Reblog For A Perfect Second Semester
reblog for a perfect second semester
the universe knows you will learn from your first semester mistakes
second semester is when we all get 4.0s
we got this.
reblog to help a friend
More Posts from Fandoms-ruined-my-life-siriusly and Others
Just wanted to share this from Diet Prada on Instagram...
Resources and Donations:
https://www.advancingjustice-aajc.org/
https://www.asianamericanadvocacyfund.org/
http://cpacs.org/
https://www.asianmhc.org/about-us
https://secure.qgiv.com/for/apfund/mobile
https://actionnetwork.org/fundraising/support-georgias-asian-american-community/
https://www.napawf.org/donate
https://www.apalanet.org/
Prompt: David comes home after he had a really shitty day. Like a really bad day. He comes home to their flat and sees Matteo and is like fck it's already feeling better. And thinks that Matteo is really is home, his comfort and that that boy is his forever. And it's just soft and Matteo makes him feel better and yeah
This was such a perfect prompt, I love that idea, all the stresses of the day just fading away and becoming meaningless the minute he sees Matteo. This is kind of that. The stresses got a bit big so they talk it through but he knew it would all be ok the moment he saw Matteo. And Matteo is just the best most supportive boyfriend ever in this an just always in my opinion. Some angst, but a whole lot of comfort to make up for it
David was done, absolutely done. He couldn’t do it anymore, he was finished, it was over, done. He’d just quit. Just like that. Or… not officially, he’d been about five minutes from walking out when fucking Leo came into the open plan to send him home. Because he was getting too emotional whatever the fuck that meant.
Fucking Leo nineteen years old and only there because his father had given him the job. No talent, no passion, didn’t even care. David had been there three and a half years and had nothing to show for it. So he’d walked out, with no plan of returning. No plan at all. He didn’t think they were expecting him back so that was that.
Three and a half years. It was only supposed to be a starting point, just a step up for him to get something bigger. He wanted to make real movies not these silly little forgotten videos for mass consumption. They were fun and he would even enjoy it if it wasn’t for the company, the pressure, his bosses. He hated it. Every day he dreaded it, every night he was so relieved to leave.
He got off the bus and stopped dead. Fuck what had he done? He’d just quit his fucking job without a plan or anything. God, what were they going to do? They had rent, bills to pay, food. What the hell had he done? He had no money coming in. He’d just had a tantrum and left. He’d fucked up big time. Now he had to go and explain himself.
He dragged himself up to the apartment, terrified of facing Matteo, of disappointing him. He wouldn't be mad, Matteo was never mad but he’d just made their lives a whole lot harder. And that was devastating. Still, he needed Matteo more than anything right now so he stepped into the apartment and leant against the door.
Everything felt so heavy and his eyes were burning with unshed tears. He took a deep breath and then another. He tried to calm himself down. He could hear Matteo in the kitchen, cooking him dinner even though he too had been at work all day.
He took another deep breath and headed to the kitchen. There was Matteo at the stove, such a familiar sight. He had his headphones on and was bopping along to whatever he was listening to. David had gotten him a speaker for the kitchen but he tended to prefer his headphones. David didn’t mind, as long as Matteo was singing he didn’t mind.
Right now he was humming along to a tune David didn’t recognise but he felt a warmth wash over him. Just for a second, he felt like maybe everything would be ok. He leant against the doorframe and watched Matteo, completely unaware of him. Or so he thought.
Matteo looked over his shoulder with a grin. “Hey you’re just in time it’s pretty much ready-” his grin faded slightly as he looked at David. His weak smile obviously wasn’t convincing, “hey,” he said again, softer this time, as he turned down the heat and walked over to him.
And suddenly he just knew it was going to be ok. It was going to be ok. Matteo wouldn’t be disappointed with him. Matteo had been telling him to quit for months, years even. David realised it was fine. Yeah, they were probably fucked, they were probably going to have to live pretty tight for a while until he figured something out. But Matteo wasn’t going to leave. He would support him always, he’d figure out ways to keep them fed, stretch out what they had to make bills and rent. Even if they had to move, no matter where they ended up Matteo was his home.
He just stepped into Matteo’s arms and closed his eyes.
“I’ve had such a shit day Matteo,” he whispered.
Matteo pulled back and looked him over, reaching out and stroking his cheek. “Talk about it?”
David nodded.
“Come sit,” Matteo said.
David quietly followed him to the counter and sat on the stool.
“I made casserole,” Matteo said, grabbing a tray out of the oven where he’d kept it warm. He placed it on the counter in front of David and then grabbed the pot with the vegetables. He grabbed some plates before sitting opposite him and gesturing for David to help himself.
David couldn’t. His hands were shaking, he felt so overwhelmed by Matteo right now. Even though he knew Matteo wouldn’t be disappointed, knew it would be ok, David felt awful. Matteo sighed and got up from his stool, walking round to David’s side and just wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight. “Talk to me David,” he whispered.
“I’ve had the worst fucking day Matteo,” he mumbled.
“Mm?”
“You know that video I did, with Quinn Mathers, the author?”
“Yeah it was amazing,” Matteo said, nodding eagerly.
Quinn was a trans sci-fi writer whose work David had been a fan of for a few years. He didn’t even like sci-fi until he read Quinn’s work. He’d started because Quinn was trans and David wanted to support marginalised authors but he got sucked in and now Matteo said he was a superfan. When he’d gotten the chance to interview Quinn he’d almost died. Almost turned it down he was so nervous. Matteo had just rolled his eyes and told him to pull himself together.
Quinn was a genius too, the interview had been amazing. He’d gotten way too much material from it but he was such an insightful and well-spoken guy, all David had been able to do was listen and try not to stutter through his questions.
He’d been so excited to share it. Let people get to know the real Quinn. Share info Quinn hadn’t shared before and David had that opportunity. Quinn trusted David for some reason, liked him and wanted to give him a break.
“They won’t accept it,” David whispered, “said it wasn’t in the tone of the website.”
“Oh fuck them,” Matteo said, squeezing him tight and then pulling back to face him.
“Matteo this meant so much to me,” David said, rubbing furiously at his eyes.
“I know David, I know,” Matteo said. “How hungry are you?”
David felt guilty, Matteo had cooked all this food for him and he couldn’t face it. “Not very, I feel sick,” he admitted.
“Ok let me just put this back in the oven to keep it warm and then let’s go talk,” Matteo said.
David watched Matteo clear everything away, feeling guilty even though he didn’t need to. Matteo wasn’t angry or annoyed with him. Just took his hand and lead him into the living room, drawing the curtains and putting on the lamps before switching the main light off. He sat down on the sofa and David climbed on top of him, Matteo’s arms immediately circling him again.
“But it’s not just the interview,” David said as Matteo settled him on his lap. “It’s everything. Every time I deviated from the stupid boring categories they’ve got me on I get written up. Warned not to break the mould and I’m fucking sick of it. I’ve stayed there because I wanted a job where I can be creative but fuck it I haven’t been creative in years. Matteo, I just churn out video after video about the same mindless shit and it’s the same fucking thing every time and when I want to make a story about something that interests me I’m told no. And then when I try to argue my case they send fucking Leo, the stupid kid to tell me I’m being too emotional.
“Too emotional? What the fuck! Matteo, do you know what they meant by that? Do you know what they were implying? They knew exactly why the interview was important to me Matteo, how the fuck do they even see me? How fucking dare they? But then I couldn’t help it because I was upset and I was fucking close to tears so maybe I am too emotional but not like how they implied and what the fuck is wrong with emotion? Why the fuck can’t I put some emotion or feeling into my stories? Because the advertisers won’t sponsor it? Get better fucking advertisers and then- and then-”
“Breathe,” Matteo said, shifting them so he was laying on the couch and David was on top of him, on his back staring at the ceiling through his tears. Matteo placed a hand on his chest, just feeling his racing heart, the fast measure of his breath, just waiting, trying to slow it.
“I-”
David gasped, he couldn’t catch his breath.
“Just breathe a minute. I’m listening, I hear you. I want you to keep going but I need you to breath for a minute. I wanna hear everything but you’re gonna stop being able to talk so just take a minute for me ok?” Matteo said gently, still holding him tight.
“Ok,” David said. He closed his eyes and focussed on the way Matteo was holding him, grounding him, he felt so safe, so comforted. He took a deep breath, then another, relaxing into Matteo.
“Ok?” Matteo said.
“Yeah,” David whispered.
“I’m here,” Matteo said, “I’m listening.”
“I just broke you know? I just called them out on everything. Told my boss he had absolutely no integrity, that people wanted to see real shit so what harm did it do? Why the fuck did we have to censor ourselves to keep the fucking sponsors happy? Did they not want to reach an audience? And he came back and said my views had been so low I had no room to talk and that’s not fucking fair Matteo. Of course, they are low, I don’t get to talk about what I want.
“Matteo they promised me that when we were up and running I would get a queer space to talk and they won’t. They’re not going to. Said there’s no place for it on their site. What the fuck am I going to do? I’ve wasted three years of my life and I don’t even want to do this. I want to make movies and I’m still fucking here and I don’t know what to do,” David said, finally breaking and letting the tears fall in earnest, giving into his sobs. He turned over and buried his face in Matteo’s chest.
His boyfriend just continued to hold him, rubbing his back gently until he could calm down. “Did you quit?” he asked.
“Yeah, I think so,” David mumbled.
“Good.”
“Good?”
“I’ve been telling you for years to quit David,” Matteo said, stroking away his tears and smiling at him.
“Yeah but I don’t have another job, what the fuck am I gonna do?” David reminded him.
He had to go back. He’d have to go back and beg for his job back. He couldn’t just quit.
“We’ll figure something out,” Matteo said.
David sat up, ignoring Matteo’s whine, not letting him pull him back down. “No it’s not fair, we have rent we have bills, I can’t put it on you,” he said.
“It’ll work out,” Matteo said.
“No-”
“It’ll work out David I have faith in you, you’ll get something else,” Matteo insisted.
“I-”
“And anyway I’ve been saving,” Matteo said.
“Saving?”
“Like any extra money I had just in case,” Matteo said, grinning up at him.
“In case I quit?” David asked slowly.
“Yeah,” Matteo said.
“What the fuck Matteo?” David demanded, he wasn’t angry he was stunned. He probably sounded angry but Matteo knew him well enough by now.
He obviously wasn’t worried if the way he was just smiling up at him fondly was anything to go by.
“We’ve been doing ok for a while and I thought you know, you’d be ready soon to make that jump to chase your dreams again. So I’ve been saving. We’re good for a few months, I promise. Take your time, recoup, take a break even. Start working on your own stuff again, write again, put yourself forward for things you want to work on, don’t think of the money for a while,” he said.
“But Matteo you-”
“I know I’m not earning the big bucks like you, but I’m happy at the bookshop, and we’re not going anywhere, people still want books. So let me support you?” he offered.
David couldn’t help it, he started to cry again. That this kind generous man was his boyfriend astounded him. He would literally give him anything. He’d been thinking of him always. Just quietly putting by so he was ready to support him the moment David was ready to make the jump. David didn’t even feel guilty, it was clear this was something Matteo wanted and he couldn’t even argue. He knew he’d do the same if things were the other way around.
Thankfully Matteo was still happy working in the bookstore where his mother had found him a job after school finished. The owner, Anna, was an old family friend who’d just needed a bit of help here and there. After working there about a year Anna’s health took a downturn and she left Matteo pretty much running the place while she recovered. He’d thrived at that and five years later he was still there, working full time, still in charge of everything and doing well at it.
In addition, he found the time to study psychology part-time, online mostly, a few classes in the evenings. But at his own pace, that was the important thing. So what if it took him five or six years to get his degree? He was studying it because it was interested in it, not for the piece of paper at the end.
The important thing was it all fit Matteo. If he had a day, a week or even months where he couldn’t get up and face the day he was never punished for it. They worked it out, Anna and Marco, the student who worked there part-time, rallying round to make sure Matteo knew he was to take his time, recover and not come back a moment before he was ready.
David could never do that at his place. Wouldn’t even try. He’d caught the flu one winter and had been sent home with a laptop, expected to continue working “between naps” his boss had said.
Matteo had pretty much confiscated the laptop, told him if he didn’t rest that flu was going to become pneumonia and he would end up in the hospital. He may have been afraid of his boss but he didn’t dare mess with Matteo when he was taking care of him. He was somehow both the gentlest and fiercest caretaker David had ever known. He’d been a nightmare after his surgery overly fussing yet refusing to hug him until the deadlines the surgeon had given him were up. Even though David had been told to judge it himself.
David just sighed. He wanted to be happy with his work like Matteo was. He wanted to be able to come home at the end of the day and relax with his boyfriend not worry about deadlines. He wanted to be creative.
“I… I… I wanna work on my own stuff,” David said.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, I know… it’s not going to be easy but… I want to, I want to be happy and that would make me happy,” David said.
Matteo nodded.
“Hey, I could always make you a website if you like. I’m not bad, I made one for the bookstore remember?”
David smiled at him, he had made one for Anna, set up a small online shop for her too. Helped bring her into the twenty-first century she’d said.
“But you could start your own like… there are platforms already and I could help you get set up. But it’d be nice if it was your own. With all your art too, that’d be really cool. And you could stick it to them. And you could talk to Quinn, ask if he’d let you put the interview up on your site, he’s a nice guy, he’d get it. Maybe you could just… I don’t know like you wanted to do queer media right? I know the dream is movies but you could start with this… and I know you can make it. It’s not a race, you make such brilliant content it wouldn’t even take long, you’d have a million subscribers in a month,” Matteo said.
David just stared at him. He remembered that time once when he’d said he could go it alone, thought he was destined to that kind of life. How the hell would he have gotten through all this alone? How could he go without this unconditional, overwhelming support from this man? He wasn’t even scared of the future, even if the website didn’t work, even if he never got anywhere, he could just go work at the bookshop with Matteo and be happy. But he would make it, he’d make it because he had Matteo by his side, gentle encouragement to keep him going always.
“David?”
“Yeah?”
“It’ll be ok,” Matteo said.
“I know,” David said.
“You do?”
“Yeah because you’re here,” David said.
It would be ok, always. He would be ok because he had Matteo, he wasn’t alone, he didn’t have to deal with anything alone again. All this time he’d been struggling at work he’d been ok because he’d always been able to come home to Matteo. The moment he’d walked out that evening, even though he was stressed and scared, he’d known deep down it would be ok. Even though he’d been afraid of disappointing Matteo he’d known that was his own view. That Matteo would never be disappointed, that he’d just take him in his arms and make everything ok again.
No matter how many shitty days there would be in the future, and there would be more, it didn’t matter because he had Matteo, he had a home with this man and he could escape from it all with him.
listen, my social worker “woke” gay roommate called the cops on me when i had a psychotic break. that was his first reaction. he didn’t attempt to contact my friends or family first. he also illegally prevented me from entering our apartment to pick up any of my furniture or personal belongings. at that point, he knew more about psychosis than i did because it was first episode psychosis. social workers are absolutely violent to people with psychosis. i don’t want to see that post supporting them replacing police or other services again.
Honoring the lives lost in the Atlanta shooting
Xiaojie 'Emily' Tan, 49
Tan, 49, was the mother of Jami Webb, a recent graduate from the University of Georgia. She was a licensed massage therapist and the owner of Young’s Asian Massage, along with other businesses in the area, including another spa and a tanning salon, according to state records. She was “the sweetest, most kind-hearted, giving, never-met-a-stranger person,” a friend told Atlanta’s WSB-TV. Just one day away from her 50th birthday when she was killed, according to USA Today, Tan was described by her daughter as thoughtful, devoted to her family, and looking forward to traveling in her retirement.
Hyun Jung Grant, 51
Hyun Jung Grant was a Korean immigrant who worked at Atlanta’s Gold Spa. Her son Randy Park, 23, shared a tribute to his mother on GoFundMe: He said his mother was a single parent who “dedicated her whole life to providing for my brother and I.” She loved dancing and sushi, according to Park, who told The Daily Beast, “She wasn’t just my mother. She was my friend.” Park, who now has to raise his brother alone, is not buying law-enforcement officials’ suggestion that the attack was motivated by a supposed sex addiction, not racism. “That’s bullshit,” he said.
Delaina Ashley Yaun Gonzalez, 33
Yaun Gonzalez, 33, was a mother of two — 13-year-old Mayson and 8-month-old Mia. She had worked all day on Tuesday at the Waffle House a few shops down from Tan’s spa business. She had been looking forward to having a relaxing night out with her husband, Mario Gonzalez, whom she married only last year, and the couple had reportedly never been to Young’s Asian Massage before. According to Fox 5 Atlanta, family members say that Mario Gonzalez, who survived the shooting, is “taking [the situation] hard.” Delaina Ashley Yaun Gonzalez’s friends and family have set up a GoFundMe to address her funeral costs.
Paul Andre Michels, 54
Michels, 54, was a handyman at Young’s Asian Massage and the owner of an electric company. He was only recently hired for the role and excited to take it on after looking for more work during the pandemic, according to a friend who spoke with CBS46. An army veteran originally from Detroit, Michels is one of nine siblings and is survived by his wife of more than two decades. In an interview with the Guardian, his brother John Michels emphasized his kindness. “He was just a regular guy, very good-hearted, very soft-natured,” he said, while noting that Michels had expressed an interest in getting involved in the massage business.
Yong Ae Yue, 63
A licensed massage therapist, she was laid off at the start of the pandemic last year and was excited to finally start shifts at the spa again, her son Elliott Peterson, 42, told The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on Friday morning. Yue’s youngest child, Robert Peterson, 38, agreed, recalling their mother as a kind and deeply caring woman. If you stopped by her house, she’d sit you down, ask if you’d eaten, and then insist on a trip to H Mart grocery store so she could make a meal.
Daoyou Feng, 44
Daoyou Feng, 44, began working at Young’s Asian Massage in recent months, according to Tan’s friend Hynson. She was kind and quiet, he said. Her relatives could not be reached for comment.
Soon Chung Park, 74
Soon Chung Park, 74, was also a worker at an Atlanta spa. Her family didn’t respond when reached for comment. Park previously lived in New York, where she has relatives, her son-in-law, Scott Lee, told the New York Times. “She got along with her family so well,” Lee told the newspaper.
Suncha Kim, 69
Suncha Kim, 69, worked at one of the spas in Atlanta. Her family could not be reached for comment. Kim, a grandmother, was married for more than 50 years, a family member told the Times. She enjoyed line dancing and worked hard, the relative said.
Elcias Hernandez-Ortiz, 30
Hernandez-Ortiz, 30, was the only survivor of the victims who were shot on Tuesday, and he remains hospitalized for multiple gunshot wounds in his “forehead, throat, lungs and stomach,” according to the Washington Post. He was shot while standing outside in the shopping center where Young’s Asian Massage is located. “He came from nothing and has come a long way; that is why I have faith he will survive this,” his wife Flor Gonzalez told the Washington Post. Gonzalez has also set up a GoFundMe to help with the costs of Hernandez-Ortiz’s medical care.
I just read this on twitter…
A book crystallized in the ocean
Solomon’s Shield is the name of the app
OMG Download this!!!! Stop Police Brutality!
tranparent pride hearts for your blogs/icons!
[credit is not required but appreciated]
[go wild]
“Beans are so threatening” God I am so so sorry that we didn’t use tear gas and rubber bullets that you so clearly prefer.
i simply cannot stop thinking about this.
to stay warm, advice from a canadian who deals with -40C weather to the americans in the south
blankets and sheets, get them layers in your bed. wear a loose hoodie to bed and socks too. it helps. put a blanket under you too to keep your back warm
put a rug underneath your bed, it helps with insulating your bed from the cold
drink water, like hot weather n the summer, cold weather will dehydrate you and you will get colder. so to warm up, drink water
get enough sleep. srsly, it will help you deal with cold weather
take a lot of breaks if you are going outside. like stagger how long you are outside and hydrate
don’t burn propane indoors, or keep your oven open
if you are going to make a fire, do it in a fireplace and make sure your flume is open
share body heat with your pet or family by getting under the covers together. it helps.
hot water bottles, electric heat pads and rice bags are great to warm up the bed.
close your blinds and use curtains or sheets to cover the windows, it will help with insulating from the cold. especially at night. you can even get some styrofoam from a hardware store or window insulation. my sister’s apartment had terrible windows and she used blackout curtains to keep the heat in
baking! do some baking. it really heats up the house. like make a pound cake, something that takes 60 mins. srsly even in -40C i had to turn off the heat in my apartment because the oven heated the whole place and also, CAKE
going outside requires: shirt and sweater/hoodie , sometimes an undershirt if you aren’t used to the cold. keep your core covered! a scarf! the heaviest coat, socks! pants! and water proof or insulated boots. double up on socks too! and gloves and a hat. in a pinch a kerchief can make a good headband and combine that with a hood it’s a makeshift hat
give your car time to warm up, the oil needs to be at the midpoint! so start the car and let it run before going somewhere
keep two car lengths between cars, it gives you enough time to break. the road is icy! and you probably don’t have winter tires, road salt or ploughing so give your car time to stop. like srsly, also go slow! put your hazards on too to let other cars see you and if you are going slow
soup, make some soup
also hot chocolate is also great
stay warm and i love you guys
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