who enjoy wielding some form of authority in a way that they actually feel best working as cops

(is it healthy? no. is it Good™? no. Is it true to their character? this is where media interpretation comes in)

Metas could be written about how that doesn’t mean ACAB isn’t real, that just means they’re the kind of shitheads (that we, the players, still love) who enjoy being cops

Metas could be written questioning the amount they’d have to change to adapt to a life as civilians, how much and what kind of a push they’d need to go for it,  if it’s change they could even manage, if they could financially survive it, if they could find fulfillment in any other career, at their age

But no. Why waste time on that instead of easy slogans. I mean, we like them, these characters, and we don’t want to feel guilty for liking them, because what does it say about us, then, that we like flawed cops?

(nothing it says nothing it says we played a good nuanced extremely well-written game that skillfully made us like the sort of character whose past actions include sequestering some woman and beating a dude into disability. that’s what it says. i’d even argue that discomfort is part of the point)

I can't believe I'm into Hatecrimes MD now but Jim 'I spend my entire life trying to be as nice and unoffensive as possible' Wilson and Greg 'I go out of my way to be a rude selfish asshole that ignores all social niceties' House have one of the best dynamics I have ever seen in television. Both of them are mortally allergic to opening up about anything ever. House makes this obvious within two minutes of being forced to speak to you, but Wilson will be your husband for years without you ever knowing he has a brother. They drug each other. They're best friends. They're the longest lasting, most important, and most unhealthy relationship in each other's lives. They both constantly trample over any sort of personal boundaries - Wilson because he's obsessed with fixing people, House because he's obsessed with solving puzzles. Wilson makes House to go to his father's funeral so House gets him arrested. They met when House decided to bail a random stranger out of jail because he was bored. They're both in desperate need of therapy but one of them doesn't believe in therapy and the other has deluded himself into believing he's perfectly well adjusted. They live together. 'Genius asshole who has something wrong with him' x 'utterly average guy who has something deeply wrong with him'. 'I can make him worse' x 'I can fix him (consistently fails to fix him)'. Self-absorbed and refuses to comply to the expectations of those around him in any way x selfless to a fault and defines himself by everyone around him. They like monster trucks.

taking a drivers test in 45 minutes very nervy

It's really funny to take Spanish with people from different Spanish-speaking countries, because the ones from South American countries are like "Yeah no one uses vosotros, we don't know what it's doing here" and the ones from Europe are like "If you don't give our beloved second-person plural its due respect, the Hounds will find you"

"How to look good in a dress" or, you know, whatever you want to wear!

(I am definitely not the best person to talk about this, but here we are.)

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“As soon as you begin to ask the question, Who loves me? you are completely screwed, because the next question is How Much? and then it is hundreds of hours later, and you are still hunched over your flowcharts and abacus, trying to decide if you have gotten enough. This is the loneliest job in the world: to be an accountant of the heart. It is late at night. You are by yourself, and all around you, you can hear the sounds of people moving in and out of love, pushing the turnstiles, putting their coins in the slots, paying the price which is asked, which constantly changes. No one knows why.”

— Tony Hoagland, “The Loneliest Job in the World”