Barry Is Horrified And Freaks Out. He Didn’t Know That Shazam Was BABY!

Fun monkey fact:

In macaques (especially Barbary), males will often stop fights between eachother by one of them offering the wronged party an infant to hold. The wronged monkey gets so distracted by the cuteness of the baby that they forget what the fight was about.

Macaques will also bond together socially by sharing babysitting duty. The social act is considered so important that long-standing rivals will come to a truce to care for the infant.

So imagine Sun Wukong and Macaque about to fight when...

SWK: "Wait! Consider this!" *holds out MK* Macaque: "...ok he is pretty adorable." *takes MK and holds him. Starts grooming his hair.* MK, throughly confused: "What is happening??" SWK, smugly: "Monkey instincts. You're doing great bud." *some time passes* SWK: "...ok, can I have my successor back now?" Macaque: *hisses and holds MK closer* SWK: "Aww come on! You've been holding him all day! It's my turn!" MK: *has fallen asleep by now*

Just the two playing on eachothers instincts as a battle strategy and failing terribly.

I think its even funnier if Steph isnt a part of the relationship. Shes just that one friend sho you fed and now refuses to leave.

tim is checking in with the batfam, but no one gets out of that bed without bernard's permission, AND there's enough space for steph when she gets back from patrol.

PERCY was confused too. I mean he was upset but he was also confused.

Nothing will be as funny as the utter confusion in Ares, Annabeth, and Grover’s faces when Percy challenged Ares to single combat

To be honest. DCxDP where the reason Danny meets the bats is Ace the Bat-hound

Like, just think about it for a second. Danny is in Gotham for college, or maybe he just moved out to find a city where having mad scientist parents isn’t actually that unusual.

He can see ghosts.

The ghosts know this.

Now he’s getting harassed left and right by spirits trying to get closure. Fine, whatever, most of them are a one-and-done type deal, and the amount of ghosts trying to get his help steadily decreases.

Except for this one very stubborn dog.

It just keeps showing up and leading him to crime scenes! He doesn’t know how many “anonymous tips” he can call in to the cops before they trace his phone! And this dog, this incredibly good boy, will not stop trying to help the city. He’s never met anyone with such a strong sense of justice, let alone a dog. Can dogs even have a moral compass?

And so Danny just accepts the fact that Ace isn’t going anywhere and becomes his reluctant sidekick/dedicated medium. He leans into the whole thing, dressing up in a mix of traditional magic-user attire and accessories that pay homage to the ghost dog.

He becomes somewhat well known. The psychopomp detective following around the shadowy figure of a German Shepard? That’s unusual! That’s weird! I mean, it’s not the weirdest thing in Gotham, sure, but he’s a new vigilante and he’s got a ghost dog that people can only see when it’s around him. Someone’s gonna notice.

Damian, as Robin, is the first to reach out to him.

Ace doesn’t know Damian but he does know a Robin, and while this isn’t his Robin, he’s still friendlier than usual. Danny’s panicking because oh god the bats are here and also is this kid gonna steal my ghost dog, Damian is absolutely delighted by Ace, and Ace is just happy to see a Robin again.

Damian decides that the psychopomp isn’t a danger to anyone, and there’s no reason to put this encounter into his reports, really, and perhaps Danny can help with some of his cases in the future.

Danny is sweating bullets because Damian basically tells him that he’ll keep him secret as long as he gets to play with Ace. Ace is happy that he’s finally getting some bat affiliated crime-fighting assistance.

And so, Danny is now both Ace AND Damian’s reluctant assistant. At least whenever he’s in trouble, he can always call a middle schooler to help him.

(Is Robin even in school? He’s out patrolling damn near every night, and he stays out late as hell. Does he have a bedtime? He should.)

Eventually it gets to the point where Damian is going over to Danny’s house. When he first sees it, he has a damn bitch you live like this moment, to which Danny responds that not everyone has the money to afford a nice place. Damian counters that he could at least take the time to clean up, and Danny replies that he’s working, going to school, and being a vigilante assistant to a ghost dog, something’s got to give.

Danny nearly has a heart attack when he checks his bank account the next day and sees that someone transferred him 10,000 dollars.

And so they get into a routine. Danny and Damian fight crime with Ace at night, and occasionally Damian stops by during the day to play with Ace and have Danny help with his homework.

(Damian is smart enough to do it on his own, but some of the instructions are written incredibly confusingly, and he would never admit to needing help to his family. Danny is just glad that the kid is in school and cares about his education, blissfully unaware that he’s basically emotionally adopted him.)

Damian is used to being in Danny’s company.

Eventually, when going over a case with the family, Damian absentmindedly remarks that he’ll have to ask Danny about some of the clues that they might be missing. Nightwing asks who he means and Damian makes a face like he just swallowed a lemon.

Cue shitstorm.

Who is “Danny?” Why is Damian willing to ask for help from anyone, much less someone outside of the family? Does he know who Damian is? Has Damian been compromised? What the hell is going on?

Damian now has to explain that Danny is the psychopomp with the ghost dog who he might have met hunted down while on patrol and conveniently not mentioned, but he’s not a bad person, really, and he lets him play with Ace, and he’s been quite helpful on certain cases due to his ability to talk to ghosts.

Bruce insists that the family meet Danny. Damian, hoping that he won’t just skip town the second he hears the news, relents.

Danny is surprisingly eager to meet the bats, considering his earlier fears.

Damian, blissfully unaware of what’s coming, sets a time and place to meet.

Once everyone is there, he gives Bruce the earful of a lifetime.

Robin is in middle school! Danny knows that there’s no way to stop the boy from going on patrol, but you could at least shift his schedule so he gets enough sleep on school nights! Does the Bat even know where he is half the time?! (No) And why isn’t he comfortable asking his family for help with both cases and homework? Did they ever even notice how much time he was spending at Danny’s house? If Danny was a bad person, he could have seriously hurt the poor boy! Shame on you!

Nightwing is mortified that Damian didn’t trust him enough to tell him about any of this. Red Hood is laughing his ass off, because yeah Danny is making good points but he’s also chewing out the literal Batman. Tim is recording the whole thing. Steph is delighted by the absolute gall of this Danger Twink™️, and already planning to add him to several groupchats. Damian is more embarrassed than he’s ever been in his entire life.

You, he points to Nightwing, did your academic life feel supported when you were a Robin? Nightwing is too stunned to speak. Red Hood, eternal shit-stirrer, says that oh, we all prioritized patrol over our education, that’s just how it is. Red Robin actually dropped out of high school to avoid distractions, did you know that?

Danny honest-to-god shrieks at this.

He finishes his angry rant and leaves, everyone too stunned to stop him.

And as it turns out, Tim wasn’t the only person recording the whole thing.

The entire internet is blowing up with Psychopomp The Danger Twink™️’s rant. People are taking sides. Things are getting messy. Red Hood literally admitting on-camera to previously being a Robin is somehow not the main focus here.

Eventually someone connects some dots from the video, as well as stories circling the internet about the psychopomp. A ghost dog named Ace, who is the literal only reason that the psychopomp is fighting crime at all, which seems incredibly fond of Nightwing and Robin.

A crime-fighting dog who wants constant attention from both the current and original Robin.

Oh my god, Ace the Bat-hound died and became a crime-fighting ghost.

And, somehow, that’s still not the strangest thing going on in Gotham.

I would love to see this in a fic. If ANYONE finds something like this, spill the names. Don’t be shy. I will MAKE an account for that sight if I don’t have one already.

ok but like imagine Starscream in RB

Starscream gets shot down by Megatron over the Atlantic, and ends up washed up on the shore of Griffin Rock. He's disoriented, Energon deficient, and then those forsaken Autobots find him.

But they don't attack.

Heatwave kept saying they should just shoot him on the spot. I mean, it's Starscream we're talking about here, he could wipe them and the island out in a day's work. But yet again, it's Cody Burns, their human companion, who sees potential.

"What if we help him? Maybe he'll be nice if we help him." And so Heatwave ended up having to carry one of the most vicious 'Cons in the galaxy with his team, and house him in his home.

It took three days for Blades to patch the wounds, and three more for him to recover from the stasis and regain his senses completely. By then, Cody'd been itching to see him. So the first day he could, Cody got down into the bunker with all his coolest Earth stuff.

"Hi sir Starscream." He greeted, even making a small bow to the 'Con. Starscream, however, scoffed.

"What do you want, fleshy?" His voice was cold, but his servos gripped his frame nervously. He'd never, other than Miko, encountered a human child that wasn't scared out of their mind. Hell, even less a child that called him sir Starscream! So, against his gruff will, he sat down on the hard, concrete floor. He saw the young boy's face light up, and a strange feeling tugged at his spark. Why was that sparkling so... Happy to see him?

Cody grabbed some of the 'Bot's favourite things: Boulder's art, Heatwave's book on martial art, Blades' cartoons and comics and Chase's law enforcement book. He also grabbed his scrapbook, and some pencils.

"Sir, I'd like to show you some of my friend's favourite things. I know you're probably not very fond of them, since you're a noble Decepticon, but they're not out to harm you. We're a rescue team, and a family."

By the end of Cody's speech and show-and-tell round, Starscream's spark ached. Leaders are supposed to... to like their team? He bit his digit to stay quiet, but the realisation of Megatron's corrupted leadership finally seems to get him.

"He... he's horrible..."

It's out before he realises it, and immediately shrinks back like his leader's about to break down the door and grab his throat. He shuts his optics tight, weapons at ready for whatever happens next.

But instead of cold, sharp digits digging into his frame, he's met by a soft, warm touch. He opens one optic, slowly.

Cody stands next to his arm, and hugs him to the best of his abilities.

"He can't get you here, the 'Bots won't let him get you here."

That simple gesture, after all he's heard about family, is enough to nearly bring him to tears.

«-»

Two years later, Chase's held at gunpoint by a heavily damaged Soundwave. And guess who swoops in, now in a flashing white-blue-red paint job, to protect his brother.

I think a massive facet of Tim's secret identity should be that everyone in Gotham knows that if Tim had Bat Skills, he would simply be a benevolent supervillain instead. A feral little gremlin who would take out the kneecaps of every boomer trying to embezzle charity funds. Like, this is the bitch that's constantly ready to fight God in a Denny's parking lot. He would be out there committing murder every time someone tried to rezone Gotham's voting districts again; he'd just show up in their dark living room with anime eyeshine like, "oh? And you thought you could get away with this? 🔪"

Absolutely. Valid. Truth. Yes.

mcd!aphmau may be an incredibly good person and a massive pacifist with more wisdom than anger but. i think she should be allowed to tell people to eat shit and fuck off. you’d have to push her pretty far to get her to do it but she should still tell people to eat shit and fuck off. i think she’s more annoyed with people than she shows

In my mind, MCD!Aphmau and Zane have a very special unique relationship in that Zane is the only person on earth that Aphmau hates more than anything. Like, this is a woman born from the mercy of Christ. And she fucking hates his guts so bad. He’s done far too much damage to everyone she’s loved for her to ever see him as more than pure evil. She is a woman of redemption and even i think she would see a Zane redemption arc as utterly impossible to ever achieve. She has a “kill on sight” policy that ONLY applies to him and NO ONE ELSE. Her and Zane could go back and forth bickering and telling each other “fuck you” over and over again. Even Shad earns more sympathy and mercy and empathetic understanding from Aphmau than Zane does. Aphmau would sooner befriend The Shadow Lord himself than EVER side with Zane.

And on Zane’s side of things, Aphmau is special because no one has ever thwarted him as much as her. He absolutely underestimated her at the beginning, thinking she’s just some random peasant girl in a shitty old town that no one’s ever heard of. And then she turns out to be his enemy nm. 1. The arch nemesis. I very much picture their dynamic in my head as a constant chess match going on between Zane and Aphmau. Zane is normally the king of chess, he gets everything he wants and the whole world cowers before him, but Aphmau has never cowered before in her life and she is most certainly not going to start now. She doesn’t quit. He can back her into a corner, he can take away her loved ones, he can put her in impossible dilemmas and threaten the lives of everyone she cares about with certain doom, all scenarios that would normally crush the average opponent and get them to cave under their own fear and beg him for mercy. But Aphmau doesn’t. She keeps fucking going and she never stops, she just can’t be held down, no matter what he tries. And in the end, he loses. They end up in the Irene dimension and he loses.

There’s something to be said that the High Priest of the Church of Irene’s worst nemesis is Irene herself. The very woman he’s supposed to worship with utter devotion, but once he actually meets the object of his religious faith, he REFUSES TO. He HATES her. He has met his own God and has decided he’d rather punch her square in the face than pledge himself to her. No one hates Aphmau more than Zane, and no one hates Zane more than Aphmau.

anyway i think she would tell him to fuck off and die all of the time and he’d tell her right back at you bitch

@gilbirda Ok, so you made a snippet of on of your AUs a while back (braindead rejected! soulmate i think) and I haven't been able to think of much else since. So my brain made a little thingy for you!

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1. Tim takes a risk one day by writing back to whoever was doodling on his body, with a glittery purple gel pen, asking them to stop trying to contacting him.

All the person asked was, "Why?"

Tim never answers.

2. Danny faces constant rejection from his peers, authority figures, his parents and sister neglect him and now his own soulmate doesn't want him. They hadn't even met before he was rejected. Jazz finds out about Dannys powers and tries to reach out but Danny rejects her pretty violently due to his own pain. Then the episode where Sam and Tucker ditch him for Gregor happens and he gives up.

The two people in his life that has had pretty much complete control over his life and trajectory just abandoned him and he does not take it well. He ripped the symbol off his chest, disappeared and never came back.

3. Danny zooms into a new dimension/universe/whatever to avoid his former friends and family from being able to track him only to land in a place called Central City and immediately getting roped into helping Captain Cold who gives him a normal domino mask and they end up working together for a while.

4. Danny somehow overhears one of the speedster talking on the phone about his friends brothers soulmate issue at some point and they perfectly describe the interaction that happened between Danny and his soulmate all those years ago, down to the glittery purple gel pen and the types of doodles Danny had made as a kid and the things he said.

Danny learned one of his soulmates belonged to a group of detective vigilantes in a place called Gotham. Unfortunately he was spotted by the speedster and Danny had to bounce.

5. The Flash made reports to the Justice League about a meta teen who hes been having trouble with for a while and can't seem to pin down. He only asked for tips though as he "could handle it himself."

6. Danny leaves for Gotham and learned about Catwoman and Batmans weird Master Thief and Greatest Detective dynamic and decided that's what he wants to do. He was going to make his soulmate chase after him one way or another. Someone was going to want him even if they were wanting him behind bars.

He begins robbing bank vaults and museums, leaving no trace or clue as to what happened until he starts leaving a calling card of sorts.

7. Jason, who's been on the outs with his family lately meets this spunky white haired meta kid running around with a sci-fi mask/visor thing and giving supplies to homeless encampments and keeping the less fortunate alive and befriends him. He learns that this is the guy everyone has been searching for and just...tells no one. Jason is all for a Robin Hood vigilante, and really, its kinda funny to see his family squirm.

8. Phantom and Catwoman rob the same museum at the same time but for different things. They stare at eachother from where they're both still crouched from thier respective landings until Danny breaks the tension with "I didn't see you if you didn't see me?"

Catwoman laughs, amused. "Sure."

9. Danny finally narrowed down which of the batfam is his soulmate and introduced himself to them as Phantom.

The first thing Danny did was hit on Tim. Tim is flustered but otherwise doesn't really respond to it and tries to fight Phantom into submission, so of course Danny ghosts him by disappearing through a roof mid fight. Danny made a big show of his intangibility in that fight and made it seem like it was the only power he had but he was very skilled with it and he wanted to impress him.

10. Phantom becomes well known to the underbelly of Gotham. Mostly the homeless and nightworkers. But Danny was open and friendly. Never judging and always ready to lend a helping hand. Even better. He never came to collect on favors.

Over time, they became loyal to him.

11. Danny gets framed for a series of murders and the whole gang (minus Hood) are trying to capture him, thus, motorcycle chase scene. They use the white of his tires to tell when he's gone intangible due to all the dirt falling off the wheels. Nightwing jumps onto the bike and shocks Danny with his encrizma sticks right before Danny grits out "bye bye birdy~" and makes a big show of taking in a deep breath and holding it.

Nightwing is forced to jump off the bike as Danny runs through the concrete abutment of the overpass and coming out the other side

12. Danny meets Tim and Duke in his civilian form while he was at a Wayne tech conference. Danny had been asked about one of his inventions and was trying to show off the blueprints and explain things and thats why he was there in the first place. Duke of course, was internally screaming because that's the guy thats the guy they've been hunting for nearly a year but can find nothing on.

Red Robin confronts Phantom that night on a rooftop and Phantom laughs at him, "Thats why I was avoiding Signal for so long. He'd see my magical girl form and know instantly."

RR holds out a pair of handcuffs and says "Its over Danny." Phantom smirks and says, "I don't think it is, Tim" before jumping off onto a different roof and disappearing into the night. Tim is shook.

13. Danny over hears Robin berating RR at an old clocktower and intervenes, "Little Wayne, you do realize you were the first person I figured out, right?"

Damian proceeds to lose his mind.

14. Tim accidentally finds a material that Phantom can't phase through and quickly gets to work making things he can use against Danny. What he doesn't know is that Danny can phase through it he just pretended he couldn't because he wanted to see what would happen/what Tim would do.

Danny can sense the material and it feels really wierd to him, but doesn't harm him at all.

15. RR manages to knock Phantoms visor off his face and realizing it was made of tech he swipes it and brings it back to the cave for study.

He wasn't ready for all the information on the computer. Not only was his nemesis(?) from another plain of reality (he thinks Danny is from the ghost zone) but he was once a superhero with his own Rogues Gallery and human city to protect. Which begs the question, why did he become a Phantom thief?

16. The Joker hears about Phantom giving the bats the run around and comes to a misunderstanding about which bat he's been messing with which ultimately ends with Joker saying that he is Batmans ultimate nemesis and Phantom asking what that had to do with him? The misunderstanding is cleared up when Phantom complained about Joker even thinking that he was flirting with Batman because "Ew! He's an old man!"

Joker still got a few shots in for the heck of it but so did our ghost boy but they were no longer enemies.

17. The whole batfam had been freaking out about finally capturing Phantom and celebrating and plotting on how they were gonna get him to keep his mouth shut about thier identities until Jason came in,

Jason: Need help?

Phantom: Please?

Jason: *escapes with Danny*

Batfam: What?! No!!! Why?!

18. The batfam have only a vague idea of the Robin Hood thing going on. They know he's doing it just not to the extent its gone to. They find out later on that Phantom had been working with RH and his gang to sell off the items and most of the profits go to helping people. Other times he strait up gives jewelry and whatnot to children and working girls because "Everyone deserves something pretty, and even if its not your style you can keep it for a rainy day"

Phantom quickly gains a following and Danny doesn't even know about it. Clueless indeed.

19. Dannys main motivation in this is essentially just playing Cops and Robbers with Red Robin. Nothing else really matters to him. Not the robberies, not the fact he's working with a crime lord, not even his own safety matters much to him anymore. Hes readily zooming down the path of self destruction and Hood starts telling his family stuff, but only because he was genuinely worried about "Casper" crashing and burning.

20. No one knows why Phantom is fixated on Red Robin. He refuses to tell them. Red thinks its just because he's the smartest of the bats and he's not entirely wrong.

21. Danny legit started scheduling his heists with Tim to ensure they're both free after one couldn't make it too many times which blew the birds mind. Phantom must have been just that confident that he would always win. The bats eventually think Danny will stop stealing if RR isn't in the city for a long period of time. Danny more or less followed him and stole stuff from whatever city Tim was in. If there wasn't any museums or banks then Danny would steal a local landmark. Tim still wasn't sure how Phantom stole an entire building that one time but it had never been seen since.

22. Hood grows to be very protective of our favorite ghost boy. They bond and are actually really close. Danny admits he always wanted an older brother.

23. Tim goes off world for a while to see how Danny would react and Danny just...drops off the radar. No one knows where he is and after a week or two they start getting worried.

Tim returns after three months and Danny reappears two weeks after him with a tan and keepsakes from the places he visited on his vacation. Tim later screams into his pillow.

24. Tim has made it his personal mission to figure out who Danny really is, why he's fixated on him, where he came from, ect. Hes trying so hard but can't find anything. Its almost like he didn't exist before. Tim suddenly got an idea after Phantom accidentally got hit in the face and got a nosebleed. Tim saw green blood and immediately realized Danny might not even be human. Fortunately for our little ghost, he thinks he's an alien. A Martian specifically. Tim manages to snag a good sample from treating Phantoms wounds. Ghostboy was so focus on his core thrumming and mentally comparing it to his heart racing that he didn't even notice.

25. Tim later freaks out because the meta is freaking made out of Lazarus water.

The entire batfam was not happy to discover this and decided to work together to pressure Phantom into telling them what he was and what exactly he wanted.

Mk can use creation magic, usually used play doh when he was younger. When he’s older, before he picks up the staff he makes an eternal companion.

Qi Ying Zi, Mk’s ‘shadow reflection’, is a demon of no specific animal.

Here’s a little snippet that I’ve written so far:

Mk smiles to himself, humming as he molds his clay into the vague shape of a person before grabbing a bit more. He molds pointed ears, a thin and pointed tail, curly hair, and claws. He grins to himself, proud of his first work of clay. “Qi Ying Zi,” Mk announces as he sets his creation down to dry. “My shadow, my friend,” he tells the little thing, reaching for his sketchbook to plan out colors.

Eventually the teen decides on making Ying Zi purples, black, and grays with gold tints. Yeah, then Ying can be there own person while still being Mk’s shadow. The teen sets his colors aside to start on clothes designs. He knows how to sew enough to make Ying little clothes, it’s not like his clayworks ever becomes bigger than he made them.

Mk smiles to himself as he works, technopop filling the room with noise. He hums along, cheerful and excited to see how this figurine will act.

My idea is basically, Mk makes a friend, expecting them to stay small enough to fit in his pocket. Instead he makes a demon companion that’s human sized and prone to following his creator around. Mk throws out his clay and sells his kiln.

Mk promises Ying Zi to never make another Creation. Without an outlet for his Creation power, Ying Zi starts getting stronger. Ying Zi becomes sort of like Macaque, a ‘shadow’ of the original. Except Mk, as shown multiple times in the show, would never leave his shadow like Wukong did his.