When The First Stone's Thrown There's Screaming

Marwan Kenzari (Men’s Health Work-Out)

WICCAN & HULKLING; illust. Nick Robles

Fan edit @scarlet–wiccan for @marvellfashion‘s Valentine’s Day Event: Favorite Couple. What better time for a love reading? :)

Stephen Graham | A Thousand Blows 1x02

I can still make the whole place shimmer...

D.J. COTRONA From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series 2.05 "Bondage"

Writing Tips: How To Show, Not Tell

Have you ever done show and tell in elementary school? Well, in the world of storytelling, showing is more often than not more effective at getting an audience invested than telling. Not everyone seems to understand how important the term "show, don't tell" is. So, for this edition of Writing Tips, I'll go into detail about what it means to show instead of tell, as well as giving tips on how to do it effectively.

When people say "show, don't tell" when it comes to the story, what they mean is to paint a clear picture of what the characters would normally say. Oftentimes, in stories, characters will go on and on about things such as their backstory, how they got so smart/skilled, why they're in the setting and etc.. These long-winded speeches feel empty and superfluous because either they don't add anything to the story or they're just so boring to listen to. Be it showing a character's backstory in a flashback or having the character interact with long-time friends. You do a much better job at establishing the history of the character as well as getting audiences invested. Showing in a story also saves time that would've been spent on a scene that's just filler, such as a pointless cutaway gag or a boring conversation with the antagonist and their minions.

So how does one effectively show in a story instead of tell? Well, let's start by using Hansel and Gretel as an example.

"To kids get lost in the woods and are kidnapped by a witch. They throw the witch in the oven and run all the way home."

Yikes, that was bad 😬. First of all that's a really rushed summary of the story. Second of all, there's no mention of who these kids are, how they got lost or why the witch kidnapped them. Third, and most importantly, how would they know where home is if they were lost im the woods. Let's try again, but this time actually show instead of tell.

"Hansel and his sister Gretel were playing hide and seek just outside their house in the woods. When it was Hansel's turn to hide, he wandered deep into the forest to find a good hiding spot. Suddenly, he came across a clearing, and at the center of it was a large house made of gingerbread. Hansel walked toward the house to see that it was made entirely of candy. His mouth drooled at the glistening peppermint windows, the sparkling gumdrops on the walls, and the rich dark chocolate door. Unable to control himself, Hansel took a bite out of the door and chewed with joy.

Gretel looked all round for her brother before seeing the clearing. She walked towards it before gasping in shock as she saw a pale, boney hand gesture Hansel to come into the house. She picked up a large stick and ran towards the house. Gretel rammed her shoulder against the door and burst it open, leading her directly into the kitchen.

Gretel's face went pale as she gazed at the tall, pale and boney witch in a faded lavender dress and wearing a torn and dusty hat. The witch hisses at Gretel, bearing her razor sharp teeth and untrimmed nails at her. Gretel pointed her stick at the witch, only for the old hag to swat it away. The witch then twiddled her fingers at Gretel and levitated her up in the air.

Gretel looked around and saw Hansel sitting at the table with swirls in his eyes and drool coming out his mouth. Gretel clenched her fists and swung her left foot at the witch's hand. The witch screeched as she clutched her hand and, in turn, releasing Gretel. Gretel ran to her brother and slapped him across the face, snapping him out of his trace. Hansel looked around as he rubbed his head. Gretel then hugged him and grabbed him by the hand.

As they were about to run, the witch slammed her fist on the table and shrieked at them. Hansel looked at the lit oven and then back at Gretel. They both nodded before Hansel grabbed the stick and swung it at the witch. Gretel raced around the table and opened the oven. The witch took the stick from Hansel and snapped it in two before hissing at him. Gretel ran back to her brother and held his hand as they shoved the witch into the oven. Gretel slanmed it shut and Hansel placed a chair under the handle. The witch screamed and banged on the door as Hansel and Gretel ran for their lives out of the gingerbread house.

Gretel led Hansel through the woods as they tried finding their way home. After dashing through the trees, they found their house with their father stepping outside. They ran toward him and gave him a big hug with tears in their eyes. He smiled and hugged them back.

The End"

As you can see, an actual story was being told, how they got into witch's house was clearly explained and how they beat the with was given ample amout of detail. I also took the liberty of not adding dialogue to the story and instead let the actions of the characters speak for themselves. As such, my little rendition of Hansel and Gretel, while short, was far more engaging than the undercooked summary above it.

The best way to show, not tell, in a story is 3 simple words:👏Take👏your👏time. Rushing a story is never a good idea because you have no time to actually tell it. All stories should take as long as the writer needs in order to complete it. To conclude, whenever you're told "show, don't tell," don't waste yours or the audiences time with boring speeches from the characters. Show the audience who these characters are and what your story is about. Thank you so much for reading, and I'll see you soon ;)

LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK 👏👏👏

“I don’t like that this summer was the summer of the girl and people were putting the word ‘girl’ before words like dinner and math and that Barbie and Taylor Swift got popular again bc it’s conforming to society expectations.”

My brothers and sisters in Christ, just because you have diabeties doesn’t mean that other people can’t eat brownies. For me, personally, I don’t like Dungeons and Dragons and it’s now mainstream, but just because I personally don’t like it doesn’t mean other people shouldn’t.

let people enjoy things

Deathtrap (Sidney Lumet, 1982)